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10 Things To Remember When Dealing With Depression

10 Things To Remember When Dealing With Depression

There is no start or end date for depression. You find yourself unraveling until you’re in too deep. However, you can learn to live with depression in a whole-hearted way with dignity. Here are a few things to remember:

1. It’s OK To Do Nothing

One of the most persistent feelings of depression is guilt. You feel guilty that you’re depressed, inconveniencing others, can’t hold a job, have no friends, and so on. Guilt will take over your feelings. You will feel trapped in your head. Let it all go. Don’t push yourself. Keep your activities small, light, and close-ended. You don’t need to “get out of the house” everyday. Stay still and listen.

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2. Somebody’s Dog Needs Walking

Eventually, you may need to get out of the house. Even, if only once a week. Walking a neighbor’s dog is one of the most therapeutic ways to get some sun, Vitamin D, and feel okay. It may just take 20 minutes but it will make a big difference.

3. Put On Your Shoes

This is by far the hardest, especially on the weekends without the demand of work. Putting on your shoes is symbolic. It says you’re ready for anything. It represents movement even if it’s from the couch to the kitchen. You may notice that with your shoes on you get ideas to take a walk, sit on the porch, or maybe go grocery shopping. It helps.

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4. Join Support Groups

Dailystrength.com has several support groups for Depression. Find the right forum, introduce yourself, share your rants, connect with others, and decompress. Helping someone else out there about how you feel can help you.

5. It’s Supposed To Hurt

Feel the pain. Drugs, alcohol, porn or food won’t make it disappear. It won’t help you relax. It will just add another 6 months, a year, or 5 years to your struggle.Turn to books, short walks, or maybe a movie. Keep it simple. Life is complicated enough with depression alone.

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6. Eat At Home Whenever Possible

Healthy food can be a pain to cook when your energy is at zero. It can be expensive to buy. It takes time. Do it anyway. Perhaps on Mondays, make and drink a healthy smoothie. Add healthy fats for your brain like Omega 3s, flaxseed oil, etc. to give your smoothie a boost.

7. Have A Simple Routine

Have something you do at least once a week. It could be: walking the dog, putting on your shoes, a walk around the block upon rising, tea before bed, or 5 minutes of journal writing on Wednesdays. The momentum will help rebuild your sense of confidence and control over your life.

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8. Stay In Bed

“What you resist persists”, goes the saying. Don’t attempt to “shake off” depression by planning a major vacation, spending a lot of money, or starting a new exercise program. These are sneaky little ways of self-sabotage only to “hate” your life even more. Stay in bed. Feel the pain. Do your once a week routine, drink your smoothie, and go back to bed.  Soon or later your once a week routine will turn into a few days and so on. Trust the process.

9. Protect Yourself

Keep “happy” people at bay. Seriously.  Depression is a sensitive issue and the last thing you need is someone saying, “get over it” or “oh, you’ll feel better tomorrow”. Send a quick email or note to “happy” people that you need some downtime. Tell them when to check in with you: every 2 weeks, a month, etc. Some will persist, but set your boundaries to keep you healthy. During this “cave time”, you may notice that the only friends you have are other depressed people you meet online or in groups. Seeing yourself in others empowers you to change and take control of your own life.

10. Buy Good Sheets

If you’re spending lots of time in bed, you might as well make it comfortable. Get hi-quality sheets. This is a small step but it’s a step in the right direction towards learning to take care of your own needs.

Life is a perpetual cycle of do-overs. Establishing these steps will help you the next time depression slips in and remind you of how to come back to yourself again.

Featured photo credit: http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/ via Marisa McClellan

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Last Updated on November 15, 2018

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

Success In Reaching Goals Is Determined By Mindset

What do you think it takes to achieve your goals? Hard work? Lots of actions? While these are paramount to becoming successful in reaching our goals, neither of these are possible without a positive mindset.

As humans, we naturally tend to lean towards a negative outlook when it comes to our hopes and dreams. We are prone to believing that we have limitations either from within ourselves or from external forces keeping us from truly getting to where we want to be in life. Our tendency to think that we’ll “believe it when we see it” suggests that our mindsets are focused on our goals not really being attainable until they’ve been achieved. The problem with this is that this common mindset fuels our limiting beliefs and shows a lack of faith in ourselves.

The Success Mindset

Success in achieving our goals comes down to a ‘success mindset’. Successful mindsets are those focused on victory, based on positive mental attitudes, empowering inclinations and good habits. Acquiring a success mindset is the sure-fire way to dramatically increase your chance to achieve your goals.

