Advertising

12 Important Things You Should Say To Your Partner Everyday

Advertising
12 Important Things You Should Say To Your Partner Everyday

Building a strong relationship is one of the most challenging and rewarding parts of a happy life. While there is no instruction manual for assembling your ideal partnership there are a few simple things you can say to your partner everyday to get you on the right track. Make a habit out of saying the following 12 things to your significant other (without sounding like a robot) and pretty soon you will be that adorable couple that make all your friends sick.

1. “I love you.”

love

    “I love you” is the easiest and most obvious thing to tell your partner. It even requires the least creativity on your part. Just make sure you mean it. Saying those three little words too often and without thinking will rob them of their meaning. Try to bust out an “I love you” whenever your partner makes you laugh or whenever they do something that reminds you why you are together. If you say the words while you are really feeling them your better half will hear the difference.

    2. “I was thinking about you.”

    pair-303053_640

      It’s important to let your partner know that they are on your mind even when you aren’t necessarily in the same room. If you see something cute or funny over the course of your day that reminds you of your partner, let them know. Inside jokes are a great way to connect the mundane “real world” to the world you share with each other. Send your significant other a text as it happens or save the story for downtime on the couch. Just don’t underestimate the effect that a “I saw something that reminded me of you…” can have on a relationship.

      Advertising

      3. “How was your day?”

      day

        It’s easy to fall into the trap of repeating this phrase verbatim every day, but if you put some thought into it you will feel more connected to your partner. Ask about specific things your better half deals with in their day-to-day. Ask about that annoying co-worker or about the big assignment they’ve been working on. Giving your partner a way to share other parts of their life with you will help connect the dots between the times when you are together. It may also help you understand why they are always in a bad mood on Thursdays so you can be ready with their favorite dinner.

        4. “I support you.”

        hands-344759_640

          Encourage your partner by letting them know you support their decisions. Even go one step further and try to help them accomplish goals they have set for themselves. Life is full of obstacles and feeling like you have another person in your corner can go a long way to helping you overcome them. Don’t just be a couple, be a team. Reminding your better half that you have their back will strengthen the ties between you.

          5. “You get my motor going.”

          Advertising

          woman-254720_640

            If you’ve been in a relationship for a long time it is easy to fall into a less than thrilling routine. That makes it all the more important to remind you partner that they still excite you. Letting them know that “You look smokin’ hot in that dress.” or saying “You should not where a shirt more often.” will make them feel better about themselves and remind you why you started dating in the first place.

            6. “Sorry.”

            sorry

              Everybody screws up and everyone is wrong sometimes. Occasionally we even dig our heels in about something only to later discover we had no idea what we were talking about. Stubbornness has no place in a happy relationship, so apologize when you make a mistake. Apologize for getting angry. Apologize for hurting your partner’s feelings. Even apologize for things that aren’t your fault. Letting your significant other know that you are sorry that they had a crappy day is another way to remind them you are on the same team.

              7. “You’re the best.”

              together-332260_640

                Your partner should be one of (if not your best) friend. If you don’t like hanging out, you definitely shouldn’t be in a relationship. It may not come as naturally as some of the other items on this list, but let your partner know that you think they are great. This is another one that works great paired with a laugh. A chuckling “You’re the best.” can be sincere and heartfelt. Don’t be afraid to throw in a “You’re my favourite.” during a quiet moment, either.

                Advertising

                8. “I love your mind.”

                reading-216862_640

                  Something that is easy to overlook when dolling out compliments is your partner’s mind. We live in a superficial world with models and bodybuilders at every turn, but that is no excuse to let your relationship be superficial too. Tell your partner that you value their mind. Let them know that you think they are smart, funny, romantic, or talented. The goal of any healthy relationship is to have it last until well after beauty fades, so remind your partner that you’re in it for the long haul by valuing their mind equally with their body.

