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Long Distance Love Birds! This Is How Your Screen Help You Stay Sweet Across the Sea!

Long Distance Love Birds! This Is How Your Screen Help You Stay Sweet Across the Sea!

Relationships can be hard to maintain especially once it gets to the stage where you both get comfortable. Standards may slip or you both could start taking each other for granted. While this can be fixed in a conventional relationship, for those in long distance relationships, this could threaten the union all the more.

Long Distance Relationship Equals to Dead-End Street?

Long distance relationships usually have a bad rep. If you’re in one right now, I’m sure many people have given you their widely-agreed-upon opinion that it just won’t last. While a lot of distance relationships don’t tend to work out for a myriad of reasons – namely that both people must be on the same page and committed to each other – many do stand the test of time because both are willing to use the distance well.

As mentioned before, that comfortable stage in a relationship can creep up on you but easily identified and sorted out. However, for a long distance relationship it can be the beginning of the end if couples can’t devote time and creativity to spice things up.

Stay Connected, That’s the Bullseye You Gonna Hit

The key to a successful relationship is the sense of connection you have with one another. Couples create this by sharing experiences, creating memories and building emotional bonds but if you’re physically apart then this can be harder to maintain.

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But the good news is there are ways you can recreate this connection even if you live hundreds of miles away. It’s all about spending your lives together despite physical distance and making effort to communicate in order to spice things up. So try these out to help you feel closer to your partner and keep that connection alive and well.

1. Let Skype Help You Date

When you can’t speak to each other face-to-face, the next best option is to Skype. While this is a brilliant way to keep the communication open, Skyping too often can cause the relationship to go stale which is why setting up occasional date nights can create a sense of, well, being on a date together!

Set certain days and times to catch up with your other half and treat it like a date. Try not to chat about mundane things too much but make the effort to catch up with each other emotionally. Set up a dinner and a glass of wine so it feels like you’re sharing a meal together. Dress up and make yourself look nice – if you treat this like a special date then you’ll both get much more out of it.

2. We Can Laugh At the Same Movie Scenes!

Everyone loves watching a movie with their loved one. While you can’t exactly cuddle up together on the sofa, the next best thing is to both put on the movie at the same time while either talking on the phone or texting each other. Knowing you’re both experiencing the same movie at the same time can bring a certain connection. You can express your thoughts about the film or laugh at the same scenes. It’s all about creating the feeling and experience of being together.

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3. Go Surprise My Love, Packages!

Sending something to your loved one far away shows you really care and even better if it’s a surprise. It shows you’re thinking of them and strengthens that emotional connection and bond. So why not get food delivered from their favourite local restaurant? Or send them a care package full of their favourite snacks or mementos of your time spent together? If it’s something they’ve mentioned before in passing – something they perhaps miss – throw it in there. This will, again, show you’re thinking about them and putting in that extra effort.

4. Let TV Shows Wire the Two Little Hearts

Don’t you love discussing the latest episode of Game of Thrones or Orange is the New Black? If you have a favourite TV series you both love or decide to start a brand new one, then carve out some time to watch it separately and then chat about it, or as with the movie suggestion, watch it at the same time. This can open more lines of discussion which is important to stop communication getting stale. Having things in common will help you both recognise your connection.

5. Couple App Presents: Your Secret Garden

While texting and calling is great, it’s not always that private. Creating the sense of privacy that you get with a traditional relationship is important psychologically and this can be maintained with the Couple app which allows you to create a space to keep all your interactions in one place. This app builds a private timeline of all your special moments whether it’s video calls, pictures, real-time games as well as other cool features just for the two of you to share.

This is aimed at creating something only the two of you can see and experience together making your relationship feel more special.

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6. Fitness Competition and Who Will Be the Winner?

If you’re both competitive and sporty or just wanting to set some health goals, making a competition out of it can be fun. But the best thing about this is that it’s a long-term project which can be helped along by the motivation you give to each other. This in itself can help you with the mindset that you’re sharing life goals and seeing them through together.

