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Be the Man You Want to Be and Attract a Great Lady in 2017

Be the Man You Want to Be and Attract a Great Lady in 2017

If you’re a guy who has been stuck single, try making this the year that you be the man you want to be and attract a great lady in 2017. Starting the year with quality movie-messages can be a great way to expand our ambitions while jolting us back on the track to our dreams. Here are 10 impactful movie clips, with messages and action steps to help you be the man you want to be in 2017.

1. Money Ball

Great leaders consciously choose priorities and principles to direct and guide their lives. They follow them despite the unconventional path it may take them on.


Action Step: What are 3 priorities or principles that would guide you to be the man you want to be? Write them down and reflect on how you can shape your life to be more in line with these values.

2. Selma

Once you’ve chosen your priorities and values, find a role model who has had the courage to live his life according to his values and principles no matter how hard it may have been.

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Action step: Do you have an inspiring role model who has chosen to stick to his or her principles no matter what? Find a picture or quote from this person and put it somewhere in clear view as a reminder for you to stay true to your values.

3. Coach Carter

Live your life for a meaningful purpose that is beyond yourself and practice loyalty toward your true friends in the process.


Action step: Who are the people who support and encourage you to be your best self? Make an effort to be with these people and to support them, too.

4. Eddie the Eagle

With your purpose in mind, set goals and dreams. Then don’t give up on them.

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Action step: If you haven’t already, set some goals, create a plan to see them through and do your best to follow it. Most importantly, if you aren’t perfect with following through on your plan, don’t let that stop you or become an excuse for you to give up completely.

5. Yes Man

Keep your mind and heart open to life and be ready to step up to help a brother (or sister) out with whatever may come up.


Action step: Take an opportunity to do something kind for someone each week without expecting anything in return.

6. October Sky

Live your own life, but don’t forget to show your ‘pops’ some heartfelt love and appreciation even if you disagree on some things.

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Action step: If your mom or dad is still around, write down 3 things you can appreciate about him or her. Feel the appreciation for this person and have a visit with them. Allow your gratitude for this person to come through in your words and presence.

7. Good Will Hunting

Knowledge is not the same thing as wisdom and arrogance is a poor cover up for lack of confidence.


Action step: Set aside some time this week, this month, and this year to take those steps that will help you be the man you want to be. Turn one or two of these actions into habits that will shape your character.

8. Love Actually

If you happen to find a great partner to spend your life with, cherish her and treat her right. Sometimes short-term pleasures are the enemies of lasting joy.

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Action step: If you haven’t already, realize the great pain that infidelity can cause, make a decision not to do it and stick to your decision.

9. Interstellar

Make room for mystery and awe. Love transcends time and space whether we understand how or not.


Action step: Create space for opportunities to experience more wonder and awe this year be it looking up at the stars, watching storms, learning how to meditate or simply choosing to enjoy more ordinary moments.

10. Van Wilder

“Don’t take life too seriously…you’ll never get out alive.” – From Van Wilder. This one might not seem to fit with the rest, but it is riddled with funny (warning: sometimes crude) pieces of advice with a few gems thrown into the mix.


Action step: Was there a time in your life where you found it easy to laugh or where you just seemed to have a great time? What could you do more of to bring that side of yourself out?

Please leave a comment below with the movies or scenes that have inspired or impacted you to be the man you want to be!

Featured photo credit: Clem Onojeghuo via unsplash.com

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Chad Wotherspoon

I help good, single men authentically set up dates with the right types of women

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

The Best Way to Create a Vision for the Life You Want

Creating a vision for your life might seem like a frivolous, fantastical waste of time, but it’s not: creating a compelling vision of the life you want is actually one of the most effective strategies for achieving the life of your dreams. Perhaps the best way to look at the concept of a life vision is as a compass to help guide you to take the best actions and make the right choices that help propel you toward your best life.

your vision of where or who you want to be is the greatest asset you have

    Why You Need a Vision

    Experts and life success stories support the idea that with a vision in mind, you are more likely to succeed far beyond what you could otherwise achieve without a clear vision. Think of crafting your life vision as mapping a path to your personal and professional dreams. Life satisfaction and personal happiness are within reach. The harsh reality is that if you don’t develop your own vision, you’ll allow other people and circumstances to direct the course of your life.

