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10 Books Which Can Effectively Increase Our Emotional Quotient

10 Books Which Can Effectively Increase Our Emotional Quotient
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People pay a lot of attention to the intelligence quotient, or IQ, which can be a determinant for a successful career. Nevertheless, this score does not reflect the overall intelligence of a particular person. Emotional intelligence is just as important for maintaining successful relationships, working in teams, and adapting to different social and business environments.

Fortunately, there are proven strategies that help people boost their emotional know-how. What’s the best place to start? There are plenty of popular books focused on this matter. You should start by learning the fundamentals of the emotional intelligence concept. Once you have a solid base of emotional education, you will notice how your life is improved from different points of view.

Mark the following 10 books as “to read”; they offer great tips that will help you increase your EQ.

1. Go Suck a Lemon: Strategies for Improving Your Emotional Intelligence – Michael Cornwall

1. Go Suck a Lemon: Strategies for Improving Your Emotional Intelligence by Michael Cornwall

    This author wrote an amazing guide that helps people improve their emotional intelligence through practical exercises. Dr. Cornwall suggests that the process of boosting your EQ starts with commitment to self-development, as well as a complete transformation of the way you think and behave. Emotionally healthy people think before reacting. They are open-minded and independent. This book teaches you how to achieve that state.

    2. Emotional Intelligence 2.0 – Travis Bradberry, Patrick Lencioni and Jean Greaves

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    2. Emotional Intelligence 2.0 by Travis Bradberry, Patrick Lencioni and Jean Greaves

      Bradberry, Lencioni and Greaves associate emotional intelligence with today’s stressful economic conditions and demanding workplaces. They suggest several tools that help people adapt to such environments and channel the negative emotions that result from them.

      The biggest advantage of this book is the program that enables people to boost their emotional wellbeing by following clear steps focused on foundational skills: social awareness, self-awareness, relationship management, and self-management.

      3. Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ – Daniel Goleman

      3.	Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ

        Dr. Goleman offers a direct face-off between EQ and IQ, explaining that intellectual intelligence doesn’t help us achieve self-improvement without the boost of a high EQ. Supporting his arguments with facts from neuroscience and psychology, the author helps us understand the crucial skills for success.

        The book is not abstract at all; Goleman also offers ideas on how people can improve their EQ, which will lead to better relationships, work performance, and physical well-being.

        4. The EQ Difference: A Powerful Plan for Putting Emotional Intelligence to Work – Adele B. Lynn

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        4.	The EQ Difference: A Powerful Plan for Putting Emotional Intelligence to Work

          You can find tons of information on emotional intelligence online. However, many of those articles are based on abstract terms that may help you to understand the concept of emotional wellbeing, but won’t help you actually to achieve it. That’s why it’s important to find a more elaborate book that guides you through the specific steps you can take towards your personal growth.

          Adele B. Lynn provides effective guidance for professionals at all levels. Her practical examples and tips help the readers understand the effects different emotions have on our values, relations, and performance in the workplace. Once you learn how to recognize those effects, you will be able to achieve greater professional success.

          5. The EQ Edge: Emotional Intelligence and Your Success – Steven J. Stein and Howard E. Book

          5.	The EQ Edge: Emotional Intelligence and Your Success

            This book may easily become your long-term companion. Highly-developed intellect and creativity are truly necessary for successful performance on multiple levels, but the role of emotional intelligence is just as powerful. The EQ Edge teaches us why EQ is of crucial meaning when people are trying to progress at work, strengthen their relationships, boost their confidence, and become leaders.

            The book also includes a practical guide that enables all of us to improve relationships with other people, but with ourselves as well.

            6. The New Psycho-Cybernetics – Maxwell Maltz

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            6.	The New Psycho-Cybernetics

              This is an updated version of the influential book that Maxwell Maltz published in 1960. The concept of emotional intelligence is nothing new; people have been aware of its importance throughout the last century. The theory of psycho-cybernetics examines the process of controlling thoughts and emotions. This book will teach you how to transform them from negative to positive.

              With time, you will reprogram the way your mind processes information. That will enable you to achieve your career goals and improve your overall lifestyle.

              7. Building Emotional Intelligence – Linda Lantieri

              7.	Building Emotional Intelligence by Linda Lantieri

                If you are a parent, it’s important to help your children develop the foundations of EQ at an early age. The most important part of children’s development is not reading, science, or math. Rather, it’s the capacity that Linda Lantieri defines as inner resilience. The approach elaborated in this book can also be useful for adults interested in boosting their emotional intelligence.

                With the step-by-step guide, the author enables people to improve their focus and awareness, increase self-esteem and empathy, and improve their ability for effective communication.

                8. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change – Stephen R. Covey

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                8.	The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change by Stephen R. Covey

                  This author presents a holistic approach for solving professional and personal problems. Although the book isn’t focused on emotional intelligence per se, it is an essential guide for everyone who wants to gain control over their emotions. Many of the 7 habits of effective people are closely linked to awareness of their inner state. Through anecdotes and penetrating insights, Covey teaches people how to live with integrity, dignity, and fairness.

                  9. The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book – Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

                  The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book by Travis Bradberry and Jean Greaves

                    This is one of the most accessible guides for achieving higher EQ. The authors of the book are renowned researchers of the phenomenon of emotional intelligence. In The Emotional Intelligence Quick Book, they offer effective tools that help people bring their chaotic personal and professional lives to balance.

                    This edition may seem short for such a deep concept, but it’s very effective because it gets straight to the point. It will help you assess your own EQ and build your “emotional immunity” at home and at work.

