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If You Don’t Stop Doing These, You’ll Waste the Rest of Your Life

If You Don’t Stop Doing These, You’ll Waste the Rest of Your Life
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The modern world is fast paced and time often seems to slip by with us barely noticing. It’s for that reason that it’s important that we don’t spend time or attention on things that are frivolous, negative or just plan stupid. Check out our comprehensive guide to things you shouldn’t be wasting your time on, and see if there’s anything on this guide that you can cut out of your life.

1. Putting Makeup on for the gym and sports

    It looks weird and it’s only going to melt off, which negates the purpose of putting it on in the first place.

    2. Hitting ‘snooze’

      Get your lazy butt out of bed. You set your alarm for a legitimate reason.

      3. Constantly refreshing Facebook

        Try living life rather than waiting for an acquaintance to update you on how their lunch is going.

        4. Doing things you hate

          Life is far too short to waste your time on doing something you hate. By that, I mean doing unnecessary things. You should probably still wash up and whatnot.

          5. Checking your phone constantly

            Did you hear your message tone? Did it ring? If you answered ‘no’ to either of those questions, put the phone down and back away slowly. No, you don’t need it when you go to the bathroom.

            6. Dwelling on problems

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              In the immortal words of Vanilla Ice, “If there was a problem. Yo, I’ll solve it.” Instead of wasting time by dwelling on a problem, work out what you can do to fix it.

              7. Worrying

                It’s similar to above. Stop worrying and start working towards a solution.

                8. Caring what others think

                  Unless you’re getting good advice from people you love, disregard it. It doesn’t matter what other people think of you, you need to stay true to yourself. Don’t waste your time, thoughts, and energy on what others think. Be proud to be yourself.

                  9. Staying online late into the night

                    It’s not only a waste of time now, but will probably result in you sleeping half the day away tomorrow, or being unproductive at work or school. There’s nothing so important that you need to stay online for it until 3 am. No, not even Tumblr.

                    10. Celebrity culture

                      Stop giving a flying spaghetti monster about the Krapdashians, or how you look compared to the entirety of Hollywood. They’re all Photoshopped. Thighs are supposed to touch.

                      11. Procrastinating

                        Just do it.

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                        12. Playing romantic games

                          You can waste years not telling someone how you feel out of fear. Grow a pair of ovaries and tell them. If they’re not digging it, at least you’ll have the chance to move on. If they feel the same the only regret you’ll have is the days, weeks, and months you could have already had together.

                          13. Feeding the Trolls

                            It’s what they want. Stop before you go into a rage blackout.

                            14. Photographing everything

                              Instead of trying to document your life, live it. The internet will actually survive without the bathroom selfie of you and a ham sandwich, or whatever it is that you’re into.

                              15. Holding Grudges

                                Life’s too short! Forgive and be positive.

                                16. Complaining

                                  Complaining really won’t get you anywhere, and the only person who it’s hurting is you. Start thinking positively. Figure out how to make your life more complaint-free.

                                  17. Eating Out of Boredom

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                                    This kind of eating is a bad idea all-around. If you’re bored, it means you’re wasting time. Find something productive to do. Put some work in towards a goal or a dream. These would be much better uses of your time than visiting the fridge for the seventh time this hour.

                                    18. Waiting for something to happen

                                      The world isn’t going to wait for you. Go after what you want.

                                      19. Constantly updating your status

                                        This is not living. No one cares that your left flip flop broke on the way to the bin.

                                        20. Indecision

                                          Indecision often stems from fear. Deep down, you’re likely to know what decision you want to make.

                                          21. Hanging around negative people

                                            The people in your life shouldn’t be a constant stream of negativity. Give them the figurative (or even literal) bird, and find some positive people to spend time with. You’ll feel a whole lot happier and enjoy life more.

                                            22. Watching TV

                                              A little TV is okay, but it shouldn’t be the center of your universe. Instead of watching other people have adventures, have some of your own.

                                              23. Watching Reality TV

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                                                If you’re watching TV, make it something halfway decent. Don’t waste your time with frivolous half-scripted crap that networks pump out so they don’t have to pay real writers. Avoid the bottom shelf stuff. There’s too many great shows out there.

                                                24. Pinning things

                                                  Stop day-dreaming of amazing things on Pinterest, and start doing them.

                                                  25. Brands

                                                    All that expensive crap you covet really isn’t that special, despite the heinous price tag. They’re likely to be exploiting just as many third-world children as the cheap labels. Get over brand name obsession and spend your time and money on something worthier.

                                                    26. Gossip

                                                      I know it can be juicy and kind of fun, but it really gets you nowhere.

                                                      27. Unrequited love

                                                        This can be one of the hardest things to let go of, but you simply must. Unrequited means that you probably know that they’re not interested. Why waste your time on that when you can be working on being happy? When you find the right person for you, you’ll lament all the wasted time spent on someone who didn’t care.

                                                        28. Popping pimples

                                                          Do you really want to end up like the crater-faced guy from Grease? I didn’t think so.

                                                          29. Being glued to your phone

                                                            Not only does this make you miss the world going on around you, it’s also just plain rude in a social situation.

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                                                            30. Reading This

                                                              Just kidding, I write amazing things worthy of your time.

                                                              More by this author

                                                              Tegan Jones

                                                              Tegan is a passionate journalist, writer and editor. She writes about lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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                                                              Last Updated on July 20, 2021

                                                              How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

                                                              How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)
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                                                              You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

                                                              Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

                                                              Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

                                                              Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

                                                              1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

                                                              According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

                                                              “Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

                                                              Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

                                                              Warming up

                                                              If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

                                                              If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

                                                              Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

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                                                              1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
                                                              2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
                                                              3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

                                                              Stay hydrated

                                                              Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

                                                              To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

                                                              Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

                                                              Meditate

                                                              Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

                                                              Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

                                                              Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

                                                              Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

                                                              2. Focus on your goal

                                                              One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

                                                              Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

                                                              Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

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                                                              Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

                                                              If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

                                                              3. Convert negativity to positivity

                                                              There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

                                                              ‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

                                                              It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

                                                              Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

                                                              Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

                                                              Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

                                                              4. Understand your content

                                                              Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

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                                                              However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

                                                              “No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

                                                              Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

                                                              Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

                                                              One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

                                                              5. Practice makes perfect

                                                              Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

                                                              In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

                                                              Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

                                                              6. Be authentic

                                                              There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

                                                              Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

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                                                              Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

                                                              To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

                                                              With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

                                                              Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

                                                              7. Post speech evaluation

                                                              Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

                                                              Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

                                                              We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

                                                              You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

                                                              Improve your next speech

                                                              As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

                                                              Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

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                                                              • How did I do?
                                                              • Are there any areas for improvement?
                                                              • Did I sound or look stressed?
                                                              • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
                                                              • Was I saying “um” too often?
                                                              • How was the flow of the speech?

                                                              Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

                                                              If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

                                                              Reference

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