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    How to Create Your Life Vision

    Don’t expect a clear and well-defined vision overnight—envisioning your life and determining the course you will follow requires time, and reflection. You need to cultivate vision and perspective, and you also need to apply logic and planning for the practical application of your vision. Your best vision blossoms from your dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It will resonate with your values and ideals, and will generate energy and enthusiasm to help strengthen your commitment to explore the possibilities of your life.

    What Do You Want?

    The question sounds deceptively simple, but it’s often the most difficult to answer. Allowing yourself to explore your deepest desires can be very frightening. You may also not think you have the time to consider something as fanciful as what you want out of life, but it’s important to remind yourself that a life of fulfillment does not usually happen by chance, but by design.

    It’s helpful to ask some thought-provoking questions to help you discover the possibilities of what you want out of life. Consider every aspect of your life, personal and professional, tangible and intangible. Contemplate all the important areas, family and friends, career and success, health and quality of life, spiritual connection and personal growth, and don’t forget about fun and enjoyment.

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    Some tips to guide you:

    • Remember to ask why you want certain things
    • Think about what you want, not on what you don’t want.
    • Give yourself permission to dream.
    • Be creative. Consider ideas that you never thought possible.
    • Focus on your wishes, not what others expect of you.

    Some questions to start your exploration:

    • What really matters to you in life? Not what should matter, what does matter.
    • What would you like to have more of in your life?
    • Set aside money for a moment; what do you want in your career?
    • What are your secret passions and dreams?
    • What would bring more joy and happiness into your life?
    • What do you want your relationships to be like?
    • What qualities would you like to develop?
    • What are your values? What issues do you care about?
    • What are your talents? What’s special about you?
    • What would you most like to accomplish?
    • What would legacy would you like to leave behind?

    It may be helpful to write your thoughts down in a journal or creative vision board if you’re the creative type. Add your own questions, and ask others what they want out of life. Relax and make this exercise fun. You may want to set your answers aside for a while and come back to them later to see if any have changed or if you have anything to add.

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    What Would Your Best Life Look Like?

    Describe your ideal life in detail. Allow yourself to dream and imagine, and create a vivid picture. If you can’t visualize a picture, focus on how your best life would feel. If you find it difficult to envision your life 20 or 30 years from now, start with five years—even a few years into the future will give you a place to start. What you see may surprise you. Set aside preconceived notions. This is your chance to dream and fantasize.

    A few prompts to get you started:

    • What will you have accomplished already?
    • How will you feel about yourself?
    • What kind of people are in your life? How do you feel about them?
    • What does your ideal day look like?
    • Where are you? Where do you live? Think specifics, what city, state, or country, type of community, house or an apartment, style and atmosphere.
    • What would you be doing?
    • Are you with another person, a group of people, or are you by yourself?
    • How are you dressed?
    • What’s your state of mind? Happy or sad? Contented or frustrated?
    • What does your physical body look like? How do you feel about that?
    • Does your best life make you smile and make your heart sing? If it doesn’t, dig deeper, dream bigger.

    It’s important to focus on the result, or at least a way-point in your life. Don’t think about the process for getting there yet—that’s the next stepGive yourself permission to revisit this vision every day, even if only for a few minutes. Keep your vision alive and in the front of your mind.

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    Plan Backwards

    It may sound counter-intuitive to plan backwards rather than forwards, but when you’re planning your life from the end result, it’s often more useful to consider the last step and work your way back to the first. This is actually a valuable and practical strategy for making your vision a reality.

    • What’s the last thing that would’ve had to happen to achieve your best life?
    • What’s the most important choice you would’ve had to make?
    • What would you have needed to learn along the way?
    • What important actions would you have had to take?
    • What beliefs would you have needed to change?
    • What habits or behaviors would you have had to cultivate?
    • What type of support would you have had to enlist?
    • How long will it have taken you to realize your best life?
    • What steps or milestones would you have needed to reach along the way?

    Now it’s time to think about your first step, and the next step after that. Ponder the gap between where you are now and where you want to be in the future. It may seem impossible, but it’s quite achievable if you take it step-by-step.

    It’s important to revisit this vision from time to time. Don’t be surprised if your answers to the questions, your technicolor vision, and the resulting plans change. That can actually be a very good thing; as you change in unforeseeable ways, the best life you envision will change as well. For now, it’s important to use the process, create your vision, and take the first step towards making that vision a reality.

    Featured photo credit: Matt Noble via unsplash.com

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