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Every 20-Something Needs To Accept These 20 Things

Every 20-Something Needs To Accept These 20 Things

Whether you call it “emerging adulthood” or nothing at all, the 20s are a time of growth and development. (Seriously though, your brain is still developing.) With all that’s being said about Generation Y, one thing is clear. The 20-somethings of today are vastly different from those of earlier generations. As a fellow 20-something (quickly pushing 30), here are some things that I think my fellow 20-somethings need to accept.

That as long as there are 20-somethings who take their time going through the milestones of “adulthood”, there will be 50-somethings worrying and complaining about it.

Unfortunately, it seems Generation Y is a popular target for criticism, often times voiced as concern and even curiosity these days. But if we think back to the children of the ‘60s and ‘70s, we should also think of how they were also criticized. The moral here? To quote Jay-Z, “Go and brush your shoulders off”.

1. You’re Not Old

Yes, you may be naturally inclined to wake up earlier on the weekends. Yes, most of the pop stars are younger than you (but only by like two years, calm down). And yes, people born in 2000 are teenagers now. Does that make you feel old? Definitely. But does it mean you’re actually old? Nope.

2. You Need To Budget

If you’ve already gotten this one figured out – congratulations. You’re a step ahead of a lot of others in our grand Generation Y (myself included). It can be pretty hard to start a budget. Especially if you’re just starting out on this grand adventure some like to call “adulthood”. Sticking to your budget can seem as tedious as waking up consistently at 6 am, but in the long run you’ll be very happy you did – on both aspects.

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3. Your Real Life Does Start Now

I mean, technically real life started the moment you were born. But I’m talking about building a strong foundation for future you. It’s not going to happen overnight on your 30th birthday, it’s something you’ve got to start doing in your 20s. Yes, this is a time to explore what you really want from life and travel, but this is also a time to start investing in your career.

4. You Will Not Always Be Comfortable

You may lose your job, you may lose a family member, or you may have to move back home. You may have to ask for help, but everyone needs help from time to time. Swallow your pride and ask. It may be even as small (hah) as getting a zit the size of Mount Everest. Accept who you are and what you have. Know that life isn’t always going to be perfect. Roll with the uncomfortable situations that life sends your way, because….

5. You Know It Can Always Be Worse

Do you have a roof over your head? Friends and family to comfort you in times of need and celebrate with you in times of joy? What about food to eat? Just remember, no matter how bad it seems it can always be worse. If you think it can’t get any worse, than it will eventually only get better. Accept the worst parts of life, whatever that may be for you, for what they are. Embrace them as much as you embrace the good. Just know, nothing in your life is permanent.

6. You Must Take Risks

Not taking a risk is just as risky as taking a one, so why not try? Risks are scary, especially if the outcome is uncertain. Some of the most successful people wouldn’t be where they are today if they hadn’t taken a chance on themselves or their ideas. It may take time and hard work, but wouldn’t you rather fail having tried then living your life thinking “what if”?

7. You Will Change and So Will Other People

Everyone changes. You’re not the same person you were two years ago and neither are your friends. Accept this and take it for what it is. You may drift apart from some friends, but that is all a part of growing and evolving and riding this crazy thing called life. People come in and out of your life for a reason, rather than dwelling on their leaving focus on what you’ve gained from the experience.

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8. You Don’t Have to Buy It

Seriously, debt is not fun. It affects almost all aspects of your life, from renting an apartment to buying a car. I mean, 46% of 20-somethings have student loan debt, 42% have credit card debt, and 30% have auto loans. So why add on to those statistics? If you want to build your credit with a credit card, you should only buy what you could pay for already. Do you really need the box set of that TV show? Chances are, not really.

9. You Live For You

Everyone is living their own lives at their own paces. Milestones are reached at different places in everyones life. So what if your parents had success at 26? The times were drastically different then. Your friend recently had a child and got married? Be happy for them, but don’t compare your milestones to theirs. Comparing yourself will get you nowhere. Hard work, dedication, and time will.

10. You Will Fail

You will fail and it will suck. It may be the first time you’ve ever failed at something and it may make you feel like you never want to try again. Don’t let it dishearten you. Take the failure in stride and turn it into motivation to succeed and get where you want to be.

11. You Must Eat Well

The habits we develop in our twenties will stay with us for the rest of our lives. Yes, pizza is heaven on earth. I could live off of it too, but I won’t. Start implementing positive diet changes in your life now and you’ll be grateful you did. It’s easier to prevent a health problem than it is to treat it.

12. You Must Sleep

It’s OK to go to sleep early and wake up early. It doesn’t make you ‘old’. We’re more productive in the early hours of the day, so why not take advantage of that with a full nights rest?

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13. You And Your Friends Will Have Less Time For Each Other

Whether it is because of traveling, starting a career, or starting a family, you and your friends will have less time for each other. Make time for each other, but don’t take it personally if they aren’t able to go to the bars every weekend.

14. You Need New Benchmarks

The benchmarks of adulthood used to be: finish school, leave home, get a job, get a spouse and start a family. More and more, these milestones are being reached in a different order or not at all. Take your parents concern in stride, but know that you are on par with your fellow Millenials no matter what stage of “adulthood” you’re at.

15. Your Family Does Matter

Harvard studied two groups of people, those that remained close to their siblings and those that did not. They found that those happiest later in life were ones that had remained close to their siblings.  I believe that this should be applied to the family we choose as well. Keep in contact with all of your loved ones, be it blood related or not, and see the benefits of unconditional love positively affect your life.

16. You Need Love

Love is scary and unsure and almost every other feeling I could possibly list. Don’t be afraid of all the bad that can happen when you fall in love. Take it as an opportunity to grow closer to someone than you’ve ever been before. It may end badly, it may not. Either way, you will grow and learn from experiences that you never would have had if you didn’t take a chance on love.

17. You Must Read Every Once In A While

Want to get into someone’s mind? Open a book. Reading helps as an escape, broadens your mind (and maybe even your vocabulary), and helps you gain a glimpse into another persons mind in a way you can get nowhere else.

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18. You Should Be Alone Sometimes

Find yourself. Embrace yourself. Be truly alone for a little while and realize that it is not the monster under your bed you once thought it was.

19. You Will Be Unappreciated and Disappointed

Often, when we come into adulthood — and out of our parents’ house, we expect the world to fix things the way they would have. Unfortunately, adulthood doesn’t come with gold stars and stickers for a job well done. Get used to this. You must reward yourself and appreciate a job well done on your own. Need a quick me up? Go buy some gold stickers!

20. Your Talent Is Overrated

This may seem harsh, but it is true. You could be the most talented person in your field, but you cannot get anywhere on talent alone. Accept this and work hard to harnessing your talent to get you to the place you would like to be.

Featured photo credit: Eunice / plaits via flickr.com

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Last Updated on November 5, 2018

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

Read on to learn the secret.

1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

6. There might just be a misunderstanding

Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

7. You learn to appreciate love as well

A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

8. Do you really need the hate?

The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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