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If You’re In Burnout, You Surely Need These Tips

If You’re In Burnout, You Surely Need These Tips

As a busy entrepreneur or professional, you are likely to face burnout at one time or another.

Overwhelm or burnout is a common obstacle that most of us face when building a business, getting things done or reaching for our goals. The more we put on our plate, the heavier it becomes, and it makes it that much more difficult to deal with at times.

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Eventually you hit a wall and you get burnt out. If that’s how you feel right now, these tips are sure to help you break through this plateau and move forward.

1. Slow down

When we’re chasing goal after goal, it’s easy to get caught in a rat race. Once you start feeling that nagging sense of overwhelm come over you, try to stop, breathe, and just slow down. Take it step by step, don’t try doing it all at once.

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2. Review your progress so far to realize how much your work is contributing to the goals

A lot of times when we are burned out, we lose sight of the bigger vision and our goals. We go through the day-to-day tasks and check things off a list without really thinking about how they are affecting our progress toward a bigger purpose. If your main goal is to get your website up and running, spending time on writing your blog posts or guest posts is probably not contributing to that bigger goal. Sure, it is important to do those things but they have to be done in the order that makes sense. Writing blog posts doesn’t help you if your website is still not up and these blog posts have nowhere to live! Focus on the brand strategy and working with your web designer instead. Step by step, in the right order.

3. Speak to people who have done it before

Whenever you feel overwhelmed you might start realizing that some nasty thoughts begin running through your mind. Perhaps you don’t think you’ve got it in you. Perhaps you’re not quite sure what to do next. If this sounds true for you, talking to someone who has been there before will help. Find a mentor that has gone through the process before to help guide you through it. If you’re struggling with your marketing or business plan, consider hiring a business coach (that’s me!) or strategist. You don’t have to go at it alone.

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4. Take many small steps

Once you’ve slowed down and got your plan written out for your vision, start taking small steps. Don’t bite off a bigger piece than you can chew – slow down and divide the milestone goals into smaller goals. From there, break them down even further. Checking things off more frequently will get you the momentum you need to continue moving in the right direction.

5. Focus on the bigger vision

Again, if you’re doing something ambiguous, ask yourself how that task is contributing to the bigger vision. Better yet, ask yourself “What IS the vision anyway?” – allow yourself to daydream a little bit. This is something you can do with a coach as well as they know exactly the right questions to ask that are inquisitive but also extremely motivating. Just revising that vision is a great first step to gaining momentum once again.

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6. Do a brain dump

If you have so much going on in your head that you don’t even know where to start, I recommend doing a brain dump. Simply take a piece of paper and start writing. Write everything that’s in your head, every single thing that comes into your mind. After a couple of minutes (or hours) you’ll have dumped it all on paper and you’ll feel more clear-headed and ready to pick and choose the activities that make the most sense for you at that moment.

7. Prioritize your goals to gain momentum

When you have your biggest vision in mind with a written goal in mind, make sure your milestones and smaller goals are prioritized well. If you know you really have to get your marketing plan ready but you really despise marketing, think whether there are any other things you can do right now instead that will also move you forward. Do what feels better first so then that feeling of momentum will expand into the other areas you have to focus on eventually as well.

Featured photo credit: puck90 via flickr.com

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Last Updated on July 10, 2020

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

How to Take Control of Your Life with Better Boundaries

We all have them—those hurtful, frustrating, offensive, manipulative people in our lives. No matter how hard we try to surround ourselves with positive and kind people, there will always be those who will disrespect, insult, berate, and misuse you if we allow them to.

We may, for a variety of reasons, not be able to avoid them, but we can determine how we interact with them and how we allow them to interact with us.

So, how to take control of your life and stop being pushed around?

Learning to set clear firm boundaries with the people in our lives at work and in our personal lives is the best way to protect ourselves from the negative effects of this kind of behavior.

What Boundaries Are (And What They’re Not)

Boundaries are limits

—they are not threats or ultimatums. Boundaries inform or teach. They are not a form of punishment.

Boundaries are firm lines—determined by you—which cannot be crossed by those around you. They are guidelines for how you will allow others to treat you and what kind of behaviors you will expect.

