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10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

Have you ever wondered what happens after all of those fairy tales marriages? What do Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Rapunzel, and all other beauties and their charming princes do to make the happily-ever-after work out?

Well, it doesn’t take a genius to guess, right? If you are in a healthy relationship, or are happily married, you won’t need to draw inspirations from Disney characters. You have your own fairy tale, written only by you two.

So, what actually makes us happy couples? We don’t need gems, bling, cash, and all other worldly valuables to stay content. There are little little things we do everyday that are capable of making us joyous. My husband and I are happily married, and what we do everyday is not worth millions dollars!

1. They communicate.

Communicating is a form of bonding. Having a real conversation at least once a day is enough to wipe away any form of misunderstanding. If you are bothered about something or have an objection to something your partner is doing, talk.

Tell that to your companion, strike up a conversation. Please do not nag or complain, only seeing the faults in them. Appreciate the positives, rather than the negatives. Keeping your partner in the loop of your daily activities is another form of communication. In this way, you are not missing out on each other’s day-to-day affairs.

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2. They grow common interest.

Sharing some common interests (not all) with your partner is a sign of healthy relationship. Happy couples tend to enjoy each other’s company no matter what they are doing.

You may not be fond of his obsession with NFL, or he may not enjoy watching Desperate Housewives with you, but there are certain things that you two can do together.

Let’s take cooking as an example. You guys can cook up meals you always found challenging. Or, start gardening. Take baby steps, and you two can grow a beautiful garden together.

3. They spend time together.

With a fast paced life, it is hard to find spare time for personal entertainment. Why don’t you take at least half an hour from your busy schedule, and utilize it? You can meet up for lunch rendezvous, or go for a grocery date.

On the weekends do something different. For instance, go to a drive-in movie. Even if you are not interested in the movie, you can always sit back with popcorn and drinks, and enjoy each other’s company under the sky.

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4. They cuddle huddle.

Going to bed at the same time doesn’t always mean having sex. You can simply lie down with your partner under the blanket and cuddle huddle. Do you know that there has been research that shows how smelling your partner while cuddling has a positive effect on your relationship?

The body odor of your partner has certain chemical keys that instigate comfort or a sense of security in you. Therefore, cuddling is a special response to a healthy relationship.

5. They hug and peck.

For some, this may sound like a silly thing to do everyday (I know few couples who don’t hug and kiss each other. Only God knows why.), but this “silly” matter is actually a powerful medicine to keep you two happy.

Before heading out to work, and after coming back home, commit to squeezy, beary hugs and kisses. Make this a ritual; you two won’t be able to let go of it, trust me! Happy couples usually stamp kisses and cling on their partners whenever they feel like. I guess that’s why they are happy, right?

6. They signify I “heart” you everyday.

Expressing “I Love You” all the time may seem monotonous to you, but that’s not true. I call these the “magic words.” Uttering the magic words twice a day is sufficient, especially before going to work, and before hitting the sack. You and your partner know how much you care and love each other. Regardless, verbalize the words because “it’s only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away.” — Boyzone

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7. They have a sense of humor.

One of the reasons why I fell in love with my man was because of his sense of humor. He cracks the silliest of jokes at unexpected times. And he has the ability to make me laugh for hours! Cracking jokes every now and then has a positive impact on a relationship.

I can’t imagine my life surrounded by serious people. I need humor. And so do you! Happy couples know the right time to be witty. And laughing even at the lamest jokes on earth can increase the level of love between the two of you.

8. They switch off their ringers.

Most of your time is spent at work. The other time is spent doing miscellaneous works, including eating and sleeping. So whatever leftover time you have, utilize it for each other. Stop browsing the internet, socializing in all respects, and simply hit the power button. Switch off your phones, and be connected with your partner face to face. You’ll love it!

9. They believe in PDA.

Happy couples enjoy PDA. No, it’s not a Personal Digital Assistant. It stands for Public Display of Affection. Walking while holding hands or just a random hug while waiting on the signals, a little kiss on the cheeks, or my personal favorite, acting strangers.

