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21 Regrets You Don’t Want to Have in Life

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21 Regrets You Don’t Want to Have in Life

No one wants to admit that they are going to die someday. In fact, we all sort of live our lives fooling ourselves that our days are numbered. Even though it sounds morbid, having that at the forefront of your mind will help you live a life of no regrets. Here are 21 regrets you do NOT want to have in your life:

1. Not taking action on your dreams.

Most of us had dreams when we were kids. But as we got older, reality hits and tends to drown out the vision of what we really wanted in the first place. Think about this: there are many, many people in the world who are making their dreams come true. So why not you? You should be one of them.

2. Letting excuses or people derail you from your dreams.

Don’t let yourself come up with “excuses.” Excuses are not reasons. There is a difference. Reasons are valid, excuses are not. And don’t listen to anyone else’s negativity either. Make up your own mind and go for it!

3. Waiting for the “perfect” time.

“The perfect time” is nothing but a myth! That’s not to say that there are times when you should not act immediately – like waiting to travel the world if you are drowning in debt. But generally speaking, now is all we have. So take a step toward your goal now. Tomorrow isn’t guaranteed for any of us.

4. Not appreciating your health.

Here’s something I bet you can relate to: you never think about your health until you get a bad case of the flu. Am I right? It’s usually at those points where we think, “Why didn’t I appreciate feeling good?” Well, remind yourself to appreciate it every day, not just when you feel under the weather.

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5. Not helping others enough.

It’s easy to be selfish. Heck, our world practically encourages it! (unfortunately). But think how your actions affect other people. Take a look at the people around you and go out of your way to help them. I’m sure you would appreciate it if they did that for you, so live by the Golden Rule and go out of your way to help others.

6. Shying away from taking risks.

This is a tough one for a lot of people, myself included. But there is a difference between taking a calculated risk and an uncalculated risk. Take calculated risks. Think about the benefits and costs and then make an informed decision. Remember great risk can lead to great reward.

7. Not making your loved ones smile and laugh enough.

This one is self-explanatory. Our loved ones are the most important thing in the world… or at least they should be. So have fun with them. Smile and laugh… a lot!

8. Giving up before you reach success.

In our culture we all expect to become an overnight sensation like Justin Beiber. But guess what? In the real world it doesn’t work like that. Be patient in waiting for success. It will come.

9. Not spending enough time with positive people.

Dump the “Energy Vampires” in your life! You know who I’m talking about. The people who drain you, suck you dry, and give nothing back. Instead, surround yourself with positive people.

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10. Hurrying through life so that you don’t appreciate the little things.

Busy, busy, busy. This is the theme of the world today. Not that staying busy isn’t fun. But don’t stay so busy that you lose focus on the important things in life. As the saying goes, “stop to smell the roses.”

11. Not seeing the world and all its glory when you’re young and healthy.

If you have the money to travel (and you like doing it), get out there and see the world now! There are so many other fascinating cultures to explore, so just go do it!

12. Worrying too much and appreciating too little.

“Worrying is like praying for what you don’t want to happen,” (Robert Downey Jr.) It puts negative energy out to the universe. Instead, focus on what you do have, not what you don’t have.

13. Not planning for your future.

Some people wander aimlessly in life and go where the wind blows them. Hey, this might be fun for some people, but it doesn’t get you toward a goal of your choosing. So figure out what you want and then set your ship on a course toward achieving it.

14. Not learning from your mistakes.

No one wants to admit that they make mistakes. But honestly, I don’t believe in mistakes. To me, they’re all learning opportunities. So make sure that you actually learn from them. If you don’t, you will end up repeating them over and over and not improving your life.

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15. Working too much.

Going along with #14, if you are spending too much time at the office and not enough time with your loved ones, you may regret it someday. Even if you love your work and become engrossed in it, don’t forget to come up for air and spend quality time with people.

16. Not taking responsibility for your own life.

Your life today is a result of all the choices you made in the past. So don’t blame others, and put yourself in the driver’s seat for your future. Own your life and your choices.

17. Listening to other people’s opinions before your own.

It’s easy to listen to other peoples’ loud opinions. Sometimes that’s easier than listening to our own inner voice and intuition. But if you ignore your gut feeling, I almost guarantee you’ll eventually end up regretting it.

18. Not enjoying your children’s childhood.

Any parent will tell you that it’s not easy to raise kids. Children can be annoying and difficult. But time flies, and before you know it they will be adults and out of the house. So don’t miss them while they’re there.

19. Not learning who you can trust.

This is a difficult one for a lot of people – myself included. I was way too trusting in my younger years and learned the hard way who I could trust and who I couldn’t. The sooner you learn that lesson, the happier the rest of your life will be.

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20. Not saying what you should have said.

Did you not tell someone that you loved him/her? Did you not tell someone how much you appreciated them? Well, what are you waiting for? There’s no time like the present. Do it now.

21. Not doing what you should have done.

Ditto from #20. Don’t wait. Just do it. Get off your tushie and just do it. You won’t regret it!

I hope these 21 reminders put life into perspective a little more for you. You don’t want to be on your death-bed someday having any regrets. So make this your motto: No Excuses, No Regrets!

More by this author

Carol Morgan

Dr. Carol Morgan is the owner of HerSideHisSide.com, a communication professor, dating & relationship coach, TV personality, speaker, and author.

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Last Updated on January 5, 2022

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

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How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

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That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

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More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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