Advertising
Advertising

The Top 10 Things That Could Make A Wedding a Disaster

The Top 10 Things That Could Make A Wedding a Disaster

Each wedding season, thousands of engaged couples pour significant amounts of time and energy (and of course, money) into planning their Pinterest-perfect nuptials. From burlap-wrapped mason jars to hand-painted favors, there is no shortage of ways to make the big day flawless. Despite all of the beautiful ways a wedding can go right, here are ten reasons saying “I do” could go terribly wrong.

190868_77512-hitchin-drinkin-grubin-wester-wedding-signs_display

    Image credit:  Country Outfitter

    Advertising

    1. The Weatherman is a Liar

    If you plan on having all or part of your wedding outside, there is a legitimate chance that the weather will be less than cooperative (if you live in the North West, it’s a guarantee). From unbearable heat to a torrential downpour, nothing will put a damper on festivities faster than an uncomfortable climate. In order to help combat less than ideal weather conditions, make sure to provide guests with some sort of shelter. Rental units like party tents have become a wedding staple due to their versatility, while more venue specific options (like barns or clubhouses) can be leveraged when appropriate.

    2. Running Out Of Food

    Wedding guests usually sacrifice an admirable amount of time and money in order to help celebrate your big day, so giving them a little bit of food is a much appreciated gesture (who doesn’t like gratuitous food?!). There are delectable options for any budget, from a multi-course sit-down meal to a desserts-only buffet. The trick here is to make sure to have enough of whatever you’re providing – running out of food before everybody has had a chance to eat is an uncomfortable predicament. If you will be providing alcohol at your nuptials, do yourselves a favor and give your guests something to soak the booze up with.

    3. When The Drinks Are Gone

    Advertising

    celebration-367601_1280

      Speaking of alcohol, make sure to put some extra thought into this portion of the celebration. The budget will rear its ugly head here once again, as will venue restrictions and licensing requirements. Running out of drinks too early is the physical equivalent of an awkward silence, so try to avoid it at all costs. If you’re having an open bar (send me an invite) you won’t have to worry about your wells running dry. If, however, you are buying kegs and/or wine, consider touching base with a caterer. They are experts in their field, and can offer ordering recommendations based upon your guest count. Since drinking and driving is nobody’s friend, it’s a smart (and courteous) move to make sure that there are alternative transportation options available for those who imbibe one too many.

      4. Loosing Control Over The Guest List

      The wedding guest list will haunt you long after the invitations have been sent. Deciding who to leave out and who to obligatorily add can be enough to push some couples to the edge of sanity. Choose a relaxed, neutral time and location to hash this out well ahead of the wedding day (and make sure to allow extra time for address-acquisition). Waiting for RSVP’s can be just as harrowing; by the time people decide to respond, your budget is likely running on fumes, despite still having food and drinks to pay for. To combat this, put an RSVP-by-date on your invitations to encourage invitees to get back to you in a timely manner, and make sure to keep finances in mind when you’re compiling the guest list.

      5. Not Getting Bridesmaids And Groomsmen Organized

      Bridesmaids and groomsmen play a variety of notable roles on the big day, from assisting with decorating to giving a marginally embarrassing toast that briefly mentions “that one time in Cabo…” It becomes unfortunately easy to harbor resentment (on both sides) due to disputes over things like lack of participation and/or money. Be sure to let your maids and men know (well in advance) when and how they can help. Remember – they’ve all got lives that don’t revolve around your wedding, so giving them options in advance allows them to plan ahead. Being in the wedding party also comes with its fair share of expenses, so be mindful of their budgets. Talking about money is an awkward discussion to have with anybody (especially friends), but it can prevent a strained relationship. Encourage your wedding party to be honest with you if they are encountering financial issues, and then work together to find a solution.

      Advertising

      6. Family Wars

      Let’s be honest – nobody’s family is picture perfect. Whether you could give the Lohans a run for their money or make the Ozbournes blush, longstanding household issues will still exist on your wedding day. Prior to the big day, have a frank discussion with your families and emphasize that you’d like them to temporarily put their disputes aside for a few hours. This doesn’t mean everybody has to act like they love each other, but it does mean that all weave-pulling and throat punching will be put on hold. If despite your best efforts, the drama-mama-monster could still rear it’s ugly head on the day-of and if efforts to diffuse the situation (separating the feuding parties, etc.) prove futile, consider asking them to leave. The temporary scene of escorting people out is worth spending the remaining time drama free.

      7. Wedding Crashers

      First, let’s acknowledge that it takes a brave soul to stroll (uninvited) into a wedding and proceed to free-load off of the food and alcohol (not that you would know, or anything…). However, you didn’t tirelessly labor over your budget to make sure that there would be JUST enough food and drinks for your dearly beloved to have uninvited guests leech off of your supplies. In most cases, simply confronting the crasher is more than enough to encourage them to leave. If they put up any resistance, recruit some of your most intimidating guests to help drive the point home. If it turns out that Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson actually decide to show up at your nuptials,feel free to pretend that they are really a part of the family.

