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If You Don’t Stop Doing These, You’ll Waste the Rest of Your Life

If You Don’t Stop Doing These, You’ll Waste the Rest of Your Life

The modern world is fast paced and time often seems to slip by with us barely noticing. It’s for that reason that it’s important that we don’t spend time or attention on things that are frivolous, negative or just plan stupid. Check out our comprehensive guide to things you shouldn’t be wasting your time on, and see if there’s anything on this guide that you can cut out of your life.

1. Putting Makeup on for the gym and sports

    It looks weird and it’s only going to melt off, which negates the purpose of putting it on in the first place.

    2. Hitting ‘snooze’

      Get your lazy butt out of bed. You set your alarm for a legitimate reason.

      3. Constantly refreshing Facebook

        Try living life rather than waiting for an acquaintance to update you on how their lunch is going.

        4. Doing things you hate

          Life is far too short to waste your time on doing something you hate. By that, I mean doing unnecessary things. You should probably still wash up and whatnot.

          5. Checking your phone constantly

            Did you hear your message tone? Did it ring? If you answered ‘no’ to either of those questions, put the phone down and back away slowly. No, you don’t need it when you go to the bathroom.

            6. Dwelling on problems

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              In the immortal words of Vanilla Ice, “If there was a problem. Yo, I’ll solve it.” Instead of wasting time by dwelling on a problem, work out what you can do to fix it.

              7. Worrying

                It’s similar to above. Stop worrying and start working towards a solution.

                8. Caring what others think

                  Unless you’re getting good advice from people you love, disregard it. It doesn’t matter what other people think of you, you need to stay true to yourself. Don’t waste your time, thoughts, and energy on what others think. Be proud to be yourself.

                  9. Staying online late into the night

                    It’s not only a waste of time now, but will probably result in you sleeping half the day away tomorrow, or being unproductive at work or school. There’s nothing so important that you need to stay online for it until 3 am. No, not even Tumblr.

                    10. Celebrity culture

                      Stop giving a flying spaghetti monster about the Krapdashians, or how you look compared to the entirety of Hollywood. They’re all Photoshopped. Thighs are supposed to touch.

                      11. Procrastinating

                        Just do it.

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                        12. Playing romantic games

                          You can waste years not telling someone how you feel out of fear. Grow a pair of ovaries and tell them. If they’re not digging it, at least you’ll have the chance to move on. If they feel the same the only regret you’ll have is the days, weeks, and months you could have already had together.

                          13. Feeding the Trolls

                            It’s what they want. Stop before you go into a rage blackout.

                            14. Photographing everything

                              Instead of trying to document your life, live it. The internet will actually survive without the bathroom selfie of you and a ham sandwich, or whatever it is that you’re into.

                              15. Holding Grudges

                                Life’s too short! Forgive and be positive.

                                16. Complaining

                                  Complaining really won’t get you anywhere, and the only person who it’s hurting is you. Start thinking positively. Figure out how to make your life more complaint-free.

                                  17. Eating Out of Boredom

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                                    This kind of eating is a bad idea all-around. If you’re bored, it means you’re wasting time. Find something productive to do. Put some work in towards a goal or a dream. These would be much better uses of your time than visiting the fridge for the seventh time this hour.

                                    18. Waiting for something to happen

                                      The world isn’t going to wait for you. Go after what you want.

                                      19. Constantly updating your status

                                        This is not living. No one cares that your left flip flop broke on the way to the bin.

                                        20. Indecision

                                          Indecision often stems from fear. Deep down, you’re likely to know what decision you want to make.

                                          21. Hanging around negative people

                                            The people in your life shouldn’t be a constant stream of negativity. Give them the figurative (or even literal) bird, and find some positive people to spend time with. You’ll feel a whole lot happier and enjoy life more.

                                            22. Watching TV

                                              A little TV is okay, but it shouldn’t be the center of your universe. Instead of watching other people have adventures, have some of your own.

                                              23. Watching Reality TV

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                                                If you’re watching TV, make it something halfway decent. Don’t waste your time with frivolous half-scripted crap that networks pump out so they don’t have to pay real writers. Avoid the bottom shelf stuff. There’s too many great shows out there.

                                                24. Pinning things

                                                  Stop day-dreaming of amazing things on Pinterest, and start doing them.

                                                  25. Brands

                                                    All that expensive crap you covet really isn’t that special, despite the heinous price tag. They’re likely to be exploiting just as many third-world children as the cheap labels. Get over brand name obsession and spend your time and money on something worthier.

                                                    26. Gossip

                                                      I know it can be juicy and kind of fun, but it really gets you nowhere.

                                                      27. Unrequited love

                                                        This can be one of the hardest things to let go of, but you simply must. Unrequited means that you probably know that they’re not interested. Why waste your time on that when you can be working on being happy? When you find the right person for you, you’ll lament all the wasted time spent on someone who didn’t care.

                                                        28. Popping pimples

                                                          Do you really want to end up like the crater-faced guy from Grease? I didn’t think so.

