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10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

Have you ever wondered what happens after all of those fairy tales marriages? What do Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Rapunzel, and all other beauties and their charming princes do to make the happily-ever-after work out?

Well, it doesn’t take a genius to guess, right? If you are in a healthy relationship, or are happily married, you won’t need to draw inspirations from Disney characters. You have your own fairy tale, written only by you two.

So, what actually makes us happy couples? We don’t need gems, bling, cash, and all other worldly valuables to stay content. There are little little things we do everyday that are capable of making us joyous. My husband and I are happily married, and what we do everyday is not worth millions dollars!

1. They communicate.

Communicating is a form of bonding. Having a real conversation at least once a day is enough to wipe away any form of misunderstanding. If you are bothered about something or have an objection to something your partner is doing, talk.

Tell that to your companion, strike up a conversation. Please do not nag or complain, only seeing the faults in them. Appreciate the positives, rather than the negatives. Keeping your partner in the loop of your daily activities is another form of communication. In this way, you are not missing out on each other’s day-to-day affairs.

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2. They grow common interest.

Sharing some common interests (not all) with your partner is a sign of healthy relationship. Happy couples tend to enjoy each other’s company no matter what they are doing.

You may not be fond of his obsession with NFL, or he may not enjoy watching Desperate Housewives with you, but there are certain things that you two can do together.

Let’s take cooking as an example. You guys can cook up meals you always found challenging. Or, start gardening. Take baby steps, and you two can grow a beautiful garden together.

3. They spend time together.

With a fast paced life, it is hard to find spare time for personal entertainment. Why don’t you take at least half an hour from your busy schedule, and utilize it? You can meet up for lunch rendezvous, or go for a grocery date.

On the weekends do something different. For instance, go to a drive-in movie. Even if you are not interested in the movie, you can always sit back with popcorn and drinks, and enjoy each other’s company under the sky.

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4. They cuddle huddle.

Going to bed at the same time doesn’t always mean having sex. You can simply lie down with your partner under the blanket and cuddle huddle. Do you know that there has been research that shows how smelling your partner while cuddling has a positive effect on your relationship?

The body odor of your partner has certain chemical keys that instigate comfort or a sense of security in you. Therefore, cuddling is a special response to a healthy relationship.

5. They hug and peck.

For some, this may sound like a silly thing to do everyday (I know few couples who don’t hug and kiss each other. Only God knows why.), but this “silly” matter is actually a powerful medicine to keep you two happy.

Before heading out to work, and after coming back home, commit to squeezy, beary hugs and kisses. Make this a ritual; you two won’t be able to let go of it, trust me! Happy couples usually stamp kisses and cling on their partners whenever they feel like. I guess that’s why they are happy, right?

6. They signify I “heart” you everyday.

Expressing “I Love You” all the time may seem monotonous to you, but that’s not true. I call these the “magic words.” Uttering the magic words twice a day is sufficient, especially before going to work, and before hitting the sack. You and your partner know how much you care and love each other. Regardless, verbalize the words because “it’s only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away.” — Boyzone

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7. They have a sense of humor.

One of the reasons why I fell in love with my man was because of his sense of humor. He cracks the silliest of jokes at unexpected times. And he has the ability to make me laugh for hours! Cracking jokes every now and then has a positive impact on a relationship.

I can’t imagine my life surrounded by serious people. I need humor. And so do you! Happy couples know the right time to be witty. And laughing even at the lamest jokes on earth can increase the level of love between the two of you.

8. They switch off their ringers.

Most of your time is spent at work. The other time is spent doing miscellaneous works, including eating and sleeping. So whatever leftover time you have, utilize it for each other. Stop browsing the internet, socializing in all respects, and simply hit the power button. Switch off your phones, and be connected with your partner face to face. You’ll love it!

9. They believe in PDA.

Happy couples enjoy PDA. No, it’s not a Personal Digital Assistant. It stands for Public Display of Affection. Walking while holding hands or just a random hug while waiting on the signals, a little kiss on the cheeks, or my personal favorite, acting strangers.

