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10 Reasons Why You Should be the True You

10 Reasons Why You Should be the True You

Self-discovery isn’t for wimps. It takes a lot of courage, strength, and awareness to become the person you were meant to be.

You think you’re on the right path but somehow you feel lost. You think you’re doing your best. And you probably are, but deep inside you hear a little voice crying to get out. You try to silence it but you can still hear it.

Your loved ones want the best for you. Since you were a child your parents had their own dreams about what you will become, who you’ll choose to love, and how you will live your life.

That’s lovely when it works favorably, but sometimes it doesn’t work at all, and suddenly you feel lost and confused. You’ve lost your dreams, desires, and vision of the life you wanted. Caring about what other people want for you can cause you to live to fulfill their desires and forget about what your own.

Happiness cannot happen if you don’t live your truth. It may cause mistakes, failure, and regrets—but it will also bring lessons, wisdom, and personal harmony. If you don’t live your truth, you will become angry, resentful, and end up in a life that doesn’t suit you. But of course, it’s not easy to just be true to who you are.

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Of course, you don’t want to end up living on the streets, or sleeping on a park bench. Finding your inner truth is a process that takes time. And sometimes it takes a very long time. You have to work to pay the bills, but while you are being responsible, try to be true to that voice inside you.

Not everyone wants a marriage. Some people love the joys of single life—sharing their bed with empty sushi containers, three dogs and an iPhone—while others can’t imagine eating dinner alone—a night without an argument over the air conditioning (too hot or too cold) and a bathroom floor without someone else’s wet towels on it. Some women came out of their mother’s womb with a natural ability to change diapers, never sleep, and the strength to tolerate a toddler’s temper tantrum. And then there are women who are truly content knowing that a miniature version of themselves will not be brought forth into future generations. Whichever one you are is OK—because that’s who you are; it’s what you want, and who you were meant to be.

When you discover the true you, AHA! happens; you know what you want and are free to go after it with every ounce of your being. When you do, you live contently—comfortable in your own skin—able to achieve whatever impossible dreams you had imagined for yourself.

Listening to your inner voice is a skill. It’s a journey that doesn’t happen overnight. It’s about tuning in to your deeper self and tuning out the noise that is disrupting your own voice. It’s a daily practice of trial and error. Sometimes you have to change the direction you were headed in, make a u-turn, and go back again before you can move forward. It’s about falling down, getting hurt, brushing yourself off, and getting up again and again.

If you want to excel you need to know who you are—then you can move forward. You can fortify your strengths and strengthen your weaknesses, then face your flaws and strive to overcome them. Every day is a chance to become a better version of your self, not a better version of somebody else. As Oscar Wilde said, “Be yourself, everyone else is taken.”

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Here are nine reasons why being the true YOU is the best way to be.

1. You can celebrate your nature!

Even if it’s different than what everybody expects of you, notice what makes you happy. It’s easy to go along with the crowd. Quickly you can slip into becoming what someone else wants you to be. Pay attention to what makes you smile. Do more of it. As we age, we lose our inner child filled with talents, wonder, and amazement. What was your favorite activity when you were a child? Writers wrote, artists painted, and engineers built block towers or took apart their mother’s toaster.

2. You won’t lose sight of your own dreams.

The longer you ignore your dreams, the more they fade away. So don’t ignore them for too long, unless you’ve replaced them with other dreams that you’re content with.

3. You will experience the joy of inner peace.

Peace comes from harmony, when your body and soul align. Peace is a calm feeling that too many people don’t get to experience. Inner peace warms your soul.

4. You will feel good in your own skin.

You can’t be in somebody’s else’s skin. Yours is custom-fit just for you. You’re a unique package. Your personality, style, and way of thinking, acting, and speaking is unlike anyone else’s. Besides, it’s exhausting trying to be someone you are not.

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5. You won’t feel like a phony.

Trying to behave in a way that doesn’t match your inner truth feels as if you’re trying to make tight shoes feel comfortable. You may love the way they look, but no matter how hard you try they still hurt with every step you take.

6. You will get that warm cozy feeling when you put your head on your pillow at night—and a good night’s sleep.

There’s nothing as spiritually satisfying as crawling into bed, putting your head on your pillow, pulling fluffy covers up to your chin, and feeling your soul smile.

7. You can become your best self.

It gets confusing when you try to be someone you’re not. It’s like spending your entire day in a clown costume. It’s fun for a little while but after a few hours you start to squirm. The exterior doesn’t match the interior. And remember, Confucius says, “No matter where you go, there you are.”

8. You will learn to spend time alone.

Peer pressure affects adults, too. We succumb to group mentality. If you really want to be your truest, best self, spend time alone. Take walks by the beach, or in nature. Set aside quiet time so that all you hear is the sound of your heart beating. Do what you enjoy.

“The two best days in your life are the day you were born and the day you find out why.”

—Mark Twain

9. You will be more willing to reach outside your comfort zone.

Sometimes we get stuck in comfort zones that aren’t very comfortable. We’ve simply adjusted to the discomfort because of fear. It’s scary to discover “the true you.” You worry if people will still like you or wonder what your life will be like if you make a change. Discomfort isn’t a bad thing when it’s helping you grow in a positive direction. Once in awhile, it’s good to measure your comfort zone: it is harmful or beneficial to you?

