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9 Inspiring Books To Get You Back On Track When You’re Lost

9 Inspiring Books To Get You Back On Track When You’re Lost

There comes a point in all our lives when we are completely lost. No matter what we do or how hard we try, nothing seems to work. There is confusion everywhere and it seems like there is no way around it. This happens to all of us at some point, and it’s during these times that we need some outside intervention to shake us up and get us out of our state. If you are ever faced with such a situation, read any these nine evergreen self-help books to get yourself back on track.

1. The Art of Non-Conformity, Chris Guillebeau

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    “As a general rule, if you don’t know what to do at any given day, spend at least some of your time helping someone else.”

    In this book, the author challenges you to challenge the status quo and make your own decisions for life. He constantly emphasizes how dangerous it is to live the conventional life and urges you to build your own “army.” However, one thing Guillebeau has done exceptionally well is to pinpoint the two questions we should ask ourselves when we do anything: “Why should I do this?” And, “What will happen if I don’t?” Answering these will clarify many great responsibilities for you.

    2. High Expectations Are the Key to Everything, Michael Bergdahl

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      “If you are going to compete and you hope to win, always go into the competition expecting to win and the outcome can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.”

      If you are ever lost in life due to the high expectations of yourself and others, then this book has good news for you. The author says, “We are better people when we expect more of ourselves. And we help others become better when we expect more of them.” Think about it. The core idea of the book is to help you set higher expectations, dream big and make huge goals, because to reach to the top, you have to set high goals and expect more from yourself than anyone else.

      3. Tuesdays with Morrie, Mitch Albom

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        “The culture we have does not make people feel good about themselves. And you have to be strong enough to say if the culture doesn’t work, don’t buy it.”

        This book should be your top priority to find the answers to many questions in life. It has all the life lessons — from death, regret, and family, to emotions, fear, aging, money, love, marriage, culture, forgiveness, and many more. Morrie, the old professor with his great wisdom on life explains to Mitch, his lifelong student, about all life’s blissful and painful experiences when they meet every Tuesday.

        4. Warrior of the Light, Paulo Coelho

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          “Warriors of light often ask themselves what they are doing here. Often they find their lives meaningful.”

          You can’t go wrong if you consider this as the manual of your life. No matter which point of your life you may be stuck on, this book will clear all your doubts. Highly recommended for all the warriors of life.

          5. Who Will Cry When You Die, Robin Sharma

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            “Get up early. There is something very special about the first few hours of morning.”

            These wisdoms from “The Monk who sold his Ferrari” are the simple rules for reaching one’s true potential. These are the simple yet potent ideas for improving the quality of our life and how we can use simple daily rituals to stand apart from the crowd.

            6. The Magic, Rhonda Byrne

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              “Those who don’t believe in magic will never find it.”

              This is the book you need in times of absolute crisis. Often we forget to be grateful when everything is going to plan, but we are lost when everything goes wrong. And the main thing this author reminds us of is to be grateful for what we have. Those who are grateful for something will gain even more, but those who are not will find they lose even that they already have.

              7. The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, Stephen R. Covey

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                “Start with the end in mind.”

                The above quote is just one of the seven habits described in the book but this habit alone is enough to take you from where you are to where you want to be. In life, at all stages, you’ll be lost, defeated and ridiculed. But when you have the end in mind, you will know that these stages are not permanent. These are just the tough times you have to pass in order to achieve the next milestone.

                8. Choose Yourself, James Altucher

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                  “Being honest at every level is really the most effective habit of all if you want to have massive success.”

                  Welcome to the “choose yourself era.” If you have ever stepped back because of fear of others or external validation, then this book will definitely help you take that first step forward before you even finish the final page. The author challenges authority at every stage and asks you to make your own path rather than depend on others for approval. He explains in great detail what it means to choose yourself: to not to keep waiting, fail fast, learn more, succeed like hell, break the rules and make it happen.

                  9. The Speed of Trust, Stephen R. Covey

                  The-Speed-of-Trust-Stephen-Covey

                    “Once you create trust — genuine character and competence based trust — almost everything else falls into place.”

                    Covey places emphasis here on one quality that makes all the difference: trust. He writes that when you go to work, your first responsibility should be to build trust. In everything you do, from relationships to the professional sphere, trust has its effect. And if you have ever stepped back, this might be one of the reasons. Working on building trust can really open many doors for you.

                    Featured photo credit: On the road via picjumbo.com

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                    Dhaval Gajera

                    Author and Speaker.

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                    Last Updated on February 21, 2019

                    The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

                    The Secret to Effective Conflict Resolution: The IBR Approach

                    In business, in social relationships, in family… In whatever context conflict is always inevitable, especially when you are in the leader role. This role equals “make decisions for the best of majority” and the remaining are not amused. Conflicts arise.

                    Conflicts arise when we want to push for a better quality work but some members want to take a break from work.

                    Conflicts arise when we as citizens want more recreational facilities but the Government has to balance the needs to maintain tourism growth.

                    Conflicts are literally everywhere.

                    Avoiding Conflicts a No-No and Resolving Conflicts a Win-Win

                    Avoiding conflicts seem to be a viable option for us. The cruel fact is, it isn’t. Conflicts won’t walk away by themselves. They will, instead, escalate and haunt you back even more when we finally realize that’s no way we can let it be.

