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15 Things Only Fathers of Girls Understand

15 Things Only Fathers of Girls Understand

Having a daughter is one of the biggest joys in life. However, as a proud dad you feel responsible about so many things in her life! Sometimes you get overprotective. On other days you act too harsh or not harsh enough. You dread the day she becomes a teenager and hate to admit you’d love to spend less money on her clothes and makeup. Yet you love her unconditionally and will keep calling her “baby girl” even after she turns 30. Here are 15 more things fathers of daughters can understand and wholeheartedly relate to.

1. You are a huge influence on her future partner.

Remember, you cause direct impact on who she chooses to marry some day. Your sweet girl is closely watching you and pays huge attention towards your attitude to her mom and other women around. You are responsible for her future ability to trust, enjoy and shape healthy relationships with the males in her life. Consciously or not, a lot of girls pick their partners based on some characteristics of their fathers.

2. You know how to do her hair and nails.

You do realize that pleating a braid is harder than you’ve always thought. Maybe you are not a great stylist, but you can make killer pigtails. You also had to learn how to manage tangle-prone hair without making her squeal and cry. Also, a good dad knows how to paint girls nails and even allows (occasionally) to let her cover your nails with pinky sparkles.

3. You get hard on her at times.

You can be her harshest critic and will always tell her about her mistakes. You only wish the best for your little girl and truly want her to succeed in life, but your methods and words can sometimes be rather tough. “Do you remember our cat? Well, it died because that vet who treated him was getting Cs at school and though it’s okay. But you see, he now can’t treat pets well. C is not good enough. You should have all As” is kind of a tough speech to a 7-year-old who just lost her favorite pet and got a few average grades at school. But you know, it did give me the right idea why I should study more and learn everything I may need in life.

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4. You would love her to follow your career path.

More and more girls these days do get under the dad’s influence on career path and start working in the same field. However, they are still a minority. While you wish you could pass her your job skills and work interests, share your lifelong experience and have her continue your work, do not impose your opinions too harshly!

A friend of mine who has a successful IT company wanted his daughter to work for him so badly that he made her start learning to code from high school, take sql online courses, major in Math and apply to Caltech as he graduated from it, to get a huge shock in a few months as she secretly sent an application to Columbia and got accepted to Media studies program. Needless to say, they never had great relationships and it took him years to admit he was wrong and pushed too hard.

5. You need to ask for forgiveness.

Probably, more times that you would like to admit that. You may not realize you have unintentionally hurt your daughter’s feelings badly with what seemed to you like a witty pun about a boy she likes or because you’ve missed her school performance. Most of the time she’ll get over it, but when it is a big deal indeed, do ask for forgiveness. And I mean not just plain “sorry,” but a sincere plea for forgiveness. You should let her know that you may not be perfect and sometimes don’t have it all together, but you care about her feelings and love her. Don’t let her grow realizing you’d always be superior and her feelings do not count.

6. You always want the best for her.

Yes, you can be hard on her and demand her to do things you think are right for her. You will always be upset if you see her living the life out of alignment from her potential. You will always want to make sure she takes advantages of the opportunities and achieves everything she’s capable of and more.

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7. You have to be consistent.

Your girl goes through numerous ups and downs, especially as she reaches adolescence. She needs a father’s steady guidance and objective presence. Your daughter needs to know you’ll be always there for her and she can always rely on you. Don’t let her grow with a false belief that men can not be trusted.

8. You need to teach her that appearance isn’t everything.

Yes, it is your role as a dad to teach your girl that the what is inside will take her way further in life than just a pretty face. Raising girls in the modern sensual world is not easy, but you have to explain her that her character, her brains and her self-worth are way more important than a stylish haircut, a pair of good fitting jeans and her long lashes. You are to tell her than exposing too much skin or fitting into size zero is not what makes her really beautiful. Also, you’ll have to spill her out the truth that most models are Photoshopped, her favorite celebs don’t get up in the morning with that perfect makeup and getting a nose job will not make that boy fall in love with her.

9. You’ll need to tolerate her boyfriends.

The harshest times are when people start staring at you when your daughter calls you daddy in public. She’s no longer a sweet little princes, but an attractive young women who now gets a lot of looks from other men on the street. The biggest struggle of all fathers is when she drags her first boyfriend to meet you or you find them making out on the couch when you come home earlier.

Don’t be way too overprotective. Don’t forbid her to date or promise to kill that bastard if you see him again sneaking in her window. You know boys—that can be cruel and try to offend her. But you need to trust her judgments and keep the distance from her love life.

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10. You need to maintain status quo in mother/daughter disputes.

Never ever take sides in disputes going between your daughter and your wife. Once you take someone’s side, you will offend the other one for a lifetime. Just stay neutral and clearly explain you will never be a judge in their disputes.

