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7 Secrets Of Success From Tony Robbins That Will Lead To A More Successful Life

7 Secrets Of Success From Tony Robbins That Will Lead To A More Successful Life

Tony Robbins – he is the man. You know who he is, I know who he is. As a businessman, author, philanthropist, and motivational speaker, Tony Robbins has been helping people change their lives and improve for the better for the past 30 years. Best known for his self-help books, Unlimited Power and Unleash the Power within, Robbins has made millions of dollars, and helped business owners and regular people make money.

Here are 7 secrets to a successful life that can be learned from Tony Robbins and his career:

1. Mindfulness

To practice mindfulness, Tony has been channeling his energy by using practices that have been around for more than millennia and used by cultures around the world, and for good reason. They lower blood pressure, reduce anxiety, and improve overall health. It’s no wonder Tony uses priming exercises every morning!

One such practice is called Enlightenment, which began in India more than 2,500 years ago.

2. Raise Standards

Change comes from inside. It doesn’t matter what you do in life, you are not going to improve yourself unless you change and change begins within. Who gives a damn about achieving goals if you aren’t fulfilled when you do?

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Fulfill yourself by setting your standards way above what you think you can do.

3. Reset Mind & Mood

Tony has made the distinction between peak performance and poor performance clear and believes the difference is the state your body and mind is in.

If your body and mind aren’t synced, your performance will suffer, and you won’t go anywhere. Think about times you’re sad, depressed, or feel like giving up – how productive are you? Do you feel like moving, or doing anything? I certainly don’t.

It’s important to recognize when you’re in a sour mood and evaluate your body’s posture. Are you slouched over? Stand up straight. Sporting a frown? Why not try faking a smile? How we feel reflects how we stand – it’s that link between our brain and our body. That’s why confident, happy people (such as Tony Robbins) are always upright.

4. Let Go

There’s no way you can completely let go of a past that’s scarred you. When someone’s wronged us, we tend to hold onto that for years and years and years. Time passes and that grudge has seeded so deep in our subconscious that they affect us without our realizing it.

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We’re keeping all of the negative energy balled up in us, right? So, let it go. The past can’t be changed and what happened to you is not the you that you are today. It doesn’t affect your outcome today. So, let go.

It’s time to face reality: the past can’t be changed. Sure, you can look at the bad things that have happened you differently, but at the end of the day, they still can’t be changed. Center your time and focus on what you’re doing now to make a more efficient you for tomorrow.

Realize your sense of worth by evaluating what is important to you. What do you enjoy doing?

5. Look Confident

You know the conventional wisdom, “Don’t judge a book by its cover?” As good as it is, it’s pure bologna. People form impressions and opinions of you the moment they see you. They make judgments about the way you move, the way you walk, talk, and breathe.

How are your shoulders? If they’re slouched or crouched, fix them. Align your spine upright.

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Do you tend to fidget a lot? Play with your hands, clothes, hair, or constantly shift? These movements give you the air that you’re uncomfortable, which is bad news in the eyes of people who seek to judge you.

How’s your eye contact? Holding eye contact in conversations is a tremendously successful way of showing two things: 1) You’re actively listening to what’s being said, and 2) You’re not afraid. Most people look down, off to the side, or anywhere except who they’re talking to.

Standing like Superman for two minutes changes you psychologically, too. When you feel more capable handling situations, you start believing in yourself – and your thoughts change. Why? Body language.

Body language is a subtle communication between people. That’s why some of the most successful executives seem larger than life – their confidence is astronomical because of their body language. This gives their communication so much meaning.

People will sense this, on a subconscious level, and respect you more because you’re giving them non-verbal cues that you know exactly what you’re worth, as well as what you’re doing.