      8. If Time Is Not On Your Side

      For guests, there seems to be an abundance of time at a wedding; for the wedding party, there never seems to be quite enough! One of the biggest favors you can do for yourselves (and your guests) is to set a day-of events schedule. This will make sure that the wedding party is all on the same page, and it will also aid in the timeliness of your caterers/band/photographers etc. Having a schedule will also prevent a significant lull in time for guests while providing that nothing is left undone (first dances, cake cutting, garter toss, etc.). Your wedding can still have a laid-back feel (even with an agenda); the day doesn’t need to be planned down to the minute. You will likely find that the events ebb-and-flow within a half an hour (give or take) of the actual schedule; so some flexibility is key.

      Advertising

      9. No Pictures Or Photos Of Bad Quality

      wedding-dress-349959_640

        Pictures are one of the most important takeaways from your big day, so make sure to plan accordingly. Hire a well reputed, notable photographer. This could be a family member, friend, or professional – just make sure that you and your fiance appreciate their style and are on-board with their work ethic. It would be a huge disappointment to have not enough pictures, poor-quality pictures, or stylistically unfavorable shots. Additionally, you can be sure that guests will be snapping pictures with their smartphones – and some of them will be great! Encourage guests to download an app like WedPics, which allows mobile users to upload and share their photos with the happy couple. When you are crafting the schedule for the day-of, make sure to allow for ample picture time. You’ll likely be around friends and family that you don’t often get to see, so make sure to snap a shot together.

        10. Ruining The Reception

        Ah, the reception. This token point of your wedding day will likely be most attendees’ favorite part. It’s also where guests will spend the majority of their time, so it’s essential to make sure that there are appropriate accommodations. If your reception is outside, ensure that there are restrooms available for guests (this could mean porta-potties) and that there is some form of shelter (as mentioned in the first point). There will be no such thing as too many trash cans- – aving to pick up after your guests sucks, so encourage them to do it themselves. Not everybody was born a dancing queen, so include plenty of auxiliary seating for those who wish to take a load off. As a newly-married couple, the reception is a perfect chance to make the rounds and greet all of the folks that made it a point to share your big day. Most importantly, the reception is your chance to soak up (and celebrate!) being married, with the people you care about the most – so make sure to live it up.

        Should you find yourself poised on the edge of a potential wedding disaster, allow these humble tips to talk you back from the edge. The most important part of your nuptials (after all) is marrying the person you love – after that, everything is gravy.

        Featured photo credit: greyerbaby via morguefile.com

        More by this author

        Andrew Heikkila

        Owner-Operator of Earthlings Entertainmnet

        5 Crazy Future Tech Trends to Start Preparing for Now Understanding Luck: What It Is and How to Control It 12 Strange Remedies for Whatever Ails You 7 Ways the Internet of Things Will Change Driving Forever 7 Ways We’re Slowly Becoming Our Phones

        Trending in Communication

        1 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way 2 How to Break Free From Negative Thinking for Good 3 15 Simple Things You Can Do to Boost Your Daily Motivation 4 How to Say No When You Know You Say Yes Too Often 5 Feeling Super Stressed? Do This Daily Routine Every Day

        Read Next

        Advertising
        Advertising
        Advertising

        Last Updated on September 18, 2020

        13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

        13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

        For the original article by Celestine: 13 Helping Points When Things Don’t Go Your Way

        “We all have problems. The way we solve them is what makes us different.” ~Unknown

        “It’s not stress that kills us, it is our reaction to it.” – Hans Selye

        Have you ever experienced moments when things just don’t go your way? For example, losing your keys, accidentally spilling your drink, waking up late, missing your buses/trains, forgetting to bring your things, and so on?

        You’re not alone. All of us, myself included, experience times when things don’t go as we expect.

        Here is my guide on how to deal with daily setbacks.

        1. Take a step back and evaluate

        When something bad happens, take a step back and evaluate the situation. Some questions to ask yourself:

        1. What is the problem?
        2. Are you the only person facing this problem in the world today?
        3. How does this problem look like at an individual level? A national level? On a global scale?
        4. What’s the worst possible thing that can happen to you as a result of this?
        5. How is it going to impact your life in the next 1 year? 5 years? 10 years?

        Doing this exercise is not to undermine the problem or disclaiming responsibility, but to consider different perspectives, so you can adopt the best approach for it. Most problems we encounter daily may seem like huge issues when they crop up, but most, if not all, don’t have much impact in our life beyond that day.

        Advertising

        2. Vent if you have to, but don’t linger on the problem

        If you feel very frustrated and need to let off some steam, go ahead and do that. Talk to a friend, complain, crib about it, or scream at the top of your lungs if it makes you happy.

        At the same time, don’t get caught up with venting. While venting may temporarily relieve yourself, it’s not going to solve the problem ultimately. You don’t want to be an energy vampire.

        Vent if there’s a need to, but do it for 15 to 20 minutes. Then move on.

        3. Realize there are others out there facing this too

        Even though the situation may be frustrating, you’re not alone. Remember there are almost 7 billion people in the world today, and chances are that other people have faced the same thing before too. Knowing it’s not just you helps you to get out of a self-victimizing mindset.

