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20 Reasons Why Having Young Parents Can Add Meaning To Your Life

20 Reasons Why Having Young Parents Can Add Meaning To Your Life

For most people, becoming a parent is a life-changing experience. No matter who you are and how old you are, it’s a significant time when you learn the power of unconditional love, selflessness, laughter and how to make time for those who matter.

I know this because I’m 26 and I have three young children. I wouldn’t be who I am today without the experiences I’ve had as a parent. In fact, my husband and I believe that becoming parents at an early stage of our lives has always benefited us, and our kids, in so many ways.

Here are the 20 reasons why having young parents can add meaning to your life.

1. They take you on their own learning journey

I was 18 years old when I had my first child. Although my husband and I were already talking about babies, we were not emotionally and mentally ready to have children yet. We were still in the process of learning who we were and what was important to us. But becoming parents has helped us to grow as people. It has given us more confidence, taught us to care less what other people think, to appreciate the important things in life.

Young parents may not always have the financial stability that older parents have, or the life experience, but we are always learning. We are always giving it our everything. We are always showing our children that no matter what age or stage you are at in life, you always have the potential to learn something new.

2. They make mistakes

Over the past 8 years, my husband and I have become much more patient and understanding parents. We weren’t always like that. At the beginning, we struggled to put on the first diaper, our children’s diets weren’t as healthy as they could be, and we were so focused on routines that we didn’t just enjoy being a parent.

Having children young means that we may not always know what the right thing to do is. But that’s okay.

I’ve always admitted my mistakes, and I’ve always taught my kids that it’s okay to get things wrong. My kids are learning that it’s okay not to be perfect.

3. They always strive to become better

I used to be someone who was too shy to ask questions. Someone who never put their hand up in class. I had a really low self-esteem and lacked confidence. Becoming a parent changed all that for me. I learnt that it takes a lot of courage to speak up. That there’s no shame in asking for help.

Young parents know that others think they’re not ‘up to the job’. They know that people doubt their capabilities. But they absolutely love their children and they are determined to do what’s best for them.

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4. They show you that life is filled with ups and downs

Our family has gone through many different challenges. We’ve moved house several times, we’ve overcome family difficulties, we’ve encountered other personal problems. But we have survived.

Young parents know that difficult times can come and go, but sticking by each other is what’s important.

5. They have an optimistic view of life

As a 26 year old, I am very hopeful about my future. I believe that I still have my whole life ahead of me. I have many more dreams, goals and achievements to strive for. I have places to see, people to meet, lessons to learn.

When raising my three young girls, this approach helps to encourage them to believe that anything is possible. That life is full of so many opportunities. That your life can be whatever you want it to be.

6. They remind you to laugh

My husband and I often do a lot of laughing around our kids. We believe that life can be so stressful and that this is why it’s important to see the lighter side of it. Laughter really is the best medicine.

Having young parents means that you can often bounce back easier. That you can find the humour in every situation.

7. They like being silly and playful with you

Our girls love to hang off their Daddy’s legs like monkeys. They also like to tickle him and chase him around the house. I love sipping on tea with my girls and pretending we’re all having a picnic. Young parents often love to chase their kids around, to crawl around with them in an indoor play ground, to sing along with them in the car. We know that we can be silly at times, but it’s always worth it when our reward is our child’s laughter.

8. They share their hobbies and interests with you

My husband and I first met in a car club. He still loves to tinker with cars and my interest still exists as well. Our girls have a passion for cars too. Sharing our hobbies and interests with our kids shows them that as well as being parents, we’re individuals with our own likes and dislikes.

Young parents want their kids to know that they didn’t ‘mess up’ their life. In fact, they’ve completed their life.

9. They can relate to how you’re feeling

I still have very vivid memories of my childhood. Memories of the activities I did, who I spent time with, and the times when I got upset.

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Although young parents are often seen to have less emotional maturity, they can still imagine how their child would be feeling. They can think back to their own childhood and use that as a starting point. For many young parents, it really doesn’t feel too long ago a time.

10. They show you that it’s okay to cry

My children have seen me cry, and I know there’s no shame in that. I want my kids to know that we all feel down sometimes and it’s much better to let it out. That strength comes from acknowledging how you feel, as opposed to bottling it up inside.

