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9 Ways Successful People Deal With Anger

9 Ways Successful People Deal With Anger

Conventional wisdom teaches us that anger is uncivilized, unsophisticated and socially unacceptable. Its stigma is hard to escape. If you’ve ever been guilty of an ‘outburst’ at work, on the sporting field or even worse, at your child’s soccer match, it’s likely that you’ve built yourself a reputation as someone who can’t control their emotions, even if it was out of character.

However, a research conducted by Henry Evans and Colm Foster, authors of “Step Up: Lead in Six Moments That Matter” and experts in the field of emotional intelligence showed that high-performers experience and harness their full spectrum of emotions, including anger to find success and achieve their objectives.

By harnessing the positive powers of anger, successful people are more focussed, more assertive and more confident. Successful people deal with anger by cultivating a high emotional IQ through success-breeding habits, routines and practices like these.

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In Their Head:

1. They accept that anger is natural and healthy

When you recognise anger as an essential and necessary emotion, you stop being afraid of it. Only when you’re no longer afraid of it can you start managing its manifestations.

Fear breeds defensive thoughts and behaviours, but when you embrace something, you put yourself in charge. Being in charge of your anger allows you to express it calmly and constructively.

2. They focus on ‘I’ statements

Most people experiencing anger talk in ‘you’ statements like “you are making me late” or “you still haven’t finished the report that was due this morning.” This type of language naturally makes other people defensive and less likely to want to help you out.

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By talking in ‘I’ statements instead, the people you’re talking to are more likely to empathise and want to help. Talking in ‘I’ statements will also help you focus on how to fix the problem rather than just complaining that the problem exists. Try these instead: “I don’t like to be late, it reflects poorly on our team” and “I really need that report, is there anything I can do to help.”

3. They avoid negative self-talk

There’s nothing wrong with being self critical, but when your negative self-talk holds you back from personal, emotional and professional growth you need to act.

When you embrace your imperfections you’re more likely to think about how to improve, rather than what’s ‘wrong’ with you, which over a long period of time, can lead to stress and depression. Take a more positive and constructive view of yourself and you’ll achieve more and be happier.

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At Work:

4. They focus on the problem, not the person

Hanlon’s Razor states: “never attribute to malice that which is adequately explained by stupidity.” In other words, if someone’s done wrong by you it’s likely they didn’t mean it so lighten up!

Accidents and mistakes happen everyday and while it’s easy to blame, getting angry at the person you believe responsible is not going to fix the problem. Stop wasting your time with un-constructive finger pointing and get on with business.

5. They don’t hold a grudge

Holding a grudge doesn’t achieve anything. Moreover, it takes energy and effort to hold something against someone which over time, wears you down and contaminates your mind, leading to a negative world view. Let it go. Forgive and forget and be happier.

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6. They never send an email while angry

The way you communicate with people at work can impact your future career prospects, and email is a permanent record of your communication with the potential to make or break a career. Anger impairs your judgement, which can lead you to write something in an email that you wouldn’t when you’re in a better frame of mind.

If you need to write something, draft an email with an empty ‘To:’ field, save the email as a draft and look at it again tomorrow. Also, checkout number 9 on this list.

At Home:

7. They meditate

Meditation can help you deal with stress and anxiety which are precursors to anger. Regular meditation regulates levels of cortisol, a hormone released during times of stress. It also boosts serotonin, a so-called ‘feel good’ hormone that balances your emotions and can make you more aware of your feelings.

8. They exercise

It’s widely recognised that regular exercise boosts energy levels and aids focus. Researchers have also found that it can help you manage your anger. Studies have shown that regular exercise dissipates feelings of anger and reduces the risk of it bubbling to the surface. So, get running.

9. They keep a journal

Keeping a journal is an alternative and healthy outlet for your emotions, including anger. A journal is a great place to get your thoughts, feelings, ideas and emotions out without the risk of hurting anyone and without fear of judgement.

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Last Updated on September 18, 2019

15 Best Organizing Tips For Office Organization and Getting More Done

15 Best Organizing Tips For Office Organization and Getting More Done

You may think that you don’t have time for office organization, but if you really knew how much time that disorganization cost you, you’d reconsider.

Rearranging and moving piles occasionally doesn’t count. Neither does clearing off your desk, if you swipe the mess into a bin, or a desk drawer.

A relatively neat and orderly office space clears the way for higher productivity and less wasted time.

Organizing your office doesn’t have to take days, it can be done a little at a time. In fact, maintaining an organized office is much more effective if you treat it like an on-going project, instead of a massive assault.

So, if you’re ready to get started, the following organizing tips will help you transform your office into an efficient workspace.

