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10 Ways to Let Go of Past Relationships

10 Ways to Let Go of Past Relationships

“I beg of you, don’t say goodbye; Can’t we give our love another try; Come on baby, let’s start anew; ‘Cause breaking up is hard to do” – Neil Sedaka

They say that breaking up is hard to do, but it gets easier when you know how. The trick is to let go of the past. This is easier said than done, but it is achievable. Follow the ten steps below to let go of past relationships, and move on to the next chapter of your life.

1. Practice

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    Everything takes practice, and controlling your thoughts and emotions is no different. Stop taking a back seat in your life while expecting things to be handed to you. Instead, roll up your sleeves and put in the effort. Over time, you’ll develop the ability to pull your thoughts consistently away from dwelling on what could’ve been, and maintain focus on what is.

    2. Forgive Thyself

    Nobody’s perfect. If you think you did no wrong in your last relationship, you’re insane. The relationship ended for a reason. Something didn’t click, and it wasn’t what you both were looking for. No matter how amicable the split is, there are natural feelings of loss, abandonment, and failure. Forgive yourself and move on.

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    3. Find Comfort in the Good Times

    No relationship is completely devoid of good times, so focus on the great times you had. Don’t linger on what you could’ve done to make them better, or think of how to get them back. Those times are gone, and even if you get back with that person, things will never be exactly as they were. You don’t get mulligans in real life. Allow those good times to provide you with a smile. They happened to you, and they were happy. Don’t let negative thoughts of your ex keep you from reminiscing about your own happiness.

    4. Learn from Your Mistakes

    If your mind does wander into blame game territory, don’t beat yourself up for beating yourself up. This eye-for-an-eye situation involves only you, so you lose. You can’t always make it right with the same person, but you can atone for your mistakes by avoiding them in the future. No time is wasted if you learn something from the experience.

    5 . Focus on You

    Don’t worry about what your ex thinks, how they feel, what they’re doing, or who they’re talking to. There’s no point having lengthy, imaginary conversations, because it’s not the other person in your head–it’s you. You’re repeating their words or imagining responses. Stop worrying about what they’re doing. It’s out of your control. Focus on what you’re doing, before you hit a tree.

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    6. Eyes to the Front

    It sounds obvious, but the best way to let go of the past is to look to the future. That past relationship isn’t so bad when you have experiences and goals to look forward to. It’s ok to reminisce here and there, but don’t let thoughts of the past envelope you and impede on your present.

    7. Don’t Try to Forget

    Trying to forget someone is a bad idea. Simply by focusing on trying to forget, you’re going to drive yourself to do things you shouldn’t. The time you spent with someone is a part of your life. Why would you want to voluntarily give up on a part of yourself? Don’t block out memories on purpose; you lose enough of them naturally to force the situation.

    8. Embrace Life’s Impermanence

    Everything in life is temporary, even life itself. Even if immortality were possible, life wouldn’t stay like it is forever. We’d have to expand, connect, disconnect, and move. Part of growing up is accepting that nothing in life is permanent. No matter how hard you work, some things just aren’t in your control. Do what you can with what you have, or you’ll soon find yourself with nothing.

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    9. Tear Down the Berlin Wall

    When Chuck Norris pees on a wall, it ends communism...

      When Chuck Norris pees on a wall, it ends communism…

      There’s a void where that past relationship once was. You need to fill that void with human contact. Whether you connect with new people or reconnect with friends and family, ease your defenses and let people in. If you’re guarded, you’ll just drag out the inevitable, making yourself miserable in the process.

      10. Give Good…

      A great way to feel better is to give to others. Katie McCarthy has a great podcast called Give Good, in which she profiles people who make positive contributions to society. It’s entertaining to learn of all the ways you can contribute. You don’t have to change the world–just make people around you happier. They’ll return the favor by cheering you up when you’re down.

      Breaking up is difficult, but we all lose important relationships. Letting go of past relationship is difficult, but necessary to move forward with your life. If you don’t, you’ll end up missing out on a lot of time and regretting it later, creating a viscous cycle. With focus, discipline, and practice, you can drop that past relationship from your mind and move on toward a newer, happier you.

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      Last Updated on October 18, 2018

      50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

      50+ Best Motivational Quotes To Prepare You For Any Challenges In Life

      Life is filled with highs and lows —happiness and struggles that will test your resilience and integrity, push you to overcome challenges and leave you with lessons that will make you even stronger on your way up.

