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10 Powerful Movie Quotes That Will Change Our Lives

10 Powerful Movie Quotes That Will Change Our Lives

Do we substitute happiness with food, pleasure, power, or technology? Let’s change our lives. Stop using “artificial ingredients”.   Time to live in Wisdom!  Here are 10 movie quotes to start with.

1. Know the difference between the pursuit of happiness and the happiness of pursuit

In the recently released 2014 movie “Hector and the Search for Happiness”, Hector (played by Simon Pegg) decides to embark on a journey to find happiness.

Professor Coreman (played by Christopher Plummer) states that “We should concern ourselves not so much with the pursuit of happiness, but with the happiness of pursuit”.

The journey is the key. So let’s think about what our journey has revealed to us?

2. “Pay it Forward”

In the 2000 movie “Pay it Forward”, Eugene Simonet (played by Kevin Spacey) challenges his seventh grade social studies class to complete a very special class project. Help three people accomplish something that they can’t do by themselves. Then ask them to help three people to “Pay it Forward”. It will give your life a new meaning.

3. Focus on “Doing”not “Trying”

In the 1979 Star Wars movie, “The Empire Strikes Back“, Yoda (voice played by Frank Oz) mentors young Luke Skywalker (played by Mark Hamill) on what it takes to be a Jedi Master.

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Yoda explains: “No! Try not. Do, or do not. There is no try.

Think about, what word you use more often, “try” or do”?

4. Ask yourself: Is there a normal life?

In the 1993 movie “Tombstone” Doc Holiday (played by Val Kilmer) comments on Wyatt Earp’s (played by Kurt Russell) desire to live a normal life.

Doc answers: “There’s no normal life….there’s just life.”

Are our expectations of how our life will go limiting our imagination and opportunities?

5. Find out what’s in your box of chocolates

In the 2000 movie “Forest Gump (played by Tom Hanks), Forest comments:

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“Mama always said life was like a box of chocolates. You never know what you’re gonna get!”

Be ready to taste them all!

6. Accept that our lives are bound by each other

In the 2012 movie, “Cloud Atlas“, Ursula (the young one played by Laura Vietzin and the old one played by Susan Sarandon) says:

“Our lives are not our own. We are bound to others, Past and Present. And by each crime and every kindness, we build our Future.”

Do you appreciate the impact of the relationships you have had with the people in you life?  Or should you reconnect with some of them?

7. Wonder: Is anything free?

In the 2012 remake movie, “True Grit“, Mattie Ross (played by Hailee Steinfeld) says:

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“You must pay for everything in this world, one way and another. There is nothing free except the grace of God.”

Coming from a 14 year old girl who is determined to avenge her father’s murder, that is a harsh message to accept. Visit the Film Doctor to better understand this quote. Are we willing to pay the bill for everything we do or don’t do?

8. Realize that the many are served by the few

In the 1982 Star Trek Movie, “The Wrath of Khan”  Spock (played by Leonard Nemoy) and Captain Kirk (played by William Shatner) combine to say:

“The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few, or the one.” 

There are real-life heroes living in our midst that do this every day. They humbly serve in our fire, police, emergency, and armed forces units. We should appreciate them or even become one of them.

9. Realize the need of alterations

In the 1985 western film,Silverado“, Stella (played by Linda Hunt) states from behind her bar:

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“The world is what you make of it, friend.  If it doesn’t fit, you make alterations”.

She was standing on a ramp that she had installed since she was a bit shorter in height than most bartenders. Have you made any changes lately?

10. Understand that fear is the “mind-killer”

In the SyFy 1984 movie “Dune”, Paul Atreides (played by Kyle MacLachlan) is tested by a member of the Bene Gesserit Sisterhood. The Reverend Mother Gaius Helen Mohiam (played by Sian Phillips) applies nerve-induced pain. As Paul endures this test, he says to himself:

“I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear… And when it is gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path. Where the fear is gone there will be nothing. Only I will remain.”

Let’s face our fear the way Paul did!

Featured photo credit: Genea-Musings via 4.bp.blogspot.com

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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