Self care is necessary for our physical and mental health, yet often it’s the first thing we drop when we find ourselves stretched for time. Without adequate self care, we are less likely to be the best possible version of ourselves, and our relationships, work, and experience of the world suffers as a result. Although it might feel like the opposite, the times when we feel least able to pay attention to our self care are the times when we most need it.
If you’re feeling stretched for time, it can be difficult to know how to start fitting self care into your week. Here is the 5-step guide to self care for busy people:
1. Start with your needs first
Self care is conventionally portrayed as pampering yourself, however, what it’s really about is meeting your human needs. This could be a need for relaxation, a need for quiet, a need for connection, a need for stability, and much more. Before you engage in any kind of self care related activity, think to yourself: what needs do I want to meet here? What do I need most in my life right now?
Not only will this help you truly care for yourself on a very fundamental level, but it will make your self care more efficient. Instead of engaging in random self care activities in an attempt to feel ‘better’, you can pinpoint exactly what it is you need right now and go straight to meeting that need.
2. Schedule it
“I don’t have enough time” is one of the most common reasons I hear from people who are struggling to engage in self care on a regular basis. The antidote is this belief is to make time. Perhaps this sounds easier said than done, but one certain way to create time for your self care is to schedule it. Find a gap in your calendar during the next week and schedule in an appointment called “self care time”. Then, most importantly, stick to it.
Be realistic with your scheduling: if all you can see is the odd 10-minute gap, use that. Depending on what your current needs are, your self care could simply involve closing your eyes and breathing deeply for a few minutes to relax.
While we’re on the subject of time, let’s talk about priorities. When we feel like we don’t have time to do something important, it’s either because we’re not making time, or because our priorities are out of alignment with what we actually need. Everything we do with our time is a choice. It might feel like we ‘have’ to do certain things, but, in reality, we have complete control over how we spend our time.
You can fit self care into your schedule, no matter how busy you are, by deciding it is a priority. Whether this means making it the first thing you do each morning, forgoing TV or Facebook time, saying ‘no’ to certain commitments, or potentially displeasing others, you can fit self care into your weekly routine if you prioritise.
4. Be assertive about setting your boundaries
When you start deliberately taking time for yourself and saying ‘no’ to commitments and requests, you might experience resistance from people around you. This can be emotionally challenging, especially if you’re not used to saying ‘no’ or placing your preferences above other people’s. If you’re faced with this kind of resistance, you need to be assertive about your needs and boundaries.
When you start setting down boundaries about what you are and aren’t willing to do, it can be hard to stand your ground in the face of push-back from those around you. Remember: you can take half an hour for yourself, and the world will still be there when you return. And when you do return, you’ll be in a much better, healthier position to deal with the world around you.
Self care is not a luxury. It’s not selfish and it’s not indulgent. Self care is absolutely necessary to your physical and mental health.
5. Focus on little and often
Like exercise, meditation, learning, and other beneficial activities, self care is far more effective when you engage with it little and often, as opposed to big chunks every now and again. Practising some kind of self care activity that takes 10-15 minutes a day is far more helpful than one that takes two hours once a month.
As well as the simple deep breathing exercise I mentioned above, other quick self care practices include meditation, short yoga routines, journaling, dancing around the room to a track of your choice, leaving uplifting quotes around your home or office for when you’ll most need them, creating a set of affirmations, or finding a change of scene.
Self care doesn’t have to involve a lot of money, nor does it require a lot of time. If you’re struggling to fit self care into your routine, start small, prioritise, and listen to what you need.
What are your tips for creating a regular self care practice when you’re stretched for time? Leave a comment and let us know.