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10 Ways To A Magnetic Leadership Style

10 Ways To A Magnetic Leadership Style

Leaders are not always born.  Strong leadership abilities come from the right amount of people skills and bold action.  To go beyond traditional leadership, you have to be willing to step away from the computer screen and be seen.

The greatest leaders know their product, clients, customers, and supporters.  They make their supporters feel like they care, and sometimes they actually do.  If you want to make your leadership shine, have others trust you, and follow you, you need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.  Here are 10 ways to do it.

1. Play with transparency.

Be open about any losses, gains, and what you are working on. Creating an environment built on too many secrets generates fear and rumors.  If there’s a problem, share it with your team and let them see that you don’t always have the answer.  This can be scary for someone who is always in control, but often the reverse happens, and you’ll gain more respect.

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2. Make them think it’s their idea.

People like to own stuff.  They don’t want to feel like they are working hard to make you richer, and smarter.  To increase your influence as a leader, make sure others have a stake in whatever they are working on.  Invite them to set the rules, parameters, the ins/outs, and you provide the space and creative freedom.  If you surround yourself with entrepreneurial-minded team members, you’ll find yourself doing less micro-management and more guidance.

3. Learn to ask the right questions.

Sometimes you won’t have the answers.  You don’t have to.  You can simply answer a question with a question.  The person will give you more information which will allow you to move forward.  Don’t ever come off as a know-it-all leader.  Keep others on their toes.  When you ask the right questions, you give yourself more time to think and respond proactively while letting others figure it out for you.

4. Stop looking busy and do something.

Get rid of the busy work.  A powerful leader is someone who looks good, has good habits, and is socially sophisticated.  Let others see you exhibiting the ideals you advocate; get active in your community, or join a local sports club or book club.

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5. Reward others often with really good perks.

Surprise your team with anything from a fully paid weekend excursion to bonuses.  Your supporters will want to work harder because there is an end-goal, and it isn’t just Friday or the weekend.  They actually get to see the value of the work they deliver.  The bigger the work, the bigger the rewards they should enjoy.

6. Practice shutting your mouth.

Many leaders are comfortable at the podium, speaking to a large group, and talking with their hands.  This animated version is not always necessary.  Learning to listen is probably the most powerful form of communication. If you learn to listen to what others are not saying, you will be able to give them what they don’t know they want. This can lead to your next mega idea or product.

7. Be a philanthropist or act like one.

This is one of the easiest, but most costly ways to increase your visibility and shine as a leader.  Is there a cause you are passionate about? If you can’t find one, start one.  Find a nonprofit you believe in, pump your resources into it, get on the Board, and make a difference in the lives of people you don’t know.  Philanthropy is a powerful way to help others, while you get exposure for good work.

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8. Learn to surprise others and keep them interested.

To keep the interest of those you support, a leader must learn how to stay in control.  It’s easy to get stuck in default mode and be predictable.  A team needs to know that they are following someone who is capable of anything, fearless and unafraid to take the road less traveled.

9. Spend time with the right people.

A leader doesn’t have a lot of time.  Find the relationships that matter most for your professional goals.  Cultivate them with meaningful correspondence, face-to-face meetings, and informal niceties.  Find out how you can help your contacts before they can help you.

10. Increase your value and you will be indispensable.

Develop a new idea, product or strategy that you can teach others.  Make sure it is your own successfully proven technique.  Share it generously with a chosen few to solidify your position as the source of this great new idea.  It will be difficult to replace you. Others will come to you to learn, which will increase their confidence and lead them to become your evangelists.

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Featured photo credit: photopin via

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Invaluable Lessons You Can Learn From Your Mistakes

Do you like making mistakes?

I certainly don’t.

Making mistakes is inevitable. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we could be at ease with them?

Perhaps there is a way to think of them differently and see their benefits.

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Why Mistakes Feel Dangerous

Mistakes often feel dangerous. Throughout human history, our errors have often been treated as dangerous for a variety of reasons:

  • Our vulnerability. We have limited and fragile support systems. When those systems fail, people often lose their lives.
  • Real dangers. Nature can be dangerous, and making mistakes can put us at the mercy of nature and its animal residents seeking a meal.
  • Ignorance. Many cultures scapegoats someone whenever there is a failure of some kind. Scapegoating can be serious and deadly.
  • Order. Many societies punish those who do not conform to the prevailing orthodoxy and treat difference and non-conformity as a mistake. Even our brains flash an error message whenever we go against prevailing social norms.

