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10 Things You Should Never Do to Your Children That You Think Are Acts of Love

10 Things You Should Never Do to Your Children That You Think Are Acts of Love

We want to give our children the best. We would love to give our children all the things we never got to have. But sometimes parents go too far with the way they show their affection. And this doesn’t bring the best out of our kids. Before things get out of hand, pay attention to the points listed below.

1. Making them feel like kings.

It is important to make your kids feel special, but losing your authority to them will only have negative consequences. Asserting your authority means establishing borders, boundaries and limitations as you raise them. Although it is vital to entrust them with certain responsibilities, it is your duty as the parent to guide them through it and make a success of whatever they are given.

2. Entrusting them with too much money.

Money is a tool; it is never an ornament. The earlier you make them understand this, the better off your kids will be. Although we live in a time of abundance and so many easy options and access, it is your job to manage resources, however abundant. Entrusting them with a million dollars or buying expensive jewelry for them in their early years will be too much for them to handle, and the end result will be a child who is not thankful for anything.

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3. Stopping them from working.

Work is essential in life. Every responsible adult has to work to earn a living. Making them understand this is beneficial to their success as adults. Understandably you may want to protect them from anything that is laborious but teaching them the vital lesson of work will be more protective than destructive. Set expectations for them as they try to go to college. Let them appreciate earning something of value and feeling proud of this.

4. Encouraging them not to give back.

One of the most essential lessons my parents taught me was why I should give back. That is the flow of life. You take and you give. Do not hold your children back from wanting to reach out and volunteer whether in deeds or in charity.

4. Not requiring them to be grateful.

You may feel your child deserves everything he/she receives and owes no one a thing. But this does not stir an appreciative spirit in them. Words like “thank you” have a way of making them understand the importance of everything they are given.

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5. Acting like a spoiled child before them.

We as parents are supposed to lead by example. Our children should see that responsibility in us, that we are firm and tact. We shouldn’t be whining and complaining about everything in front of them.

6. Failing to establish boundaries.

By nature kids want to be pampered and spoiled. It is not your duty as parents to make this happen. Rather, you are meant to make sure they become well-behaved and likable. To do this, limitations and restrictions are meant to be established; if not, the child becomes disrespectful and rude.

7. Letting them have their way all the time.

It is all about picking what you should be giving to them and what you shouldn’t. There is a difference with wanting a new gadget or having candy. It is left for you to choose those things they should have their way with and those things they shouldn’t.

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8. Offering them gifts for the wrong reasons.

If your child is bored with the old toy you bought for him/her and you have to offer a new one as a way to stop them from whining, you are offering them gifts for the wrong reasons. Gifts should be offered to show they are deserving of it and they have shown they are responsible enough to handle and manage them.

9. Discouraging relationships that will build them up.

It is not about being with other spoiled kids. Sometimes it serves you wonderful benefits to take them to gatherings of older people who will share insightful knowledge with them. Let them see the benefits in being thankful. Invite people who are participating in volunteer work to your homes. Stifling the child in unhealthy relationships spoils the child.

10. Withholding your child from being accountable.

Your child should be accountable for his/her actions. Yes your child will make mistakes, but not holding them accountable for these mistakes doesn’t make them see the importance of learning from mistakes.

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Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on September 12, 2019

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

12 Things You Should Remember When Feeling Lost in Life

Even the most charismatic people you know, whether in person or celebrities of some sort, experience days where they feel lost in life and isolated from everyone else.

While it’s good to know we aren’t alone in this feeling, the question still remains:

What should we do when we feel lost and lonely?

Here are 12 things to remember:

1. Recognize That It’s Okay!

The truth is, there are times you need to be alone. If you’ve always been accustomed to being in contact with people, this may prove difficult.

However, learning how to be alone and comfortable in your own skin will give you confidence and a sense of self reliance.

We cheat ourselves out of the opportunity to become self reliant when we look for constant companionship.

Learn how to embrace your me time: What Your Fear of Being Alone Is Really About and How to Get over It

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2. Use Your Lost and Loneliness as a Self-Directing Guide

You’ve most likely heard the expression: “You have to know where you’ve been to know where you’re going.”