10. You can still be realistic.

Of course, you have to pay the bills so don’t quit your job right now. Take time to nurture your inner truth so that you can responsibly transition into your dream job. But that doesn’t mean just because it isn’t happening now that it will never happen.

Self-discovery is an endless journey.

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Last Updated on June 19, 2019

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

6 Ways to Be a Successful Risk Taker and Take More Chances

I’ve stood on the edge of my own personal cliffs many times. Each time I jumped, something different happened. There were risks that started off great, but eventually faded. There were risks that left me falling until I hit the ground. There were risks that started slow, but built into massive successes.

Every risk is different, but every risk is the same. You need to have some fundamentals ready before you jump, but not too many.

It wouldn’t be a risk if you knew everything that was about to happen, would it? Here’re 6 ways to be a successful risk taker.

1. Understand That Failure Is Going to Happen a Lot

It’s part of life. Everything we do has failure attached to it. All successful people have stories of massive failure attached to them. Thinking that your risk is going to be pain free and run as smooth as silk is insane.

Expect some pain and failure. Actually, expect a lot of it. Expect the sleepless nights with crazy thoughts of insecurity that leave you trembling under the covers. It’s going to happen, no matter how positive you are about the risk you are about to take.

When failure hits, the only options are to keep going or quit. If you expect falling into a meadow of flowers and frolicking unicorns, then you’re going to immediately quit once you realize that getting to that meadow requires you to go through a rock filled cave filled with hungry bats.

2. Trust the Muse

Writing a story isn’t a big risk. It’s really just a risk on my time. So when I start writing a story, I’m scared it will be time wasted. Of course, it never really is. Even if the story doesn’t turn out fabulous, I still practiced.

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When I’ve taken risks in my life, the successful ones always seemed to happen when I followed the muse. Steven Pressfield describes the muse,

“The Muse demands depth. Shallow does not work for her. If we’re seeking her help, we can’t stay in the kiddie end. When we work, we have to go hard and go deep.”

The muse is a goddess who wants our attention and wants us to work on our passion.

If you’re taking a risk in anything, it’s assumed that there is some passion built up behind that risk. That passion, deep inside you, is the muse. Trust it, focus on it, listen to it.

The most successful articles and stories I write are the ones I’ve focused all my attention on. There were no interruptions during their creative development. I didn’t check my phone or go watch my Twitter feed. I was fully engaged in my work.

Trust the muse, focus your attention on your risk, let the ideas and path develop themselves, and leave the distractions at the side of the road.

3. Remember to Be Authentic

Taking a risk and then turning into something you’re not, is only going to lead to disaster. Whether you are risking a new relationship or new opportunity, you must be yourself throughout the entire process.

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How many times have you acted like you loved something just because the men or woman you just started going out with loved it?

For example, I’m not an office worker. I have an incredibly hard time working in a confined timeline (ie. 9-5). That’s why I write. I can do it whenever the mood strikes, I don’t have somebody breathing down my neck, telling me that I’m five minutes late, or missed a comma somewhere. I don’t have to walk on eggshells wondering if what I’m writing will get me fired or make me lose a promotion. I can just be myself, period.

One girlfriend didn’t understand that. She believed solely in the 9-5 motto, specifically something in human resources because that was a very stable job. I was scared for my future, but I stuck with the relationship because of my own insecurities and acted like I would do it to make her happy.

Here’s a tip: NEVER take away from your happiness to make somebody else satisfied (note I didn’t say happy).

Making somebody else happy will make you happy. Doing something to satisfy somebody is murder on your soul.

4. Don’t Take Any Risks While You’re Not Clearheaded

I’d been considering the risk for a couple weeks. It all sounded good. I was 22 and I could be rich in a couple of years. That’s what they were selling me, anyways.

One night, while at a house party with some friends, I found myself at a computer. A couple of my friends were standing nearby and asked me what I was doing. I told them I was considering starting my own business and it was only going to cost me $1,500.

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Of course, when a bunch of drunk people are surrounded by more drunk people, things get enthusiastic. It sounded like the best business venture in the world to everybody, including me. So I signed up and gave them my credit card number.

A few painful months and close to $4,000 dollars lost later, I quit the business. I was young and fell into the pyramid scheme trap. It was an expensive drunk decision.

Drinking heavily and making decisions has a proven track record of failure. So when you have something important to decide, don’t let your emotions take over your brain.

5. Fully Understand What You’re Risking

It was the start of my baseball comeback. I got a tryout with a professional scout and killed it. After the tryout, he talked to my girlfriend and myself, making sure we understood I would be gone for up to 6 months at a time. That strain on the relationship could be tough.

We understood. I left to play ball, chose to stay in the city I played in, and a year later we broke up. Not because of baseball, see point 3 above. Taking big risks can have massive impacts on everything in your life from relationships to money. Know what you’re risking before you take the risk.

If you believe the risk will be worth it or you have the support you need from your family, then go ahead and make the leap.

You can get more guidance on how to take calculated risks from this article: How to Take Calculated Risk to Achieve More and Become Successful

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6. Remember This Is Your One Shot Only

As far as we know officially, this is our one shot at life, so why not take some risks?

The top thing people are saddened by on their deathbeds are these regrets. They wish they did more, asked that girl in the coffee shop out, spoke out when they should have, or did what they were passionate about.

Don’t regret. Learn and experience. Live. Take the risks you believe in. Be yourself and make the world a better place.

Now go ahead, take that risk and be successful at it!

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Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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