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Everyone Makes Mistakes, This Is How You Can Love and Forgive Yourself

Everyone Makes Mistakes, This Is How You Can Love and Forgive Yourself

It’s undeniable–we all make mistakes. It’s in our nature as humans to fail, whether it’s in our work environment, our family life, or our relationships. We are all doomed to disappoint ourselves at some point, but that doesn’t mean we have to succumb to self-deprecation. Living with a mistake is difficult, and learning to forgive yourself afterwards is even harder, I know. However, if you continue to let your messes define instead of better you, then you’ll only be making your life more troublesome than it would be otherwise. Instead of sobbing into a carton of Ben & Jerry’s and hoping the spoonfuls of milky sugar will somehow take the pain of the past away, follow these guaranteed steps toward self-forgiveness and you’ll be on the right road to recovery in no time. Who knows, you might just find the motivation to close the ice cream lid in here too.

1. Reflect on why you did what you did.

There’s always a reason behind any conscious wrongdoing. Always. Often we get so caught up in our emotions following the incident that we forget to acknowledge the causes leading up to it. If you hit another car while driving, think about what you were doing in the moments before the accident. Were you flipping through radio stations? Were you checking your phone? If not, chances are something else distracted you or blocked your line of vision. Take time to really think about these things and write them down on a piece of paper. It helps to identify the small details before you start looking at the big picture again.

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2. Spend some quality time with yourself.

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    The one thing I’ve found that continuously helps me cope with anything I’m experiencing is taking time to truly be alone, especially when I’m in the self-hatred phase. However, this doesn’t mean sit on your couch and binge-watch TV shows on Netflix. This means get out, go somewhere, and do something with yourself. Call it a “me date” if you must. I find taking runs or walks alone to be the best type of non-prescription medicine, but not everyone finds their therapy in nature. As long as you go spend time alone doing something you love, you can’t go wrong from there.

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    3. Talk to someone who has gone through something similar.

    Don’t get me wrong, spending time alone is great. But it’s not the only thing you should do to deal with your troubles. You need to talk to someone who understands what you’re going through, or find a forum online discussing a related issue to yours. You can even go to a counselor! I promise you, it’s not going to help to keep your feelings to yourself. People are always there to lend you good advice. You just need to seek it out.

    4. Be honest with yourself and those you may have hurt.

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      The most difficult task, besides self-forgiveness, is often the act of admitting the mistake. It’s so easy to come up with excuses or find ways to skirt around the subject. However, at the end of the day, honesty is the best policy and the one that will ultimately set you free. So be open with yourself and the people you may have pained along the way. Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable even if it means the very worst. This goes back to the biblical saying, “Do unto others as you would have others do unto you.” If someone wronged you, you’d want to know so why shouldn’t the same apply the other way around? Think about it. Karmic retribution is a thing.

      5. Have some good ol’ fashioned fun.

      So you’re feeling pretty down and probably guilty. You feel as though it’s only just that you take time to mope about the problem at hand, but the question is for how long? Yes, everyone is allowed to feel the way they’re feeling and act accordingly to their emotions. However, you can’t beat yourself up forever. At some point, you have to tell yourself that what’s past is past and nothing you do right now is going to change that. Instead of continuously reflecting on what could have been done to prevent the mistake, give yourself a break and go have some fun. Go to the movies, hang out with friends, take that exercise class you’ve been dying to try, and for a moment, focus on the present. After all, life is short. Why spend it unhappy?

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      6. Seek self-improvement.

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        The last and final step of the self-forgiveness process comes as a no-brainer, but one we all need to remind ourselves of. When we do something that conflicts with our values or ideals, we get so wrapped up in the temporary nuisance of it all that we forget to see the light at the end of the tunnel so to speak–that light being the result of our reparation. The only way to truly learn to forgive ourselves for mistakes we’ve made is to make amends as necessary. Take your faults as opportunities to seek betterment and work on them from there. It’s not easy, and no one ever said it would be, but learning from failure is what makes us all healthier and happier people in the end. I guarantee that if you start to see your mistakes for the positive change they inspire, you’re bound to find success later on.

        Featured photo credit: Forgive./Tony Webster via flic.kr

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        Last Updated on October 18, 2018

        50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

        50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

        Life is filled with highs and lows —happiness and struggles that will test your resilience and integrity, push you to overcome challenges and leave you with lessons that will make you even stronger on your way up.

        It’s the way you feel and think about yourself, including your expectations and beliefs about what is possible to you, greatly determines everything that happens to you.

        It all starts with your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you transform the quality of your life. (Right, Nancy’s story is a typical example!)

        Below is a list of the best motivational quotes to inspire you to start your day with a blast:

        Quotes for self-assurance

        1. Don’t downgrade your dream just to fit your reality, upgrade your conviction to match your destiny.

          2. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.

            3. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself.

              4. The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others

                5. You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want great, then be great.

                  6. It’s not who you are that holds you behind, it’s who you think your are not.

                    Quotes about positivity

                    7. Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right.

                      8. You should never regret anything in life. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it is experience.

                        9. Falling down is an accident, staying down is a choice.

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                          10. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. The world needs more of that.

                            11. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.

                              12. Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for great.

                                13. Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned from worst times and from the worst mistakes.

                                  Quotes for work and success

                                  14. Don’t talk, just act. Don’t say, just show. Don’t promise, just prove.

                                    15. Never stop doing great just because someone doesn’t give you credit.

                                      16. Discipline is doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to.

                                        17. Work while they sleep. Learn while they party. Save while they spend. Live like they dream.

                                          18. The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire, not things we fear.

                                            19. Never apologize for having high standards, people who really want to be in your life will rise to meet them.

                                              20. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.

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                                                21. Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it, time will pass anyway.

                                                  22. Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.

                                                    23. A hill is just another opportunity to leave your competition behind.

                                                      24. Don’t quit. You’re already in pain. You’re already hurt. Get a reward from it.

                                                        25. Hustle until you no longer need to introduce yourself.

                                                          26. You didn’t come this far only to come this far.

                                                            27. Be selective in your battles for sometimes peace is better than being right.

                                                              28 If we keep doing what we are doing, we’re going to keep getting what we’re getting.

                                                                29. You will never know your limits until you push yourself to them.

                                                                  30. Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do.

                                                                    31. The man on top of the mountain didn’t fall there.

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                                                                      32. If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough.

                                                                        33. If you can’t handle stress, you won’t manage success.

                                                                          34. Don’t be pushed by your problems, be led by your dreams.

                                                                            35. Don’t mistake silence for weakness. Smart people don’t plan big moves out loud.

                                                                              36. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

                                                                                37. Obsessed is the word the lazy use to describe dedicated.

                                                                                  38. You become who you spend your time with.

                                                                                    39. Be stubborn about your goals and flexible about your methods.

                                                                                      40. Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.

                                                                                        41. If you don’t build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.

                                                                                          42. Between stimulus and response is our greatest power –the freedom to choose.

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                                                                                            43. What comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy.

                                                                                              44. Don’t limit your challenges, challenge your limits.

                                                                                                45. Work until your idols become your rivals.

                                                                                                  Quotes about money

                                                                                                  46. Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.

                                                                                                    47. I create new enemies every day, it’s called business.

                                                                                                      48. When you have a Million Dollar vision, don’t surround yourself with 1 cent minds.

                                                                                                        49. You can’t get rich thinking poor.

                                                                                                          50. Doing what is comfortable is rarely profitable.

                                                                                                            51. If you can count your money, work harder.

                                                                                                              If you find yourself feeling lost and frustrated, it’s never too late to change things up. Check out this guide:

                                                                                                              How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

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