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10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

10 Little Things Happy Couples Do Every Day

Have you ever wondered what happens after all of those fairy tales marriages? What do Cinderella, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White, Rapunzel, and all other beauties and their charming princes do to make the happily-ever-after work out?

Well, it doesn’t take a genius to guess, right? If you are in a healthy relationship, or are happily married, you won’t need to draw inspirations from Disney characters. You have your own fairy tale, written only by you two.

So, what actually makes us happy couples? We don’t need gems, bling, cash, and all other worldly valuables to stay content. There are little little things we do everyday that are capable of making us joyous. My husband and I are happily married, and what we do everyday is not worth millions dollars!

1. They communicate.

Communicating is a form of bonding. Having a real conversation at least once a day is enough to wipe away any form of misunderstanding. If you are bothered about something or have an objection to something your partner is doing, talk.

Tell that to your companion, strike up a conversation. Please do not nag or complain, only seeing the faults in them. Appreciate the positives, rather than the negatives. Keeping your partner in the loop of your daily activities is another form of communication. In this way, you are not missing out on each other’s day-to-day affairs.

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2. They grow common interest.

Sharing some common interests (not all) with your partner is a sign of healthy relationship. Happy couples tend to enjoy each other’s company no matter what they are doing.

You may not be fond of his obsession with NFL, or he may not enjoy watching Desperate Housewives with you, but there are certain things that you two can do together.

Let’s take cooking as an example. You guys can cook up meals you always found challenging. Or, start gardening. Take baby steps, and you two can grow a beautiful garden together.

3. They spend time together.

With a fast paced life, it is hard to find spare time for personal entertainment. Why don’t you take at least half an hour from your busy schedule, and utilize it? You can meet up for lunch rendezvous, or go for a grocery date.

On the weekends do something different. For instance, go to a drive-in movie. Even if you are not interested in the movie, you can always sit back with popcorn and drinks, and enjoy each other’s company under the sky.

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4. They cuddle huddle.

Going to bed at the same time doesn’t always mean having sex. You can simply lie down with your partner under the blanket and cuddle huddle. Do you know that there has been research that shows how smelling your partner while cuddling has a positive effect on your relationship?

The body odor of your partner has certain chemical keys that instigate comfort or a sense of security in you. Therefore, cuddling is a special response to a healthy relationship.

5. They hug and peck.

For some, this may sound like a silly thing to do everyday (I know few couples who don’t hug and kiss each other. Only God knows why.), but this “silly” matter is actually a powerful medicine to keep you two happy.

Before heading out to work, and after coming back home, commit to squeezy, beary hugs and kisses. Make this a ritual; you two won’t be able to let go of it, trust me! Happy couples usually stamp kisses and cling on their partners whenever they feel like. I guess that’s why they are happy, right?

6. They signify I “heart” you everyday.

Expressing “I Love You” all the time may seem monotonous to you, but that’s not true. I call these the “magic words.” Uttering the magic words twice a day is sufficient, especially before going to work, and before hitting the sack. You and your partner know how much you care and love each other. Regardless, verbalize the words because “it’s only words, and words are all I have, to take your heart away.” — Boyzone

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7. They have a sense of humor.

One of the reasons why I fell in love with my man was because of his sense of humor. He cracks the silliest of jokes at unexpected times. And he has the ability to make me laugh for hours! Cracking jokes every now and then has a positive impact on a relationship.

I can’t imagine my life surrounded by serious people. I need humor. And so do you! Happy couples know the right time to be witty. And laughing even at the lamest jokes on earth can increase the level of love between the two of you.

8. They switch off their ringers.

Most of your time is spent at work. The other time is spent doing miscellaneous works, including eating and sleeping. So whatever leftover time you have, utilize it for each other. Stop browsing the internet, socializing in all respects, and simply hit the power button. Switch off your phones, and be connected with your partner face to face. You’ll love it!

9. They believe in PDA.

Happy couples enjoy PDA. No, it’s not a Personal Digital Assistant. It stands for Public Display of Affection. Walking while holding hands or just a random hug while waiting on the signals, a little kiss on the cheeks, or my personal favorite, acting strangers.

Sometimes, while waiting for the train, I will simply strike up a conversation with my partner as if I met him for the first time, and would continue doing that till we reach our destination. It brings enough entertainment to last for the day.

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10. They plan their futures together.

Planning your futures can take two forms. One, you sit down with calendars, calculators, and note pads. Two, you have a deep and meaningful conversations on future plans for your lives together. For example, happy couples have a custom of planning everything together, regardless of how trivial the matter is.

You two are a team, so work like a team. Make everything happen together, whether it is related to the children, you sex life, your career, or your plans for buying a house. Planning makes your bond stronger and enriches your journey together.

Do you know the definition of happy couple? It is: he does what she wants, and she does what she wants.

Just kidding! Happy couples never have the same character. And they have a good understanding of their differences. It doesn’t take a lot of effort; small gestures are enough to make you two live happily ever after!

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Last Updated on May 21, 2019

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

How to Communicate Effectively in Any Relationship

For all our social media bravado, we live in a society where communication is seen less as an art, and more as a perfunctory exercise. We spend so much time with people, yet we struggle with how to meaningfully communicate.

If you believe you have mastered effective communication, scan the list below and see whether you can see yourself in any of the examples:

Example 1

You are uncomfortable with a person’s actions or comments, and rather than telling the individual immediately, you sidestep the issue and attempt to move on as though the offending behavior or comment never happened.

