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5 Things You Do That Are Seriously Affecting Your Relationships

5 Things You Do That Are Seriously Affecting Your Relationships

We all know that relationships are hard work, but they don’t have to be. Here are some much needed solutions to the things you are doing that seriously affect your relationships.

You are clingy.

Sorry to say it, but this is the number one thing that is affecting your relationships. We all know what it’s like to have someone cling to everything you do. At first it can be considered cute. The other person might think you really like them and really enjoy spending time with them. BUT eventually it gets to be too much. Being clingy can lead to the exact opposite of what you are going for. It can end up pushing the other person away.

So what is an example of being clingy? Trust me there are many, but lets stick with the most common. For one, you text or call your significant other more than an acceptable amount of times in one hour. It’s totally fine to see how someone is doing throughout the day. However, you don’t want to do this by sending 15 text messages in one hour asking the same questions. It’s okay to go a few hours without constant communication. You don’t want to be an anoyance to your boyfriend or girlfriend, and you definitely don’t want to seem demanding of all their time. Another good example of being clingy is pressuring someone to say they love you, and you haven’t been together very long. Although you might feel that way, don’t force it on them.

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What’s the solution, then, to being clingy? Give them space. You don’t need to change who you are to be less clingy. Let them text or call you sometimes. Every relationship has a natural flow, and you should let yours have one too. Realize that space doesn’t mean the other person doesn’t care about you as much as you care about them. Take the time you would be focusing on them to focus on yourself. This will create a much healthier relationship, and help you get rid of the label clingy.

You are jealous/overprotective.

At times this can be just as bad as being clingy. Being a jealous person in a relationship can really put a strain on things. Sometimes being jealous is just a reaction, and you can’t always help it. Say your significant other is getting hit on right in front of you; this may cause jealousy no matter what you do. However, you don’t need to get worked up about it and cause a scene. Take it as a compliment. That’s your man/woman, and if you are in a trusting committed relationship they should react accordingly. An example of being jealous/overprotective is when you get mad at your bf/gf for having a night out with their friends (without you). You get jealous and tell them they can’t go, or you invite yourself, or even just show up. First of all this is not a good look for you. Now the friends will have an impression of you being a jealous person as well.

What is a solution to being jealous/overprotective? Take a breath before you react. You might be a jealous person, but if you want this to stop affecting your relationships then you need to think before you speak. Ask yourself some questions: Do you trust them? If not, then you really shouldn’t be with them anyways. Is it really as serious as I am making it? If not, don’t cause an argument that doesn’t need to happen.

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You need constant reassurance of love and affection.

It’s normal to want to know how your significant other feels about you. However, constantly asking them is not the way to go about it. If this is you, then you probably ask multiple times how they feel about you. Do you love me? How much do you love me? Are you sure? The list goes on. You also likely need to have constant affection from them (kisses, holding hands, ect.). This can become overbearing for the other person, and will likely lead to the demise of your relationship.

What is the solution to needing constant reassurance? This might take some time, because there is likely an unresolved issue within yourself. No matter what the issue is, take some time and figure out who you truly are. Once you figure out who you are, what makes you tick, what your greatest assets are, ect. then you can have a serious relationship again. When you know your self worth, you won’t need constant reassurance of how your bf/gf feels about you.

You give the impression you only care about sex.

Ah, here it is, the thing that is affecting you from having a real relationship. We all know that sex is an important part of any committed relationship. However, if you give off the impression that sex is all you care about–you probably wont last long.. in the relationship. If this is you, you might even be known as a “friend with benefits,” but you never get further than that. No real feeling develop because you don’t allow them to.

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What’s the solution to this problem affecting your relationships? It’s simple – open up to someone without making everything about sex. You will be amazed to find out how much better sex is when there are feelings attached. So, open up to the possibility that there is more to a relationship than sex.

You are terrified of being alone.

If this is you, you jump from one relationship to the next. You currently have a backup plan in case your current relationship doesn’t work out. This isn’t just related to a committed relationship, it is also true for your friendships. You are literally never alone. This starts to affect your relationships because you don’t have any time apart. It could also cause problems because you seem insecure, and that in itself is enough baggage to ruin a relationship.

What’s the solution to being terrified of being alone? It might sound crazy… but you should spend some time alone. It will be extremely scary at first, but it will be worth it in the end. You always hear people talking about how you can’t love someone else if you don’t love yourself first—this is so true! Time alone with yourself will help you begin to love yourself. Like I said before, figure yourself out first. A relationship won’t last if you rely on the other person to make you feel good all the time. Also, having time away from each other is good. It helps the relationship, and makes the other person realize how much they care about you when you’re gone.

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Featured photo credit: N/A via mrg.bz

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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