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10 Ways You Don’t Know You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Has To Be

10 Ways You Don’t Know You’re Making Your Life Harder Than It Has To Be

Do you feel that life is against you?  Are you constantly struggling and see everything as a challenge?

Have you ever considered that this might be coming from you and not from the world around you?

Depending on how you think and act life can be perceived as difficult.   A shift in your attitude and perception can make a huge difference in creating an easier life.

Are these 10 traits making your life difficult?

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You believe that everyone is out to get you.

Someone in your office does something nice for you and automatically you begin to wonder what they want.  On a greater scale you distrust anyone who works for a large organization like the government, insurance company, lawyers, doctors, or even teachers.  What a great amount of fear and stress this creates!  How can you be 100% sure they are out to get you?

You see a future full of pitfalls.

You finally have a dinner date with a person you really like.  Instead of thinking how great this is and how much you are going to enjoy the evening, you focus on the ways that this evening is going to be a disaster.  You are so focused on all the negative things that might happen you don’t see the benefits and opportunities before you.  You could be missing something great!

You are a victim of your expectations.

A co-worker you admire has been paired with you on a project.  You have great ideas for how the project should be handled.  You expected to asked for your ideas but aren’t.   Because you weren’t asked, you didn’t voice them, as a result you feel angry and hurt.  Or you expected to be the lead player but aren’t.  You feel slighted and resentful.  In both cases you are projecting yourself as a victim based on your expectations.  Allowing yourself to be open to the situation rather than on your expectations makes life so much easier.

You are the sun and the the world rotates around you.

When planning an outing do you insist that everyone follow your plan?  When you are having a bad day do you make sure all your friends and family know about it?  These behaviors could be seriously making life more difficult for you.  By making things less about you and more about others would make for smoother relationships and less tension.

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You are stuck in neutral.

You have great plans and ideas, but somehow they never get off the ground.

When others inquire about the progress you are making with the plans, your answer is that you are waiting for the right moment.  The problem is that the right time never comes.  You have to take that first step before things can begin moving.

You always play it safe.

You are the person who researches every little thing to make sure you are making the best choice.  You never do anything impulsive or take any chances.  Change and uncertainty are your enemies.  Unfortunately, life isn’t predicable or safe. Sometimes you have to take a risk to move forward.

You are a societal clone .

You know everything about your friends because they are just like you.  You are constantly watching them and they are constantly watching you.  If fact you pay so much attention to others in your group you know immediately when one steps out of the mold. Fear of being different binds you together.  Wouldn’t life be so much easier if you could followed your passions and desires rather copying others?

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You can’t let go.

She embarrassed you in front of your colleagues and you are never going to forgive her.  Sound familiar?  In another situation, you know you are right about how this should be done and nothing is going to change your mind. Has this attitude ever embarrassed you when you were proven wrong?  When you not longer need to fuel past transgressions or the need to be right life takes on a totally new focus.

You are a taker and not a giver.

Your friends are great about coming over to help you, but when they need your help you disappear.  If you do come out to help, you often do it grudgingly.  You tend to be more focused on your phone than on the job at hand or make excuses to leave early.  It won’t take long for others to figure this out and you may find that others aren’t willing to help you any more.  Giving and receiving go hand in hand.

You have weak boundaries.

You are generous to a fault.  Friends and family know that if they need anything they can borrow it from you.  The problems arises when they borrow things and then forget to return them. You may ask for them back, but get the brush off.  Because you don’t want to create waves in your relationship, nothing happens.  This results in you being inconvenienced and possibly feeling used, but until you set some boundaries this will continue to happen. Set your boundaries and learn to say no.

Life does not have to be difficult or a struggle. Much of it depends on you.

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Are you ready to take control?

Featured photo credit: Having a bad day?/Melisa D. via flickr.com

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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