You move on with the relationship and develop a pattern of not addressing challenging situations. Before long, the person with whom you are in relationship will say or do something that pushes you over the top and predictably, you explode or withdraw completely from the relationship.

In this example, hard-to-speak truths become never- expressed truths that turn into resentment and anger.

Example 2

You communicate from the head and without emotion. While what you communicate makes perfect sense to you, it comes across as cold because it lacks emotion.

People do not understand what motivates you to say what you say, and without sharing your feelings and emotions, others experience you as rude, cold or aggressive.

You will know this is a problem if people shy away from you, ignore your contributions in meetings or tell you your words hurt. You can also know you struggle in this area if you find yourself constantly apologizing for things you have said.

Example 3

You have an issue with one person, but you communicate your problem to an entirely different person.

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The person in whom you confide lacks the authority to resolve the matter troubling you, and while you have vented and expressed frustration, the underlying challenge is unresolved.

Example 4

You grew up in a family with destructive communication habits and those habits play out in your current relationships.

Because you have never stopped to ask why you communicate the way you do and whether your communication style still works, you may lack understanding of how your words impact others and how to implement positive change.

If you find yourself in any of the situations described above, this article is for you.

Communication can build or decimate worlds and it is important we get it right. Regardless of your professional aspirations or personal goals, you can improve your communication skills if you:

  • Understand your own communication style
  • Tailor your style depending on the needs of the audience
  • Communicate with precision and care
  • Be mindful of your delivery, timing and messenger

1. Understand Your Communication Style

To communicate effectively, you must understand the communication legacy passed down from our parents, grandparents or caregivers. Each of us grew up with spoken and unspoken rules about communication.

In some families, direct communication is practiced and honored. In other families, family members are encouraged to shy away from difficult conversations. Some families appreciate open and frank dialogue and others do not. Other families practice silence about substantive matters, that is, they seldom or rarely broach difficult conversations at all.

Before you can appreciate the nuance required in communication, it helps to know the familial patterns you grew up with.

2. Learn Others Communication Styles

Communicating effectively requires you to take a step back, assess the intended recipient of your communication and think through how the individual prefers to be communicated with. Once you know this, you can tailor your message in a way that increases the likelihood of being heard. This also prevents you from assuming the way you communicate with one group is appropriate or right for all groups or people.

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If you are unsure how to determine the styles of the groups or persons with whom you are interacting, you can always ask them:

“How do you prefer to receive information?”

This approach requires listening, both to what the individuals say as well as what is unspoken. Virgin Group CEO Richard Branson noted that the best communicators are also great listeners.

To communicate effectively from relationship to relationship and situation to situation, you must understand the communication needs of others.

3. Exercise Precision and Care

A recent engagement underscored for me the importance of exercising care when communicating.

On a recent trip to Ohio, I decided to meet up with an old friend to go for a walk. As we strolled through the soccer park, my friend gently announced that he had something to talk about, he was upset with me. His introduction to the problem allowed me to mentally shift gears and prepare for the conversation.

Shortly after introducing the shift in conversation, my friend asked me why I didn’t invite him to the launch party for my business. He lives in Ohio and I live in the D.C. area.

I explained that the event snuck up on me, and I only started planning the invite list three weeks before the event. Due to the last-minute nature of the gathering, I opted to invite people in the DMV area versus my friends from outside the area – I didn’t want to be disrespectful by asking them to travel on such short notice.

I also noted that I didn’t want to be disappointed if he and others declined to come to the event. So I played it safe in terms of inviting people who were local.

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In the moment, I felt the conversation went very well. I also checked in with my friend a few days after our walk, affirmed my appreciation for his willingness to communicate his upset and our ability to work through it.

The way this conversation unfolded exemplified effective communication. My friend approached me with grace and vulnerability. He approached me with a level of curiosity that didn’t put me on my heels — I was able to really listen to what he was saying, apologize for how my decision impacted him and vow that going forward, I would always ask rather than making decisions for him and others.

Our relationship is intact, and I now have information that will help me become a better friend to him and others.

4. Be Mindful of Delivery, Timing and Messenger

Communicating effectively also requires thinking through the delivery of the message one intends to communicate as well as the appropriate time for the discussion.

In an Entrepreneur.com column, VIP Contributor Deep Patel, noted that persons interested in communicating well need to master the art of timing. Patel noted,[1]

“Great comedians, like all great communicators, are able to feel out their audience to determine when to move on to a new topic or when to reiterate an idea.”

Communicating effectively also requires thoughtfulness about the messenger. A person prone to dramatic, angry outbursts should never be called upon to deliver constructive feedback, especially to people whom they do not know. The immediate aftermath of a mass shooting is not the ideal time to talk about the importance of the Second Amendment rights.

Like everyone else, I must work to ensure my communication is layered with precision and care.

It requires precision because words must be carefully tailored to the person with whom you are speaking.

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It requires intentionality because before one communicates, one should think about the audience and what the audience needs in order to hear your message the way you intended it to be communicated.

It requires active listening which is about hearing verbal and nonverbal messages.

Even though we may be right in what we say, how we say it could derail the impact of the message and the other parties’ ability to hear the message.

Communicating with care is also about saying things that the people in our life need to hear and doing so with love.

The Bottom Line

When I left the meeting with my dear friend, I wondered if I was replicating or modeling this level of openness and transparency in the rest of my relationships.

I was intrigued and appreciative. He’d clearly thought about what he wanted to say to me, picked the appropriate time to share his feedback and then delivered it with care. He hit the ball out of the park and I’m hopeful we all do the same.

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Featured photo credit: Kenan Buhic via unsplash.com

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