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10 Things Parents Should Stop Expecting For Their Children

10 Things Parents Should Stop Expecting For Their Children

Every parent has a sense of responsibility towards their children. Through their affection and love, they also expect their kids to show intense appreciation for whatever they have given to them. However, nothing is perfect in any relationship. Amazing rewards and difficult suffering are what our kids offer to us. Loving our children means that we have to adjust our thoughts and not set the bar too high for them. Tolerating their misbehavior means understanding that children will always be children, and they can be sneaky, irritating, and discomforting. Here are some things you should not expect for your children.

1. A perfect report card

We all want our children to get great grades, something we can be proud of and brag about to our friends and relatives. But children have different ways to respond to education. Most children need to be guided and nurtured through the education process. Even Albert Einstein and Steve Jobs didn’t get A’s in elementary school. Offer them the opportunity to grow and they may end up earning better grades with time.

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2. A sudden and abrupt change to who you want them to be

Possibly your son or daughter loves to cry for anything they want and this irritates you or they love to watch TV over doing their assignments, you should make it clear that you want them to change and improve their behavior. It is understandable to have standard and requirements that will push to become better kids, but don’t expect this improvement to be swift and sudden. Sometimes change can be gradual and progressive.

3. They will only do what you tell them rather than what you do

You should understand that children can be more reactive than responsive in certain situations. They are not robotic and are more likely to do what they see you do rather than what they hear you say. Try to lead by example. If you want them not to lie, don’t lie to them. If you don’t want them to use obscene words, don’t use them yourself.

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4. They will always be grateful for everything you have given them

Expecting that they will be more than thankful for the school expenses you take care of or that you provide them with good food and cool clothes may be expecting too much. Children are not perfect and often ungrateful; they can believe that it is simply their right to have these things, and that as a parent you should fix everything. It is better to inculcate the concept of gratitude in them rather than expect them to be grateful for everything you have given them.

5. They will fit into the idea of what you want them to be

You may love the neighbor’s daughter for always being decent and speaking intelligently. You may expect the same from your kids and try to demand this from them. Yet it is very difficult to make them fit into the idea of what you want them to be because they are nurtured under a different environment and have different personalities, strengths, and weaknesses. It is best to work with the positive qualities you see in them rather than condemn or expect too much from them.

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6. They will always be forgiving

Children can be stressed out sometimes. Parents could suddenly get a divorce, or move to another country, or lose their jobs and put the family on a financial strain. Children cannot always be forgiving when they are caught as victims and get so emotionally involved in something they are not responsible for. It is best to practice forgiveness first and trust they will do the same with time.

7. They will not be concerned about how you treat each other

It will be best to manage your emotions in front of your kids. The emotions they should see you display should be positive ones. If you talk down to your spouse, you should expect the same from them when they eventually grow up.

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8. That everything is okay

Everything is never okay. Every kid has his or her struggles, and yours is no exception. Try to be there for them through their insecurities. Reach out to them to gain knowledge of what they are going through. Kids will always need your understanding rather than you assumptions.

9. They will not try to get away with anything

Sometimes, allowing your kids to learn a life lesson from a situation can make them better persons more than punishing them would. They are not perfect and will make mistakes. Yet let them understand that there are consequences for every action. This is better than pushing them to make more bad choices by covering up their every action. Be open and offer room for little errors.

10. They will never get it wrong

I remember when I misplaced forty dollars when I was sent on an errand as a child. I had gone to play at a friend’s house rather than just going to buy what my mother sent me. Even before returning home or before my mom gave me a scolding, I felt terrible about it. As parents, we make mistakes. My mistakes sometimes are due not only to negligence, but also overconfidence. Children shouldn’t have an umbrella of perfection hovering over them.

Featured photo credit: http://www.pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Casey Imafidon

Specialized in motivation and personal growth, providing advice to make readers fulfilled and spurred on to achieve all that they desire in life.

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Last Updated on July 18, 2019

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

What Makes People Happy? 20 Secrets of “Always Happy” People

Some people just seem to float through life with a relentless sense of happiness – through the toughest of times, they’re unfazed and aloof, stopping to smell the roses and drinking out of a glass half full.

They may not have much to be happy about, but the simplicity behind that fact itself may make them happy.

It’s all a matter of perspective, conscious effort and self-awareness. Listed below are a number of reasons why some people are always happy.