Sometimes, while waiting for the train, I will simply strike up a conversation with my partner as if I met him for the first time, and would continue doing that till we reach our destination. It brings enough entertainment to last for the day.

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10. They plan their futures together.

Planning your futures can take two forms. One, you sit down with calendars, calculators, and note pads. Two, you have a deep and meaningful conversations on future plans for your lives together. For example, happy couples have a custom of planning everything together, regardless of how trivial the matter is.

You two are a team, so work like a team. Make everything happen together, whether it is related to the children, you sex life, your career, or your plans for buying a house. Planning makes your bond stronger and enriches your journey together.

Do you know the definition of happy couple? It is: he does what she wants, and she does what she wants.

Just kidding! Happy couples never have the same character. And they have a good understanding of their differences. It doesn’t take a lot of effort; small gestures are enough to make you two live happily ever after!

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Sumaiya Kabir

Sumaiya is a passionate writer who shares thoughts and ideas to help people improve themselves.

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Published on May 4, 2021

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

How To Spot Fake People (And Ways To Deal With Them)

They say we are the average of the five persons we spend the most time with. For a minute, consider the people around you. Are they truly who your “tribe” should be or who you aspire to become in the future? Are they really genuine people who want to see you succeed? Or are they fake people who don’t really want to see you happy?

In this article, I’ll review why it is important to surround yourself with genuine individuals—the ones who care, bring something to our table, and first and foremost, who leave all fakeness behind.

How to Spot Fake People?

When you’ve been working in the helping professions for a while, spotting fake people gets a bit easier. There are some very clear signs that the person you are looking at is hiding something, acting somehow, or simply wanting to get somewhere. Most often, there is a secondary gain—perhaps attention, sympathy, or even a promotion.

Whatever it is, you’re better off working their true agenda and staying the hell away. Here are some things you should look out for to help spot fake people.

1. Full of Themselves

Fake people like to show off. They love looking at themselves in the mirror. They collect photos and videos of every single achievement they had and every part of their body and claim to be the “best at what they do.”

Most of these people are actually not that good in real life. But they act like they are and ensure that they appear better than the next person. The issue for you is that you may find yourself always feeling “beneath” them and irritated at their constant need to be in the spotlight.

2. Murky in Expressing Their Emotions

Have you ever tried having a deep and meaningful conversation with a fake person? It’s almost impossible. It’s because they have limited emotional intelligence and don’t know how they truly feel deep down—and partly because they don’t want to have their true emotions exposed, no matter how normal these might be.

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It’s much harder to say “I’m the best at what I do” while simultaneously sharing “average” emotions with “equal” people.

3. Zero Self-Reflection

To grow, we must accept feedback from others. We must be open to our strengths and to our weaknesses. We must accept that we all come in different shapes and can always improve.

Self-reflection requires us to think, forgive, admit fault, and learn from our mistakes. But to do that, we have to be able to adopt a level of genuineness and depth that fake people don’t routinely have. A fake person generally never apologizes, but when they do, it is often followed with a “but” in the next breath.

4. Unrealistic Perceptions

Fake people most often have an unrealistic perception of the world—things that they want to portray to others (pseudo achievements, materialistic gains, or a made-up sense of happiness) or simply how they genuinely regard life outside themselves.

A lot of fake people hide pain, shame, and other underlying reasons in their behavior. This could explain why they can’t be authentic and/or have difficulties seeing their environment for the way it objectively is (both good and bad).

5. Love Attention

As I mentioned earlier, the biggest sign that something isn’t quite right with someone’s behavior can be established by how much they love attention. Are you being interrupted every time you speak by someone who wants to make sure that the spotlight gets reverted back to them? Is the focus always on them, no matter the topic? If yes, you’re probably dealing with a fake person.

6. People Pleaser

Appreciation feels nice but having everyone like you is even better. While it is completely unrealistic for most people to please everyone all the time, fake people seem to always say yes in pursuit of constant approval.