                                                          29. Being glued to your phone

                                                            Not only does this make you miss the world going on around you, it’s also just plain rude in a social situation.

                                                            30. Reading This

                                                              Just kidding, I write amazing things worthy of your time.

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                                                              Tegan Jones

                                                              Tegan is a passionate journalist, writer and editor. She writes about lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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                                                              Last Updated on August 19, 2019

                                                              How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

                                                              How to Be True to Yourself and Live the Life You Want

                                                              We live in a world that constantly tells us what to do, how to act, what to be. Knowing how to be true to yourself and live the life you want can be a challenge.

                                                              When someone asks how we are, we assume that the person does not mean the question sincerely, for it would lead to an in depth conversation. So telling them that you are good or fine, even if you’re not, is the usual answer.

                                                              In an ideal world, we would stop and truly listen. We wouldn’t be afraid to be ourselves. Instead, when we answer about how we are doing, our mask, the persona we show the world, tightens. Sometimes even more so than it might have been before. Eventually, it becomes hard to take off, even when you’re alone.

                                                              Imagine a world where we asked how someone was doing and they really told us. Imagine a world where there were no masks, only transparency when we talked to one another.

                                                              If you want to live in a world that celebrates who you are, mistakes and all, take off the mask. It doesn’t mean you have to be positive or fine all the time.

                                                              According to a Danish psychologist, Svend Brinkman, we expect each other to be happy and fine every second, and we expect it of ourselves. And that “has a dark side.”[1] Positive psychology can have its perks but not at the expense at hiding how you truly feel in order to remain seemingly positive to others.

                                                              No one can feel positive all the time and yet, that is what our culture teaches us to embrace. We have to unlearn this. That said, telling others you are ‘“fine”’ all the time is actually detrimental to your wellbeing, because it stops you from being assertive, from being authentic or your truest self.

                                                              When you acknowledge a feeling, it leads you to the problem that’s causing that feeling; and once you identify the problem, you can find a solution to it. When you hide that feeling, you stuff it way down so no one can help you.You can’t even help yourself.

                                                              Feelings are there for one reason: to be felt. That doesn’t mean you have to act on that feeling. It just means that you start the process of problem solving so you can live the life you want.

                                                              1. Embrace Your Vulnerability

                                                              When you are your true self, you can better self-advocate or stand up for what you need. Your self-expression matters, and you should value your voice. It’s okay to need things, it’s okay to speak up, and it’s okay not to be okay.

                                                              Telling someone you are simply “fine” when you are not, does your story and your journey a great disservice. Being true to yourself entails embracing all aspects of your existence.

                                                              When you bring your whole self to the table, there is nothing that you can’t beat. Here’re 7 benefits of being vulnerable you should learn.

                                                              Can you take off the mask? This is the toughest thing anyone can do. We have learned to wait until we are safe before we start to be authentic.

                                                              In relationships especially, this can be hard. Some people avoid vulnerability at any cost. And in our relationship with ourselves, we can look in the mirror and immediately put on the mask.

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                                                              It all starts with your story. You have been on your own unique journey. That journey has led you here, to the person you are today. You have to be unafraid, and embrace all aspects of that journey.

                                                              You should seek to thrive, not just survive. That means you do not have to compete or compare yourself with anyone.

                                                              Authenticity means you are enough. It’s enough to be who you are to get what you want.

                                                              What if for the first time ever, you were real? What if you said what you wanted to say, did what you wanted to do, and didn’t apologize for it?

                                                              You were assertive, forthcoming in your opinions or actions to stand for what is right for you, (rather than being passive or aggressive) in doing so. You didn’t let things get to you. You knew you had something special to offer.

                                                              That’s where we all should be.

                                                              So, answer me this:

                                                              How are you, really?

                                                              And know that no matter the answer, you should still be accepted.

                                                              Bravery is in the understanding that you still may not be accepted for your truth.

                                                              Bravery is knowing you matter even when others say that you do not.

                                                              Bravery is believing in yourself when all evidence counters doing so (i.e. past failures or losses)

                                                              Bravery is in being vulnerable while knowing vulnerability is a sign of strength.

                                                              It’s taking control.

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                                                              2. Choose Your Attitude in Adversity

                                                              You can take control of your destiny and live the life you want by being true to yourself. You can start anytime. You can start today.

                                                              You can start with one day at a time, just facing what happens that day. Most of us get overwhelmed when faced with the prospect of a big change. Even if the only thing we change is our attitude.

                                                              In one instant, you can become a different person with a change of attitude. When you take control of your attitude, you become able to better understand what is around you. This allows you to move forward.

                                                              Originally, you may have had a life plan. It could have started when you were little; you were hoping to become a mermaid, doctor, astronaut or all three when you grew up. You were hoping to be someone. You were hoping to be remembered.

