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16 Sad Songs to Listen to When You Need a Good Cry

16 Sad Songs to Listen to When You Need a Good Cry

A sad song has a way of digging down into your soul. The tears that emerge release the baggage you’ve been holding on to. Without a little help from music, we may not dig down deep enough. Most sad songs help us understand our own problems in a greater context and can be the perfect companion on a rainy Friday night when you’re left to yourself. Here are the best ones to get you started:

Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper

This is one of Cyndi Lauper’s biggest hits. When you hear it, you think of all those missed moments you could have said what you wanted, but didn’t. You wonder: What if?

Your Song by Elton John

This sad song is so simple that it touches on anyone you ever loved that didn’t love you back or you haven’t met yet.

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper

If you’re hiding something or want to be accepted for who you are, grab the napkins.

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True by Spandau Ballet

No one ever really got what this sad song meant. The verses are quite cryptic but can mean anything. It has a nostalgic feel of better times of innocence and coming of age.

I Can’t Tell You Why by The Eagles

If you had a relationship that you tried over and over again to fix, and you both gave it a good go, but still nothing, these lyrics will speak to you. We really do “make it harder than it has to be.” It’s all about loyalty, and sometimes, loyalty does not always mean happiness.

Dance With My Father by Luther Vandross

Rarely do we hear songs about parents. Pull up to this and think about the ones who made you. They feel pain too.

Against All Odds by Phil Collins

A moving sad song about what could have been, and what it feels like to experience loss…and waiting.

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Old Lang Syne

This classic New Year’s Eve tune never fails. Another nostalgia piece, it takes you back to every loved one who passed away. It’s like seeing their faces on a slide.

Fast Car by Tracy Chapman

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There are times where we want to give up and disappear. No frills, no expensive ticket to travel the world, we just want to go–anywhere. Ms. Chapman tapped into a deep sense of freedom we all wish to experience: to be who we are with who we want.

All of Me by John Legend

This is a good play when you’ve messed up. Think about the unconditional love you share, or used to share.

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They’ll Be Sad Songs by Billy Ocean

This is a sad song about sad songs. A must-listen in between boxes of tissues.

Someone Like You by Adele

Yup, most of us are with second best. The guy or girl who wasn’t our top pick. This song is for those times you think about #1.

When I Was Your Man by Bruno Mars

If you missed an opportunity to get it right, Bruno reminds you that you’re not alone!

Stay by Rihanna

Ever felt completely vulnerable and exposed in a relationship? This song hits on all the points of why some people choose to never leave.

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Youth by Daughter

The words alone without the music will bring tears to your eyes. Definitely reserved for the “ugly cry” moments. A haunting, beautiful song.

Wakeup Alone by Amy Winehouse

The lyrics to this are dark and passionate. The title itself says it all when it comes to the pain of loneliness.

A sad song is nothing without a few crunchy or salty snacks, and plenty of napkins on hand. If you’re going to go there, go all the way in and let it out. Now you know you’re not the only one in the world with problems even when it feels like it.

Featured photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ashleyrosex/3183219381 via flickr.com

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The Gentle Art of Saying No

The Gentle Art of Saying No

No!

It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

  1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
  2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
  3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
  4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
  5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
  6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
  7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
  8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
  9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
  10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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