Young parents might be going through a lot of hardship, and struggling to keep their emotions intact. But by crying it out, they’re showing their kids that they’re only human.

11. They don’t let others’ negative opinions rule their life

As a young mother, I’ve been confronted with a lot of criticism and judgement. I’ve had strangers make snide comments. I’ve had my parenting ability questioned because I’m “too young to understand what’s best for your child.”

But I’ve had to have confidence in my abilities. I’ve had to remember everything I’ve done for my kids. All the trouble my first child had breastfeeding and the fact that I persevered. The hundreds of specialist appointments I’ve attended for my girls. All the time I’ve spent rushing back and forth for my kids, determined to do what’s right by them.

Young parents may be given so much unsolicited advice, but they remain strong and do what’s best for their family. They teach their kids that you have to do what’s right for you, not somebody else. That your own happiness is what’s most important.

12. They want you to be less judgemental of others

Being met with all this negativity hasn’t turned me into a bitter person. It’s helped me to raise my children to be kind, to respect others, and not to judge.

Young parents are often judged, so the last thing they want is to do that to someone else.

13. They learn forgiveness through you

I’ve never had the best relationship with my mom. We’ve always clashed due to our personality differences.

But after becoming a mother at 18, I realized all the sacrifices that my mom made to raise my siblings and me. It gave me the strength to forgive her for all the painful things that happened in the past.

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Young parents may have had a difficult relationship with their own parents, but they want their kids to know their grandparents. They want their kids to understand their own identity and to have a greater sense of family.

14. They want you to never give up on your dreams

When I became a mother for the first time, I put my college studies on hold. I chose to stay at home and be there for my daughter. But I never gave up on my dreams. I never gave up my ambitious nature. I never gave on my passion for helping others through psychology and personal development. I now study and work from home.

Young parents do put many of their dreams on hold. They’ve made sacrifices along the way. But they’ve also proven that if they dream hard enough, their dreams can still come true. They want you to know that you shouldn’t give up either.

15. They teach you the importance of self-love

For the first 5 years of parenting, I hardly ever did anything for myself. I was so determined to give the kids my full attention, I dismissed my own needs. But now, I’ll buy things for myself. I take a bit more pride in my appearance. I don’t always say ‘yes’ to please everyone.

Young parents may be stereotyped to be more ‘selfish’, but we just don’t want to completely forget what matters to us. We know that a child deserves a mother who is happy with who they are.

16. They share practical advice with you

When my husband and I had our first child, we’d only moved out recently. We weren’t cooking healthy dinners, we were struggling to keep on top of the housework, and had financial difficulties. But as our circumstances improved, so did our skills.

Young parents are still learning to juggle the responsibilities of being an adult, as well as a parent. But as they’re learning, they’re able to share it with their kids along the way too.

17. They believe in second chances

I have been a stay at home mother. I have worked from home. I have studied from home. My life never stopped because I had children. It simply changed.

Young parents know that sometimes life doesn’t turn out the way that you expected it to, but not to feel discouraged. They want their children to know that you can always get right back up again.

18. They teach you the meaning of unconditional love

All parents make sacrifices. They put their careers on hold. They stop going out as often and don’t remember the last time they had a good night’s sleep.

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Young parents may have to sacrifice just a bit more, but they’re not wishing things were different. Those sacrifices have just deepened their love for you.

19. They teach you to cherish the moment

My husband and I want our kids to value working hard, but we also want them to enjoy life too. We want them to spend hours at a playground just because it’s fun. We want them to dress up in costumes and pretend to be whatever it is that they want to be. We want them to experience life, try new things, step outside their comfort zone.

Being a young mother, I want to make these ‘extra years’ count.

20. They’re proud that their lives are more meaningful now

Throughout the past 8 years, my husband and I have been met with a lot of confusion and surprise. “Why would you want children so early?” people would ask. But for both of us, we wouldn’t have it any other way. Here’s a quote that sums up perfectly how I feel:

“Being a young mom means that we met a little early, but it also means I get to love you a little longer. Some people said that my life ended when I had a baby but my life had just begun. You didn’t take away from my future, you gave me a new one.” – titaa

I am sure that many other young parents can relate to the love that I feel for my kids.

