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Every 20-Something Needs To Accept These 20 Things

Every 20-Something Needs To Accept These 20 Things

Whether you call it “emerging adulthood” or nothing at all, the 20s are a time of growth and development. (Seriously though, your brain is still developing.) With all that’s being said about Generation Y, one thing is clear. The 20-somethings of today are vastly different from those of earlier generations. As a fellow 20-something (quickly pushing 30), here are some things that I think my fellow 20-somethings need to accept.

That as long as there are 20-somethings who take their time going through the milestones of “adulthood”, there will be 50-somethings worrying and complaining about it.

Unfortunately, it seems Generation Y is a popular target for criticism, often times voiced as concern and even curiosity these days. But if we think back to the children of the ‘60s and ‘70s, we should also think of how they were also criticized. The moral here? To quote Jay-Z, “Go and brush your shoulders off”.

1. You’re Not Old

Yes, you may be naturally inclined to wake up earlier on the weekends. Yes, most of the pop stars are younger than you (but only by like two years, calm down). And yes, people born in 2000 are teenagers now. Does that make you feel old? Definitely. But does it mean you’re actually old? Nope.

2. You Need To Budget

If you’ve already gotten this one figured out – congratulations. You’re a step ahead of a lot of others in our grand Generation Y (myself included). It can be pretty hard to start a budget. Especially if you’re just starting out on this grand adventure some like to call “adulthood”. Sticking to your budget can seem as tedious as waking up consistently at 6 am, but in the long run you’ll be very happy you did – on both aspects.

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3. Your Real Life Does Start Now

I mean, technically real life started the moment you were born. But I’m talking about building a strong foundation for future you. It’s not going to happen overnight on your 30th birthday, it’s something you’ve got to start doing in your 20s. Yes, this is a time to explore what you really want from life and travel, but this is also a time to start investing in your career.

4. You Will Not Always Be Comfortable

You may lose your job, you may lose a family member, or you may have to move back home. You may have to ask for help, but everyone needs help from time to time. Swallow your pride and ask. It may be even as small (hah) as getting a zit the size of Mount Everest. Accept who you are and what you have. Know that life isn’t always going to be perfect. Roll with the uncomfortable situations that life sends your way, because….

5. You Know It Can Always Be Worse

Do you have a roof over your head? Friends and family to comfort you in times of need and celebrate with you in times of joy? What about food to eat? Just remember, no matter how bad it seems it can always be worse. If you think it can’t get any worse, than it will eventually only get better. Accept the worst parts of life, whatever that may be for you, for what they are. Embrace them as much as you embrace the good. Just know, nothing in your life is permanent.

6. You Must Take Risks

Not taking a risk is just as risky as taking a one, so why not try? Risks are scary, especially if the outcome is uncertain. Some of the most successful people wouldn’t be where they are today if they hadn’t taken a chance on themselves or their ideas. It may take time and hard work, but wouldn’t you rather fail having tried then living your life thinking “what if”?

7. You Will Change and So Will Other People

Everyone changes. You’re not the same person you were two years ago and neither are your friends. Accept this and take it for what it is. You may drift apart from some friends, but that is all a part of growing and evolving and riding this crazy thing called life. People come in and out of your life for a reason, rather than dwelling on their leaving focus on what you’ve gained from the experience.

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8. You Don’t Have to Buy It

Seriously, debt is not fun. It affects almost all aspects of your life, from renting an apartment to buying a car. I mean, 46% of 20-somethings have student loan debt, 42% have credit card debt, and 30% have auto loans. So why add on to those statistics? If you want to build your credit with a credit card, you should only buy what you could pay for already. Do you really need the box set of that TV show? Chances are, not really.

9. You Live For You

Everyone is living their own lives at their own paces. Milestones are reached at different places in everyones life. So what if your parents had success at 26? The times were drastically different then. Your friend recently had a child and got married? Be happy for them, but don’t compare your milestones to theirs. Comparing yourself will get you nowhere. Hard work, dedication, and time will.

10. You Will Fail

You will fail and it will suck. It may be the first time you’ve ever failed at something and it may make you feel like you never want to try again. Don’t let it dishearten you. Take the failure in stride and turn it into motivation to succeed and get where you want to be.

11. You Must Eat Well

The habits we develop in our twenties will stay with us for the rest of our lives. Yes, pizza is heaven on earth. I could live off of it too, but I won’t. Start implementing positive diet changes in your life now and you’ll be grateful you did. It’s easier to prevent a health problem than it is to treat it.

12. You Must Sleep

It’s OK to go to sleep early and wake up early. It doesn’t make you ‘old’. We’re more productive in the early hours of the day, so why not take advantage of that with a full nights rest?

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13. You And Your Friends Will Have Less Time For Each Other

Whether it is because of traveling, starting a career, or starting a family, you and your friends will have less time for each other. Make time for each other, but don’t take it personally if they aren’t able to go to the bars every weekend.

14. You Need New Benchmarks

The benchmarks of adulthood used to be: finish school, leave home, get a job, get a spouse and start a family. More and more, these milestones are being reached in a different order or not at all. Take your parents concern in stride, but know that you are on par with your fellow Millenials no matter what stage of “adulthood” you’re at.

15. Your Family Does Matter

Harvard studied two groups of people, those that remained close to their siblings and those that did not. They found that those happiest later in life were ones that had remained close to their siblings.  I believe that this should be applied to the family we choose as well. Keep in contact with all of your loved ones, be it blood related or not, and see the benefits of unconditional love positively affect your life.

16. You Need Love

Love is scary and unsure and almost every other feeling I could possibly list. Don’t be afraid of all the bad that can happen when you fall in love. Take it as an opportunity to grow closer to someone than you’ve ever been before. It may end badly, it may not. Either way, you will grow and learn from experiences that you never would have had if you didn’t take a chance on love.

17. You Must Read Every Once In A While

Want to get into someone’s mind? Open a book. Reading helps as an escape, broadens your mind (and maybe even your vocabulary), and helps you gain a glimpse into another persons mind in a way you can get nowhere else.

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18. You Should Be Alone Sometimes

Find yourself. Embrace yourself. Be truly alone for a little while and realize that it is not the monster under your bed you once thought it was.

19. You Will Be Unappreciated and Disappointed

Often, when we come into adulthood — and out of our parents’ house, we expect the world to fix things the way they would have. Unfortunately, adulthood doesn’t come with gold stars and stickers for a job well done. Get used to this. You must reward yourself and appreciate a job well done on your own. Need a quick me up? Go buy some gold stickers!

20. Your Talent Is Overrated

This may seem harsh, but it is true. You could be the most talented person in your field, but you cannot get anywhere on talent alone. Accept this and work hard to harnessing your talent to get you to the place you would like to be.

Featured photo credit: Eunice / plaits via flickr.com

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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