11. You teach her how to say “no.”

It’s your role to explain her how to set physical boundaries and say “no” to things she does not like and she shouldn’t be afraid or embarrassed of this. Teach her how to say no firmly and direct. Also, make sure she understands when someone else says no—she has to respect it.

12. You need to be a listener.

When she comes to talk to you about her problems, it’s not always that she wants you to give her a solution. Sometimes, you just need to let her talk out, listen, give short encouragements or signs of compassion, instead of offering to fix everything.

13. You know how to avoid her manipulations.

Yes, you love your girl and always want the best for her, but you learned to be tough enough to resist buying her another expensive doll when she gives out a few sobs. You feel bad for cutting down her monthly allowance due to bad grades, but will not change your mind because of some passionate pleads. You need to explain her that manipulations and playing on emotions is not the best strategy to succeed in life.

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14. You share music with each other.

Yes, you kind of hate One Direction, but sharing music with each other is a great way to bond. You play her good classy songs occasionally and explain why you like them. Also, you have taught her the wisdom of volume control and why and when it’s appropriate to wear headphones.

15. You are anxious about the day when you’ll lead her to the altar.

That means your little girl has grown up and now another man becomes an integral part of your life. You are absolutely happy for her, but you kind of dread the time when you’ll need to let her go and admit she has grown up.

Featured photo credit: DVIDSHUB via flickr.com

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Elena Prokopets

Elena is a passionate blogger who shares about lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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Last Updated on November 18, 2020

50 Habits of Highly Successful People You Should Learn

50 Habits of Highly Successful People You Should Learn

If you’re like me and really into self-development, you’ve probably read many of the thousands of self-help books out there on the market. But also like me, you probably find all the information a bit overwhelming.

That’s why I wanted to do the self-less task of taking the most important, life-changing lessons I’ve drawn from these books and condensed them into 50 key points.

Here’re 50 habits of successful people you should learn:

1. Believe It to See It

Our minds tend to focus on what’s happening around us and refuse to see what could happen. Only when you trust in what’s possible and dare to dream big, big things can happen for you.

2. See Problems as a Wonderful Gift

While others only see problems and give up, successful people use the problem as a lesson to find improvement in themselves or the task at hand.

3. Keep Looking for Solutions

Even if they’re knee-deep in problems, successful people will still put all of their focus on finding solutions.

4. Remember It’s All About the Journey

Successful people are conscious and methodical in creating their own success. They don’t sit around doing the bare minimum, hoping success finds them.

5. Feel the Fear and Do It Anyway

There’s so much fear on the road to success, but instead of letting that fear control and limit them, successful people do a good job of just forging ahead regardless.

6. Always Ask Productive Questions

It’s all about asking the right questions. Successful people make sure they are questions that will elicit information for a more productive, creative and positive mindset moving forward.

7. Understand the Best Waste of Energy Is Complaining

Successful people know that choosing to see the negative side of things will only create a useless and unproductive state.

8. Don’t Play the Blame Game

Taking responsibility for actions and outcomes is a form of empowerment that you can build your success upon. While the act of blaming others or outside circumstances takes this empowerment away from you.

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9. Maximize Your Strengths

Not every successful person is simply more talented than the rest, but they do use what they know they’re good at to achieve more successful results.

10. Be in It to Win It

Successful people are busy, productive and proactive. Instead of sitting around over-thinking and over-planning a great idea, they just take a step towards it no matter how small.

11. Know That Success Attracts Success

People who are successful surround themselves and seek out like-minded people. They understand the importance of being part of a team and forge win-win relationships.

12. Actually Choose to Be Successful

Dreaming big is a massive part of being successful even if your dream seems impossible. Ambition is a mindset that needs to be a daily conscious choice.

13. Visualize, Visualize, Visualize!

You’ve got to see your success in your mind’s eye even before it comes. Successful people clarify and get that certainty about what they want their reality to look like rather than being mere spectators of life.

14. Be a One-Off Original

Successful people look for what’s working and then create a unique spin on it. Imitating only regurgitates other people’s ideas with no originality.

15. The Perfect Time to Act Is Now

Waiting for the right time to act is basically procrastination wrapped up in an excuse. Successful people know there’s never a perfect time so they may as well just do it now.

16. Keep Learning, Keep Growing

Continuous learning is the key to a successful life. Whether it’s academic, being a student of life or actionable learning, it’s all about expanding your knowledge and personal development.

17. Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

Successful people have the knack for finding positive aspects in all people and circumstances no matter what.

18. Having a Bad Day? Do It Anyway!

We all have bad moods but it shouldn’t be an excuse to stop everything. Giving into a bad mood just stop-starts your life, slowing success way down.

19. Sometimes Risky Business Is Needed

Calculated risks are a must for success. It’s about weighing the pros and cons while moving forward with that element of trust.

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20. Accept Challenge All the Time

Dealing with problems head-on is a must to be successful. Successful people also face challenges in order to improve themselves.

