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Last Updated on February 27, 2018

Did You Know Millions Of Couples Have Come Out Stronger After Taking This Love Test

Did You Know Millions Of Couples Have Come Out Stronger After Taking This Love Test

Love isn’t always straight forward. Even when you seem to have found the perfect person for you, miscommunication and conflicting ways of expressing love can challenge any relationship.

Have you ever questioned whether your partner really loves you? Perhaps it annoys you that all they want is to be intimate yet never really tell you how they feel with words? Perhaps you go out of your way to find gifts to show you think about them but they seem unimpressed when they receive them? You may interpret them as being ungrateful but it could just be that they don’t value this as a particular sign of love.

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When it feels so right to be with someone but the flow of giving and receiving love seems difficult it could just be down to the mismatch of our love language.

What is Love Language?

Love languages are how we express and consider love in different ways. According to Gary Chapman, the author of the book “The 5 Love Languages”, there are 5 different love languages:

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  1. Words of Affirmation: This is when a person uses words more than anything else. They express love by articulating their feelings more than physical action like spending time with someone or giving gifts.
  2. Acts of Service: These are the people who believe actions speak louder than words. Showing someone love through an act is far more powerful than saying it to their face. This could come out in daily actions such as cooking their favourite dinner or running errands for them in order to show love.
  3. Receiving Gifts: Many think receiving gifts is a big sign of love. They feel it shows they’re thinking of someone, that they’ve gone out of their way to make them happy and brightened their day.
  4. Quality Time: Time is something we can’t get back so giving up your time to spend it with the one you love is one way of showing how much you love someone. For many it shows you’re making the other person a priority over anything else going on in your life at that moment.
  5. Physical Touch: Physical love is important in a relationship whether it’s sex, cuddling or holding hands. Many people see this as a strong way of expressing their love over words or any other actions.

You may agree with some of these ideas of showing love or strongly disagree and this is where the problem could lie. None of these are right or wrong but if you show love through telling someone on a regular basis, but your partner shows it more through physical touch, there’s a danger of interpreting these two languages as very different.

Take the Love Language Test to Find Out How You Communicate Love

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    Everyone can express love in a different way from their partner. We tend to express love to others how we want love to be expressed to us. If we then receive love in a different way, we can start to assume that they are not loving us to the same degree as we love them. This is when relationships can start breaking down.Instead we should take the time to understand each others’ love languages to be able to interpret the way we love and the different ways we are actually loved by others.

    Taking the love language assessment will give you insight into both you and your partner’s idea of expressing love. We’re all using different languages and the key is to interpret them correctly and translate them accordingly with no judgement.

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    The result will allow you both to understand each other and connect more fully in your relationship. But this doesn’t just apply to romantic love – our primary love language is most likely used in how we connect to friends and family.

    So make sure you take the love language assessment to find out which language you tend to use and value the most. Swap results with your loved ones and use it as a way to find out and understand how each of you show your love for each other.

    Featured photo credit: Stocksnap via stocksnap.io

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    The Gentle Art of Saying No

    The Gentle Art of Saying No

    No!

    It’s a simple fact that you can never be productive if you take on too many commitments — you simply spread yourself too thin and will not be able to get anything done, at least not well or on time.

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    But requests for your time are coming in all the time — through phone, email, IM or in person. To stay productive, and minimize stress, you have to learn the Gentle Art of Saying No — an art that many people have problems with.

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    What’s so hard about saying no? Well, to start with, it can hurt, anger or disappoint the person you’re saying “no” to, and that’s not usually a fun task. Second, if you hope to work with that person in the future, you’ll want to continue to have a good relationship with that person, and saying “no” in the wrong way can jeopardize that.

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    But it doesn’t have to be difficult or hard on your relationship. Here are the Top 10 tips for learning the Gentle Art of Saying No:

    1. Value your time. Know your commitments, and how valuable your precious time is. Then, when someone asks you to dedicate some of your time to a new commitment, you’ll know that you simply cannot do it. And tell them that: “I just can’t right now … my plate is overloaded as it is.”
    2. Know your priorities. Even if you do have some extra time (which for many of us is rare), is this new commitment really the way you want to spend that time? For myself, I know that more commitments means less time with my wife and kids, who are more important to me than anything.
    3. Practice saying no. Practice makes perfect. Saying “no” as often as you can is a great way to get better at it and more comfortable with saying the word. And sometimes, repeating the word is the only way to get a message through to extremely persistent people. When they keep insisting, just keep saying no. Eventually, they’ll get the message.
    4. Don’t apologize. A common way to start out is “I’m sorry but …” as people think that it sounds more polite. While politeness is important, apologizing just makes it sound weaker. You need to be firm, and unapologetic about guarding your time.
    5. Stop being nice. Again, it’s important to be polite, but being nice by saying yes all the time only hurts you. When you make it easy for people to grab your time (or money), they will continue to do it. But if you erect a wall, they will look for easier targets. Show them that your time is well guarded by being firm and turning down as many requests (that are not on your top priority list) as possible.
    6. Say no to your boss. Sometimes we feel that we have to say yes to our boss — they’re our boss, right? And if we say “no” then we look like we can’t handle the work — at least, that’s the common reasoning. But in fact, it’s the opposite — explain to your boss that by taking on too many commitments, you are weakening your productivity and jeopardizing your existing commitments. If your boss insists that you take on the project, go over your project or task list and ask him/her to re-prioritize, explaining that there’s only so much you can take on at one time.
    7. Pre-empting. It’s often much easier to pre-empt requests than to say “no” to them after the request has been made. If you know that requests are likely to be made, perhaps in a meeting, just say to everyone as soon as you come into the meeting, “Look guys, just to let you know, my week is booked full with some urgent projects and I won’t be able to take on any new requests.”
    8. Get back to you. Instead of providing an answer then and there, it’s often better to tell the person you’ll give their request some thought and get back to them. This will allow you to give it some consideration, and check your commitments and priorities. Then, if you can’t take on the request, simply tell them: “After giving this some thought, and checking my commitments, I won’t be able to accommodate the request at this time.” At least you gave it some consideration.
    9. Maybe later. If this is an option that you’d like to keep open, instead of just shutting the door on the person, it’s often better to just say, “This sounds like an interesting opportunity, but I just don’t have the time at the moment. Perhaps you could check back with me in [give a time frame].” Next time, when they check back with you, you might have some free time on your hands.
    10. It’s not you, it’s me. This classic dating rejection can work in other situations. Don’t be insincere about it, though. Often the person or project is a good one, but it’s just not right for you, at least not at this time. Simply say so — you can compliment the idea, the project, the person, the organization … but say that it’s not the right fit, or it’s not what you’re looking for at this time. Only say this if it’s true — people can sense insincerity.

    Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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