Loneliness also serves as a life signal to indicate you’re in search of something. It’s when we’re in the midst of solitude that answers come from true soul searching.

Remember, there is more to life than what you’re feeling.

3. Realize Loneliness Helps You Face the Truth

Being in the constant company of others, although comforting sometimes, can often serve as a distraction when we need to face the reality of a situation.

Solitude cuts straight to the chase and forces you to deal with the problem at hand. See it as a blessing that can serve as a catalyst to set things right!

4. Be Aware That You Have More Control Than You Think

Typically, when we see ourselves as being lost or lonely, it gives us an excuse to view everything we come in contact with in a negative light. It lends itself to putting ourselves in the victim mode, when the truth of the matter is that you choose your attitude in every situation.

No one can force a feeling upon you! It is YOU who has the ultimate say as to how you choose to react.

5. Embrace the Freedom That the Feeling of Being Alone Can Offer

Instead of wallowing in self pity, which many are prone to do because of loneliness, try looking at your circumstance as a new-found freedom.

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Most people are in constant need of approval of their viewpoints. Try enjoying the fact that  you don’t need everyone you care about to support your decisions.

6. Acknowledge the Person You Are Now

Perhaps you feel a sense of loneliness and confusion because your life circumstances have taken you away from the persona that others know to be you.

Perhaps the new you differs radically from the old. Realize that life is about change and how we react to that change. It’s okay that you’re not who you used to be.

Take a look at this article and learn to accept your imperfect self: Accept Yourself (Flaws and All): 7 Benefits of Being Vulnerable

7. Keep Striving to Do Your Best

Often those who are feeling isolated and unto themselves will develop a defeatist attitude. They’ll do substandard work because their self esteem is low and they don’t care.

Never let this feeling take away your sense of worth! Do your best always and when you come through this dark time, others will admire how you stayed determined in spite of the obstacles you had to overcome.

And to live your best life, you must do this ONE thing: step out of your comfort zone.

8. Don’t Forget That Time Is Precious

When we’re lost in a sea of loneliness and depression, it’s all too easy to reflect on regrets of past life events. This does nothing but feed negativity and perpetuate the situation.

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Instead of falling prey to this common pitfall, put one foot in front of the other and acknowledge every positive step you take. By doing this, you can celebrate the struggles you overcome at the end of the day.

9. Remember, Things Happen for a Reason

Every circumstance we encounter in our life is designed to teach us and that lesson is in turn passed on to others.

Sometimes we’re fortunate enough to figure out the lesson to be learned, while other times, we simply need to have faith that if the lesson wasn’t meant directly for us to learn from, how we handled it was observed by someone who needed to learn.

Your solitude and feeling of lost, in this instance, although painful possibly, may be teaching someone else.

10. Journal During This Time

Record your thoughts when you’re at the height of loneliness and feeling lost. You’ll be amazed when you reflect back at how you viewed things at the time and how far you’ve come later.

This time (if recorded) can give you a keen insight into who you are and what makes you feel the way you feel.

11. Remember You Aren’t the First to Feel This Way

It’s quite common to feel as if we’re alone and no one else has ever felt this way before. We think this because at the time of our distress, we’re silently observing others around us who are seemingly fine in every way.

The truth is, we can’t possibly know the struggles of those around us unless they elect to share them. We ALL have known this pain!

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Try confiding in someone you trust and ask them how they deal with these feelings when they experienced it. You may be surprised at what you learn.

12. Ask for Help If the Problem Persists

The feeling of being lost and lonely is common to everyone, but typically it will last for a relatively short period of time.

Most people will confess to, at one time or another, being in a “funk.” But if the problem persists longer than you feel it should, don’t ignore it.

When your ability to reason and consider things rationally becomes impaired, do not poo poo the problem away and think it isn’t worthy of attention. Seek medical help.

Afraid to ask for help? Here’s how to change your outlook to aim high!

Final Thoughts

Loneliness and a sense of feeling lost can in many ways be extremely painful and difficult to deal with at best. However, these feelings can also serve as a catalyst for change in our lives if we acknowledge them and act.

Above anything, cherish your mental well being and don’t underestimate its worth. Seek professional guidance if you’re unable to distinguish between a sense of freedom for yourself and a sense of despair.

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Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

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