Advertising
Advertising

10 Things Only Healthy Couples Understand

10 Things Only Healthy Couples Understand

It is no secret that thriving relationships take work and are only successful if both sides put in the effort to maintain them. But what are some of the keys to nourishing a healthy relationship? Read on to find out.

1. They accept their partner as he or she is

There is no pressure to change one another, because both of you know that no one is perfect and that everyone has their flaws. Instead of dwelling on the shortcomings you embrace their strengths and are grateful for finding such a great partner. And if they want to improve themselves in anyway you are 100 percent behind them, cheering them on all the way.

Advertising

2. They ask how each others’ day was

The moment that they walk through the door, they take a moment and ask how each others’ day went. It may be a quick check-in or a longer discussion, but that moment of contact is crucial for couples to reconnect after a busy day and be clued in to what happened to their significant other while they were apart.

3. They never bring up past sore points in current arguments

Couples that have healthy relationships know not to bring up sensitive topics from past arguments, because they know that it will only escalate the current disagreement. They have learned that fighting should be fair and that dwelling on past low points will only open wounds and be counterproductive to figuring out a solution for the issue at hand.

Advertising

4. They trust one another with the other gender

There is a great amount of trust in one another that they honor their relationship and not stray. They trust that if their partner has a friend of the opposite sex, that they are just a friend and nothing more. They have built this trust by demonstrating honesty with one another and expecting the same in return.

5. They fully support each others’ passions

Couple who are in a thriving relationship, support each others’ hobbies and passions without hesitation. They know that if their partner is doing something that truly makes them happy, then their relationship will directly benefit from it as a result.

Advertising

6. They know the importance of compromise

They understand that relationships take work and are willing to work things out so both parties are happy with all the decisions that are made together. Their is a mutral understanding that sometimes there is a little give and take, but that ultimately each member has only the best interests in mind for everyone involved.

7. They show appreciation for the small everyday things

Grand sweeping gestures are always exciting for couples to give to each other, but it is the small every day things that are met with deeper gratitude. Sparkling jewelry might blow her mind in the moment, but helping out with the dishes on a consistent basis will stay in her mind longer and will be met with a true appreciation that you are putting in effort to maintain the relationship.

Advertising

8. They compliment each other frequently

Couples who have flourishing relationships, know that it is important to compliment each other frequently to boost each others’ confidence. They know firsthand that nothing compares to getting praise from their significant other and they are bound to return the favor often.

9. They don’t take themselves too seriously

Couples that are able to maintain a healthy relationship make sure to add laughter to the mix, whether it is through inside jokes or having silly pet names that they can call each other at home.

10. They are straightforward with each other

An important contributing factor to healthy relationships is that the lines of communication are clear and that each party says what is on their mind, instead of beating around the bush. They know that their partner is not a mind-reader and that they have to be direct if they want their partner to know what is on their mind.

Featured photo credit: Pixabay via pixabay.com

More by this author

10 Reasons Why You Should Have A Drummer Girlfriend 10 Things Only Step-Siblings Can Relate To What It Really Feels Like To Be An Only Child Introverts Are More Successful In Life 10 Traps Most Women Over 30 Fall Into. Read This If You Want To Be The Survivors

Trending in Communication

1 5 Rules for Overcoming Adversity and Emotional Pain 2 The Gentle Art of Saying No 3 How to Say No When You Feel You Can Only Say Yes 4 9 Things to Remember When You’re Having a Bad Day 5 11 Killer Ways to Gain Confidence and Boost Your Self-Esteem

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on February 25, 2020

5 Rules for Overcoming Adversity and Emotional Pain

5 Rules for Overcoming Adversity and Emotional Pain

“Some people choose to see the ugliness in this world, the disarray. I choose to see the beauty. To believe there is an order to our days. A purpose.” – from the popular show, “Westworld”

It’s different for us all. My personal quest for purpose began with five stages of grief and one startling realization that everything’s endlessly fragile. Adversity, as it happens by rule, found me terribly unprepared, so I decided to take my time. Today, I can honestly say that I’ve grown.

Ugliness and beauty, good and evil, pain and laughter – everything in the universe consists of two forces that are opposing but complementary. In the face of difficulty, that is the only mantra you need.

Here’s how I learned it and why you should too, with five simple rules.

Advertising

1. Embrace the Complexity

Quite insidiously, adversities come in all shapes and sizes. Paralyzing physical disabilities, mind-wracking mental problems, ruthless emotional havocs, all leading to the same painful acknowledgement: all the beauty in the world cannot possibly make up for the ugliness that surrounds us. Shattered to pieces, helpless and bare naked, we sit in our therapy chairs, apologizing for being so negative.

Eventually, what it all comes down to is the nature of negative emotion. Our positives overshadow our negatives, thus wrongly teaching us that the road to well-being is paved with nothing but positive feelings and thoughts. How utterly wrong!