1. Purge Your Office

De-clutter, empty, shred, get rid of everything that you don’t need or want. Look around. What haven’t you used in a while?

Take one area at a time. If it doesn’t work, send it out for repair or toss it. If you haven’t used it in months and can’t think of when you’ll actually need it, out it goes. This goes for furniture, equipment, supplies, etc.

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Don’t forget about knick-knacks, plants (real or artificial), and decorations – if they’re covered with dust and make your office look shabby, they’re fair game.

2. Gather and Redistribute

Gather up every item that isn’t where it belongs and put it where it does.

3. Establish Work “Zones”

Decide what type of activity happens in each area of your office. You’ll probably have a main workspace (most likely your desk,) a reference area (filing cabinet, shelves, binders,) and a supply area (closet, shelves or drawers.)

Place the appropriate equipment and supplies are located in the proper area as much as possible.

4. Close Proximity

Position the equipment and supplies that you use most within reach. Things that you rarely use can be stored or put away.

5. Get a Good Labeler

Choose a label maker that’s simple to use. Take the time to label shelves, bins, baskets drawers. Not only will it remind you where things go, but it will also help others who may have a need to find, use, or put away anything in your workspace.

6. Revise Your Filing System

As we move fully into the digital age, the need to store paper files has decreased.

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What can your store digitally? Are you duplicating files? You may be able to eliminate some of the files and folders you’ve used in the past. If you’re storing files on your computer, make sure you are doing regular back-ups.

Here’re some storage ideas for creating a smooth filing system:

  • Create a meeting folder – Put all “items to be discussed” in there along with items that need to be handed off, reports that need to be given, etc. It’ll help you be prepared for meetings and save you stress in the even that a meeting is moved up.
  • Create a WOR folder – So much of our messy papers are things that are on hold until someone else responds or acts. Corral them in a WOR (Waiting on Response) folder. Check it every few days for outstanding actions you may need to follow-up on.
  • Storage boxes – Use inexpensive storage boxes to keep archived files and get them out of your current file space.
  • Magazine boxes – Use magazine boxes or binders to store magazines and catalogs you really want to store. Please make sure you really need them for reference or research, otherwise recycle them, or give away.
  • Reading folder – Designate a file for print articles and documents you want to read that aren’t urgent.
  • Archive files – When a project is complete, put all of the materials together and file them away. Keep your “working folders” for projects in progress.
  • File weekly – Don’t let your filing pile up. Put your papers in a “To File” folder and file everything once a week.

Learn more tips on organizing your files here: How to Organize Your Files for Better Productivity

7. Clear off Your Desk

Remove everything, clean it thoroughly and put back only those items that are essential for daily use.

If you have difficulty declutter stuff, this Declutter Formula will help you throw away stuff without regretting later.

8. Organize your Desktop

Now that you’ve streamlined your desktop, it’s a good idea to organize it.

Use desktop organizers or containers to organize the items on your desk. Use trays for papers, containers for smaller items.

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Don’t forget your computer desktop! Make sure the files or images are all in organized folders. I’d recommend you clear your computer desktop everyday before you leave work.

9. Organize Your Drawers

Put items used together in the same drawer space, stamps with envelopes, sticky pads with notepads, etc.

Use drawer organizers for little items – paper clips, tacks, etc. Use a separate drawer for personal items.

10. Separate Inboxes

If you work regularly with other people, create a folder, tray, or inbox for each.

11. Clear Your Piles

Hopefully with your new organized office, you won’t create piles of paper anymore, but you still have to sort through the old ones.

Go through the pile (a little at a time if necessary) and put it in the appropriate place or dump it.

12. Sort Mails

Don’t just stick mail in a pile to be sorted or rifle through and take out the pieces you need right now. Sort it as soon as you get it – To act, To read, To file, To delegate or hand off. .

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13. Assign Discard Dates

You don’t need to keep every piece of paper indefinitely. Mark on files or documents when they can be tossed or shredded.

Some legal or financial documents must be kept for specified length of time. Make sure you know what those requirements are.

14. Filter Your Emails

Some emails are important to read, others are just not that important.

When you use the filter system to label different types of emails, you know their priority and which to reply first.

Take a look at these tips to achieve inbox zero: The Ultimate Way to get to Inbox Zero

15. Straighten Your Desk

At the end of the day, do a quick straighten, so you have a clean start the next day.

Bottom Line

Use one tip or try them all. The amount of effort you put into creating and maintaining an efficient work area will pay off in a big way.

Instead of spending time looking for things and shuffling piles, you’ll be able to spend your time…well…working and you’ll enjoy being clutter free!

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Featured photo credit: Alesia Kazantceva via unsplash.com

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