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Are You Satisfied with Your Relationship or Settling for Less? Take This Test to Find Out

Are You Satisfied with Your Relationship or Settling for Less? Take This Test to Find Out

Have you ever wanted a relationship to work so badly that you ignore all of the signs of its inevitable decline? Don’t feel bad. While it may seem completely evident to an outsider what they would do in your situation, it’s a totally different situation for the person living it. But since you’re here, you’re probably feeling to need to take a step back and get some perspective on your relationship. That’s good!

Try taking the test below and find out your relationship score:

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Grims Questionnaire Of Relationship Satisfaction

Apart from the test, a little soul searching is important in determining whether you are where you need to be in life and what you can do to improve.

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Why Do People Settle For Less?

Why would someone settle for someone who doesn’t match who they were looking for in the first place? Well, before continuing, it’s important to note that you’ll NEVER find someone who meets your idyllic image of your perfect partner to the letter.

That being said, you should be happy with the one you’re with. Many people, however, admit that they are indeed settling for a relationship that doesn’t make them truly happy.[1] There are many reasons people find themselves in this predicament.

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Here are some examples:

  • They’re afraid of being alone. They may feel afraid because they’ve never learned to be on their own, or they may be afraid that they’ll never find anyone else. This is particularly true of people as they get older. One research study recently found that being single was one of the biggest reasons people settle for a less fulfilling relationship.[2]
  • They don’t believe they deserve to be happy. This is harder to detect and has to do with self-esteem. If someone doesn’t feel they deserve joy in their life, they may find it difficult to let go of something that’s doing them more harm than good.
  • They feel guilty about hurting the other person. This one is hard, especially if the two people really do love each other. Sometimes, even two people are in love, they still just aren’t right for one another.
  • They fear losing financial security. This is particularly true if one person is working and the other isn’t. The prospect of losing the security provided by a partner can be frightening, to say the least, if a person has been relying on it for any length of time.
  • They have children. Everything gets more complicated with kids in the mix. People know that if they separate after having kids, it affects them too.

Signs You May Be Settling For Less

  • You consistently feel like the relationship is hindering you or bringing you down. It may feel like it’s an emotional and physical barrier to everything you wish to be or achieve in life.
  • You feel like you can’t be your best with your partner. It’s true that relationships can bring out the best and the worst in people. Hopefully, if the relationship is positive, the rough edges will be smoothed out and you’ll actually grow as a person. If you don’t like who you are when you’re with your partner and nothing you do seems to help, then you may need to move on.
  • You’ve been cheated on one or more times. You’d think this one is obvious, but some people are just more understanding than others. If you’re one of those people, and your partner has cheated on you or betrayed you in some other way several times, you’re definitely settling for less than you deserve.
  • You find yourself feeling apprehensive at the thought of forever with you partner. You should feel excited, glad, and grateful. If you don’t, they may not be the one for you.

There are many other signs you may be settling. If you feel like maybe you are,

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Featured photo credit: Greece via pixabay.com

Reference

[1] Opra.com: Why Do You Settle For Less?
[2] Journal of Personality and Social Psychology: Settling for less out of fear of being single.

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Marina Richter

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on September 17, 2019

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

10 Simple Ways To Always Think Positive Thoughts

Positive thinking can lead to a lot of positive change in your life. Developing an optimistic outlook can be good for both your physical and mental health.

But sometimes, certain situations arise in life that makes it hard to keep a positive outlook. Take steps to make positive thinking become more like your second nature and you’ll reap the biggest benefits.

Here are 10 ways to make thinking positive thoughts easy:

1. Spend Time with Positive People

If you surround yourself with constant complainers, their negativity is likely to rub off on you.

Spend time with positive friends and family members to increase the likelihood that their positive thinking habits will become yours too. It’s hard to be negative when everyone around you is so positive.

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2. Take Responsibility for Your Behavior

When you encounter problems and difficulties in life, don’t play the role of the victim. Acknowledge your role in the situation and take responsibility for your behavior.

Accepting responsibility can help you learn from mistakes and prevent you from blaming others unfairly.

3. Contribute to the Community

One of the best ways to feel good about what you have, is to focus on what you have to give.

Volunteer in some manner and give back to the community. Helping others can give you a new outlook on the world and can assist you with positive thinking.

4. Read Positive and Inspirational Materials

Spend time each day reading something that encourages positive thinking. Read the Bible, spiritual material, or inspirational quotes to help you focus on what’s important to you in life. It can be a great way to start and end your day.

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Some recommendations for you:

5. Recognize and Replace Negative Thoughts

You won’t be successful at positive thinking if you’re still plagued by frequent negative thoughts. Learn to recognize and replace thoughts that are overly negative. Often, thoughts that include words like “always” and “never” signal that they aren’t true.

If you find yourself thinking something such as, “I always mess everything up,” replace it with something more realistic such as, “Sometimes I make mistakes but I learn from them.”

There’s no need to make your thoughts unrealistically positive, but instead, make them more realistic.

6. Establish and Work Toward Goals

It’s easier to be positive about problems and setbacks when you have goals that you’re working toward. Goals will give you motivation to overcome those obstacles when you encounter problems along the way. Without clear goals, it’s harder to make decisions and gauge your progress.

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Learn to set SMART goals to help you achieve more.

7. Consider the Consequences of Negativity

Spend some time thinking about the consequences of negative thinking. Often, it can become a self-fulfilling prophecy.

For example, a person who thinks, “I probably won’t get this job interview,” may put less effort into the interview. As a result, he may decrease his chances of getting the job.

Create a list of all the ways negative thinking impacts your life. It likely influences your behavior, your relationships, and your feelings. Then, create a list of the ways in which positive thinking could be beneficial.

8. Offer Compliments to Others

Look for reasons to compliment others. Be genuine in your praise and compliments, but offer it frequently. This will help you look for the good in other people.

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9. Create a Daily Gratitude List

If you start keeping a daily gratitude list, you’ll start noticing exactly how much you have to be thankful for. This can help you focus on the positive in your life instead of thinking about all the bad things that have happened in the day.

Getting in the habit of showing an attitude of gratitude makes positive thinking more of a habit. Here’re 40 Simple Ways To Practice Gratitude.

10. Practice Self-Care

Take good care of yourself and you’ll be more equipped to think positively.

Get plenty of rest and exercise and practice managing your stress well. Taking care of your physical and mental health will provide you with more energy to focus on positive thinking.

Learn about these 30 Self-Care Habits for a Strong and Healthy Mind, Body and Spirit.

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Featured photo credit: DESIGNECOLOGIST via unsplash.com

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