Why not make the next time you see each other your results day? This will give you more determination and motivation to share your hard work with each other.

7. It’s Adventure Time!

It can suck not being able to go out and do things together but in an age where internet is so accessible, now is the best time to spice up a long distance relationship. If you want to go out exploring then you can easily bring your partner with you through the power of social media. Whether it’s Skype, FaceTime, Facebook live, Instagram live or Snapchat, you can record a constant stream of your adventures. So next time you go hiking or exploring a city take your loved one with you, experience it together and bring a sense of closeness to the relationship.

8. A Journal of This Long Love-Journey

Sometimes being in a long distance relationship can force you to find things that connects you spiritually – something that can be pushed to the wayside in a conventional relationship. Journaling is a really good reflection tool and you can make this a great way to strengthen that connection for both of you as well as personally.

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Each of you take it in turn to record your life every other day. When you get together you’ll have a really great account of your separate lives coming together and see how they intertwine too. Reading over this will show you that even though you may be physically apart, you are spiritually together.

9. Let’s Have a Throw-Back Thursday, Darling

Put aside a certain day of the week where you devote some time recalling special memories you’ve shared together. Reminding yourselves of the reasons why you’ve chosen each other as that special person is really important and often lost once you live apart. It’s all about keeping it alive in our minds which will prevent that feeling of distance from creeping in – a problem that is often the cause of long distance break ups.

10. Find Your Honey – You Are the Real Surprise!

One of the best things you can do especially if you’re in a trusted and committed relationship, is to arrange a surprise visit. Check with friends and family about their schedules and turn up unannounced. Knowing you made that effort and getting to see you will strengthen your relationship all the more.

Long distance relationships don’t have to be as hard as people say they are. It requires a lot of effort and imagination to keep a relationship fresh when there’s no physical connection but try out these suggestions and make your relationship stronger despite the miles between you.

More by this author

Jenny Marchal

A passionate writer who loves sharing about positive psychology.

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Last Updated on February 11, 2021

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

Easily Misunderstood by Others? 6 Barriers You Should Overcome to Make Communication Less Frustrating

How often have you said something simple, only to have the person who you said this to misunderstand it or twist the meaning completely around? Nodding your head in affirmative? Then this means that you are being unclear in your communication.

Communication should be simple, right? It’s all about two people or more talking and explaining something to the other. The problem lies in the talking itself, somehow we end up being unclear, and our words, attitude or even the way of talking becomes a barrier in communication, most of the times unknowingly. We give you six common barriers to communication, and how to get past them; for you to actually say what you mean, and or the other person to understand it as well…

The 6 Walls You Need to Break Down to Make Communication Effective

Think about it this way, a simple phrase like “what do you mean” can be said in many different ways and each different way would end up “communicating” something else entirely. Scream it at the other person, and the perception would be anger. Whisper this is someone’s ear and others may take it as if you were plotting something. Say it in another language, and no one gets what you mean at all, if they don’t speak it… This is what we mean when we say that talking or saying something that’s clear in your head, many not mean that you have successfully communicated it across to your intended audience – thus what you say and how, where and why you said it – at times become barriers to communication.[1]

Perceptual Barrier

The moment you say something in a confrontational, sarcastic, angry or emotional tone, you have set up perceptual barriers to communication. The other person or people to whom you are trying to communicate your point get the message that you are disinterested in what you are saying and sort of turn a deaf ear. In effect, you are yelling your point across to person who might as well be deaf![2]

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The problem: When you have a tone that’s not particularly positive, a body language that denotes your own disinterest in the situation and let your own stereotypes and misgivings enter the conversation via the way you talk and gesture, the other person perceives what you saying an entirely different manner than say if you said the same while smiling and catching their gaze.