Sometimes, while waiting for the train, I will simply strike up a conversation with my partner as if I met him for the first time, and would continue doing that till we reach our destination. It brings enough entertainment to last for the day.

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10. They plan their futures together.

Planning your futures can take two forms. One, you sit down with calendars, calculators, and note pads. Two, you have a deep and meaningful conversations on future plans for your lives together. For example, happy couples have a custom of planning everything together, regardless of how trivial the matter is.

You two are a team, so work like a team. Make everything happen together, whether it is related to the children, you sex life, your career, or your plans for buying a house. Planning makes your bond stronger and enriches your journey together.

Do you know the definition of happy couple? It is: he does what she wants, and she does what she wants.

Just kidding! Happy couples never have the same character. And they have a good understanding of their differences. It doesn’t take a lot of effort; small gestures are enough to make you two live happily ever after!

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Last Updated on April 6, 2020

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

10 Powerful Ways to Influence People Positively

Most discussions on positively influencing others eventually touch on Dale Carnegie’s seminal work, How to Win Friends and Influence People. Written more than 83 years ago, the book touches on a core component of human interaction, building strong relationships. It is no wonder why.

Everything that we do hinges on our ability to connect with others and formulate deep relationships. You cannot sell a house, buy a house, advance in most careers, sell a product, pitch a story, teach a course, etc. without building healthy relationships. Managers get the best results from their teams, not through brute force, but to careful appeals to their sensibilities, occasional withdrawals from the reservoir of respect they’ve built. Using these tactics, they can influence others to excellence, to productivity, and to success.

Carnegie’s book is great. Of course, there are other resources too. Most of us have someone in our lives who positively influences us. The truth is positively influencing people is about centering the humanity of others. Chances are, you know someone who is really good at making others feel like stars. They can get you to do things that the average person cannot. Where the requests of others sound like fingernails on a chalkboard, the request from this special person sounds like music to your ears. You’re delighted to not only listen but also to oblige.

So how to influence people in a positive way? Read on for tips.

1. Be Authentic

To influence people in a positive way, be authentic. Rather than being a carbon copy of someone else’s version of authenticity, uncover what it is that makes you unique.

Discover your unique take on an issue and then live up to and honor that. Once of the reasons social media influencers are so powerful is that they have carved out a niche for themselves or taken a common issue and approached it from a novel or uncommon way. People instinctually appreciate people whose public persona matches their private values.

Contradictions bother us because we crave stability. When someone professes to be one way, but lives contrary to that profession, it signals that they are confused or untrustworthy and thereby, inauthentic. Neither of these combinations bode well for positively influencing others.

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2. Listen

Growing up, my father would tell me to listen to what others said. He told me if I listened carefully, I would know all I needed to know about a person’s character, desires and needs.

To positively influence others, you must listen to what is spoken and what is left unsaid. Therein lies the explanation for what people need in order to feel validated, supported and seen. If a person feels they are invisible, and unseen by their superiors, they are less likely to be positively influenced by that person.

Listening meets a person’s primary need of validation and acceptance.

Take a look at this guide on how to be a better listener: How to Practice Active Listening (A Step-By-Step Guide)

3. Become an Expert

Most people are predisposed to listen to, if not respect, authority. If you want to positively influence others, become an authority in the area in which you seek to lead others. Research and read everything you can about the given topic, and then look for opportunities to put your education into practice.

You can argue over opinions. You cannot argue, or it is unwise to argue, over facts and experts come with facts.

4. Lead with Story

From years of working in the public relations space, I know that personal narratives, testimonials and impact stories are incredibly powerful. But I never cease to be amazed with how effective a well-timed and told story can be.