And how much more meaningful they have made my life.

Featured photo credit: Takmeomeo via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on March 14, 2019

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

7 Questions to Ask in a Job Interview That Will Impress the Interviewer

Recruiters might hold thousands of interviews in their careers and a lot of them are reporting the same thing—that most candidates play it safe with the questions they ask, or have no questions to ask in a job interview at all.

For job applicants, this approach is crazy! This is a job that you’re going to dedicate a lot of hours to and that might have a huge impact on your future career. Don’t throw away the chance to figure out if the position is perfect for you.

Here are 7 killer questions to ask in a job interview that will both impress your counterpart and give you some really useful insights into whether this job will be a dream … or a nightmare.

1. What are some challenges I might come up against this role?

A lesser candidate might ask, “what does a typical day look like in this role?” While this is a perfectly reasonable question to ask in an interview, focusing on potential challenges takes you much further because it indicates that you already are visualizing yourself in the role.

It’s impressive because it shows that you are not afraid of challenges, and you are prepared to strategize a game plan upfront to make sure you succeed if you get the job.

It can also open up a conversation about how you’ve solved problems in the past which can be a reassuring exercise for both you and the hiring manager.

How it helps you:

If you ask the interviewer to describe a typical day, you may get a vibrant picture of all the lovely things you’ll get to do in this job and all the lovely people you’ll get to do them with.

Asking about potential roadblocks means you hear the other side of the story—dysfunctional teams, internal politics, difficult clients, bootstrap budgets and so on. This can help you decide if you’re up for the challenge or whether, for the sake of your sanity, you should respectfully decline the job offer.

2. What are the qualities of really successful people in this role?

Employers don’t want to hire someone who goes through the motions; they want to hire someone who will excel.

Asking this question shows that you care about success, too. How could they not hire you with a dragon-slayer attitude like that?

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How it helps you:

Interviewers hire people who are great people to work with, but the definition of “great people” differs from person to person.

Does this company hire and promote people with a specific attitude, approach, worth ethic or communication style? Are the most successful people in this role strong extroverts who love to talk and socialize when you are studious and reserved? Does the company reward those who work insane hours when you’re happiest in a more relaxed environment?

If so, then this may not be the right match for you.

Whatever the answer is, you can decide whether you have what it takes for the manager to be happy with your performance in this role. And if the interviewer has no idea what success looks like for this position, this is a sign to proceed with extreme caution.

3. From the research I did on your company, I noticed the culture really supports XYZ. Can you tell me more about that element of the culture and how it impacts this job role?

Of course, you could just ask “what is the culture like here? ” but then you would miss a great opportunity to show that you’ve done your research!

Interviewers give BIG bonus point to those who read up and pay attention, and you’ve just pointed out that (a) you’re diligent in your research (b) you care about the company culture and (c) you’re committed to finding a great cultural fit.

How it helps you:

This question is so useful because it lets you pick an element of the culture that you really care about and that will have the most impact on whether you are happy with the organization.

For example, if training and development is important to you, then you need to know what’s on offer so you don’t end up in a dead-end job with no learning opportunities.

Companies often talk a good talk, and their press releases may be full of shiny CSR initiatives and all the headline-grabbing diversity programs they’re putting in place. This is your opportunity to look under the hood and see if the company lives its values on the ground.

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A company that says it is committed to doing the right thing by customers should not judge success by the number of up-sells an employee makes, for instance. Look for consistency, so you aren’t in for a culture shock after you start.

4. What is the promotion path for this role, and how would my performance on that path be measured?

To be clear, you are not asking when you will get promoted. Don’t go there—it’s presumptuous, and it indicates that you think you are better than the role you have applied for.

A career-minded candidate, on the other hand, usually has a plan that she’s working towards. This question shows you have a great drive toward growth and advancement and an intention to stick with the company beyond your current state.

How it helps you:

One word: hierarchy.

All organizations have levels of work and authority—executives, upper managers, line managers, the workforce, and so on. Understanding the hierarchical structure gives you power, because you can decide if you can work within it and are capable of climbing through its ranks, or whether it will be endlessly frustrating to you.

