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What Is Love? Love Is When The Person Can Drive You Crazy But You Still Want To Be With Him/Her

What Is Love? Love Is When The Person Can Drive You Crazy But You Still Want To Be With Him/Her

That timeless question “what is love?” has resurfaced over and over again for centuries. We sing about it, we write about it, we cry and laugh about it. So what is it? Is love that that tingly excited feeling you get when you start a new relationship? Is it the feeling you get on your way to the alter? Is it looking at your partner at 90 years old and realizing there’s no one you would have rather spent your life with? All of the above? All of these things are a part of love but there’s one aspect of this powerful emotion that we forget about.

Losing the magic

We’re all familiar with the stages of a relationship. In that first, magical stage, our partner can do no wrong. You could even say they walk on water, and you probably seem the same way to them. As you become closer and become a unit, you may start to notice that their actions and emotions have a profound effect on you. You’re sad when they are sad, and happy when they laugh. The third stage is one that many relationships don’t make it past. In this stage, the mystery and excitement has evaporated to such a degree that the behavior you once found cute may just annoy you. And, they probably feel the same! If you two can make it past this stage, it will only get better!

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Why You Drive Each Other Crazy

You get on each other’s nerves. He doesn’t put away the dishes right, and she steals the blankets at night. You’re both learning that the other is human! Do you like everything about yourself? Probably not. So, if you and your partner are truly to become one unit, then you’re going to find things about them that you don’t like.

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How to Know if the Relationship is Still Worth the Effort

Many couples fall out when one or both of the participants wonder if they’re right for one another. This is a critical juncture in a relationship because this is where the soul searching begins. It doesn’t need to be that hard. Think about what your partner does that annoys you, and think about the things you might do that are irritating or upsetting. Then think about the things you’d miss if they were to disappear tomorrow. You’ll probably start remembering all of the things that made you fall in love in the first place.

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How to Make it Better

Now it’s time for some effort on both sides. There are many ways to rekindle your fading interests and make your relationship better than it was, even when you first met.

  1. Talk to your partner. Communication is KEY. If you and your partner can’t communicate about things that bother you then you won’t last long. Let them know when they do something that bothers you but don’t limit communication to criticism. Tell them every day that you love them, and tell them why you’re grateful to have them around. Confide in them as you would your best friend. Don’t shut them out.
  2. Use humor. Romantic comedies are funny for a reason. Try looking at your relationship like it’s a comedy sometimes. The things you do and say to one another, and the things that drive you nuts may just take on a different light. Laugh with your partner about the dumb stuff you both do and say. Laughter will enrich your relationship more than anything else.
  3. Take a step back when you’re upset. Most arguments are based on a misunderstanding and can be easily remedied if both parties take a breather before talking about it. Apologies and understanding both come easier if you allow one another this important space.

So what is love? Love is when you and your partner drive one another up the wall, but you can still laugh about it. It’s when the mystery is gone, but you can still appreciate all of the wonderful things about them that make smile. Love is when you look into their eyes, and you realize they’re the one you want by your side in eighty years laughing with you, bugging you, and sitting quietly with you. No one else will do.

Bright Side: There are five stages of love, but many people get stuck at the third

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Marina Richter

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on October 16, 2019

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

5 Powerful Ways for Building Fulfilling Relationships

We all have relationships. We have acquaintances, relatives, colleagues, neighbors and friends. However, for a large percentage of us, many of these relationships are not fulfilling.

They are unfulfilling because they lack real strength; and they lack real strength because they lack real depth.

Unfortunately, in today’s society, we tend to have shallow, superficial relationships with others, and it’s extremely hard for this kind of relationships to provide anything more than faint satisfaction.

I’d like to show you, based on my experience as a communication and confidence coach, how you can add a significant amount of depth, and thus strength, to your relationships and make your social life a whole lot more meaningful.

Here’re 5 simple yet powerful ways for meaningful relationships building:

1. Meet More People

This is an apparent paradox, but the quality of the people you meet has considerably to do with the quantity of people you meet.

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If you don’t know a lot of people and you barely meet one or two new people every season of the year, considering the variety of individuals out there, you won’t meet very often people who are a good match with you in terms of personality, interests and values.

And since this natural match plays a huge part in building strong relationships, you’ll just as seldom have the opportunity to develop strong relationships.

Conversely, if you go out a lot, you meet a lot of new people and you constantly expand your social circle, you’re much more likely to meet people you match up well with, and these people have a tremendous potential to become good friends, reliable partners, etc.

This is why it’s important to meet more people.

2. Talk about the Things That Matter To You

A relationship becomes the strongest when two people discover they believe in the same things and have similar interests. It’s these commonalities regarding values and interests that create the strongest emotional connection.

I’ve noticed that many people keep conversations shallow. They talk about trivial stuff such as the weather, what’s on TV, the lives of various movie stars, but they rarely talk about what really matters to them in life. This is a mistake from my perspective, because it’s the perfect method for a relationship to not develop.

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Talk about the things that truly matter to you and give others a chance to know what you care about and what you believe in. If they believe in the same things and they care about the same things, they’ll eagerly let you know. Thus you’ll find meaningful common ground and you’ll feel more connected.

3. Express Vulnerability

Many people try to come off as perfect. They don’t talk about their failures, they hide their shortcomings and they never say anything that could embarrass them.

This is all just a facade though. You may appear perfect to some, but you know you’re not perfect and they know that too. You’re only human and humans have flaws.

However, by hiding your flaws, what you do succeed in is appearing cold and impersonal. You seem like a marble statue rather than a real person. And this makes it very hard for anyone to connect with you emotionally.

Humans connect with other humans, not with ideals. Keep this in mind and don’t be afraid to let your vulnerability and your humanity show. This is what takes a relationship to the next level.

Take a look at this article and find out Why Showing Vulnerability Actually Proves Your Strength.

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4. Have Integrity

Integrity, as I see it, is the alignment between your thoughts, your words and your actions. When you say what you think and you do what you said you’ll do, you have integrity.

This is a crucial trait because if you have integrity, people can trust you. They can trust you to give them an honest feedback, even when it’s hard to shallow, and they can trust you to keep your promises.

This trust is one of the central pillars of a strong relationship, both in your personal and your professional life. So, as challenging as it can be sometimes, always try to have integrity.

Be honest with the people around you, even when this will initially hurt them. It’s more important for them to trust you than to not feel hurt. And always do what you promised. Even better, think twice before you promise anything, and only promise what you really can and you are willing to do.

5. Be There for Others

Another central pillar of strong relationships is support. Connections between people grow sturdy if they can rely on each other for support when it’s needed, whether that support means a few kind words or several massive actions.

Of course, you can’t be there for everybody, all the time. Your time, energy and other resources are limited. But what you can do is identify the genuinely important people in your life and then seek to be there as much as possible, at least for them.

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Your support will help them practically, and it will comfort them emotionally; which makes one hell of a difference in a relationship.

The Bottom Line

With the right mindset and the right behavior, you can strengthen a wide range of relationships in your life and advance them as far as they can be advanced.

And with strong relationships, not only that you feel more fulfilled, but you feel more connected to the entire world. You feel that your life has real value, you have more fun and you live in the moment. An entire world of opportunities opens up in front of you.

Then your task is to simply walk through the open doors.

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Featured photo credit: Proxyclick Visitor Management System via unsplash.com

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