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Published on October 5, 2017

15 Uplifting Movies You Can Watch to Beat the Blues

15 Uplifting Movies You Can Watch to Beat the Blues

We all get into a slump once in a while. Maybe you were excited about a plan that fell through, or things have been stressful at work. Perhaps you took a risk and met rejection. Whatever the circumstances, you might feel completely unmotivated.

You can either wallow in your gloomy feelings, or you can work to make yourself feel better. I have a few go-to uplifting movies that I watch that always make me feel better.

The next time that you’re feeling down, watch a film from this list. You only need the energy to push “play” and these stories will work their magic on you. By the end of each one, you’ll be ready to leave the pity party and get back to doing the things that matter to you.

1. Sing Street

    Sing Street (2016) takes us to Dublin in the 1980s, during a time when music videos are changing the way that people listen to pop music. The teenage protagonist, Conor, deals with a tense family situation and issues at school. He meets a girl and decides to impress her by telling her he’s in a band. The only problem is, he doesn’t have a band, and he doesn’t know much about music.

    Conor’s story reminds us that we can make the best of a bad situation. Even though his home life and school were difficult, he boldly reshapes his future. He sets a vision, and he goes for it. Sing Street reminds us that when it comes to life, we can’t control everything, but we’re still in the driver’s seat.

    Sing Street will remind you that you can manifest a better reality.

    2. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off

      Ferris Bueller fakes sick to skip school, but his principal suspects that he’s playing hooky. Ferris, his best friend, and his girlfriend have a wild adventure as they avoid Principal Rooney.

      You’ll get a few laughs out of this film, but this classic has a deeper meaning. Ferris Bueller’s Day Off (1986) reminds us that if we don’t stop to enjoy life, it will pass us by.

      Be spontaneous, and watch Ferris Bueller’s Day Off.

      3. Little Miss Sunshine

        A dysfunctional family rallies around 7-year-old Olive, who has an opportunity to compete in the Little Miss Sunshine Pageant. They take a road trip from New Mexico to California to reach the pageant, and it seems like everything that can go wrong does go wrong.

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        Little Miss Sunshine (2006) will make you laugh while it addresses complicated personal issues. In spite of all the troubles that the family has along the way, they are determined to help Olive reach her goals. This film reminds us to hang on to our dreams and support one another, even when the chips are down.

        Let Little Miss Sunshine brighten to your day.

        4. School of Rock

          Dewey Finn is a loser living with former band member, Ned. Dewey is completely broke, and Ned is on the verge of throwing him out because he won’t pay his share of the rent. Dewey poses as Ned and takes a job as a substitute teacher at a stuffy private school. He teaches his students about rock music.

          School of Rock (2003) shows us that our passions always have a place in our lives. Dewey loves music more than anything. Even though his band didn’t work out for him in the beginning, his talent and dedication to his craft paved the way for opportunities and adventures he couldn’t have imagined.

          Watch School of Rock and rekindle your excitement about your unique talents.

          5. The 40-Year-Old Virgin

            Andy is a 40-year old nerd who has not lost his virginity. Even though he’s a nice guy, he’s just not had the opportunity to have sex, and as he gets older, being a virgin becomes more embarrassing for him. His friends attempt to help him meet a woman and lose his virginity, but the woman he falls for has other plans.

            The 40-Year Old Virgin (2005) is a good reminder that you don’t have to live your life the way that everyone else does. You have to find what’s right for you, and in the end, everything will be okay.

            The 40-Year Old Virgin lets you know that there’s nothing wrong with being unconventional.

            6. My Neighbour Totoro

              Two young girls and their father move into an old home to be closer to the girls’ mother, who is in the hospital. The sisters befriend spirits of the forest, who expose them to a beautiful supernatural world.

              The girls have moved to a new home because their mother is in dire straits, but they find comfort and friendship among the spirits of the forest, including Totoro. My Neighbor Totoro (1988) shows us that even in the most challenging situations, there are places to find joy and hope.

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              Remember that our bonds with others can help us overcome adversity when you watch My Neighbor Totoro.

              7. Babe

                Farmer Hogget wins the piglet, Babe, at the county fair. Babe befriends the other creatures on Hoggett’s farm and grows especially close to border collie, Fly. Babe learns a special skill set from Fly, which makes him the first pig of his kind.

                Babe was destined to be dinner, but his buoyant spirit and willingness to learn enable him to master a new skill. Babe (1995) shows us that it’s okay to be unique. Look for others who are willing to appreciate your dreams and help you grow, and you can achieve the impossible.

                March to the beat of your own drum with Babe.