      It’s the way you feel and think about yourself, including your expectations and beliefs about what is possible to you, greatly determines everything that happens to you.

      It all starts with your thoughts. When you change your thoughts, you transform the quality of your life. (Right, Nancy’s story is a typical example!)

      Below is a list of the best motivational quotes to inspire you to start your day with a blast:

      Quotes for self-assurance

      1. Don’t downgrade your dream just to fit your reality, upgrade your conviction to match your destiny.

        2. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem and smarter than you think.

          3. You are confined only by the walls you build yourself.

            4. The man who has confidence in himself gains the confidence of others

              5. You attract what you are, not what you want. If you want great, then be great.

                6. It’s not who you are that holds you behind, it’s who you think your are not.

                  Quotes about positivity

                  7. Stop being afraid of what could go wrong and think of what could go right.

                    8. You should never regret anything in life. If it’s good, it’s wonderful. If it’s bad, it is experience.

                      9. Falling down is an accident, staying down is a choice.

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                        10. If you have the power to make someone happy, do it. The world needs more of that.

                          11. Always believe that something wonderful is about to happen.

                            12. Don’t be afraid to give up the good and go for great.

                              13. Remember that life’s greatest lessons are usually learned from worst times and from the worst mistakes.

                                Quotes for work and success

                                14. Don’t talk, just act. Don’t say, just show. Don’t promise, just prove.

                                  15. Never stop doing great just because someone doesn’t give you credit.

                                    16. Discipline is doing what needs to be done, even if you don’t want to.

                                      17. Work while they sleep. Learn while they party. Save while they spend. Live like they dream.

                                        18. The key to success is to focus our conscious mind on things we desire, not things we fear.

                                          19. Never apologize for having high standards, people who really want to be in your life will rise to meet them.

                                            20. If it doesn’t challenge you, it won’t change you.

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                                              21. Never give up on a dream just because of the time it will take to accomplish it, time will pass anyway.

                                                22. Don’t fear failure. Fear being in the exact same place next year as you are today.

                                                  23. A hill is just another opportunity to leave your competition behind.

                                                    24. Don’t quit. You’re already in pain. You’re already hurt. Get a reward from it.

                                                      25. Hustle until you no longer need to introduce yourself.

                                                        26. You didn’t come this far only to come this far.

                                                          27. Be selective in your battles for sometimes peace is better than being right.

                                                            28 If we keep doing what we are doing, we’re going to keep getting what we’re getting.

                                                              29. You will never know your limits until you push yourself to them.

                                                                30. Do what you have to do until you can do what you want to do.

                                                                  31. The man on top of the mountain didn’t fall there.

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                                                                    32. If your dreams don’t scare you, they are not big enough.

                                                                      33. If you can’t handle stress, you won’t manage success.

                                                                        34. Don’t be pushed by your problems, be led by your dreams.

                                                                          35. Don’t mistake silence for weakness. Smart people don’t plan big moves out loud.

                                                                            36. Simplicity is the ultimate sophistication.

                                                                              37. Obsessed is the word the lazy use to describe dedicated.

                                                                                38. You become who you spend your time with.

                                                                                  39. Be stubborn about your goals and flexible about your methods.

                                                                                    40. Hard work beats talent when talent doesn’t work hard.

                                                                                      41. If you don’t build your dreams, someone else will hire you to build theirs.

                                                                                        42. Between stimulus and response is our greatest power –the freedom to choose.

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                                                                                          43. What comes easy won’t last, what lasts won’t come easy.

                                                                                            44. Don’t limit your challenges, challenge your limits.

                                                                                              45. Work until your idols become your rivals.

                                                                                                Quotes about money

                                                                                                46. Formal education will make you a living. Self-education will make you a fortune.

                                                                                                  47. I create new enemies every day, it’s called business.

                                                                                                    48. When you have a Million Dollar vision, don’t surround yourself with 1 cent minds.

                                                                                                      49. You can’t get rich thinking poor.

                                                                                                        50. Doing what is comfortable is rarely profitable.

                                                                                                          51. If you can count your money, work harder.

                                                                                                            If you find yourself feeling lost and frustrated, it’s never too late to change things up. Check out this guide:

                                                                                                            How to Start Over and Reboot Your Life When It Seems Too Late

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