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6. Handle Stress

Believe it or not, how most people handle emotions can be summed up in four basic ways:

  1. We avoid them. We mentally, spiritually, and emotionally shut ourselves off to what’s happening and refuse to admit what’s going on. Some people often do this to not feel anything at all. Happiness, sadness, stress – they run from it. This keeps people from experiencing honest love when it’s right in front of them and keeps them in a shell, cutting off the very things life is made of.
  2. We deny them. No! No! No! We don’t believe we’re experiencing those negative emotions, like a loved one’s passing. This restraint often multiplies in intensity, and the stronger you bottle those emotions up, what happens? That’s right, you explode and lose control of yourself.
  3. We compete with the misery of other people. How many times, when someone’s shared an experience with you, you tried to one-up them? Say your friend lost their puppy. “Oh yeah?” We say, “That’s tragic. Reminds me of the time I lost my baby.” Or what about the time someone in your life had something incredible to them? A lot of people, from whom I’ve talked to, couldn’t let it happen. So, they shared their own experiences of happiness, instead of letting their friend enjoy the bonus. This competition helps nobody. It’s fruitless and isn’t the path to spiritual, or emotional growth.
  4. They learn from pain, and they learn from stress to better themselves – to challenge themselves and find those incremental shifts in perception, to handle situations later down the road. This is the truth: problems, sorrows, and obstacles are hidden “secrets” the universe puts before us to get farther in life.

7. Control Emotions

Controlling our emotions is no easy feat and it’s a struggle a lot of us deal with everyday. The amount of people in the world who don’t realize their potential and aren’t fulfilled because they don’t believe in themselves, and are divorced or their spouse leaves and their job performance is suffering – it’s enough to make anybody crack. And the more I realize this, the more I see this with my own eyes, the harder it is for me to see. I break down.

That’s why a super-fast way to take control of my emotions (and you can too) is by:

  • Identifying what I’m feeling.
  • Acknowledging these emotions, and thanking God I’m still alive to feel.
  • Figuring out what’s going on: I’m experiencing this for a reason, right? What is this reason.
  • Remembering how you’ve gotten over it before.
  • Knowing we can handle this emotion in the future, again, by dealing with it today.

Conclusion

If none of this works for you (are you honestly applying yourself?), head over to Netflix and watch Tony’s “I Am Not Your Guru” documentary. The film is an extraordinary, first-hand glimpse into the magic of Tony’s powerful seminars and will have you finding success on your own terms.

Featured photo credit: via pixabay.com via pixabay.com

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Last Updated on November 15, 2019

10 Real Reasons Why Breaking Bad Habits Is So Difficult

10 Real Reasons Why Breaking Bad Habits Is So Difficult

Bad habits expose us to suffering that is entirely avoidable. Unfortunately, these bad habits are difficult to break because they are 100% dependent on our mental and emotional state.

Anything we do that can prove harmful to us is a bad habit – drinking, drugs, smoking, procrastination, poor communication are all examples of bad habits. These habits have negative effects on our physical, mental and emotional health.

Humans are hardwired to respond to stimuli and to expect a consequence of any action. This is how habits are acquired: the brain expects to be rewarded a certain way under certain circumstances. How you initially responded to certain stimuli is how your brain will always remind you to behave when the same stimuli are experienced.

If you visited the bar close to your office with colleagues every Friday, your brain will learn to send you a signal to stop there even when you are alone and eventually not just on Fridays. It will expect the reward of a drink after work every day, which can potentially lead to a drinking problem.

Kicking negative behavior patterns and steering clear of them requires a lot of willpower and there are many reasons why breaking bad habits is so difficult.

1. Lack of Awareness or Acceptance

Breaking a bad habit is not possible if the person who has it is not aware that it is a bad one.

Many people will not realize that their communication skills are poor or that their procrastination is affecting them negatively, or even that the drink they had as a nightcap has now increased to three.

Awareness brings acceptance. Unless a person realizes on their own that a habit is bad, or someone manages to convince them of the same, there is very little chance of the habit being kicked.

2. No Motivation

Going through a divorce, not being able to cope with academics and falling into debt are instances that can bring a profound sense of failure with them. A person going through these times can fall into a cycle of negative thinking where the world is against them and nothing they can do will ever help, so they stop trying altogether.

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This give-up attitude is a bad habit that just keeps coming around. Being in debt could make you feel like you are failing at maintaining your home, family and life in general.

If you are looking to get out of a rut and feel motivated, take a look at this article: Why Is Internal Motivation So Powerful (And How to Find It)

3. Underlying Psychological Conditions

Psychological conditions such as depression and ADD can make it difficult to break bad habits.

