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7 Ways Learning To Compromise Improves All Your Relationships

7 Ways Learning To Compromise Improves All Your Relationships

Compromise is vital in any relationship, whether it’s with coworkers, friends, family members or your partner. It’s important to know when to stand your ground, but also to know which battles are worth fighting. Check out these seven tips on learning to compromise, and how it will help improve any of your relationships.

1. Don’t always try to be right.

The first problem with fights is that everyone involved wants to be right. We all want to win! It’s understandable that you feel that way, but it’s something you need to stop feeling. When you want to win, you’re not listening to the other side of the argument or conversation. Suspend your need to be right and listen to your partner, friend or coworker.

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2. Let things go.

Needing to be right is just the first thing you need to let go of. Don’t hold so tightly to all the past wrongs the person may have done for you. The saying is “Forgive and forget”, not “Forgive but hold a grudge”. Just because you got into a disagreement with your spouse a few weeks ago doesn’t mean it’s relevant to the one you’re having today.

3. Rethink your expectations.

Have you ever kept an argument going just because you were on a roll? But halfway through, found that you weren’t really passionate about what you were fighting for? It’s tough to admit, but it can happen a lot. One way to avoid this is to stay calm when a discussion arises so you’re not pulled into a fight. Keep your emotions in check and think about what you really want, both from your life and from the relationship. Is it important you stand your ground so firmly, or would everything still be ok if you gave in a little bit? This is important in all relationships, whether it’s with your kids, your siblings, your partner or your coworkers.

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4. Be willing to change.

After you rethink your expectations, be willing to act on the changes as you see fit. It’s one thing to say you’re willing to compromise, but another thing entirely to actually act on that change. A major part of compromising is actually following through with the resolution. This will show others that you’re willing to compromise completely, not just make false promises in order to end a fight.

5. Share your beliefs and emotions.

Compromising is about meeting halfway. Don’t forsake yourself and what you believe in in order to be seen as a great compromiser. Make sure that you express your beliefs and emotions about the situation. Everyone involved in the situation needs to be heard, and the easiest way to do this is to clearly and honestly state their parts. Use “me” and “I” statements so it’s clear that this is how you feel, and that you’re not trying to force your feelings or opinions on others. If your issue is at work, make sure you don’t over-share your emotions — stay professional, but make sure you’re heard loud and clear.

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    6. Show appreciation.

    No matter the resolution of the compromise, make sure you show your appreciation to others involved. Being willing to compromise, instead of fighting until the finish, is an admirable trait. Make sure you show how much you appreciate the other person working with you to find the best solution. Take time to evaluate the solution together and express what you like about it. Being appreciative of the positive social interaction and how working together to find the best solution made you feel.

    7. Keep an open mind.

    You made it through a compromise intact! How does it feel? Remember this for next time. It’s important to keep an open mind — not only for future compromises, but also in all future interactions. Keeping an open mind, being willing to change your expectations, and not trying to be right in the first place might help you avoid arguments in the future. But even if you can’t — at least you know how to compromise!

    Featured photo credit: mohd ashek mansor via flickr.com

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    Last Updated on November 5, 2018

    8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

    8 Powerful Reasons to Love Your Enemies

    We’ve all got our enemies; people who take pleasure in causing us pain and misery. Sometimes, the development of an enemy is due to certain differences in your characters and events have led to that. Other times, some people end up hating you for apparently no reason at all.

    Regardless of how you got this enemy, as opposed to the paradigm of fighting fire with fire, consider the following reasons and see why you should actually appreciate your enemies. This article will show you not only how to not be bothered by your enemies, but how to actually foster love for them.

    Read on to learn the secret.

    1. It’s a practical lesson in anger management

    To be honest, your enemies are the best people to help you understand your sense of anger management. When it might be true that your enemies have a way of bringing out the worst in you as regards anger, it is also true that they can help you in your quest to have that anger managed. You can’t get truly angry at someone you love and it is only in that time when you get truly annoyed that you learn how to manage it.

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    Anger management is more effective when it is in practice and not in theory

    Your enemies are like the therapists who you need, but actually don’t want. Inasmuch as you might want to hate them, they provide you an opportunity to control the anger impulse that you have.

    2. It’s an opportunity for healthy competition

    You might not know it, but your enemies make for great rivals as they help harness the competitor in you (sometimes, you might not even know or bee conversant with this competitive side until you come across an adversary). You get the right motivation to compete and this can go a long way to spur you to victory.

    However, while doing so, it is also essential that you remember not to become a worse version of yourself while competing. Working against an adversary is tricky, and you need to ensure that you don’t cause harm to yourself or your morals in the process. Healthy competition is all you need to get out of this.

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    3. Their negative comments can help you make a breakthrough

    It is true that your enemies never really have much good to say about you. However, in as much as they might be talking out of a place of hate, there might be some truth to what they’re saying.

    To wit, whenever you hear something mean or nasty from an enemy, you might want to take a step back and evaluate yourself. There is a chance that what this enemy is saying is true and coming to face that fact is a major step in helping you to become a better person overall. This is another testament to the fact that enemies can be therapists in their own way.

    4. Enemies can also be powerful allies

    Loving your enemies can also mean making an effort to interact and make peace with them. In the end, if you are able to establish some common ground and patch things up, you’ll have succeeded in making another friend. And who doesn’t need friends?

    This can also help you in working with people in the long run. You get to hone your inter-personal skills, and that can be a big plus to your ledger.

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    5. It gives you the ability to realize positivity

    In a multitude of negativity, a speck of positivity always seems to find its way through.

    Sometimes, a knowledge of the fact that you have enemies will also help you to focus on the many positives and good things that are in your life. A lot of times, we neglect what really matters in life. This can be due to being overly concerned with the enemies we have.

    However, it is also possible for this acknowledgement to spur you to take a step back and appreciate the goo things (and people who surround you).

    6. There might just be a misunderstanding

    Sometimes, the reason why you have an enemy might be something very innocuous. You might not have known the cause of this fractured relationship and your enemy will help complete the picture.

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    Simply approaching them will help you to understand the reason for the fracture. This, in turn, can help you to work towards healing your relationship moving forward. Misunderstandings happen, and you need to be able to work around them.

    7. You learn to appreciate love as well

    A constant reminder of the fact that there are enemies will also help you not to take those who love you for granted. Love and hate are two opposing emotions and it is possible for one to momentarily overshadow the other.

    However, while you’ll always have enemies, there will also always be people who love you. These people need to be appreciated for what they do for you. Never let the hate projected to you from your enemies take the place of that.

    8. Do you really need the hate?

    The truth is that enemies bring only toxic emotions and generate bad reactions from you. If you’re truly to live a prosperous life, you can’t really be carrying all this baggage around.

    Hate is bad and you should try all you can to get rid of it. It is a well-known fact that nobody can get really far in life while carrying a lot of emotional baggage. Well, hate is the biggest form of emotional baggage there is.

    Featured photo credit: rawpixel via unsplash.com

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