                  9. “I respect you.”

                  couple-254683_640

                    Just like with your non-romantic friends, respect is a critical piece of your relationship with your significant other. Let them know that you hold them in high regard by asking for their opinion on things that are giving you trouble. Let your partner know that you admire something they did that took a lot of courage. When a person feels respected they also feel happy and safe, which are two cornerstones to any good relationship.

                    10. “I disagree.”

                    Advertising

                    argument-238529_640

                      Part of respecting your partner is letting them know when you disagree with them. No one wants to marry a push over and no one wants to raise children with a yes-man. You may be a team, but the strength of any team is in the thoughts and actions of its individual members. Maintain your own opinions and voice them in a respectful manner. Offering a different perspective may help your partner find solutions to problems that they might not have otherwise considered.

                      11. “We should go…”

                      beach

                        As we learned in phrase #5, excitement is an important part of a fun relationship. You and your partner should share experiences and memories as well as thoughts and opinions, so plan adventures together. Daydream about hiking up Mount Kilimanjaro or snorkeling the Great Barrier Reef. Try new things together. The only thing that gets the heart racing more than love is skydiving!

                        12. “Goodnight.”

                        sleep-330869_640

                          We live in an age when communication has never been easier. With the push of a button we can send impulse thoughts across oceans, so there is no excuse for not saying goodnight. It not only serves the practical function of letting your partner know you are now trying to sleep, it also lets them know that you are thinking about them. Even if you haven’t spoken all day, and even (especially) if you’ve been arguing, end the day on a positive note.

                          Advertising

                          Featured photo credit: Andi_Graf via pixabay.com

                          More by this author

                          8 Benefits of Running 5 Minutes Every Day You Didn’t Know 10 Common Job Hunting Mistakes You Need to Avoid 8 Keys to Success from Jack Ma, Self-Made Billionaire and CEO of Alibaba This Is Why Recent Graduates Should Join a Start-Up 5 Fun Lessons to Help Make Your Kids Financially Independent

                          Trending in Communication

                          1 10 Signs You Are in a Codependent Relationship (And What To Do About It) 2 I Want To Be Happy: 7 Science-Backed Ways to Find Happiness 3 13 Ways Happy People Think and Feel Differently 4 10 Morning Habits Of Happy People 5 What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

                          Read Next

                          Advertising
                          Advertising

                          Last Updated on July 20, 2021

                          How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

                          Advertising
                          How to Overcome the Fear of Public Speaking (A Step-by-Step Guide)

                          You’re standing behind the curtain, just about to make your way on stage to face the many faces half-shrouded in darkness in front of you. As you move towards the spotlight, your body starts to feel heavier with each step. A familiar thump echoes throughout your body – your heartbeat has gone off the charts.

                          Don’t worry, you’re not the only one with glossophobia(also known as speech anxiety or the fear of speaking to large crowds). Sometimes, the anxiety happens long before you even stand on stage.

                          Your body’s defence mechanism responds by causing a part of your brain to release adrenaline into your blood – the same chemical that gets released as if you were being chased by a lion.

                          Here’s a step-by-step guide to help you overcome your fear of public speaking:

                          1. Prepare yourself mentally and physically

                          According to experts, we’re built to display anxiety and to recognize it in others. If your body and mind are anxious, your audience will notice. Hence, it’s important to prepare yourself before the big show so that you arrive on stage confident, collected and ready.

                          “Your outside world is a reflection of your inside world. What goes on in the inside, shows on the outside.” – Bob Proctor

                          Exercising lightly before a presentation helps get your blood circulating and sends oxygen to the brain. Mental exercises, on the other hand, can help calm the mind and nerves. Here are some useful ways to calm your racing heart when you start to feel the butterflies in your stomach:

                          Warming up

                          If you’re nervous, chances are your body will feel the same way. Your body gets tense, your muscles feel tight or you’re breaking in cold sweat. The audience will notice you are nervous.