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If you want to influence people, learn to tell stories. Your stories should be related to the issue or concept you are discussing. They should be an analogy or metaphor that explains your topic in ordinary terms and in vivid detail. To learn more about how to tell powerful stories, and the ethics of storytelling, take a look at this article: How To Tell An Interesting Story In 4 Simple Steps

5. Lead by Example

It is incredibly inspiring to watch passionate, talented people at work or play. One of the reasons a person who is not an athlete can be in awe of athletic prowess is because human nature appreciates the extraordinary. When we watch the Olympics, Olympic trials, gymnastic competitions, ice skating, and other competitive sports, we can recognize the effort of people who day in and day out give their all. C

ase in point: Simone Biles. The gymnast extraordinaire won her 6TH all-around title at the U.S. Gymnastics Championships after doing a triple double. She was the first woman to do so. Watching her gave me chills. Even non-gymnasts and non-competitive athletes can appreciate the talent required to pull off such a remarkable feat.

We celebrate remarkable accomplishments and believe that their example is proof that we too can accomplish something great, even if it isn’t qualifying for the Olympics. To influence people in a positive way, we must lead by example, lead with intention and execute with excellence.

6. Catch People Doing Good

A powerful way to influence people in a positive way is to catch people doing good. Instead of looking for problems, look for successes. Look for often overlooked, but critically important things that your peers, subordinates and managers do that make the work more effective and more enjoyable.

Once you catch people doing good, name and notice their contributions.

7. Be Effusive with Praise

It did not take me long to notice a remarkable trait of a former boss. He not only began and ended meetings with praise, but he peppered praise throughout the entire meeting. He found a way to celebrate the unique attributes and skills of his team members. He was able to quickly and accurately assess what people were doing well and then let them and their colleagues know.

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Meetings were not just an occasion to go through a “To Do” list, they were opportunities to celebrate accomplishments, no matter how small they are.

8. Be Kind Rather Than Right

I am going to level with you; this one is tough. It is easy to get caught up in a cycle of proving oneself. For people who lack confidence, or people who prioritize the opinions of others, being right is important. The validation that comes with being perceived as “right” feeds one’s ego. But in the quest to be “right,” we can hurt other people. Once we’ve hurt someone by being unkind, it is much harder to get them to listen to what we’re trying to influence them to do.

The antidote to influencing others via bullying is to prioritize kindness above rightness. You can be kind and still stand firm in your position. For instance, many people think that they need others to validate their experience. If a person does not see the situation you experienced in the way you see it, you get upset. But your experience is your experience.

If you and your friends go out to eat and you get food poisoning, you do not need your friends to agree that the food served at the restaurant was problematic for you. Your own experience of getting food poisoning is all the validation you need. Therefore, taking time to be right is essentially wasted and, if you were unkind in seeking validation for your food-poison experience, now you’ve really lost points.

9. Understand a Person’s Logical, Emotional and Cooperative Needs

The Center for Creative Leadership has argued that the best way to influence others is to appeal to their logical, emotional and cooperative needs. Their logical need is their rational and educational need. Their emotional need is the information that touches them in a deeply personal manner. The cooperative need is understanding the level of cooperation various individuals need and then appropriately offering it.

The trick with this system is to understand that different people need different things. For some people, a strong emotional appeal will outweigh logical explanations. For others, having an opportunity to collaborate will override emotional connection.

If you know your audience, you will know what they need in order to be positively influenced. If you have limited information about the people whom you are attempting to influence, you will be ineffective.

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10. Understand Your Lane

If you want to positively influence others, operate from your sphere of influence. Operate from your place of expertise. Leave everything else to others. Gone are the days when being a jack of all trades is celebrated.

Most people appreciate brands that understand their target audience and then deliver on what that audience wants. When you focus on what you are uniquely gifted and qualified to do, and then offer that gift to the people who need it, you are likely more effective. This effectiveness is attractive.

You cannot positively influence others if you are more preoccupied by what others do well versus what you do well.

Final Thoughts

Influencing people is about centering your humanity. If you want to influence others positively, focus on the way you communicate and improve the relationship with yourself first.

It’s hard to influence others if you’re still trying to figure out how to communicate with yourself.

More Tips About Making Influence

Featured photo credit: Wonderlane via unsplash.com

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