                    10. The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships – Jeanne Segal

                    The Language of Emotional Intelligence: The Five Essential Tools for Building Powerful and Effective Relationships

                      This author doesn’t spend much time trying to convince you how important emotional intelligence is for the wellbeing of your relationships; you are supposed to know that already. The value of this book is in the fact that it enables you to apply the things you know in your everyday life. Jeanne Segal offers a practical guide based on research and real-life examples.

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                      The five basic tools elaborated in the book will help you enhance your relationships by improving your skills at diffusing arguments and conflicts, reading non-verbal signs, and boosting your capacity for clear communication.

                      Featured photo credit: Moyan Brenn via flickr.com

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                      Last Updated on July 21, 2021

                      The Importance of Reminders (And How to Make a Reminder Work)

                      The Importance of Reminders (And How to Make a Reminder Work)
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                      No matter how well you set up your todo list and calendar, you aren’t going to get things done unless you have a reliable way of reminding yourself to actually do them.

                      Anyone who’s spent an hour writing up the perfect grocery list only to realize at the store that they forgot to bring the list understands the importance of reminders.

                      Reminders of some sort or another are what turn a collection of paper goods or web services into what David Allen calls a “trusted system.”[1]

                      A lot of people resist getting better organized. No matter what kind of chaotic mess, their lives are on a day-to-day basis because they know themselves well enough to know that there’s after all that work they’ll probably forget to take their lists with them when it matters most.

                      Fortunately, there are ways to make sure we remember to check our lists — and to remember to do the things we need to do, whether they’re on a list or not.

                      In most cases, we need a lot of pushing at first, for example by making a reminder, but eventually we build up enough momentum that doing what needs doing becomes a habit — not an exception.

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                      From Creating Reminders to Building Habits

                      A habit is any act we engage in automatically without thinking about it.

                      For example, when you brush your teeth, you don’t have to think about every single step from start to finish; once you stagger up to the sink, habit takes over (and, really, habit got you to the sink in the first place) and you find yourself putting toothpaste on your toothbrush, putting the toothbrush in your mouth (and never your ear!), spitting, rinsing, and so on without any conscious effort at all.

                      This is a good thing because if you’re anything like me, you’re not even capable of conscious thought when you’re brushing your teeth.

                      The good news is you already have a whole set of productivity habits you’ve built up over the course of your life. The bad news is, a lot of them aren’t very good habits.

                      That quick game Frogger to “loosen you up” before you get working, that always ends up being 6 hours of Frogger –– that’s a habit. And as you know, habits like that can be hard to break — which is one of the reasons why habits are so important in the first place.

                      Once you’ve replaced an unproductive habit with a more productive one, the new habit will be just as hard to break as the old one was. Getting there, though, can be a chore!

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                      The old saw about anything you do for 21 days becoming a habit has been pretty much discredited, but there is a kernel of truth there — anything you do long enough becomes an ingrained behavior, a habit. Some people pick up habits quickly, others over a longer time span, but eventually, the behaviors become automatic.

                      Building productive habits, then, is a matter of repeating a desired behavior over a long enough period of time that you start doing it without thinking.

                      But how do you remember to do that? And what about the things that don’t need to be habits — the one-off events, like taking your paycheck stubs to your mortgage banker or making a particular phone call?

                      The trick to reminding yourself often enough for something to become a habit, or just that one time that you need to do something, is to interrupt yourself in some way in a way that triggers the desired behavior.

                      The Wonderful Thing About Triggers — Reminders

                      A trigger is anything that you put “in your way” to remind you to do something. The best triggers are related in some way to the behavior you want to produce.

                      For instance, if you want to remember to take something to work that you wouldn’t normally take, you might place it in front of the door so you have to pick it up to get out of your house.

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                      But anything that catches your attention and reminds you to do something can be a trigger. An alarm clock or kitchen timer is a perfect example — when the bell rings, you know to wake up or take the quiche out of the oven. (Hopefully you remember which trigger goes with which behavior!)

                      If you want to instill a habit, the thing to do is to place a trigger in your path to remind you to do whatever it is you’re trying to make into a habit — and keep it there until you realize that you’ve already done the thing it’s supposed to remind you of.

                      For instance, a post-it saying “count your calories” placed on the refrigerator door (or maybe on your favorite sugary snack itself)  can help you remember that you’re supposed to be cutting back — until one day you realize that you don’t need to be reminded anymore.

                      These triggers all require a lot of forethought, though — you have to remember that you need to remember something in the first place.

                      For a lot of tasks, the best reminder is one that’s completely automated — you set it up and then forget about it, trusting the trigger to pop up when you need it.

                      How to Make a Reminder Works for You

                      Computers and ubiquity of mobile Internet-connected devices make it possible to set up automatic triggers for just about anything.

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                      Desktop software like Outlook will pop up reminders on your desktop screen, and most online services go an extra step and send reminders via email or SMS text message — just the thing to keep you on track. Sandy, for example, just does automatic reminders.

                      Automated reminders can help you build habits — but it can also help you remember things that are too important to be trusted even to habit. Diabetics who need to take their insulin, HIV patients whose medication must be taken at an exact time in a precise order, phone calls that have to be made exactly on time, and other crucial events require triggers even when the habit is already in place.

                      My advice is to set reminders for just about everything — have them sent to your mobile phone in some way (either through a built-in calendar or an online service that sends updates) so you never have to think about it — and never have to worry about forgetting.

                      Your weekly review is a good time to enter new reminders for the coming weeks or months. I simply don’t want to think about what I’m supposed to be doing; I want to be reminded so I can think just about actually doing it.

                      I tend to use my calendar for reminders, mostly, though I do like Sandy quite a bit.

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                      Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

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                      Reference

                      [1] Getting Things Done: Trusted System

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