                8. The Bucket List

                  Edward and Carter come from different backgrounds, but they are united by the common diagnosis of terminal cancer. The pair strike up an unlikely friendship as they set out to do all the things on their bucket list while they can.

                  When you watch The Bucket List (2007), think about what might be holding you back from the next great adventure. Every day above ground is a good day. Be open to trying new things to avoid stagnation.

                  Live life to the fullest when you watch The Bucket List.

                  9. Jumanji

                    Judy and Peter move into an old house with their aunt. They are learning to cope with the death of their mother, when they come upon a mysterious board game in the attic. The game turns their world upside down, and the only way to bring things back to normal is to finish the game.

                    Jumanji (1995) helps us remember the importance of finishing what we start. While you are unlikely to come upon a supernatural board game, you may be feeling gloomy because you haven’t been able to follow through on something that is important to you.

                    Play the Jumanji film when you need an adventure to break out of your slump.

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                    10. Amélie

                      Amélie leads a sheltered life that gives her a naive and sweet perspective on love. After she sees the way that kindness affects others, she dedicates herself to making a positive difference in the world.

                      Amélie learns that in order to help people and actualize her positive vision for the world, she has to stand up for what she believes in. Her kindness and sense of justice are strengths– not weaknesses. When you’re feeling down, Amélie (2001) can give you a fresh new outlook on the world.

                      Let Amélie remind you that life is beautiful.

                      11. Juno

                        When 16-year-old Juno gets pregnant, she decides to give the baby up for adoption. She meets the child’s prospective parents and strikes up an interesting relationship with them. Meanwhile, she grapples with her feelings about the baby’s father.

                        Juno (2007) shows us that even when life throws us a curve ball, we can still find a way to make things work. When you’re honest with yourself and commit to doing the right thing, you can find peace and love in challenging times.

                        Watch Juno to remember that sometimes doing the right thing isn’t always easy, but it’s always worthwhile.

                        12. The Boss Baby

                          Tim spent the first seven years of his life as an only child, but all that changed when a baby destined for management at BabyCorp is accidentally placed in his home. The baby takes over Tim’s household. Tim is jealous, but he has to join forces with his baby brother.

                          Boss Baby (2017) has a star-studded cast of voice actors, and it’s sure to provide some levity on a tough day. Tim has to learn to overcome his dislike for his brother to combat a common enemy. Sometimes emotions can affect your ability to get things done, but if you view a problem objectively you can push forward for the greater good.

                          Let The Boss Baby remind you that staying focused and working as a team will make you stronger.

                          13. The Darjeeling Limited

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                            Three brothers struggle to get along as they take a spiritual journey together after the passing of their father. As they make their trip, it becomes clear that they are all grappling with personal problems.

                            The Darjeeling Limited (2007) is quirky and funny, but it also has a dark side. The brothers learn that they must accept one another’s flaws and work together. This movie will remind you that everyone has a complex inner world that affects how they handle situations. If you’re feeling down because you’ve had a disagreement with someone, it might be worthwhile to think about why they hold a different perspective from you.

                            See what’s beneath the surface when you watch The Darjeeling Limited.

                            14. Rocky

                              When boxing nobody, Rocky Balboa, gets the chance to fight the champion, Apollo Creed, he knows that this is his opportunity to change his life. He must overcome his circumstances to train for his upcoming fight.

                              Rocky (1976) reminds us of the importance of doggedly pursuing our dreams. Even if it seems like you are facing something that’s nearly impossible to overcome, you don’t stand a chance unless you’re willing to step into the ring.

                              Watch Rocky when you need to have the eye of the tiger.

                              15. Step Up

                                Tyler hangs out with a bad crowd, and he gets caught vandalizing a performing arts school. His punishment consists of doing community service in the place that he vandalized. He gains a new respect for the arts and wants to become a student at the school, but he has to prove his worth first.

                                Step Up (2006) reminds us that we do not have to be defined by our circumstances. If you’re struggling because you feel like you came from the wrong side of the tracks, know that your dreams are still possible.

                                Watch Step Up when you need to break the mold.

                                When you’re feeling down, bust out the popcorn.

                                If you can’t bring yourself to do anything else, settle in to watch one of these uplifting movies. Each one can illuminate possibilities for you so that you can break out of your funk.

                                Save this list and refer back to it when you need to feel inspired.

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                                Brian Lee

                                Chief of Product Management at Lifehack

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                                Published on July 13, 2018

                                Striving Towards Secure Attachment: How to Restructure Your Thoughts

                                Striving Towards Secure Attachment: How to Restructure Your Thoughts

                                What if you could discover some tools and methods that could improve your relationships? What if by gaining a little knowledge you could understand your relationship dynamics better and give them a boost up?