        4. Process your thoughts/emotions

        Process your thoughts/emotions with any of the four methods:

        1. Journal. Write your unhappiness in a private diary or in your blog. It doesn’t have to be formal at all – it can be a brain dump on rough paper or new word document. Delete after you are done.
        2. Audio taping. Record yourself as you talk out what’s on your mind. Tools include tape recorder, your PC (Audacity is a freeware for recording/editing audio) and your mobile (most mobiles today have audio recording functions). You can even use your voice mail for this. Just talking helps you to gain awareness of your emotions. After recording, play back and listen to what you said. You might find it quite revealing.
        3. Meditation. At its simplest form, meditation is just sitting/lying still and observing your reality as it is – including your thoughts and emotions. Some think that it involves some complex mambo-jumbo, but it doesn’t.
        4. Talking to someone. Talking about it with someone helps you work through the issue. It also gets you an alternate viewpoint and consider it from a different angle.

        5. Acknowledge your thoughts

        Don’t resist your thoughts, but acknowledge them. This includes both positive and negative thoughts.

        By acknowledging, I mean recognizing these thoughts exist. So if say, you have a thought that says, “Wow, I’m so stupid!”, acknowledge that. If you have a thought that says, “I can’t believe this is happening to me again”, acknowledge that as well.

        Advertising

        Know that acknowledging the thoughts doesn’t mean you agree with them. It’s simply recognizing the existence of said thoughts so that you can stop resisting yourself and focus on the situation on hand.

        6. Give yourself a break

        If you’re very stressed out by the situation, and the problem is not time sensitive, then give yourself a break. Take a walk, listen to some music, watch a movie, or get some sleep. When you’re done, you should feel a lot more revitalized to deal with the situation.

        7. Uncover what you’re really upset about

        A lot of times, the anger we feel isn’t about the world. You may start off feeling angry at someone or something, but at the depth of it, it’s anger toward yourself.

        Uncover the root of your anger. I have written a five part anger management series on how to permanently overcome anger.

        After that, ask yourself: How can you improve the situation? Go to Step #9, where you define your actionable steps. Our anger comes from not having control on the situation. Sitting there and feeling infuriated is not going to change the situation. The more action we take, the more we will regain control over the situation, the better we will feel.

        8. See this as an obstacle to be overcome

        As Helen Keller once said,

        “Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experiences of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved.”

        Whatever you’re facing right now, see it as an obstacle to be overcome. In every worthy endeavor, there’ll always be countless obstacles that emerge along the way. These obstacles are what separate the people who make it, and those who don’t. If you’re able to push through and overcome them, you’ll emerge a stronger person than before. It’ll be harder for anything to get you down in the future.

        9. Analyze the situation – Focus on actionable steps

        In every setback, there are going to be things that can’t be reversed since they have already occurred. You want to focus on things that can still be changed (salvageable) vs. things that have already happened and can’t be changed. The only time the situation changes is when you take steps to improve it. Rather than cry over spilt milk, work through your situation:

        1. What’s the situation?
        2. What’s stressing you about this situation?
        3. What are the next steps that’ll help you resolve them?
        4. Take action on your next steps!

        After you have identified your next steps, act on them. The key here is to focus on the actionable steps, not the inactionable steps. It’s about regaining control over the situation through direct action.

        10. Identify how it occurred (so it won’t occur again next time)

        A lot of times we react to our problems. The problem occurs, and we try to make the best out of what has happened within the context. While developing a healthy coping mechanism is important (which is what the other helping points are on), it’s also equally important, if not more, to understand how the problem arose. This way, you can work on preventing it from taking place next time, vs. dealing reactively with it.

        Most of us probably think the problem is outside of our control, but reality is most of the times it’s fully preventable. It’s just a matter of how much responsibility you take over the problem.

        For example, for someone who can’t get a cab for work in the morning, he/she may see the problem as a lack of cabs in the country, or bad luck. However, if you trace to the root of the problem, it’s probably more to do with (a) Having unrealistic expectations of the length of time to get a cab. He/she should budget more time for waiting for a cab next time. (b) Oversleeping, because he/she was too tired from working late the previous day. He/she should allocate enough time for rest next time. He/she should also pick up better time management skills, so as to finish work in lesser time.

        11. Realize the situation can be a lot worse

        No matter how bad the situation is, it can always be much worse. A plus point vs. negative point analysis will help you realize that.

        Advertising

        12. Do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it

        No matter how bad your situation may seem, do your best, but don’t kill yourself over it. Life is too beautiful to worry so much over daily issues. Take a step back (#1), give yourself a break if you need to (#6), and do what you can within your means (#9). Everything else will unfold accordingly. Worrying too much about the outcome isn’t going to change things or make your life any better.

        13. Pick out the learning points from the encounter

        There’s something to learn from every encounter. What have you learned from this situation? What lessons have you taken away?

        After you identify your learning points, think about how you’re going to apply them moving forward. With this, you’ve clearly gained something from this encounter. You’ve walked away a stronger, wiser, better person, with more life lessons to draw from in the future.

        Get the manifesto version of this article: [Manifesto] What To Do When Things Don’t Go Your Way

        Featured photo credit: Alice Donovan Rouse via unsplash.com

        Read Next