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Now, this is a problem for two reasons. Firstly, these people are simply saying yes to things for their own satisfaction. Secondly, they often end up changing their minds or retracting their offer for one reason or another (“I would have loved to, but my grandmother suddenly fell ill.”), leaving you in the lurch for the 100th time this year.

7. Sarcasm and Cynicism

Behind the chronic pasted smile, fake people are well known for brewing resentment, jealousy, or anger. This is because, behind the postcard life, they are often unhappy. Sarcasm and cynicism are well known to act as a defense mechanism, sometimes even a diversion—anything so they can remain feeling on top of the world, whether it is through boosting themselves or bringing people down.

8. Crappy friend

Fake people are bad friends. They don’t listen to you, your feelings, and whatever news you might have to share. In fact, you might find yourself migrating away from them when you have exciting or bad news to share, knowing that it will always end up one way—their way. In addition, you might find that they’re not available when you truly need them or worse, cancel plans at the last minute.

It’s not unusual to hear that a fake person talks constantly behind people’s backs. Let’s be honest, if they do it to others, they’re doing it to you too. If your “friend” makes you feel bad constantly, trust me, they’re not achieving their purpose, and they’re simply not a good person to have around.

The sooner you learn to spot these fake people, the sooner you can meet meaningful individuals again.

How to Cope With Fake People Moving Forward?

It is important to remind yourself that you deserve more than what you’re getting. You are worthy, valuable, precious, and just as important as the next person.

There are many ways to manage fake people. Here are some tips on how to deal with them.

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1. Boundaries

Keep your boundaries very clear. As explained in the book Unlock Your Resilience, boundaries are what keep you sane when the world tries to suffocate you. When fake people become emotional vampires, make sure to keep your distances, limit contact, and simply replace them with more valuable interactions.

2. Don’t Take Their Behavior Personally

Sadly, they most likely have behaved this way before they knew you and will continue much longer after you have moved on. It isn’t about you. It is about their inner need to meet a void that you are not responsible for. And in all honesty, unless you are a trained professional, you are unlikely to improve it anyway.

3. Be Upfront and Honest About How You Feel

If your “friend” has been hurtful or engaged in behaviors you struggle with, let them know—nicely, firmly, however you want, but let them know that they are affecting you. If it works, great. If it doesn’t, you’ll feel better and when you’re ready to move on, you’ll know you tried to reach out. Your conscience is clear.

4. Ask for Advice

If you’re unsure about what you’re seeing or feeling, ask for advice. Perhaps a relative, a good friend, or a colleague might have some input as to whether you are overreacting or seeing some genuine concerns.

Now, don’t confuse asking for advice with gossiping behind the fake person’s back because, in the end, you don’t want to stoop down to their level. However, a little reminder as to how to stay on your own wellness track can never hurt.

5. Dig Deeper

Now, this one, I offer with caution. If you are emotionally strong, up to it, guaranteed you won’t get sucked into it, and have the skills to manage, perhaps you could dig into the reasons a fake person is acting the way they do.

Have they suffered recent trauma? Have they been rejected all their lives? Is their self-esteem so low that they must resort to making themselves feel good in any way they can? Sometimes, having an understanding of a person’s behavior can help in processing it.

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6. Practice Self-Care!

Clearly, putting some distance between the fake person and yourself is probably the way to go. However, sometimes, it takes time to get there. In the meantime, make sure to practice self-care, be gentle with yourself, and compensate with lots of positives!

Self-care can be as simple as taking a hot shower after talking to them or declining an invitation when you’re not feeling up to the challenge.

Spotting fake people isn’t too hard. They generally glow with wanna-be vibes. However, most often, there are reasons as to why they are like this. Calling their behavior might be the first step. Providing them with support might be the second. But if these don’t work, it’s time to stay away and surround yourself with the positivity that you deserve.

Final Thoughts

Remember that life is a rollercoaster. It has good moments, tough moments, and moments you wouldn’t change for the world. So, look around and make sure that you take the time to choose the right people to share it all with.

We are the average of the five people we spend the most time with, so take a good look around and choose wisely!

More Tips on Dealing With Fake People

Featured photo credit: Priscilla Du Preez via unsplash.com

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