In a traditional pyramid hierarchy, for example, the people at the bottom tend to have very little autonomy to make decisions. This gets better as you rise up through the pyramid, but even middle managers have little power to create policy; they are more concerned with enforcing the rules the top leaders make.

If having a high degree of autonomy and accountability is important to you, you may do better in a flat hierarchy where work teams can design their own way of achieving the corporate goals.

5. What’s the most important thing the successful candidate could accomplish in their first 3 months/6 months/year?

Of all the questions to ask in a job interview, this one is impressive because it shows that you identify with and want to be a successful performer, and not just an average one.

Here, you’re drilling down into what the company needs, and needs quite urgently, proving that you’re all about adding value to the organization and not just about what’s in it for you.

How it helps you:

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Most job descriptions come with 8, 10 or 12 different job responsibilities and a lot of them with be boilerplate or responsibilities that someone in HR thinks are associated with this role. This question gives you a better sense of which responsibilities are the most important—and they may not be what initially attracted you to the role.

If you like the idea of training juniors, for example, but success is judged purely on your sales figures, then is this really the job you thought you were applying for?

This question will also give you an idea of what kind of learning curve you’re expected to have and whether you’ll get any ramp-up time before getting down to business. If you’re the type of person who likes to jump right in and get things done, for instance, you may not be thrilled to hear that you’re going to spend the first three months shadowing a peer.

6. What do you like about working here?

This simple question is all about building rapport with the interviewer. People like to talk about themselves, and the interviewer will be flattered that you’re interested in her opinions.

Hopefully, you’ll find some great connection points that the two of you share. What similar things drive you head into the office each day? How will you fit into the culture?

How it helps you:

You can learn a lot from this question. Someone who genuinely enjoys his job will be able to list several things they like, and their answers will sound passionate and sincere. If not….well, you might consider that a red flag.

Since you potentially can learn a lot about the company culture from this question, it’s a good idea to figure out upfront what’s important to you. Maybe you’re looking for a hands-off boss who values independent thought and creativity? Maybe you work better in environments that move at a rapid, exciting pace?

Whatever’s important to you, listen carefully and see if you can find any common ground.

7. Based on this interview, do you have any questions or concerns about my qualifications for the role?

What a great closing question to ask in a job interview! It shows that you’re not afraid of feedback—in fact, you are inviting it. Not being able to take criticism is a red flag for employers, who need to know that you’ll act on any “coaching moments” with a good heart.

As a bonus, asking this question shows that you are really interested in the position and wish to clear up anything that may be holding the company back from hiring you.

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How it helps you:

What a devious beast this question is! On the surface, it looks straightforward, but it’s actually giving you four key pieces of information.

First, is the manager capable of giving you feedback when put on the spot like this? Some managers are scared of giving feedback, or don’t think it’s important enough to bother outside of a formal performance appraisal. Do you want to work for a boss like that? How will you improve if no one is telling you what you did wrong?

Second, can the manager give feedback in a constructive way without being too pillowy or too confrontational? It’s unfair to expect the interviewer to have figured out your preferred way of receiving feedback in the space of an interview, but if she come back with a machine-gun fire of shortcomings or one of those corporate feedback “sandwiches” (the doozy slipped between two slices of compliment), then you need to ask yourself, can you work with someone who gives feedback like that?

Third, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about before you leave the interview. This gives you the chance to make a final, tailored sales pitch so you can convince the interviewer that she should not be worried about those things.

Fourth, you get to learn the things the hiring manager is concerned about period. If turnover is keeping him up at night, then your frequent job hopping might get a lot of additional scrutiny. If he’s facing some issues with conflict or communication, then he might raise concerns regarding your performance in this area.

Listen carefully: the concerns that are being raised about you might actually be a proxy for problems in the wider organization.

Making Your Interview Work for You

Interviews are a two-way street. While it is important to differentiate yourself from every other candidate, understand that convincing the interviewer you’re the right person for the role goes hand-in-hand with figuring out if the job is the right fit for you.

Would you feel happy in a work environment where the people, priorities, culture and management style were completely at odds with the way you work? Didn’t think so!

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Featured photo credit: Amy Hirschi via unsplash.com

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