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Want To Live A Happier Life? Here Are 11 Unmissable And Positive Habits.

Want To Live A Happier Life? Here Are 11 Unmissable And Positive Habits.

“Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.” — Dalai Lama

Having a happier life is something we all always strive for, and being happy encompasses so many aspects—mental, physical and spiritual—of our lives.

One of the key foundations of having a happier life is to be consistent in doing things that manifest happiness. It is important to cultivate the right habits to ensure we live a happier life. Some people do it well while others don’t. What’s good to know is that everyone can be happy by incorporating some powerful habits into their daily lives.

What I’ve learned from being happy is that no matter how bad our days get, happiness can be found, especially when we consistently try to consciously be happy.

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Consider these 11 habits to enhance your life and make it as happy as you possibly can.

1. Surround yourself with people who matter.

It’s amazing how much the people around us can affect our emotions. As quoted by Jim Rohn, “We are an average of the five people we spend the most time with.” Spend more time with people who matter and remove those who do not have a good and positive impact on your life. These people with positive, happy energy can bring happiness into your life just because you’re constantly surrounded by them.

2. Learn how to relax when setbacks arise.

We do not live in a perfect world. Some days are great; some days are not. Some days we think; some days we relax with a good book. Some days, the buses run extremely late, and you swear you’ll never take the public transport ever again. Accept the fact that that things may not go as planned. Instead of trying to change something you can’t, focus your energy on changing something that is within your control.

Check this out: The 5-minute Guide To Meditation: Anywhere, Anytime.

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3. Laugh in the middle of a busy day.

It’s 3 PM on a Friday afternoon and you’re desperate to leave the office. On top of the work you have, you’re running close to a super important deadline. Instead of blaming everything not going your way, take a moment to laugh. Ever wondered why Friends is entertaining to watch? Because they make jokes no matter how life is going down, something we should do more often, especially on a busy day.

4. Do not compare yourself to others.

Measure your own successes based on your progress, and only yours. All of our lives are unique, and no one is better than any one else. Try not to think that you are better than anyone else as it promotes unhealthy superiority and can be detrimental to your happiness.

5. See that colleague in the beautiful new dress? Compliment her.

Everyone loves compliments, including that colleague who just walked in on a Monday morning in a beautiful dress. Being kind to others, like passing random compliments, is contagious and most importantly, it makes people happy, boosting self-esteem and confidence. Don’t be afraid to tell people how great they look, or how awesome their smile is. It’ll do good for them, and you!

6. Stop trying to please others.

It’s tiring and you will soon run out of time to please yourself, period.

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You may also like: 10 Ways To Always Be Yourself And Live Happily

7. Focus on the present moment.

Take some time every day to focus on the present moment; it is the only certain time we have in our life. Try not to think about the negative past experiences and embrace the time you have now. You’ll soon find that even the slightest thing that you do at this moment can bring about happiness for many hours and days to come.

8. Easy, Tiger! Learn how to control your emotions and reactions.

It’s not worth the punch when a co-worker is trying to be funny. It’s not worth the argument when your partner is testing your patience. And it’s definitely not worth the emotions. Don’t compromise on your happiness just because someone is trying to pick a fight. Like Disney’s Frozen, Let It Go and be happier.

9. Find time to workout regularly and eat well.

Exercise can produce tons of feel-good hormones—endorphins, serotonin and dopamine just to name a few. These hormones can help avoid some symptoms of stress and depression. Feeding your body with whole and nutritious foods, on the other hand, can positively impact your body in both the short and long term. Find time to schedule in a workout even if it’s only thirty minutes and do something you love. Eat well because food that are good for you can help you stay focused and more energized, and happier as a whole.

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Also on Lifehack: 7 Things You Should Stop Doing When Trying To Be Healthy

10. Learn how to accept constructive criticism.

No one is always right. Other people may have better judgement, experience and knowledge than you do. If you’ve made a mistake, learn how to accept it and the constructive criticism that comes along with it. Put your ego aside because it won’t do any good to your happy factor.

11. Sit cross-legged, be silly, and do something fun.

In other words, be child-like. Ever wondered why children are always so carefree and happy? That’s because they don’t have anything to worry about. Try to set aside a few hours a day bringing your inner child out and focus on doing something fun just for the sake of it, and for the sake of making yourself happy.

What other habits do you practice to live a happier life?

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1 19 Golden Pieces of Relationship Advice From the Experts 2 Signs Of Low Self-Esteem And The Root Causes You Might Not Know 3 How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship 4 How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future 5 This Is What Happens When You Move Out Of the Comfort Zone

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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