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The idea that achieving our goals comes down to our habits and actions is actually a typical type of mindset that misses a crucial point; that our mindset is, in fact, the determiner of our energy and what actions we take. A negative mindset will tend to create negative actions and similarly if we have a mindset that will only set into action once we see ‘proof’ that our goals are achievable, then the road will be much longer and arduous. This is why, instead of thinking “I’ll believe it when I see it”, a success mindset will think “I’ll see it when I believe it.”

The Placebo Effect and What It Shows Us About The Power of Mindset

The placebo effect is a perfect example of how mindset really can be powerful. In scientific trials, a group of participants were told they received medication that will heal an ailment but were actually given a sugar pill that does nothing (the placebo). Yet after the trial the participants believed it’s had a positive effect – sometimes even cured their ailment even though nothing has changed. This is the power of mindset.

How do we apply this to our goals? Well, when we set goals and dreams how often do we really believe they’ll come to fruition? Have absolute faith that they can be achieved? Have a complete unwavering expectation? Most of us don’t because we hold on to negative mindsets and limiting beliefs about ourselves that stop us from fully believing we are capable or that it’s at all possible. We tend to listen to the opinions of others despite them misaligning with our own or bow to societal pressures that make us believe we should think and act a certain way. There are many reasons why we possess these types of mindsets but a success mindset can be achieved.

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How To Create a Success Mindset

People with success mindsets have a particular way of perceiving things. They have positive outlooks and are able to put faith fully in their ability to succeed. With that in mind, here are a few ways that can turn a negative mindset into a successful one.

1. A Success Mindset Comes From a Growth Mindset

How does a mindset even manifest itself? It comes from the way you talk to yourself in the privacy of your own head. Realising this will go a long way towards noticing how you speak to yourself and others around you. If it’s mainly negative language you use when you talk about your goals and aspirations then this is an example of a fixed mindset.

A negative mindset brings with it a huge number of limiting beliefs. It creates a fixed mindset – one that can’t see beyond it’s own limitations. A growth mindset sees these limitations and looks beyond them – it finds ways to overcome obstacles and believes that this will result in success. When you think of your goal, a fixed mindset may think “what if I fail?” A growth mindset would look at the same goal and think “failures happen but that doesn’t mean I won’t be successful.”

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There’s a lot of power in changing your perspective.

2. Look For The Successes

It’s really important to get your mind focused on positive aspects of your goal. Finding inspiration through others can be really uplifting and keep you on track with developing your success mindset; reinforcing your belief that your dreams can be achieved. Find people that you can talk with about how they achieved their goals and seek out and surround yourself with positive people. This is crucial if you’re learning to develop a positive mindset.

3. Eliminate Negativity

You can come up against a lot of negativity sometimes either through other people or within yourself. Understanding that other people’s negative opinions are created through their own fears and limiting beliefs will go a long way in sustaining your success mindset. But for a lot of us, negative chatter can come from within and these usually manifest as negative words such as can’t, won’t, shouldn’t. Sometimes, when we think of how we’re going to achieve our goals, statements in our minds come out as negative absolutes: ‘It never works out for me’ or ‘I always fail.’

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When you notice these coming up you need to turn them around with ‘It always works out for me!’ and ‘I never fail!’ The trick is to believe it no matter what’s happened in the past. Remember that every new day is a clean slate and for you to adjust your mindset.

4. Create a Vision

Envisioning your end goal and seeing it in your mind is an important trait of a success mindset. Allowing ourselves to imagine our success creates a powerful excitement that shouldn’t be underestimated. When our brain becomes excited at the thought of achieving our goals, we become more committed, work harder towards achieving it and more likely to do whatever it takes to make it happen.

If this involves creating a vision board that you can look at to remind yourself every day then go for it. Small techniques like this go a long way in sustaining your success mindset and shouldn’t be dismissed.

An Inspirational Story…

For centuries experts said that running a mile in under 4 minutes was humanly impossible. On the 6th May 1954, Rodger Bannister did just that. As part of his training, Bannister relentlessly visualised the achievement, believing he could accomplish what everyone said wasn’t possible…and he did it.

What’s more amazing is that, as soon as Bannister achieved the 4-minute mile, more and more people also achieved it. How was this possible after so many years of no one achieving it? Because in people’s minds it was suddenly possible – once people knew that it was achievable it created a mindset of success and now, after over fifty years since Bannister did the ‘impossible’, his record has been lowered by 17 seconds – the power of the success mindset!

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