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Are You Giving Away Your Personal Power?

Are You Giving Away Your Personal Power?

Some people see themselves in the drivers seat of their lives and others feel they are in the passenger seat. Stop being frustrated with how your life is going and take your personal power back.

No matter why you may think you are in the passenger seat you can take back your personal power. The first step is recognizing where you are giving it away. We’re going to explore 3 ways you may be giving your personal power away below.

Personal Power Blocker: Self-talk

The first way we give away our personal power is in the way that we talk to ourselves. Do you recognize some of the statements below? If so, you are giving away your personal power just by the way you talk to yourself.

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  • They never let me…
  • Xyz was doing it, so I couldn’t…
  • I don’t know how to…
  • I never get to do what I want to do
  • I can’t do it
  • It’s in my genes so I can’t…
  • I’m not smart enough…
  • I’m not pretty enough…
  • No one wants me…
  • It’s not fair
  • No one in my family ever xyz so I can’t either

When you hear yourself saying one of these statements stop and ask yoursel, “Is it really true?”. For example, let’s say you caught yourself with the thought, “I can’t get that promotion because…” Now, ask yourself if that statement is true.

Then ask how you would know if it were true. Have you tried to get the promotion? Have you looked at your resume and qualifications? Have you tried to demonstrate your knowledge, skill and effectiveness to your boss, co-workers and others who would give feedback and ultimately choose who was in line for a promotion? Most likely you haven’t done all you could to get the promotion.

There is much that we can control and impact with our personal power. Change your thinking and you will start to see what you can do rather than what you can’t do.

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Personal Power Blocker: Perceptions

Are you perceiving the world in a way that is giving away your personal power?

Below are a few ways perceptions might be blocking your personal power.

  • You feel like others control your life
  • You try to be like other people thinking that is the way to a better life
  • You feel someone is holding you back from reaching your full potential
  • You think there isn’t enough time to do xyz
  • You don’t have the support you need to be successfully (e.g. spouse or family support)

If you have any of these perceptions, you need to ask yourself if the perception is true or just a viewpoint.

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We choose how we perceive the world. It may not seem that way all the time but there are many viewpoints of an event. You can choose whether you see an event as good, bad, or indifferent.

Choose to see each event as an opportunity and the world will open up for you.

Personal Power Blocker: Action

How you might be giving away your personal power through action (or lack thereof):

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  • You wait for directions
  • You don’t set any goals – if you have no direction that is just where you will be: nowhere
  • You have trouble focusing – you try one thing but then give up and move to another before giving yourself ample time to be proficient
  • You resist change

If you are waiting for the world to bring you your golden ticket, it’s going to be a long wait. Successful people set goals and take steps to ensure their success. What are you doing to have a successful, happy, fulfilled life?

Take your personal power back by getting in the driver’s seat of your life. Get on the road and start making progress toward your goals.

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

How to Stay Calm and Cool When You Are Extremely Stressful

Being in a hurry all the time drains your energy. Your work and routine life make you feel overwhelmed. Getting caught up in things beyond your control stresses you out…

If you’d like to stay calm and cool in stressful situations, put the following 8 steps into practice:

1. Breathe

The next time you’re faced with a stressful situation that makes you want to hurry, stop what you’re doing for one minute and perform the following steps:

  • Take five deep breaths in and out (your belly should come forward with each inhale).
  • Imagine all that stress leaving your body with each exhale.
  • Smile. Fake it if you have to. It’s pretty hard to stay grumpy with a goofy grin on your face.

Feel free to repeat the above steps every few hours at work or home if you need to.

2. Loosen up

After your breathing session, perform a quick body scan to identify any areas that are tight or tense. Clenched jaw? Rounded shoulders? Anything else that isn’t at ease?

Gently touch or massage any of your body parts that are under tension to encourage total relaxation. It might help to imagine you’re in a place that calms you: a beach, hot tub, or nature trail, for example.

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3. Chew slowly

Slow down at the dinner table if you want to learn to be patient and lose weight. Shoveling your food down as fast as you can is a surefire way to eat more than you need to (and find yourself with a bellyache).

Be a mindful eater who pays attention to the taste, texture, and aroma of every dish. Chew slowly while you try to guess all of the ingredients that were used to prepare your dish.

Chewing slowly will also reduce those dreadful late-night cravings that sneak up on you after work.

4. Let go

Cliche as it sounds, it’s very effective.

The thing that seems like the end of the world right now?

It’s not. Promise.

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Stressing and worrying about the situation you’re in won’t do any good because you’re already in it, so just let it go.

Letting go isn’t easy, so here’s a guide to help you:

21 Things To Do When You Find It Hard To Let Go

5. Enjoy the journey

Focusing on the end result can quickly become exhausting. Chasing a bold, audacious goal that’s going to require a lot of time and patience? Split it into several mini-goals so you’ll have several causes for celebration.

Stop focusing on the negative thoughts. Giving yourself consistent positive feedback will help you grow patience, stay encouraged, and find more joy in the process of achieving your goals.

6. Look at the big picture

The next time you find your stress level skyrocketing, take a deep breath, and ask yourself:

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Will this matter to me…

  • Next week?
  • Next month?
  • Next year?
  • In 10 years?

Hint: No, it won’t.

I bet most of the stuff that stresses you wouldn’t matter the next week, maybe not even the next day.

Stop agonizing over things you can’t control because you’re only hurting yourself.

7. Stop demanding perfection of yourself

You’re not perfect and that’s okay. Show me a person who claims to be perfect and I’ll show you a dirty liar.

Demanding perfection of yourself (or anybody else) will only stress you out because it just isn’t possible.

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8. Practice patience every day

Below are a few easy ways you can practice patience every day, increasing your ability to remain calm and cool in times of stress:

  • The next time you go to the grocery store, get in the longest line.
  • Instead of going through the drive-thru at your bank, go inside.
  • Take a long walk through a secluded park or trail.

Final thoughts

Staying calm in stressful situations is possible, all you need is some daily practice.

Taking deep breaths and eat mindfully are some simple ways to train your brain to be more patient. But changing the way you think of a situation and staying positive are most important in keeping cool whenever you feel overwhelmed and stressful.

Featured photo credit: Brooke Cagle via unsplash.com

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