                                By learning what secure attachment is and how to restructure your thoughts, you can become more self-aware of your relationship dynamics. After becoming more aware, you can then take a few steps to make them better than ever. That’s something that many of us could benefit from.

                                When we hear the term secure attachment, our mind typically goes to a relationship. And that’s exactly what it’s about.

                                In this article I’ll discuss the concept of secure attachments in more detail and how restructuring your thoughts can help you strive towards achieving better relationships.

                                Relationships are a hugely important part of our lives and whatever we can do to improve them is a good thing for everyone involved.

                                What is attachment theory?

                                Let’s do a quick overview of what attachment theory is. This will provide a good foundation for the rest of this article.

                                The esteemed psychologist John Bowlby first coined the term attachment theory in the late 60’s. Bowlby studied early childhood conditioning extensively and what he found was very interesting.

                                His research showed that when a very young child has a strong attachment to a caregiver, it provides the child with a sense of security and foundation. On the other hand when there isn’t a secure attachment, the child will expend a lot more developmental energy looking for security and stability.

                                The child without the secure attachment tends to become more fearful, timid and slow to explore new situations or their environment.

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                                When a strong attachment is developed in a child, he or she will be inclined to be more adventurous and seek out new experiences because they feel more secure. They know that whoever is watching out for them will be there if needed.

                                Bowlby’s colleague, Mary Ainsworth, took the theory further. She did extensive studies around infant-parent separations and provided a more formal framework for the differing attachment styles.

                                How attachment develops

                                Simply put, attachment is an emotional bond with another person. Attachment doesn’t have to go both ways, it can be one person feeling attached to another without it being reciprocated. Most of the time, it works between two people to one degree or another.

                                Attachment begins at a very young age. Over the history of time, when children were able to maintain a closer proximity to a caregiver that provided for them, a strong attachment was formed.

                                The initial thought was that the ability to provide food or nourishment to a child was the primary driver of a strong attachment.

                                It was then discovered that the primary drivers of attachment proved to be the parent/caregivers responsiveness to the child as well as the ability to nurture that child in a variety of ways. Things such as support, care, sustenance, and protection are all components of nurturing a child.

                                In essence a child forms a strong attachment when they feel that their caregiver is accessible and attentive and there if they need them; that the parent/caregiver will be there for them. If the child does not feel that the caregiver is there to help them when needed, they experience anxiety.

                                Different types of attachments

                                In children, 4 types of attachment styles have been identified. They are as follows:

                                • Secure attachment – This is primarily marked by discomfort or distress when separated from caregivers and joy and security when the caregiver is back around the child. Even though the child initially feels agitated when the caregiver is no longer around, they feel confident they will return. The return of the parent or caregiver is met with positive emotions, the child prefers parents to strangers.
                                • Ambivalent attachment – These children become very distressed when the parent or caregiver leaves. They feel they can’t rely on their caregiver for support when the need arises. Even though a child with ambivalent attachment may be agitated or confused when reunited with a parent or caregiver, they will cling to them.
                                • Avoidant attachment – These kids typically avoid parents or caregivers. When they have a choice of being with the parent or not, they don’t seem to care one way or the other. Research has shown that this may be the result of neglectful caregivers.
                                • Disorganized attachment – These children display a mix of disoriented behavior towards their caregiver. They may want them sometimes and other times they don’t. This is sometimes thought to be linked to inconsistent behavior from the parent or caregiver.

                                What attachments mean to adults

                                So the big question is how does this affect us in adulthood? Intuitively it makes sense that as a child, if we have someone who will be there when we need them, we feel secure. And on the other end of the spectrum, if we aren’t sure someone’s going to provide what we need when we need it, we may become more anxious and fearful.

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                                As an adult, we tend to wind up in one of three primary attachment types based on our childhood experiences. These are secure, avoidant, and anxious. Technically, there is a fourth one, anxious-avoidant, but it is quite a bit less common. They are described as follows:

                                • Secure – When you have a secure attachment, you are comfortable displaying interest and affection towards another person but you’re also fine being alone and independent. Secure types are less apt to obsess over a relationship gone sour and handle being rejected easier. Secure types also tend to be better than other types with not starting relationships with people that might not be the best partners. They cut off the relationship quicker when they see things in a potential partner they don’t like. Secure attachment people make up the majority of the attachment types.
                                • Anxious – Folks who have an anxious attachment style typically need a lot of reassurance from their partners. They have a much harder time being on their own and single than the other styles and fall into bad relationships more often. The anxious style represent about 20% of the population. It’s been shown that if anxious attachment styles learn how to communicate their needs better and learn to date secure partners, they can move towards the secure attachment style.
                                • Avoidant – Avoidant attachment style represents approximately 25% of the population as adults. Avoidants many times have the hardest time in a relationship because they have a difficult time finding satisfaction. In general, they are uncomfortable with close relationships and intimacy and are quite independent. They are the lone wolf type person.
                                • Anxious-avoidant – The anxious-avoidant style is relatively rare. It is composed of conflicting styles – they want to be close but at the same time push people away. They do things that push the people they are closest to away. Many times there can be a higher risk of depression or other mental health issues.