We have a history of handling mistakes and failure in an unpleasant way. Since each of us carries our human history with us, it can be a challenge to overcome the fear of making mistakes.

If we can embrace the reality of mistakes, we can free ourselves to be more creative in our lives and dig up some interesting insights.

Why We Can’t Avoid Making Mistakes

Many people operate under the notion that making mistakes is an aberration, a mistake if you will. You can call it perfectionism but it is a more substantial problem. It is really a demand for order and continuity.

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When we think we can eliminate mistakes, we are often working from a perspective that sees the world as a fixed place. The world, however, is not so obliging. Like it or not, the world, and everything in it, is constantly changing.

Change is more constant and pervasive than we can see with our own eyes which is why we often miss it. Our bodies are constantly changing. The natural conditions of the earth change constantly as well. Everything, including economic and cultural systems have life cycles. Everything is in a constant state of flux.

We cannot see all of the changes going on around us since rates of change vary. Unfortunately, when we try to create a feeling of certainty and solidity in our lives or operate from the illusion of stability and order, we are fighting reality and our natural evolution which is built on adapting to change.

It is better to continually bend into this reality rather than fight every change we experience. Fighting it can cause us to make more mistakes. Finding the benefits in change can be useful and help us minimize unnecessary mistakes.

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Lessons Learned from Making Mistakes

Life has so many uncertainties and variables that mistakes are inevitable. Fortunately, there are many things you can learn from making mistakes.

Here is a list of ways to harness the mistakes you make for your benefit.

  1. Point us to something we did not know.
  2. Reveal a nuance we missed.
  3. Deepen our knowledge.
  4. Tell us something about our skill levels.
  5. Help us see what matters and what does not.
  6. Inform us more about our values.
  7. Teach us more about others.
  8. Let us recognize changing circumstances.
  9. Show us when someone else has changed.
  10. Keep us connected to what works and what doesn’t work.
  11. Remind us of our humanity.
  12. Spur us to want to better work which helps us all.
  13. Promote compassion for ourselves and others.
  14. Teach us to value forgiveness.
  15. Help us to pace ourselves better.
  16. Invite us to better choices.
  17. Can teach us how to experiment.
  18. Can reveal a new insight.
  19. Can suggest new options we had not considered.
  20. Can serve as a warning.
  21. Show us hidden fault lines in our lives which can lead us to more productive arrangements.
  22. Point out structural problems in our lives.
  23. Prompt us to learn more about ourselves.
  24. Remind us how we are like others.
  25. Make us more humble.
  26. Help us rectify injustices in our lives.
  27. Show us where to create more balance in our lives.
  28. Tell us when the time to move on has occurred.
  29. Reveal where our passion is and where it is not.
  30. Expose our true feelings.
  31. Bring out problems in a relationship.
  32. Can be a red flag for our misjudgments.
  33. Point us in a more creative direction.
  34. Show us when we are not listening.
  35. Wake us up to our authentic selves.
  36. Can create distance with someone else.
  37. Slow us down when we need to.
  38. Can hasten change.
  39. Reveal our blind spots.
  40. Are the invisible made visible.

Reframe Reality to Handle Mistakes More Easily

The secret to handling mistakes is to:

  • Expect them as part of the process of growth and development.
  • Have an experimental mindset.
  • Think in evolutional rather than fixed terms.

When we accept change as the natural structure of the world, our vulnerability and humanness lets us work with the ebb and flow of life.

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When we recognize the inevitability of mistakes as part of the ongoing experiment which life is, then we can relax more. In doing so we may make fewer of them.

It also helps to keep in mind that trial and error is an organic natural way of living. It is how we have evolved over time. It is better to be with our natural evolution than to fight it and make life harder.

When we adopt an evolutional mindset and see ourselves as part of the ongoing human experiment, we can appreciate that all that has been built up over time which includes the many mistakes our ancestors have made over thousands of years. Each one of us today is a part of that human tradition of learning and experimenting,

Mistakes are part of the trial and error, experimental nature of life. The more you adopt the experimental, evolutional frame, the easier it becomes to handle mistakes.

Handling mistakes well can help you relax and enjoy all aspects of life more.

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Featured photo credit: Sarah Kilian via unsplash.com

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