                          If you observe that this is exactly what is happening to you minutes before a speech, do a couple of stretches to loosen and relax your body. It’s better to warm up before every speech as it helps to increase the functional potential of the body as a whole. Not only that, it increases muscle efficiency, improves reaction time and your movements.

                          Here are some exercises to loosen up your body before show time:

                          Advertising

                          1. Neck and shoulder rolls – This helps relieve upper body muscle tension and pressure as the rolls focus on rotating the head and shoulders, loosening the muscle. Stress and anxiety can make us rigid within this area which can make you feel agitated, especially when standing.
                          2. Arm stretches – We often use this part of our muscles during a speech or presentation through our hand gestures and movements. Stretching these muscles can reduce arm fatigue, loosen you up and improve your body language range.
                          3. Waist twists – Place your hands on your hips and rotate your waist in a circular motion. This exercise focuses on loosening the abdominal and lower back regions which is essential as it can cause discomfort and pain, further amplifying any anxieties you may experience.

                          Stay hydrated

                          Ever felt parched seconds before speaking? And then coming up on stage sounding raspy and scratchy in front of the audience? This happens because the adrenaline from stage fright causes your mouth to feel dried out.

                          To prevent all that, it’s essential we stay adequately hydrated before a speech. A sip of water will do the trick. However, do drink in moderation so that you won’t need to go to the bathroom constantly.

                          Try to avoid sugary beverages and caffeine, since it’s a diuretic – meaning you’ll feel thirstier. It will also amplify your anxiety which prevents you from speaking smoothly.

                          Meditate

                          Meditation is well-known as a powerful tool to calm the mind. ABC’s Dan Harris, co-anchor of Nightline and Good Morning America weekend and author of the book titled10% Happier , recommends that meditation can help individuals to feel significantly calmer, faster.

                          Meditation is like a workout for your mind. It gives you the strength and focus to filter out the negativity and distractions with words of encouragement, confidence and strength.

                          Mindfulness meditation, in particular, is a popular method to calm yourself before going up on the big stage. The practice involves sitting comfortably, focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future – which likely includes floundering on stage.

                          Here’s a nice example of guided meditation before public speaking:

                          2. Focus on your goal

                          One thing people with a fear of public speaking have in common is focusing too much on themselves and the possibility of failure.

                          Do I look funny? What if I can’t remember what to say? Do I look stupid? Will people listen to me? Does anyone care about what I’m talking about?’

                          Instead of thinking this way, shift your attention to your one true purpose – contributing something of value to your audience.

                          Advertising

                          Decide on the progress you’d like your audience to make after your presentation. Notice their movements and expressions to adapt your speech to ensure that they are having a good time to leave the room as better people.

                          If your own focus isn’t beneficial and what it should be when you’re speaking, then shift it to what does. This is also key to establishing trust during your presentation as the audience can clearly see that you have their interests at heart.[1]

                          3. Convert negativity to positivity

                          There are two sides constantly battling inside of us – one is filled with strength and courage while the other is doubt and insecurities. Which one will you feed?

                          ‘What if I mess up this speech? What if I’m not funny enough? What if I forget what to say?’

                          It’s no wonder why many of us are uncomfortable giving a presentation. All we do is bring ourselves down before we got a chance to prove ourselves. This is also known as a self-fulfilling prophecy – a belief that comes true because we are acting as if it already is. If you think you’re incompetent, then it will eventually become true.

                          Motivational coaches tout that positive mantras and affirmations tend to boost your confidents for the moments that matter most. Say to yourself: “I’ll ace this speech and I can do it!”

                          Take advantage of your adrenaline rush to encourage positive outcome rather than thinking of the negative ‘what ifs’.

                          Here’s a video of Psychologist Kelly McGonigal who encourages her audience to turn stress into something positive as well as provide methods on how to cope with it:

                          4. Understand your content

                          Knowing your content at your fingertips helps reduce your anxiety because there is one less thing to worry about. One way to get there is to practice numerous times before your actual speech.