The solution: Start the conversation on a positive note, and don’t let what you think color your tone, gestures of body language. Maintain eye contact with your audience, and smile openly and wholeheartedly…

Attitudinal Barrier

Some people, if you would excuse the language, are simply badass and in general are unable to form relationships or even a common point of communication with others, due to their habit of thinking to highly or too lowly of them. They basically have an attitude problem – since they hold themselves in high esteem, they are unable to form genuine lines of communication with anyone. The same is true if they think too little of themselves as well.[3]

The problem: If anyone at work, or even in your family, tends to roam around with a superior air – anything they say is likely to be taken by you and the others with a pinch, or even a bag of salt. Simply because whenever they talk, the first thing to come out of it is their condescending attitude. And in case there’s someone with an inferiority complex, their incessant self-pity forms barriers to communication.

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The solution: Use simple words and an encouraging smile to communicate effectively – and stick to constructive criticism, and not criticism because you are a perfectionist. If you see someone doing a good job, let them know, and disregard the thought that you could have done it better. It’s their job so measure them by industry standards and not your own.

Language Barrier

This is perhaps the commonest and the most inadvertent of barriers to communication. Using big words, too much of technical jargon or even using just the wrong language at the incorrect or inopportune time can lead to a loss or misinterpretation of communication. It may have sounded right in your head and to your ears as well, but if sounded gobbledygook to the others, the purpose is lost.

The problem: Say you are trying to explain a process to the newbies and end up using every technical word and industry jargon that you knew – your communication has failed if the newbie understood zilch. You have to, without sounding patronizing, explain things to someone in the simplest language they understand instead of the most complex that you do.

The solution: Simplify things for the other person to understand you, and understand it well. Think about it this way: if you are trying to explain something scientific to a child, you tone it down to their thinking capacity, without “dumbing” anything down in the process.[4]

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Emotional Barrier

Sometimes, we hesitate in opening our mouths, for fear of putting our foot in it! Other times, our emotional state is so fragile that we keep it and our lips zipped tightly together lest we explode. This is the time that our emotions become barriers to communication.[5]

The problem: Say you had a fight at home and are on a slow boil, muttering, in your head, about the injustice of it all. At this time, you have to give someone a dressing down over their work performance. You are likely to transfer at least part of your angst to the conversation then, and talk about unfairness in general, leaving the other person stymied about what you actually meant!

The solution: Remove your emotions and feelings to a personal space, and talk to the other person as you normally would. Treat any phobias or fears that you have and nip them in the bud so that they don’t become a problem. And remember, no one is perfect.

Cultural Barrier

Sometimes, being in an ever-shrinking world means that inadvertently, rules can make cultures clash and cultural clashes can turn into barriers to communication. The idea is to make your point across without hurting anyone’s cultural or religious sentiments.

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The problem: There are so many ways culture clashes can happen during communication and with cultural clashes; it’s not always about ethnicity. A non-smoker may have problems with smokers taking breaks; an older boss may have issues with younger staff using the Internet too much.

The solution: Communicate only what is necessary to get the point across – and eave your personal sentiments or feelings out of it. Try to be accommodative of the other’s viewpoint, and in case you still need to work it out, do it one to one, to avoid making a spectacle of the other person’s beliefs.[6]

Gender Barrier

Finally, it’s about Men from Mars and Women from Venus. Sometimes, men don’t understand women and women don’t get men – and this gender gap throws barriers in communication. Women tend to take conflict to their graves, literally, while men can move on instantly. Women rely on intuition, men on logic – so inherently, gender becomes a big block in successful communication.[7]

The problem: A male boss may inadvertently rub his female subordinates the wrong way with anti-feminism innuendoes, or even have problems with women taking too many family leaves. Similarly, women sometimes let their emotions get the better of them, something a male audience can’t relate to.

The solution: Talk to people like people – don’t think or classify them into genders and then talk accordingly. Don’t make comments or innuendos that are gender biased – you don’t have to come across as an MCP or as a bra-burning feminist either. Keep gender out of it.

And remember, the key to successful communication is simply being open, making eye contact and smiling intermittently. The battle is usually half won when you say what you mean in simple, straightforward words and keep your emotions out of it.

Reference

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