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10 Ways To Stop Lying To Yourself

10 Ways To Stop Lying To Yourself

Getting caught up in your own lies can devalue your sense of self-worth, distort your view of reality and negatively affect your close relationships. Here are 10 ways to stop lying to yourself and become a better, more honest you!

1. Stop taking constructive criticism as a personal attack.

There is a difference between being an overly critical bully and an honest and helpful friend. If someone you consider a friend gives you a bit of honest, somewhat critical advice, you shouldn’t be so quick to dismiss it. The issues we are most unsure about tend to be the issues we get the most defensive and emotional about when confronted with ideas that challenge our opinions.

2. Stop trying to convince everyone that you’re right.

Some people can be swayed on some opinions some of the time. But if you believe something passionately that someone else passionately disagrees with, you are never going to change their mind. Maybe if you talk about it long enough and with enough research backing your statements, he or she will say they agree with you. But they’re probably thinking to themselves that it’s not true, and resenting you for not letting them have their own opinion.

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3. Realize that the fun is in the effort.

child having fun

    Face it: very few people get to claim they are “the best” at something and really mean it—olympic athletes, perhaps, and maybe some classically-trained musicians or chefs at three-star Michelin restaurants. However, most of the time, there’s always going to be someone better than you at any task you may try to accomplish. But that doesn’t mean it’s not worth doing. Even if you are not the world’s best pianist or even the biggest wine connoisseur in your hometown , it doesn’t mean there’s not still enjoyment to be had in that activity. And if things were only worth doing if you’re the best, how would you ever try doing something new?

    4. Take chances.

    Everyone gets scared sometimes, and that’s not a bad thing. Fear keeps us from doing stupid things or getting into situations that may harm or kill us, and it has been essential in our development as a species. But fear can do more harm than good when we’re artificially creating it to avoid unpleasant situations. Next time you start to worry about something, take a deep breath and decide whether or not it’s something worth getting worked up about.

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    5. Stop putting things off until tomorrow.

    Really? What’s going to change? And how? If you don’t set out concrete steps for yourself and really narrow down exactly what is going to change and how, tomorrow will be exactly the same as today. Don’t let yourself fall back upon old habits instead of striving for the change you wish to embody.

    6. Quit doubting yourself.

    Age is what you make of it. Are you really too old to make new friends or take up a new hobby? Chances are, you’re not, and you would be happier if you made the attempt. Don’t start telling yourself you are too old to try new things; if you live for another decade or more, that’s over a decade that you’ve been telling yourself you’re too old to do them.

    7. Consider others’ points of view.

    It is easy to develop a kind of selective understanding of reality that allows you only to believe what you already suspect to be true. Before you get upset at someone for doing something you wouldn’t have done, stop and try to consider their reasoning. You can even ask them for their side of the story. Chances are, they had a good reason that you simply overlooked.

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    8. Realize when you’ve taken on too much.

    Learning when to say no is an important skill and happiness tool. Some of us are driven to take on more than we can quite chew—whether that means at work, or perhaps even in helping organize an event for a school fundraiser on your own. Truly acknowledge whether or not you have the time or energy to take on a task before accepting it, and if you can’t, don’t be afraid to say no. Chances are, you’re not going to hurt anyone’s feelings by saying no every now and then.

    9. Don’t give up.

    climbing up

      Sometimes we can be a little quick to admit defeat. Before giving up, stop to consider your options. There may be another way.

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      10. Don’t ignore your feelings.

      If you have to tell yourself you don’t care, chances are, you do. Instead of turning a cold shoulder on a friend or loved one, admit that you are hurt. While you may not change their mind, you may find an unexpected compromise.

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      Courtney Gordner

      Courtney is a passionate writer who shares about lifestyle tips on Lifehack.

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      Last Updated on September 28, 2020

      How To Study Effectively: 7 Simple Tips

      How To Study Effectively: 7 Simple Tips

      The brain is a tangled web of information. We don’t remember single facts, but instead we interlink everything by association. Anytime we experience a new event, our brains tie the sights, smells, sounds and our own impressions together into a new relationship.

      Our brain remembers things by repetition, association, visual imagery, and all five senses. By knowing a bit about how the brain works, we can become better learners, absorbing new information faster than ever.

