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The Top 10 Things That Could Make A Wedding a Disaster

The Top 10 Things That Could Make A Wedding a Disaster

Each wedding season, thousands of engaged couples pour significant amounts of time and energy (and of course, money) into planning their Pinterest-perfect nuptials. From burlap-wrapped mason jars to hand-painted favors, there is no shortage of ways to make the big day flawless. Despite all of the beautiful ways a wedding can go right, here are ten reasons saying “I do” could go terribly wrong.

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    Image credit:  Country Outfitter

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    1. The Weatherman is a Liar

    If you plan on having all or part of your wedding outside, there is a legitimate chance that the weather will be less than cooperative (if you live in the North West, it’s a guarantee). From unbearable heat to a torrential downpour, nothing will put a damper on festivities faster than an uncomfortable climate. In order to help combat less than ideal weather conditions, make sure to provide guests with some sort of shelter. Rental units like party tents have become a wedding staple due to their versatility, while more venue specific options (like barns or clubhouses) can be leveraged when appropriate.

    2. Running Out Of Food

    Wedding guests usually sacrifice an admirable amount of time and money in order to help celebrate your big day, so giving them a little bit of food is a much appreciated gesture (who doesn’t like gratuitous food?!). There are delectable options for any budget, from a multi-course sit-down meal to a desserts-only buffet. The trick here is to make sure to have enough of whatever you’re providing – running out of food before everybody has had a chance to eat is an uncomfortable predicament. If you will be providing alcohol at your nuptials, do yourselves a favor and give your guests something to soak the booze up with.

    3. When The Drinks Are Gone

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      Speaking of alcohol, make sure to put some extra thought into this portion of the celebration. The budget will rear its ugly head here once again, as will venue restrictions and licensing requirements. Running out of drinks too early is the physical equivalent of an awkward silence, so try to avoid it at all costs. If you’re having an open bar (send me an invite) you won’t have to worry about your wells running dry. If, however, you are buying kegs and/or wine, consider touching base with a caterer. They are experts in their field, and can offer ordering recommendations based upon your guest count. Since drinking and driving is nobody’s friend, it’s a smart (and courteous) move to make sure that there are alternative transportation options available for those who imbibe one too many.

      4. Loosing Control Over The Guest List

      The wedding guest list will haunt you long after the invitations have been sent. Deciding who to leave out and who to obligatorily add can be enough to push some couples to the edge of sanity. Choose a relaxed, neutral time and location to hash this out well ahead of the wedding day (and make sure to allow extra time for address-acquisition). Waiting for RSVP’s can be just as harrowing; by the time people decide to respond, your budget is likely running on fumes, despite still having food and drinks to pay for. To combat this, put an RSVP-by-date on your invitations to encourage invitees to get back to you in a timely manner, and make sure to keep finances in mind when you’re compiling the guest list.

      5. Not Getting Bridesmaids And Groomsmen Organized

      Bridesmaids and groomsmen play a variety of notable roles on the big day, from assisting with decorating to giving a marginally embarrassing toast that briefly mentions “that one time in Cabo…” It becomes unfortunately easy to harbor resentment (on both sides) due to disputes over things like lack of participation and/or money. Be sure to let your maids and men know (well in advance) when and how they can help. Remember – they’ve all got lives that don’t revolve around your wedding, so giving them options in advance allows them to plan ahead. Being in the wedding party also comes with its fair share of expenses, so be mindful of their budgets. Talking about money is an awkward discussion to have with anybody (especially friends), but it can prevent a strained relationship. Encourage your wedding party to be honest with you if they are encountering financial issues, and then work together to find a solution.