                                Here’s where it gets really interesting:

                                Move towards secure attachment

                                The good news is that it is possible to move from one style to another. Specifically, it is possible to move towards a more secure attachment style.

                                Now as you might imagine, this is not an easy or a quick process. Like any type of big change where you are attempting to alter such a deeply ingrained mindset, it takes a strong will to accomplish.

                                The first step is developing an awareness of your attachment style. The next step is to have the desire and drive to move your attachment style towards the more secure style.

                                If someone with an anxious or avoidant style has a long term relationship with a secure type, the anxious or avoidant person can slowly get brought up more towards a secure style.

                                The opposite is also true, they could bring the secure person more towards their attachment style. Therefore, you have to be conscious of your type and if you want to move more towards secure, it takes persistence.

                                Therapy is an option as well. Anxious types many times need to work on their self-esteem, avoidants on their connection specifically and compassion.

                                How to restructure your thoughts

                                Ready for the way to do it? Here we go:

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                                For the Avoidant Style

                                As with any type of change on such a deep level, the first step is awareness. Realize you have an avoidant style and be aware of it as you have interactions with your partner(s).

                                Try to work towards a place of mutual support and giving/taking. Try to lessen your need for complete self-reliance. Allow your partner to do some things that make you a little uncomfortable that you would normally do yourself.

                                Don’t always focus on the imperfections of your partner. We all have them, remind yourself of that.

                                Make yourself a list of the qualities that your partner has that you are thankful for.

                                Look for a secure style partner if at all possible, they would be good for you to be with.

                                If you have a tendency to end relationships before they go too far, be aware of that and let it develop further.

                                Get into the habit of accepting and even instigating physical touch. Tell yourself that it’s good for you to have some intimacy. Intimacy can help you feel safe and secure.

                                And over time you can realize that it’s okay to rely on other people.

                                For the Anxious Style

                                For the anxious style, the #1 thing to work on is learning to communicate needs better. This is a huge issue for the anxious style.

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                                First and foremost if you communicate your needs more clearly, you will have less anxiety, that’s already a big win. This will also allow you to better assess if a potential partner is good for you.

                                Try to bring your feelings more to the surface and most importantly, share them with your partner. Remember that secure attachments typically communicate pretty well, this is what you are working towards.

                                For the Anxious-Avoidant Style

                                The anxious-avoidant is a very small percentage of the attachment styles. Since this type tends to be anxious in the relationship AND more or less a loner, the key here is working hard to be very self-aware of your actions.

                                Use the parts of striving towards secure attachment from the anxious tips and the avoidant restructuring of your thoughts to consciously work towards being more secure.

                                When you find yourself pushing someone away, ask why. If you feel worried that your partner is going to leave you, again, ask yourself where this is coming from. Have they shown you any reason to believe this? Many times there is no real evidence. In that case, allow yourself to calm down and try not to obsess over it.

                                For the Secure Style

                                Since the goal is to move towards a more secure attachment style, there isn’t much needed here as you might imagine.

                                Something to be aware of is being in a relationship just because it’s “okay”. Don’t stay if it’s not a good place for you and your partner. If your partner is of an anxious or avoidant attachment style, stay mindful to not start developing characteristics of those styles.

                                Strive towards Secure Attachment

                                As we wrap things up, you’ve probably developed a good idea of the benefits of secure attachment. If you don’t currently have a secure attachment style, here are some benefits of restructuring your thoughts more towards this style:

                                • Positive self esteem and self image
                                • Close and well adjusted relationships
                                • Sense of security in self and the world
                                • Ability to be independent as well as in relationships
                                • Optimistic outlook on life and yourself
                                • Strong coping skills and strategies for relationships and life
                                • Trust in self and others
                                • Close, intimate relationships
                                • Strong determination and problem solving skills

                                If you are an anxious or avoidant style or the combination of anxious-avoidant, it is possible to move towards a secure attachment style.

                                It takes self-awareness, patience and a strong desire to get close to being secure but it can be done. You will find that putting the effort into it will provide you with more open, honest and satisfying relationships.

                                Featured photo credit: Pexels via pexels.com

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