                    Moreover, avoiding conflicts will eventually intensify the misunderstanding among the involved parties. And the misunderstanding severely hinders open communication which later on the parties tend to keep things secret. This is obviously detrimental to teamwork.

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                    Some may view conflicts as the last step before arguments. And they thus leave it aside as if they never happen. This is not true.

                    Conflicts are the intersect point between different individuals with different opinions. And this does not necessarily lead to argument.

                    Instead, proper handling of conflicts can actually result in a win-win situation – both parties are pleased and allies are gained. A better understanding between each other and future conflicts are less likely to happen.

                    The IBR Approach to Resolve Conflicts

                    Here, we introduce to you an effective approach to resolve conflicts – the Interest-Based Relational (IBR) approach. The IBR approach was developed by Roger Fisher and William Ury in their 1981 book Getting to Yes. It stresses the importance of the separation between people and their emotions from the problem. Another focus of the approach is to build mutual understanding and respect as they strengthen bonds among parties and can ultimately help resolve conflicts in a harmonious way. The approach suggests a 6-step procedure for conflict resolution:

                    Step 1: Prioritize Good Relationships

                    How? Before addressing the problem or even starting the discussion, make it clear the conflict can result in a mutual trouble and through subsequent respectful negotiation the conflict can be resolved peacefully. And that brings the best outcome to the whole team by working together.

                    Why? It is easy to overlook own cause of the conflict and point the finger to the members with different opinions. With such a mindset, it is likely to blame rather than to listen to the others and fail to acknowledge the problem completely. Such a discussion manner will undermine the good relationships among the members and aggravate the problem.

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                    Example: Before discussion, stress that the problem is never one’s complete fault. Everyone is responsible for it. Then, it is important to point out our own involvement in the problem and state clearly we are here to listen to everyone’s opinions rather than accusing others.

                    Step 2: People Are NOT the Cause of Problem

                    How? State clearly the problem is never one-sided. Collaborative effort is needed. More importantly, note the problem should not be taken personally. We are not making accusations on persons but addressing the problem itself.

                    Why? Once things taken personally, everything will go out of control. People will become irrational and neglect others’ opinions. We are then unable to address the problem properly because we cannot grasp a fuller and clearer picture of the problem due to presumption.

                    Example: In spite of the confronting opinions, we have to emphasize that the problem is not a result of the persons but probably the different perspectives to view it. So, if we try to look at the problem from the other’s perspective, we may understand why there are varied opinions.

                    Step 3: Listen From ALL Stances

                    How? Do NOT blame others. It is of utmost importance. Ask for everyone’s opinions. It is important to let everyone feel that they contribute to the discussion. Tell them their involvement is essential to solve the problem and their effort is very much appreciated.

                    Why? None wants to be ignored. If one feels neglected, it is very likely for he/she to be aggressive. It is definitely not what we hope to see in a discussion. Acknowledging and being acknowledged are equally important. So, make sure everyone has equal opportunity to express their views. Also, realizing their opinions are not neglected, they will be more receptive to other opinions.

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                    Example: A little trick can played here: Invite others to talk first. It is an easy way to let others feel involved and ,more importantly, know their voices are heard. Also, we can show that we are actively listening to them by giving direct eye-contact and nodding. One important to note is that never interrupt anyone. Always let them finish first beforeanother one begins.

                    Step 4: Listen Comes First, Talk Follows

                    How? Ensure everyone has listened to one another points of view. It can be done by taking turn to speak and leaving the discussion part at last. State once again the problem is nothing personal and no accusation should be made.

                    Why? By turn-taking, everyone can finish talking and voices of all sides can be heard indiscriminantly. This can promote willingness to listen to opposing opinions.

                    Example: We can prepare pieces of paper with different numbers written on them. Then, ask different members to pick one and talk according to the sequence of the number. After everyone’s finished, advise everyone to use “I” more than “You” in the discussion period to avoid others thinking that it is an accusation.

                    Step 5: Understand the Facts, Then Address the Problem

                    How? List out ALL the facts first. Ask everyone to tell what they know about the problems.

                    Why? Sometimes your facts are unknown to the others while they may know something we don’t. Missing out on these facts could possibly lead to inaccurate capture of the problem. Also, different known facts can lead to different perception of the matter. It also helps everyone better understand the problem and can eventually help reach a solution.

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                    Example: While everyone is expressing their own views, ask them to write down everything they know that is true to the problem. As soon as everyone has finished, all facts can be noted and everyone’s understanding of the problem is raised.

                    Step 6: Solve the Problem Together

                    How? Knowing what everyone’s thinking, it is now time to resolve the conflict. Up to this point, everyone should have understood the problem better. So, it is everyone’s time to suggest some solutions. It is important not to have one giving all the solutions.

                    Why? Having everyone suggesting their solutions is important as they will not feel excluded and their opinions are considered. Besides, it may also generate more solutions that can better resolve the conflicts. Everyone will more likely be satisfied with the result.

                    Example: After discussion, ask all members to suggest any possible solutions and stress that all solutions are welcomed. State clearly that we are looking for the best outcomes for everyone’s sake rather than battling to win over one another. Then, evaluate all the solutions and pick the one that is in favor of everyone.

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