      Here are some study tips to help get you started:

      1. Use Flashcards

      Our brains create engrained memories through repetition. The more times we hear, see, or repeat something to ourselves, the more likely we are to remember it.

      Flashcards can help you learn new subjects quickly and efficiently. Flashcards allow you to study anywhere at any time. Their portable nature lends them to quick study sessions on the bus, in traffic, at lunch, or in the doctor’s office. You can always whip out your flashcards for a quick 2 to 3 minute study session.

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      To create effective flashcards, you need to put one point on each flashcard. Don’t load up the entire card with information. That’s just overload. Instead, you should dedicate one concept to each card.

      One of the best ways to make flashcards is to put 1 question on the front and one answer on the back. This way, you can repeatedly quiz yourself into you have mastered any topic of your choice.

      Commit to reading through your flash cards at least 3 times a day and you will be amazed at how quickly you pick up new information.

      As Tony Robbins says,

      “Repetition is the mother of skill”.

      2. Create the Right Environment

      Often times, where you study can be just as important as how you study. For an optimum learning environment, you’ll want to find a nice spot that is fairly peaceful. Some people can’t stand a deafening silence, but you certainly don’t want to study near constant distractions.

      Find a spot that you can call your own, with plenty of room to spread out your stuff. Go there each time you study and you will find yourself adapting to a productive study schedule. When you study in the same place each time, you become more productive in that spot because you associate it with studying.

      3. Use Acronyms to Remember Information

      In your quest for knowledge, you may have once heard of an odd term called “mnemonics”. However, even if you haven’t heard of this word, you have certainly heard of its many applications. One of the most popular mnemonic examples is “Every Good Boy Does Fine”. This is an acronym used to help musicians and students to remember the notes on a treble clef stave.

      An acronym is simply an abbreviation formed using the intial letters of a word. These types of memory aids can help you to learn large quantities of information in a short period of time.

      4. Listen to Music

      Research has long shown that certain types of music help you to recall information. Information learned while listening to a particular song can often be remembered simply by “playing” the songs mentally in your head.

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      5. Rewrite Your Notes

      This can be done by hand or on the computer. However, you should keep in mind that writing by hand can often stimulate more neural activity than when writing on the computer.

      Everyone should study their notes at home but often times, simply re-reading them is too passive. Re-reading your notes can cause you to become disengaged and distracted.

      To get the most out of your study time, make sure that it is active. Rewriting your notes turns a passive study time into an active and engaging learning tool. You can begin using this technique by buying two notebooks for each of your classes. Dedicate one of the notebooks for making notes during each class. Dedicate the other notebook to rewriting your notes outside of class.

      6. Engage Your Emotions

      Emotions play a very important part in your memory. Think about it. The last time you went to a party, which people did you remember? The lady who made you laugh, the man who hurt your feelings, and the kid who went screaming through the halls are the ones you will remember. They are the ones who had an emotional impact.

      Fortunately, you can use the power of emotion in your own study sessions. Enhance your memory by using your five senses. Don’t just memorize facts. Don’t just see and hear the words in your mind. Create a vivid visual picture of what you are trying to learn.

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      For example, if you are trying to learn the many parts of a human cell, begin physically rotating the cell in your minds eye. Imagine what each part might feel like. Begin to take the cell apart piece by piece and then reconstruct it. Paint the human cell with vivid colors. Enlarge the cell in your mind’s eye so that it is now six feet tall and putting on your own personal comedy show. This visual and emotional mind play will help deeply encode information into your memory.

      7. Make Associations

      One of the best ways to learn new things is to relate what you want to learn with something you already know. This is known as association, and it is the mental glue that drives your brain.

      Have you ever listened to a song and been flooded by memories that were connected to it? Have you ever seen an old friend that triggered memories from childhood? This is the power of association.

      To maximize our mental powers, we must constantly be looking for ways to relate new information with old ideas and concepts that we are already familiar with.

      You can do this with the use of mindmapping. A mind map is used to diagram words, pictures, thoughts, and ideas into a an interconnected web of information. This simple practice will help you to connect everything you learn into a global network of knowledge that can be pulled from at any moment.

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      Learn more about mindmapping here: How to Mind Map to Visualize Your Thoughts (With Mind Map Examples)

      Featured photo credit: Alissa De Leva via unsplash.com

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