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10 Reasons Why Today Should be Your Someday

10 Reasons Why Today Should be Your Someday

When you imagine your future, what exactly do you see? Do you see someone in rapid pursuit of their goals? Or do you see someone who wanted to achieve a lot in life, but never really did much to make it happen?

If you’re reading this right now, I know you’re that first person, not the second one.

There’s no better time than the present to take action. I want to inspire you, and light a fire inside of you. I want to create some urgency and remind you that putting things off for tomorrow, isn’t always the best course of action.  Below are few reasons why today is the best possible day you can choose to start chasing those dreams and goals you want so bad.

1. You’ll never be “ready”

It’s true, sometimes and in certain situations you actually can be “ready”. But for the majority of things that really matter, the experiences and challenges that will change your life, you can’t be 100% ready. And if you keep waiting for that readiness to appear, you’ll wait forever and before you know it, you’ve missed your chance.

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2. Your competition started yesterday

While you were waiting to get ready, your competition was working, which means you’ve got some ground to make up. The longer you wait, the bigger that gap is going to get. Don’t get discouraged and say, “Well I’m already behind, why bother now?”. It’s tempting, but if it’s something you really want to get done, you’ve got to get moving.

3. Planning is pointless when it’s not followed by action

You know all those lavish, detailed, calculated plans you’ve been making? They’ll be nothing more than an absolute waste of time if you don’t act on those plans. Isn’t that the whole reason for planning, to actually do something? You’re wasting valuable time by not executing on those plans today.

4. You deserve to happy

Happiness is something we’re all entitled to. But many times, happiness is a direct product of you taking life by the horns and making something happen. Today  should be the day you make something happen. Today should be the day you get happy about life again.

5. You deserve to be excited

So many people dread Monday mornings. Is there something inherently wrong about Monday? Is Monday plotting an evil scheme against you and your dreams? Of course not. You deserve to wake up every day with an excitement to take on the day. Why make yourself wait for that?

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6. There’s no refund for lost time

Time is the one thing that you can never get back. Once it’s gone, it’s gone for good. The last thing you want to do is to wait 20 years, then look back and wonder “what-if?” It’s okay to fail. It’s okay to stumble, but to never take action isn’t something you should accept. The longer you wait, the less time you have to reach those goals.

7. You need to get comfortable with being uncomfortable

You know that warm fuzzy place where life is so easy and everything makes sense? That’s your comfort zone, and nothing amazing happens there. If you want to make progress towards achieving things that matter in life, you have to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.

All of your growth and progress is going to happen right outside of your comfort zone. And the longer you wait, the harder it’s going to be to break out of your comfort zone.

8. Your excuses suck

A lack of time, money, resources, skills, and knowledge are nothing more than excuses that are preventing you from achieving those goals you want so badly. If you’re productive and prioritize correctly, you’ll easily find the time you need.

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Money is often a self inflicted barrier. There are ways to start now, with the money you have, you just need to look deeper. And if the money turns out to be a necessity, I’m sure that with 100% focus, you’ll find  a way to get it.

Resources, like money, can be found when you really focus on getting them.

Skills and knowledge are easier to find when you’re taking action.

9. You’re more than a passenger in life

You can’t live life with a third person perspective. No one else in charge of your life except for you, and that’s a good thing. That means that you have all the permission you need to steer your life in a direction that moves you closer to those goals that really matter.

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10. Practice makes perfect

Chances are, whatever it is you want to achieve, it’s going to take some practice to get it done. But you won’t get that practice if you don’t take action. And the sooner you take action, the sooner you’ll start making progress.

Featured photo credit: photosteve101 via flickr.com

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Tony Robinson

Tony writes about mental strength, happiness and motivation at Lifehack.

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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