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      6. Family Wars

      Let’s be honest – nobody’s family is picture perfect. Whether you could give the Lohans a run for their money or make the Ozbournes blush, longstanding household issues will still exist on your wedding day. Prior to the big day, have a frank discussion with your families and emphasize that you’d like them to temporarily put their disputes aside for a few hours. This doesn’t mean everybody has to act like they love each other, but it does mean that all weave-pulling and throat punching will be put on hold. If despite your best efforts, the drama-mama-monster could still rear it’s ugly head on the day-of and if efforts to diffuse the situation (separating the feuding parties, etc.) prove futile, consider asking them to leave. The temporary scene of escorting people out is worth spending the remaining time drama free.

      7. Wedding Crashers

      First, let’s acknowledge that it takes a brave soul to stroll (uninvited) into a wedding and proceed to free-load off of the food and alcohol (not that you would know, or anything…). However, you didn’t tirelessly labor over your budget to make sure that there would be JUST enough food and drinks for your dearly beloved to have uninvited guests leech off of your supplies. In most cases, simply confronting the crasher is more than enough to encourage them to leave. If they put up any resistance, recruit some of your most intimidating guests to help drive the point home. If it turns out that Vince Vaughn and Owen Wilson actually decide to show up at your nuptials,feel free to pretend that they are really a part of the family.

      8. If Time Is Not On Your Side

      For guests, there seems to be an abundance of time at a wedding; for the wedding party, there never seems to be quite enough! One of the biggest favors you can do for yourselves (and your guests) is to set a day-of events schedule. This will make sure that the wedding party is all on the same page, and it will also aid in the timeliness of your caterers/band/photographers etc. Having a schedule will also prevent a significant lull in time for guests while providing that nothing is left undone (first dances, cake cutting, garter toss, etc.). Your wedding can still have a laid-back feel (even with an agenda); the day doesn’t need to be planned down to the minute. You will likely find that the events ebb-and-flow within a half an hour (give or take) of the actual schedule; so some flexibility is key.

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      9. No Pictures Or Photos Of Bad Quality

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        Pictures are one of the most important takeaways from your big day, so make sure to plan accordingly. Hire a well reputed, notable photographer. This could be a family member, friend, or professional – just make sure that you and your fiance appreciate their style and are on-board with their work ethic. It would be a huge disappointment to have not enough pictures, poor-quality pictures, or stylistically unfavorable shots. Additionally, you can be sure that guests will be snapping pictures with their smartphones – and some of them will be great! Encourage guests to download an app like WedPics, which allows mobile users to upload and share their photos with the happy couple. When you are crafting the schedule for the day-of, make sure to allow for ample picture time. You’ll likely be around friends and family that you don’t often get to see, so make sure to snap a shot together.

        10. Ruining The Reception

        Ah, the reception. This token point of your wedding day will likely be most attendees’ favorite part. It’s also where guests will spend the majority of their time, so it’s essential to make sure that there are appropriate accommodations. If your reception is outside, ensure that there are restrooms available for guests (this could mean porta-potties) and that there is some form of shelter (as mentioned in the first point). There will be no such thing as too many trash cans- – aving to pick up after your guests sucks, so encourage them to do it themselves. Not everybody was born a dancing queen, so include plenty of auxiliary seating for those who wish to take a load off. As a newly-married couple, the reception is a perfect chance to make the rounds and greet all of the folks that made it a point to share your big day. Most importantly, the reception is your chance to soak up (and celebrate!) being married, with the people you care about the most – so make sure to live it up.

        Should you find yourself poised on the edge of a potential wedding disaster, allow these humble tips to talk you back from the edge. The most important part of your nuptials (after all) is marrying the person you love – after that, everything is gravy.

        Featured photo credit: greyerbaby via morguefile.com

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        Andrew Heikkila

        Owner-Operator of Earthlings Entertainmnet

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        Last Updated on February 11, 2021

        Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

        Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

        How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

        Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

        The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

        Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

        Perceptual Barrier

        The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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        The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

        The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

        Attitudinal Barrier

        Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

        The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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        The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

        Language Barrier

        This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

        The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

        The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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        Emotional Barrier

        Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

        The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

        The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

        Cultural Barrier

        Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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        The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

        The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

        Gender Barrier

        Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

        The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

        The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

        And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

        Reference

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