21. Make Your Own Luck

In the mindset of a successful person, there’s no such thing as ‘luck’ or ‘fate’. They take control to actively and consciously create their own best life.

22. Ignite Your Initiative

While many people are reactive, successful people are proactive – taking action before they have to.

23. Be the Master of Your Emotions

Being effective at managing emotions is key on the road to success. That’s not to say successful people don’t feel like we all do, but they’re just not slaves to their emotions.

24. Champion in Communication

Consciously working on effective communication skills gets anyone closer to success.

25. Plan Your Life Strategically

Successful people’s lives aren’t a clumsy series of unplanned events and outcomes, they methodically work at turning their plans into a reality.

26. Become Exceptional at What You Do

To become exceptional, you typically have to do things that most won’t. To become successful, hard decisions need to be made and acting on them is crucial.

27. Choose to Live Outside of Your Comfort Zone

While many people are pleasure junkies and avoid pain and discomfort at all costs, successful people understand the value and benefits of working through the tough stuff that most would avoid.

28. Live by Core Values

Successful people firstly identify their core values and what’s important to them, then do their best to live a life that reflects these values.

29. Realize Money Isn’t Everything

Money and success are not interchangeable and the most successful people understand this. Putting money on a pedestal and equating it to success is a dangerous mindset to have. Success comes in many forms.

30. Don’t Get Carried Away

Successful people understand the importance of discipline and self-control and as a result they are happy to take the road less travelled.

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31. Self-Worth Is Not Tied to Success

Successful people are secure. They do not derive their self-worth from what they own, who they know, where they live or what they look like.

32. Kindness Breeds Kindness (And Success)

Generosity and kindness is a common trait among long-term successful people. It’s important to take pleasure in helping others achieve.

33. More Humility, Less Arrogance

Successful people are humble and happy to admit and apologize for mistakes. This is because they’re confident in their ability. They are happy to learn from others and happy to make others look good rather than seek their own personal glory.

34. Change Opens New Doors

People who are successful are adaptable and embrace change, while the majority are creatures of comfort and habit. They are comfortable with, and embrace, the new and the unfamiliar.

35. Success Requires a Healthy Body

It’s not just how you think, it’s about how you show up for success. Successful people understand the importance of being physically well, not for vain reasons but because being in tiptop condition creates a better personal life for success.

36. Laziness Just Doesn’t Exist

Successful people are never considered lazy. Yes, they can relax when they need to, but working hard is their game.

37. Resilience by the Bucket Load

When difficulty strikes, most would throw in the towel, but successful people are just warming up.

38. Feedback Is Just Another Chance to Improve

How people react to feedback determines their potential for success. Being open to constructive criticism and acting on it to improve is most seen in those who are successful.

39. Your Vibe Attracts Your Tribe

If people are hanging out with toxic and negative people, then they need to take a look at themselves. Successful people hang out with others who are positive and supportive.

40. Can’t Control It? Forget It

Successful people don’t invest time or emotional energy into things which they have no control of.

41. Swim Against the Tide

Successful people are not people-pleasers and they don’t need constant approval from others in order to move ahead.

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42. Alone Time Is Valuable Time

More self-worth means being more comfortable with your own company. Successful people are more happy and see the value in spending time alone.

43. Self-Standard Is Higher Than Most

Everyone has a choice to set high standards for themselves. Successful people do this, which in turn produces greater commitment, more momentum, a better work ethic and of course, better results.

44. Failure Isn’t Rationalized

While many use age, health, lack of time, ‘bad luck’, or lack of opportunity to explain away their failure, the key to success is finding a way to succeed despite facing these challenges.

45. Down Time Is an Important Part of a Routine

Having an off switch and taking time to do things that make them happy is a common trait of a successful person. Take a look at here The Importance of Scheduling Downtime.

46. Career Isn’t Who You Are, It’s What You Do

Successful people know their career isn’t their identity. They are multi-dimensional and don’t define themselves by their job.

47. Be Interested in Only the Path of Resistance

While most people look for the easiest way or the shortcut, successful people are more interested in the most effective way. They look for the course of action which will produce the best results over the long term.

48. Follow Through

Many spend their life starting things that they never finish, but successful people get the job done. Even when the excitement and the novelty has worn off they still follow through and finish.

49. Invest in All Your Dimensions

We’re not just physical and psychological beings, but emotional and spiritual creatures as well. Successful people consciously work at being healthy and productive on all levels.

50. Put Your Money Where Your Mouth Is

To obtain success, it’s important to practice what you preach. Successful people don’t talk about the theory, they live the reality.

So there you have it, a summary of what I’ve learned from self-help books. But of course, you need to start taking actions so you will get closer to success too.

Bonus: 5 Bad Habits To Quit

More About Success

Featured photo credit: Juan Jose via unsplash.com

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