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16 Sad Songs to Listen to When You Need a Good Cry

16 Sad Songs to Listen to When You Need a Good Cry

A sad song has a way of digging down into your soul. The tears that emerge release the baggage you’ve been holding on to. Without a little help from music, we may not dig down deep enough. Most sad songs help us understand our own problems in a greater context and can be the perfect companion on a rainy Friday night when you’re left to yourself. Here are the best ones to get you started:

Time After Time by Cyndi Lauper

This is one of Cyndi Lauper’s biggest hits. When you hear it, you think of all those missed moments you could have said what you wanted, but didn’t. You wonder: What if?

Your Song by Elton John

This sad song is so simple that it touches on anyone you ever loved that didn’t love you back or you haven’t met yet.

True Colors by Cyndi Lauper

If you’re hiding something or want to be accepted for who you are, grab the napkins.

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True by Spandau Ballet

No one ever really got what this sad song meant. The verses are quite cryptic but can mean anything. It has a nostalgic feel of better times of innocence and coming of age.

I Can’t Tell You Why by The Eagles

If you had a relationship that you tried over and over again to fix, and you both gave it a good go, but still nothing, these lyrics will speak to you. We really do “make it harder than it has to be.” It’s all about loyalty, and sometimes, loyalty does not always mean happiness.

Dance With My Father by Luther Vandross

Rarely do we hear songs about parents. Pull up to this and think about the ones who made you. They feel pain too.

Against All Odds by Phil Collins

A moving sad song about what could have been, and what it feels like to experience loss…and waiting.

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Old Lang Syne

This classic New Year’s Eve tune never fails. Another nostalgia piece, it takes you back to every loved one who passed away. It’s like seeing their faces on a slide.

Fast Car by Tracy Chapman

http://youtu.be/TO9Qa7MpAvw

There are times where we want to give up and disappear. No frills, no expensive ticket to travel the world, we just want to go–anywhere. Ms. Chapman tapped into a deep sense of freedom we all wish to experience: to be who we are with who we want.

All of Me by John Legend

This is a good play when you’ve messed up. Think about the unconditional love you share, or used to share.

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They’ll Be Sad Songs by Billy Ocean

This is a sad song about sad songs. A must-listen in between boxes of tissues.

Someone Like You by Adele

Yup, most of us are with second best. The guy or girl who wasn’t our top pick. This song is for those times you think about #1.

When I Was Your Man by Bruno Mars

If you missed an opportunity to get it right, Bruno reminds you that you’re not alone!

Stay by Rihanna

Ever felt completely vulnerable and exposed in a relationship? This song hits on all the points of why some people choose to never leave.

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Youth by Daughter

The words alone without the music will bring tears to your eyes. Definitely reserved for the “ugly cry” moments. A haunting, beautiful song.

Wakeup Alone by Amy Winehouse

The lyrics to this are dark and passionate. The title itself says it all when it comes to the pain of loneliness.

A sad song is nothing without a few crunchy or salty snacks, and plenty of napkins on hand. If you’re going to go there, go all the way in and let it out. Now you know you’re not the only one in the world with problems even when it feels like it.

Featured photo credit: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ashleyrosex/3183219381 via flickr.com

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Last Updated on August 6, 2020

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

Are we speaking the same language?

My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

Am I being lazy?

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

Early in the relationship:

“Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

When the relationship is established:

“Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

Have I actually got anything to say?

When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

Am I painting an accurate picture?

One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

What words am I using?

It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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Is the map really the territory?

Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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