A depressed person may find it difficult to summon the energy to cook a healthy meal, resulting in food being ordered in or consumption of packaged foods. This could lead to eventually become a habit that adversely affects health and is difficult to overcome.

A person with ADD may start to clean their house but get distracted soon after, leaving the task incomplete, eventually leading to a state where it is acceptable to live in a house that is untidy and dirty.

The fear of missing out (FOMO) is very real to some people. Obsessively checking their social media and news sources, they may believe that not knowing of something as soon as it is published can be catastrophic to their social standing.

4. Bad Habits Make Us Feel Good

One of the reasons it is difficult to break habits is that a lot of them make us feel good.[1]

We’ve all been there – the craving for a tub of ice cream after a breakup or a casual drag on a joint, never to be repeated until we miss how good it made us feel. We succumb to the craving for the pleasure felt while indulging in it, cementing it as a habit even while we are aware it isn’t good for us.

Over-eating is a very common bad habit. Just another pack of crisps, a couple of candies, a large soda… none of these are needed by us. We want them because they give us comfort. They’re familiar, they taste good and we don’t even notice when we progress from just one extra slice of pizza to four.

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You can read this article to learn more: We Do What We Know Is Bad for Us, Why?

5. Upward Comparisons

Comparisons are a bad habit that many of us have been exposed to since we were children. Parents might have compared us to siblings, teachers may have compared us to classmates, and bosses could compare us to past and present employees.

The people who have developed the bad habit of comparing themselves to others have been given incorrect yardsticks for measurement from the start.

These people will always find it difficult to break out of this bad habit because there will always be someone who has it better than they do: a better house, better car, better job, higher income and so on.

6. No Alternative

This is a real and valid reason why bad habits are hard to break. These habits could fulfill a need that may not be met any other way.

Someone who has physical or psychological limitations such as a disability or social anxiety may find it hard to quit obsessive content consumption for better habits.

Alternately, a perfectly healthy person may be unable to quit smoking because alternates are just not working out.

Similarly, a person who bites their nails when anxious may be unable to relieve stress in any other socially accepted manner.

7. Stress

As mentioned above, anything that stresses us out can lead to adopting and cementing bad habits.

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When a person is stressed about something, it is easy to give in to a bad habit because the mental resources required to fight them are not available.

Stress plays such a huge role in this that we commonly find a person who had previously managed to kick a bad habit fall back into the old ways because they felt their stress couldn’t be managed any other way.

8. Sense of Failure

People looking to kick bad habits may feel a strong sense of failure because it’s just that difficult.

Dropping a bad habit usually means changes in lifestyle that people may be unwilling to make, or these changes might not be easy to make in spite of the will to make them.

Over-eaters need to empty their house of unhealthy food, resist the urge to order in and not pick up their standard grocery items from the store.

Those who drink too much need to avoid the bars or even people who drink often.

If such people slip even once with a glass of wine or a smoke or a bag of chips, they tend to be excessively harsh on themselves and feel like failures.

9. The Need to Be All-New

People who are looking to break bad habits feel they need to re-create themselves in order to break themselves of their bad habits, while the truth is the complete opposite.

These people actually need to go back to who they were before they developed the bad habit.

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10. Force of Habit

Humans are creatures of habit and having familiar, comforting outcomes for daily triggers helps us maintain a sense of balance in our lives.

Consider people who are used to lighting up a cigarette every time they talk on the phone or munching on crisps when watching TV. They will always associate a phone call with a puff on the cigarette and screen time with eating.

These habits, though bad, are a source of comfort to them as is meeting with those people they indulge in these bad habits with.

Final Thoughts

These are the main reasons why bad habits may be difficult to break but it is important to remember that the task is not impossible.

Do you have bad habits you want to kick? My article How to Break a Bad Habit (and Replace It With a Good One) gives you tips on well, how to kick bad habits while my other article How Long Does It Take to Break a Habit? Science Will Tell You gives realistic information on what to expect while you’re trying to quit them.

There are many compassionate, positive and self-loving techniques to kick bad habits. The internet is rich in information regarding bad habits, their effects and how to overcome them, while professional help is always available for those who feel they need it.

Featured photo credit: NORTHFOLK via unsplash.com

Reference

[1] After Skool: Why Do Bad Habits Feel SO GOOD?

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