“If you’re not failing every now and then, it’s a sign you’re not doing anything innovative”, Woody Allen said.

It’s a classic “learn from your mistakes” rule, but in this case, it implies growing from negative experiences. Make peace with your negativities and embrace beauty and ugliness alike! Accepting this marvellously complex world just as it is will allow you to find purpose in adversity and meaning in misery.

Advertising

2. Find Balance, Regain Control

Still, accepting adversity is only the first step toward eventual victory. One can endure only so much trauma in life; if we’re not prepared to deal with difficulties in a productive way, even the minor setbacks can get us off track. Our strengths come from learning, and the best way to learn is through a series of trials and errors. Just like phases of grief or stages of drug addiction, adversities suggest a disabling loss of control, so find your way to regain it.

Some call it the coping mechanism; for others, it’s a spiritual will. However you choose to name yours, know that not all supporting systems are equally beneficial, though each is effective in its own way. Escapism was mine, but it only helped me retain the illusion of beauty. It wasn’t until I opened up toward the ugliness and accepted the naked truth that I was finally free. Whether you choose to dwell in art, religion and spiritualism, thus feeding your resilience from within or to reach out to others for help, choose wisely.

Whatever the means, the second rule is a golden one: find your inner balance and stick to it. Eventually, it will lead you out of the vicious circle.

3. Fight with Patience

My bargaining turned in depression with a single touch. Fearless and free, my dance instructor timidly put her hands on my shoulders and I realized, for the first time, just how tense, stiff and cloistered I was. And just like that, I started letting go. Adversities have their sneaky ways, but in my experience, becoming aware is what hurts the worst. It took me a year to recover from this little moment of self-discovery, and I know remember it as the edge of the rabbit hole.

Advertising

Some sufferings are impossible to console; I know that now. The only way to get through is to, well, get through. Depression and despair are only the beginning of the excruciatingly unnerving process that ravages the mind and shrivels the soul, and once they strike, there is no easy way back. So, fight them with patience. When your head starts spinning and your feet lose ground, go to your happy place. Over there, you’ll be reminded that nothing is forever, not even our little existential psychosis.

Take a deep breath and say “om”. When things cannot be combated, they have to be endured, so practice patience and learn to let go. Finally, keep repeating to yourself that this too shall pass.

4. Keep Swimming

Nothing is impossible, in the end. Your negative thoughts will gently pour into your positive ones, just as two streams come together to become a river. In the event of the inevitable disaster, one can only be as calm as still water. Suffering teaches patience, and the latter gives rise to flexibility. Ultimately, what is life than a series of unfortunate events and a handful of bright moments in between? If adversities are impossible to avoid, than learn to glide through as smoothly and patiently as water does with rocks.

Even if spirituality isn’t exactly your cup of tea, you have to admit that this is one solid metaphor. Staying adaptable in the face of change will soothe your panic attacks and keep you sane and sober-blooded. Even if you fail, you’ll know exactly how to breathe and face what’s in front of you once it eventually strikes again. Stay calm and visualize a better tomorrow; if anything else, it will give you strength to dive deep and weather the storm. And, in case there’s somebody’s hand to reach out to, grab it firmly and don’t let go.

Advertising

Being flexible against adversities takes a lot of learning, just as staying brave demands a lot of courage. It’s a long, arduous step-by-step routine, and you can reach the end only by swimming on. Persist, even when you fall.

5. Never Stop Searching for Inspiration

And, if it’s a guidance you need, where else to seek it than in experiences of others? Find it in art, in people around you, in chance encounters. The pure beauty of perseverance can be discovered where you expect it the least, so never stop searching for inspiration. If self-help literature soothes your pains and clears your mind, don’t let cynics discourage you. Your path toward reconciliation is nobody’s but yours to choose.

Ever heard of Nick Vujicic? Or Nando Parado? Inspiring people sound their yawps over the roofs of the world, sometimes voiceless, sometimes limbless, sometimes both. Born without arms, Jessica Cox became the most unusual certified pilot in the world, and you can rarely see her without a smile on her face. If you’ve already ripped all of your bucket lists and said goodbye to your dreams and plans, meet Sean Swarner, who’s officially became the first cancer survivor to climb Mount Everest. The stories just go on.

Make your own guidebook! Pen down your positive thoughts, cover your walls with quotes and devise your personal mantras. Whenever things get hard, they’ll be there to remind you of what you need to do. It’s the simplest of all life hacks, and one of the most effective ones.

Find beauty in the world, but never stay blind for its ugliness. However daunting, adversities and emotional pain challenge our inner strength, thus making us resilient and allowing us to grow. As soon as you recognize them as the wind in your sails instead of the devastating storm, the purpose will become simple and clear.

Featured photo credit: Unsplash via unsplash.com

Read Next