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Healthy personal boundaries help protect you from physical or emotional pain. You may also need to set firm boundaries at work to ensure you and your time are not disrespected. Don’t allow others to take advantage of your kindness and generosity.

Clear boundaries communicate to others that you demand respect and consideration—that you are willing to stand up for yourself and that you will not be a doormat for anyone. They are a “no trespassing” sign that makes it very clear when a line has been crossed and that there will be consequences for doing so.

Boundaries are not set with the intention of changing other people. They may change how people interact with you, but they are more about enforcing your needs than attempting to change the general behavior and attitude of others.

How to Establish Boundaries and Take Control of Your Life

Here are some ways that you can establish boundaries and take control of your life.

1. Self-Awareness Comes First

Before you can establish boundaries with others, you first need to understand what your needs are.

You are entitled to respect. You have the right to protect yourself from inappropriate or offensive behavior. Setting boundaries is a way of honoring your needs.

To set appropriate boundaries, you need to be clear about what healthy behaviors look like—what healthy relationships look like.

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You first have to become more aware of your feelings and honest with yourself about your expectations and what you feel is appropriate behavior:

  • Where do you need to establish better boundaries?
  • When do you feel disrespected?
  • When do you feel violated, frustrated, or angered by the behavior of others?
  • In what situations do you feel you are being mistreated or taken advantage of?
  • When do you want to be alone?
  • How much space do you need?

You need to honor your own needs and boundaries before you can expect others to honor them. This allows you to take control of your life.

2. Clear Communication Is Essential

Inform others clearly and directly what your expectations are. It is essential to have clear communication if you want others to respect your boundaries. Explain in an honest and respectful tone what you find offensive or unacceptable.

Many people simply aren’t aware that they are behaving inappropriately. They may never have been taught proper manners or consideration for others.

3. Be Specific but Don’t Blame

Taking a blaming or punishing attitude automatically puts people on the defensive. People will not listen when they feel attacked. It’s part of human nature.

That said, you do not need to overexplain or defend yourself. Boundaries are not open to compromise.

Sample language:

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  • “You may not…yell or raise your voice to me…”
  • “I need…to be treated with respect…”
  • “It’s not okay when…you take things from my desk without asking…”
  • “I won’t…do your work…cover for you anymore…”
  • “It’s not acceptable when…you ridicule or insult me…”
  • “I am uncomfortable when…you use offensive language”
  • “I will no longer be able to…lend you money…”

Being able to communicate these without sounding accusatory is essential if you want others to respect your boundaries so you can take control of your life.

4. Consequences Are Often Necessary

Determine what the appropriate consequences will be when boundaries are crossed. If it’s appropriate, be clear about those consequences upfront when communicating those boundaries to others.

Follow through. People won’t respect your boundaries if you don’t enforce them.

Standing our ground and forcing consequences doesn’t come easily to us. We want to be nice. We want people to like us, but we shouldn’t have to trade our self-respect to gain friends or to achieve success.

We may be tempted to let minor disrespect slide to avoid conflict, but as the familiar saying goes, “if you give people an inch, they’ll take a mile.”

It’s much easier to address offensive or inappropriate behavior now than to wait until that behavior has gotten completely out of hand.

It’s also important to remember that positive reinforcement is even more powerful than negative consequences. When people do alter the way they treat you, acknowledge it. Let people know that you notice and appreciate their efforts.

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Final Thoughts

Respect is always a valid reason for setting a boundary. Don’t defend yourself or your needs. Boundaries are often necessary to protect your time, your space, and your feelings. And these are essential if you want to take control of your life.

Start with the easiest boundaries first. Setting boundaries is a skill that needs to be practiced. Enlist support from others if necessary. Inform people immediately when they have crossed the line.

Don’t wait. Communicate politely and directly. Be clear about the consequences and follow them through.

The better you become at setting your own boundaries, the better you become at recognizing and respecting the boundaries of others.

Remember that establishing boundaries is your right. You are entitled to respect. You can’t control how other people behave, but you do have control over the way you allow people to treat you.

Learning to set boundaries is not always easy, but with time, it will become more comfortable. You may eventually find that boundaries become automatic and you no longer need to consciously set them.

They will simply become a natural extension of your self-respect.

Featured photo credit: Thomas Kelley via unsplash.com

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