                                                              You can still dream those dreams, but eventually reality sets in. Obstacles and struggles arise. You set on a different path when the last one didn’t work out. You think of all the “shoulds” in your life in living the life you want. You should be doing this…should be doing that…

                                                              Clayton Barbeau, psychologist, coined the term “shoulding yourself.’[2] When we are set on one path and find ourselves doing something different. It becomes all the things you should be doing rather than seeing the opportunities right in front of you.

                                                              But in all this disarray, did you lose sight of the real you?

                                                              It may be in our perceived failures and blunders that we lose sight of who we are, because we try to maintain position and status.

                                                              In being who we really are and achieving what we really want, we need to be resilient: How to Build Resilience to Face What Life Throws at You

                                                              It means that we do not see all possibilities of what might happen, but must trust ourselves to begin again, and continue to build the life we want. In the face of adversity, you must choose your attitude.

                                                              Can attitude overcome adversity? It certainly helps. While seeking to be true to yourself and live the life you want, you will have to face a fact:

                                                              Change will happen.

                                                              Whether that change is good or bad is unique to each person and their perspective.

                                                              You might have to start over, once, twice, a few times. It doesn’t mean that everything will be okay, but that you will be okay. What remains or should remain is the true you. When you’ve lost sight of that, you’ve lost sight of everything.

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                                                              And then, you rebuild. Moment after moment, day after day. We all have a choice, and in this moment, that matters.

                                                              You can choose to have a positive attitude, seeing the silver lining in each situation and, where there is none, the potential for one. Maybe that silver lining is you and what you will do with the situation. How will you use it for something good?

                                                              That’s how you can tap into yourself and your power. Sometimes it happens by accident, sometimes on purpose. It can happen when we aren’t even looking for it, or it can be your only focus. Everyone gets there differently.

                                                              You can rise, or you can remain. Your choice.

                                                              When the worst happens, you can rely on your authenticity to pull you through. That’s because Self Advocacy, speaking up to let others know what you need, is part of finding the real you.

                                                              There is nothing wrong with asking for help. Or sometimes, helping others can help us deal with the pain of a hurtful situation. You decide how you’re going to help others, and suddenly, you become your best self.

                                                              3. Do What Makes You Happy When No One’s Looking

                                                              Being the best version of you has nothing to do with your success or your status. It has everything to do with your Character, what you do when no one’s looking.

                                                              In order to create the life you want, you have to be the person you want to be. Faking it till you make it is just a way to white knuckle it through your journey. You have the fire inside of you to make things right, to put the pieces together, to live authentically. And Character is how you get there.

                                                              If you fall down and you help another up while you’re down there, it’s like you rise twice.

                                                              Along with attitude, your character is about the choices you make rather than what happens to you.

                                                              Yes, it’s about doing the right thing even when obstacles seem insurmountable.  It’s about using that mountain you’ve been given to show others it can be moved.  It’s about being unapologetically you, taking control, choosing your attitude in adversity and being the best version of you to create the life you want.

                                                              How do you know what you really want? Is it truly status or success?

                                                              Unfortunately, these things do not always bring happiness. And aspects of our image or “performance driven existence” may not achieve satisfaction. Materialism is part of our refusal to accept ourselves as enough. All the things we use to repress our true selves are about being enough.

                                                              “Enoughness” is what we truly seek, but ego gets in the way.

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                                                              Ego is the perception of self as outer worth. It’s not REAL self worth.

                                                              Ego represses our true self with a new self— the self of chasing ‘“Am I ever enough?”’ questions. And instead of filling our true selves with self-love and acceptance, when we “should ourselves” and chase “enoughness,” we feed the ego or our image.

                                                              It’s important to realize YOU ARE ENOUGH, without all the material trappings.

                                                              Stanford psychologist Meagan O’Reilly describes the damage of not thinking we are enough. One of her tactics for combating this is to complete the sentence,[3]

                                                              “If I believed I were already enough, I’d ____”

                                                              What would you do if you felt you were enough?

                                                              By believing you are enough, you can live the life you want.

                                                              So many fake it to try to get there, and they end up losing themselves when they lose more and more touch with their Authenticity.

                                                              Final Thoughts

                                                              By being yourself, you are being brave. By acknowledging all you can be, you tell the universe that you can until you believe it too. The steps are easy, and you are worth it. All of it is about the purpose you are leading and the passion that is your fuel.

                                                              Being true to yourself is all about mastering how to live life authentically rather than faking or forcing it. Having the life you want (and deserve) is about being trusting in yourself and the purpose you are living for. Both need passion behind it, fueling it each second, or you will experience burn out.

                                                              When you are authentic, you can call the road you walk your own. When you live your life for you and not just the results of all your actions (faking it till you make it), you can let go of what you don’t need. This clarifies and pushes purpose to you, living for something that is greater than you.

                                                              You will find that making decisions based on what will actually achieve your goals, will help you attain the life you want, and your success with each step, will allow you to enjoy the process. Good luck!

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                                                              Featured photo credit: Ariana Prestes via unsplash.com

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