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7 Things Modern Women Look for in a Man

7 Things Modern Women Look for in a Man

Today’s woman isn’t interested in the 1950’s notion of being barefoot and pregnant. Instead, women all over the world are taking charge of their lives by earning college degrees and pioneering entrepreneurship. Surely, if a guy is interested in a woman of ‘the now’, he must be prepared to play, all in the name of love. In this article, you’ll find 7 head-turning things that modern women look for in a man.

1. Similar Values.

Opposites still do attract in this day and age; kudos to the couples who benefit from this old adage. For everyone else: taking a risk on a polar opposite isn’t always worth the thrill. When having found yourself interested in modern woman, it’s beneficial to do the minimal research to see if she’ll even be intrigued by your hello. If you see her in passing every day, pay attention to the obvious things about her – if she drinks coffee, carries a briefcase, has children – and strike a conversation about what those things mean to you, too.

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2. A Visionary.

In the 1950’s, it was the norm to find a “good job”, work it for 50 years and retire comfortably. Unfortunately (and in some cases, thankfully), we don’t have that same “luxury”. While it’s expected that you should have a legal and viable source of income, modern women are interested in your next move. Are you crazy enough to turn your passion into a business or nonprofit organization? If so, how do you expect to do this within the next 5 to 10 years? Showing your woman that you’re a no-holds-barred go-getter is exciting and is bound to gain her interest, respect and loyalty.

3. A Conversationalist.

Talking online is the convenient way of meeting prospects and making love connections. These days, everyone has at least one social networking profile that they use to post pictures and interesting things about themselves occasionally. Before using this as your only method of communication, it’s a great idea to assess how well you can hold a real conversation, in person. A modern woman can pick up on a fake a mile away, so in between chats and IM, brush up on your conversation strategies. Be knowledgeable in the things that she’s interested in, along with world events to show off your cultured side.

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4. Boss in his own right.

Taken literally, a boss makes his own rules in the boardroom. While this is admirable, a boss must also be able to govern his own life and handle tough situations outside of the boardroom. Being able to command attention without even trying to is breath-taking and shows a certain alpha-ness, if you will. Modern women find this attractive, leading them to believe that you’ll be a great partner along the way.

5. Ability to Teach.

Your modern woman may be well-educated and experienced. While these are awesome qualities to have, a woman loves it when a man can teach her something worth learning. This doesn’t mean that you have to be a professor or expert in a particular area. No. This is the time when you put your fantastic listening skills to use to “listen for things she doesn’t mean for you to hear” and casually appeal to the student in her. Let’s say she mentions that she’s always wanted to go fishing one night. Log that in your memory and give her a surprise fishing date when she least expects it.

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6. Spirituality.

At the end of the day, do you show gratitude for your life? Are you genuinely happy to be in the place you’re in with the people around you? Expressing this gratitude to your higher power is intriguing to women looking to spend lifelong time with you. This shows that you’re in tune with a sense of self and that you may also have a kind heart. (This is also a great quality to teach children, if you plan to have them.)

7. Balancing Act.

It’s such a turn-on to be with an affluent man. Most women dream of a man who has the ability to take care of her. However, not knowing how to balance such power with home life is the ultimate no-no. Instead of using money as your focus when meeting women, tell her how easy it is for you to give yourself a monthly allowance, manage quality time, and still make time for the important people and things in your life. This sounds like she has a place to fit in your life and that you’ll be supportive to her needs and wants, as opposed to presenting the old cliché of “I have money”. It also shows you have self-discipline, respect for her place, and a future that is secured, all of which are admirable.

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The most important thing that you can be with any woman is supportive. Regardless of her titles and accolades, at the end of the day, a lady wants to come home to let her hair down and be loved on.

Featured photo credit: WHAT MEN LOOK AT FIRST? WRONG ANSWER! via cosmoladies.com

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The Gentle Art of Saying No

The Gentle Art of Saying No

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

  1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
  2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
  3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
  4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
  5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
  6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
  7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
  8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
  9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
  10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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