                          Advertising

                          However, memorizing your script word-for-word is not encouraged. You can end up freezing should you forget something. You’ll also risk sounding unnatural and less approachable.

                          “No amount of reading or memorizing will make you successful in life. It is the understanding and the application of wise thought that counts.” – Bob Proctor

                          Many people unconsciously make the mistake of reading from their slides or memorizing their script word-for-word without understanding their content – a definite way to stress themselves out.

                          Understanding your speech flow and content makes it easier for you to convert ideas and concepts into your own words which you can then clearly explain to others in a conversational manner. Designing your slides to include text prompts is also an easy hack to ensure you get to quickly recall your flow when your mind goes blank.[2]

                          One way to understand is to memorize the over-arching concepts or ideas in your pitch. It helps you speak more naturally and let your personality shine through. It’s almost like taking your audience on a journey with a few key milestones.

                          5. Practice makes perfect

                          Like most people, many of us are not naturally attuned to public speaking. Rarely do individuals walk up to a large audience and present flawlessly without any research and preparation.

                          In fact, some of the top presenters make it look easy during showtime because they have spent countless hours behind-the-scenes in deep practice. Even great speakers like the late John F. Kennedy would spend months preparing his speech beforehand.

                          Public speaking, like any other skill, requires practice – whether it be practicing your speech countless of times in front of a mirror or making notes. As the saying goes, practice makes perfect!

                          6. Be authentic

                          There’s nothing wrong with feeling stressed before going up to speak in front of an audience.

                          Many people fear public speaking because they fear others will judge them for showing their true, vulnerable self. However, vulnerability can sometimes help you come across as more authentic and relatable as a speaker.

                          Advertising

                          Drop the pretence of trying to act or speak like someone else and you’ll find that it’s worth the risk. You become more genuine, flexible and spontaneous, which makes it easier to handle unpredictable situations – whether it’s getting tough questions from the crowd or experiencing an unexpected technical difficulty.

                          To find out your authentic style of speaking is easy. Just pick a topic or issue you are passionate about and discuss this like you normally would with a close family or friend. It is like having a conversation with someone in a personal one-to-one setting. A great way to do this on stage is to select a random audience member(with a hopefully calming face) and speak to a single person at a time during your speech. You’ll find that it’s easier trying to connect to one person at a time than a whole room.

                          With that said, being comfortable enough to be yourself in front of others may take a little time and some experience, depending how comfortable you are with being yourself in front of others. But once you embrace it, stage fright will not be as intimidating as you initially thought.

                          Presenters like Barack Obama are a prime example of a genuine and passionate speaker:

                          7. Post speech evaluation

                          Last but not the least, if you’ve done public speaking and have been scarred from a bad experience, try seeing it as a lesson learned to improve yourself as a speaker.

                          Don’t beat yourself up after a presentation

                          We are the hardest on ourselves and it’s good to be. But when you finish delivering your speech or presentation, give yourself some recognition and a pat on the back.

                          You managed to finish whatever you had to do and did not give up. You did not let your fears and insecurities get to you. Take a little more pride in your work and believe in yourself.

                          Improve your next speech

                          As mentioned before, practice does make perfect. If you want to improve your public speaking skills, try asking someone to film you during a speech or presentation. Afterwards, watch and observe what you can do to improve yourself next time.

                          Here are some questions you can ask yourself after every speech:

                          Advertising

                          • How did I do?
                          • Are there any areas for improvement?
                          • Did I sound or look stressed?
                          • Did I stumble on my words? Why?
                          • Was I saying “um” too often?
                          • How was the flow of the speech?

                          Write everything you observed down and keep practicing and improving. In time, you’ll be able to better manage your fears of public speaking and appear more confident when it counts.

                          If you want even more tips about public speaking or delivering a great presentation, check out these articles too:

                          Reference

                          Read Next