1. They Manage Their Expectations

They’re not crushed when they don’t get what they want – or misled into expecting to get the most out of every situation. They approach every situation pragmatically, hoping for the best but being prepared for the worst.

2. They Don’t Set Unrealistic Standards

Similar to the last point, they don’t live their lives in a constant pursuit towards impossible visions of perfection, only to always find themselves falling short of what they want.

3. They Don’t Take Anything for Granted

Happiness rests with feeling fulfilled – those who fail to stop and appreciate what they have every now and again will never experience true fulfillment.

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4. They’re Not Materialistic

There are arguing viewpoints on whether or not money can really buy happiness; if it can, then we know from experience that we can never be satisfied because there will always be something newer or better that we want. Who has ever had enough money?

5. They Don’t Dwell

They don’t sweat the small things or waste time worrying about things that don’t really matter at the end of the day. They don’t let negative thoughts latch onto them and drain them or distract them. Life’s too short to worry.

6. They Care About Themselves First

They’re independent, care for themselves and understand that they must put their needs first in order to accommodate the needs of others.

They indulge, aim to get what they want, make time for themselves and are extremely self-reliant.

7. They Enjoy the Little Things

They stop to smell the roses. They’re accustomed to find serenity when it’s available, to welcome entertainment or a stimulating discussion with a stranger when it crosses their path. They don’t overlook the small things in life that can be just as important.

8. They Can Adapt

They’re not afraid of change and they work to make the most out of new circumstances, good or bad. They thrive under pressure, are not overwhelmed easily and always embrace a change of pace.

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9. They Experiment

They try new things, experience new flavors and never shy away from something they have yet to experience. They never order twice from the same menu.

10. They Take Their Time

They don’t unnecessarily rush through life. They work on their own schedule to the extent that they can and maneuver through life at their own relaxing pace.

11. They Employ Different Perspectives

They’re not stuck in one perspective; a loss can result in a new opportunity, hitting rock bottom can mean that there’s no where to go but up.

12. They Seek to Learn

Their constant pursuit of knowledge keeps them inspired and interested in life. They cherish information and are on a life-long quest to learn as much as they can.

13. They Always Have a Plan

They don’t find themselves drifting without purpose. When something doesn’t go as planned, they have a plan for every letter in the alphabet to fall back on.

14. They Give Respect to Get It

They are respectful and, in turn, are seen as respectable; the respect they exude earns them the respect they deserve.

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15. They Consider Every Opportunity

They always have their eyes open for a new road, a new avenue worth exploring. They know how to recognize opportune moments and pounce on them to make the most of every situation. Success is inevitable for them.

16. They Always Seek to Improve

Perpetual self-improvement is the key towards their ongoing thirst for success. Whatever it is they do, they take pride in getting better and better, from social interactions to mundane tasks. Their pursuit at being the best eventually materializes.

17. They Don’t Take Life Too Seriously

They’re not ones to get offended easily over-analyze or complicate matters. They laugh at their own faults and misfortunes.

18. They Live in the Moment

They don’t live for tomorrow or dwell on what may have happened yesterday. Every day is a new opportunity, a new chapter. They live in the now, and in doing so, get the most out of every moment.

You can learn how to do so too: How to Live in the Moment and Stop Worrying About the Past or Future

19. They Say Yes

Much more often than they say no. They don’t have to be badgered to go out, don’t shy away from new opportunities or anything that may seem inconvenient.

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20. They’re Self-Aware

Most important, they’re wholly aware of themselves. They self-reflect and are conscious of their states of mind. If somethings bothering them, they fix it.

We’re all susceptible to feeling down every now and again, but we are all equipped with the necessary solutions that just have to be discovered.

Lack of confidence, inability to feel fulfilled, and susceptibility to stress are all matters that can be controlled through the way we handle our lives and perceive our circumstances.

Learn about How Self-Reflection Gives You a Happier and More Successful Life.

Final Thoughts

The main philosophy employed by the happiest includes the idea that life’s simply too short: life’s too short to let things get you down, to take things for granted, to pursue absolute and unrealistic perfection.

For some, employing these characteristics is a second nature – they do it without knowing. For others, a conscious effort must be put forth every now and again. Self-Awareness is key.

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Featured photo credit: Charles Postiaux via unsplash.com

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