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13 Ways Successful People Deal With Toxic Persons

13 Ways Successful People Deal With Toxic Persons

Among friends, family and co-workers, there are those whose attitudes can be demeaning and toxic. It is difficult relating to some of these people and thus it becomes a challenge. So how do we get out from the hole and be masters of our own fates?

The best way is to learn from successful people how they have approached the same role of winning the war against toxic individuals.

1. They set limits

Toxic persons try to consume you and make you swim deep in their problems. They don’t want to see solutions so they can waste your time by pressuring you to join their pity party.

Successful people understand that there is a fine line between offering to listen to the problems and getting themselves involved too deep in the negative emotional twists of such complainers. That is why they set limits and distance themselves when necessary.

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2. They don’t expect or request change

By expecting change, you lower your energy and create a resistance in people. Successful people do not want to be faced with a tone of disapproval, blame or rejection by a toxic person. So they simply suggest feedback and let them decide what they will do with it. They don’t demand actions or instant change.

3. They don’t get embroiled in fights

Successful people know how important it is to store energy. And when it comes to battling with a toxic person, they do well to manage their emotions.

By managing their emotions they can live to fight another day and avoid being brutally beaten. They choose their battles wisely and always pick the right time to be engaged in a fight.

4. They don’t allow anyone to restrict their happiness

Successful people do not allow other people’s opinions to determine their joy. They are masters of their own happiness.

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And so, anything that is successfully accomplished and needs to be celebrated cannot be affected by what toxic persons are thinking or doing.

5. They don’t forget

By not forgetting what a wrongdoer has done to them, successful people can move on and focus on protecting themselves from future harm. It is not as if forgiveness doesn’t play a part to their success, but they simply do not want to be involved in the mistakes of others.

6. They forge a support system

Successful people understand that battling toxic persons alone can be exhausting. To avoid such nerve racking mental exercise, they surround themselves with people who are supportive and willing to help them during difficult situations.

7. They get some rest

They understand the need to stay positive, creative and proactive. And the way they can do this is by getting some sleep. With a well deserved rest, successful people can manage their stress levels and be recharged enough to deal effectively with toxic persons.

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8. They focus on solutions rather than problems

The best way to manage your emotional state is to fixate on the solutions of the problems you are facing. Successful people focus on personal development and improve their circumstances, thus their attitude produces positive emotions and reduces stress.

Instead of thinking or focusing on how crazy toxic persons can be, they think of how they can handle the situation toxic individuals have presented.

9. They set barriers

You can’t deal with everyone in the same way. That is why successful people establish boundaries to rise above the negative people around them. By doing this, they can predict the actions of toxic persons. This also equips them with knowing when to put up barriers with negative people and when not to.

10. They are self aware

By being self aware you are able to determine how far anyone can go before he or she pushes your buttons. Maintaining an emotional distance requires awareness. That is why successful people can manage situations, even when they are confronted by a derailed person. They smile, nod and move on.

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11. They rise above negativity

Everyone will agree that toxic persons are irrational and crazy. They cannot be reasoned with, so instead of trying to get muddled up in the mix, they focus on not responding to the frenzy and chaos, and respond only to the facts.

12. They never play the victim

While toxic persons can play the field to their advantage, you are left to decide whether play the victim or not. Successful people do not allow themselves to be victimized by their emotional state, and instead focus on owning up from within to whatever negativity that surrounds them.

13. They never judge

Successful people are not judgmental. They understand that this can become addictive if they make it a habit. That is why successful people focus on other elements, such as compassion, understanding, respect and forgiveness.

Featured photo credit: http://www.photopin.com via photopin.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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