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How to Move Out of State, and Not Feel Like You’re Alone

How to Move Out of State, and Not Feel Like You’re Alone

Moving is a pain, but moving out of state is an entirely different battle. I made my first move my sophomore year of college. I lived in Minnesota all my life, and now after 20 years I was driving over 1,000 miles to Arizona. I then made another move within Arizona after college, only two hours away from where I went to school. Now, two years after graduating I am in yet another city. I now live in St. Louis, Missouri, and will be leaving again within the next 10 months. So, not only do I know a lot about moving, but I also know how absolutely alone it can make you feel. No matter how many times I move, it never gets easier. Moving away from the people you love (family or friends) is never easy. Here is how I continue to move without feeling like I am losing a something each time.

DO: Accept the fact that you are leaving, and probably for a long time

As soon as you can face the fact that you are leaving, the easier it will be for you to actually leave. Denial is an inevitable part of moving. You tell all your friends that you will keep in touch and talk to them just as much as you do now. The sooner you accept that this probably isn’t true, the quicker you will be able to cope with it. You won’t see these people again unless they visit you, or you are back for a visit yourself.

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DON’T: Get upset with people “back home”

In the age of social media it can be difficult not to notice your friends hanging out in all the places that you once frequented. This can make you feel like you are all alone in a new state that you know nothing about. Instead of feeling sad that you missed out, realize that there is a reason why you aren’t there. Bigger and better opportunities have brought you to a new place, and you should be happy about that.

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DO: Take time each week to catch up with a friend or family member

Doing this will make you feel instantly better. Make a point of setting aside an hour, one day a week to talk to someone from where you once lived. Try to make it a different person every week, and then rotate. When you move you will have to make new friends, and that can be stressful. Talking with someone you already know will relieve your stress, while keeping that relationship going.

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DON’T: Isolate yourself

A new city can be scary, but the answer is not to sit inside your house. Get out and meet new people! This can be intimidating if you aren’t an outgoing person, but it is extremely important to not feel alone in a new place. Hopefully you life in an area or apartment complex that has the same age range as you. Some apartment complexes have events for residents to do meet and greets. If you are lucky to live in a place like this, be sure to check them out. If you don’t live in a place that has events for residents, look in your local paper for events and festivals that the city is having. Make sure to go to them. You will meet new people, and get to explore your new city.

DO: Join Clubs/Groups/Activities

The fastest way to meet new people is to join a club or some sort. If you like basketball, join a local basketball team. Same goes for any other sport. If you love to write, go and join your local writers group. I can promise you that your new city has an activity that you can participate in. The best part about meeting people in these groups is that you already have something in common. The best relationships can stem from joining one of these groups.

Moving to a new city is always challenging. Don’t get down, follow the do’s and don’ts and you will make it!

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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