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Are You Giving Away Your Personal Power?

Are You Giving Away Your Personal Power?

Some people see themselves in the drivers seat of their lives and others feel they are in the passenger seat. Stop being frustrated with how your life is going and take your personal power back.

No matter why you may think you are in the passenger seat you can take back your personal power. The first step is recognizing where you are giving it away. We’re going to explore 3 ways you may be giving your personal power away below.

Personal Power Blocker: Self-talk

The first way we give away our personal power is in the way that we talk to ourselves. Do you recognize some of the statements below? If so, you are giving away your personal power just by the way you talk to yourself.

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  • They never let me…
  • Xyz was doing it, so I couldn’t…
  • I don’t know how to…
  • I never get to do what I want to do
  • I can’t do it
  • It’s in my genes so I can’t…
  • I’m not smart enough…
  • I’m not pretty enough…
  • No one wants me…
  • It’s not fair
  • No one in my family ever xyz so I can’t either

When you hear yourself saying one of these statements stop and ask yoursel, “Is it really true?”. For example, let’s say you caught yourself with the thought, “I can’t get that promotion because…” Now, ask yourself if that statement is true.

Then ask how you would know if it were true. Have you tried to get the promotion? Have you looked at your resume and qualifications? Have you tried to demonstrate your knowledge, skill and effectiveness to your boss, co-workers and others who would give feedback and ultimately choose who was in line for a promotion? Most likely you haven’t done all you could to get the promotion.

There is much that we can control and impact with our personal power. Change your thinking and you will start to see what you can do rather than what you can’t do.

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Personal Power Blocker: Perceptions

Are you perceiving the world in a way that is giving away your personal power?

Below are a few ways perceptions might be blocking your personal power.

  • You feel like others control your life
  • You try to be like other people thinking that is the way to a better life
  • You feel someone is holding you back from reaching your full potential
  • You think there isn’t enough time to do xyz
  • You don’t have the support you need to be successfully (e.g. spouse or family support)

If you have any of these perceptions, you need to ask yourself if the perception is true or just a viewpoint.

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We choose how we perceive the world. It may not seem that way all the time but there are many viewpoints of an event. You can choose whether you see an event as good, bad, or indifferent.

Choose to see each event as an opportunity and the world will open up for you.

Personal Power Blocker: Action

How you might be giving away your personal power through action (or lack thereof):

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  • You wait for directions
  • You don’t set any goals – if you have no direction that is just where you will be: nowhere
  • You have trouble focusing – you try one thing but then give up and move to another before giving yourself ample time to be proficient
  • You resist change

If you are waiting for the world to bring you your golden ticket, it’s going to be a long wait. Successful people set goals and take steps to ensure their success. What are you doing to have a successful, happy, fulfilled life?

Take your personal power back by getting in the driver’s seat of your life. Get on the road and start making progress toward your goals.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.

your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have

    Why You Need a Vision

    Experts and life success stories support the idea that with a vision in mind, you are more likely to succeed far beyond what you could otherwise achieve without a clear vision. Think of crafting your life vision as mapping a path to your personal and professional dreams. Life satisfaction and personal happiness are within reach. The harsh reality is that if you don’t develop your own vision, you’ll allow other people and circumstances to direct the course of your life.

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    How to Create Your Life Vision

    Don’t expect a clear and well-defined vision overnight—envisioning your life and determining the course you will follow requires time, and reflection. You need to cultivate vision and perspective, and you also need to apply logic and planning for the practical application of your vision. Your best vision blossoms from your dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It will resonate with your values and ideals, and will generate energy and enthusiasm to help strengthen your commitment to explore the possibilities of your life.

    What Do You Want?

    The question sounds deceptively simple, but it’s often the most difficult to answer. Allowing yourself to explore your deepest desires can be very frightening. You may also not think you have the time to consider something as fanciful as what you want out of life, but it’s important to remind yourself that a life of fulfillment does not usually happen by chance, but by design.

    It’s helpful to ask some thought-provoking questions to help you discover the possibilities of what you want out of life. Consider every aspect of your life, personal and professional, tangible and intangible. Contemplate all the important areas, family and friends, career and success, health and quality of life, spiritual connection and personal growth, and don’t forget about fun and enjoyment.

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    Some tips to guide you:

    • Remember to ask why you want certain things
    • Think about what you want, not on what you don’t want.
    • Give yourself permission to dream.
    • Be creative. Consider ideas that you never thought possible.
    • Focus on your wishes, not what others expect of you.

    Some questions to start your exploration:

    • What really matters to you in life? Not what should matter, what does matter.
    • What would you like to have more of in your life?
    • Set aside money for a moment; what do you want in your career?
    • What are your secret passions and dreams?
    • What would bring more joy and happiness into your life?
    • What do you want your relationships to be like?
    • What qualities would you like to develop?
    • What are your values? What issues do you care about?
    • What are your talents? What’s special about you?
    • What would you most like to accomplish?
    • What would legacy would you like to leave behind?

    It may be helpful to write your thoughts down in a journal or creative vision board if you’re the creative type. Add your own questions, and ask others what they want out of life. Relax and make this exercise fun. You may want to set your answers aside for a while and come back to them later to see if any have changed or if you have anything to add.

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    What Would Your Best Life Look Like?

    Describe your ideal life in detail. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, and create a vivid picture. If you can’t visualize a picture, focus on how your best life would feel. If you find it difficult to envision your life 20 or 30 years from now, start with five years—even a few years into the future will give you a place to start. What you see may surprise you. Set aside preconceived notions. This is your chance to dream and fantasize.

    A few prompts to get you started:

    • What will you have accomplished already?
    • How will you feel about yourself?
    • What kind of people are in your life? How do you feel about them?
    • What does your ideal day look like?
    • Where are you? Where do you live? Think specifics, what city, state, or country, type of community, house or an apartment, style and atmosphere.
    • What would you be doing?
    • Are you with another person, a group of people, or are you by yourself?
    • How are you dressed?
    • What’s your state of mind? Happy or sad? Contented or frustrated?
    • What does your physical body look like? How do you feel about that?
    • Does your best life make you smile and make your heart sing? If it doesn’t, dig deeper, dream bigger.

    It’s important to focus on the result, or at least a way-point in your life. Don’t think about the process for getting there yet—that’s the next stepGive yourself permission to revisit this vision every day, even if only for a few minutes. Keep your vision alive and in the front of your mind.

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    Plan Backwards

    It may sound counter-intuitive to plan backwards rather than forwards, but when you’re planning your life from the end result, it’s often more useful to consider the last step and work your way back to the first. This is actually a valuable and practical strategy for making your vision a reality.

    • What’s the last thing that would’ve had to happen to achieve your best life?
    • What’s the most important choice you would’ve had to make?
    • What would you have needed to learn along the way?
    • What important actions would you have had to take?
    • What beliefs would you have needed to change?
    • What habits or behaviors would you have had to cultivate?
    • What type of support would you have had to enlist?
    • How long will it have taken you to realize your best life?
    • What steps or milestones would you have needed to reach along the way?

    Now it’s time to think about your first step, and the next step after that. Ponder the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in the future. It may seem impossible, but it’s quite achievable if you take it step-by-step.

    It’s important to revisit this vision from time to time. Don’t be surprised if your answers to the questions, your technicolor vision, and the resulting plans change. That can actually be a very good thing; as you change in unforeseeable ways, the best life you envision will change as well. For now, it’s important to use the process, create your vision, and take the first step towards making that vision a reality.

    Featured photo credit: Matt Noble via unsplash.com

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