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8 Things That Prove Only Children Aren’t Spoilt But More Mature

8 Things That Prove Only Children Aren’t Spoilt But More Mature

I’ve faced this all my life. “Siblings?” they ask. “None,” I reply. “Oh, you’re an only child!” And I get raised eyebrows, sniggers, sneers, and even non-committal but pregnant murmuring. There’s a certain stigma attached to being an only child, the general perception that we are spoilt, petulant, and probably fit the word brat to a T. Seriously people, we aren’t all that different from you, and what you call our innate snootiness, is perhaps our inborn maturity.

Fact is, an only child has been dealing with being an only one all his or her life. And contrary to popular belief, being an only child is not a disease in itself. Don’t believe me? Read on to know what makes us strong, resilient, and mature.

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1. We’re not arrogant, we have higher IQs.

According to a study by the National Bureau of Economic Research, only children tend to have higher IQs, perform better in school, and are high achievers all their life – making them successful individuals on the whole. A lot of this has perhaps to do with the fact that only children get a lot of one-to-one attention with their parents.

2. What you call snobbishness, is our shyness.

Like everyone else who’s normal on a social front, we have friends, too. However, large groups tend to put us off – and when amidst too many people that we don’t know, we tend to be quieter. Don’t take this as us being snooty, we are merely trying to cope with our innate shyness.

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3. We tend to avoid conflict, and so usually get along.

As only children, we have missed out on the rough and tumble of siblings. We do not know how to fight it out with peers, and hardly know how to make up after that. So we try to avoid conflict on the whole, though we may sulk and walk around in a huff. Usually, this means we agree with the majority more often than we like to, and end up being labeled as team players, even if we really aren’t.

4. We are natural born worriers, but not bossy.

Only children are often labelled as being bossy and domineering. To an extent, this may hold true – since childhood, we’ve gone our way, unhampered by siblings. To a great level, this also means that we operate autonomously – it’s very often our way or the highway. This may make it difficult for people to get along with us, however – when it comes to family, it means that we very often take on the mantle of being the mother hen to every member.

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5. We have friends, but like our “me” time too.

How often do you hear people crib about having too much on their social plate? Not many of these complaining lot will be only children. Simply because as much as we like our friends and their company, we are used to spending some alone time and we value that highly – it keeps us sane!

6. We get along with authority figures.

We’ve dealt with authority figures all our lives. Unlike children with siblings, while we got all our parents’ love and affections, we bore the brunt of their temper single-handedly too. This means that early on, we learnt to deal with the adults and authority figures in our life – and this holds in good stead even when we ourselves are adults.

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7. We are our biggest critics, and competition.

Think because we didn’t face sibling rivalry, we are not competitive? Well then you are wrong. We are our biggest critics and tend to push ourselves into doing more, achieving more, and just trying to be more. Perhaps a result of us being the only person our parents could pin their hopes on. So love and affection sure, but we are also under intense pressure from our parents to succeed, however inadvertent.

8. We are not so very different from you.

Like all children, siblings or not, we pick up what we get from our parents and formative years and mold ourselves accordingly. Not having siblings does not make us any more or less weird – it just makes us what we all are – human, with our own unique foibles and follies. The thing about being an only child is that it is as normal as it not being one.

Remember that while being an only child may not make us special, it does not make us any less than a child who has had siblings. It is how it is, and only children make the best of it, like everyone else.

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Rima Pundir

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Last Updated on November 5, 2019

12 Powerful Habits of a Lifelong Learner

12 Powerful Habits of a Lifelong Learner

Formal education is something everyone has to go through to a certain degree, and the knowledge it offers isn’t always that practical in real life. Life long learning is how you improve as a person, bit by bit and day by day.

Life long learners recognize the importance and joy of growth so they never settle for what they currently know and always seek for improvement.

Here are 12 habits of people who value lifelong learning have in common – see how many of them you recognize in yourself.

1. They Read on a Daily Basis

Whatever problem or dilemma you currently face, there’s definitely at least one decent book that discusses it and presents a variety of solutions.

Reading is a great way to open up new horizons, train your brain and revolutionize your life. I can’t even count how many times books completely transformed the way I view the world, and it’s always a change for the better. Through reading, you can connect with successful people and learn from the lessons they share.

Life long learners love to get lost in books and do it regularly. Bill Gates knows that reading matters a lot; on his personal blog, he reviews plenty of game-changing books.

Due to technology, you can access a bookshelf of the wealthiest entrepreneur on this planet.

2. They Attend Various Courses

Whether it’s online or offline, there are countless courses you can participate in without spending a dime on it. These are great opportunities to connect with clever and like-minded people and learn from them.

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Because of the advanced technology, you can now gain knowledge from online programs, starting from coding through self-improvement to programs from top universities.

There are literally endless ways to thrive. What life long learners have in common is squeezing as much as possible out of these opportunities.

3. They Actively Seek Opportunities to Grow

Instead of spending your free time laying on the couch and watching TV, you prefer doing something creative and practical. You know every wasted minute is gone forever.

That’s why you’d rather practice your language skills with a native-speaker you’ve met, engage in local meet up or attend a class that teaches something you always wanted to learn.

Life long learners stay up-to-date with growth opportunities in their areas and participate in them frequently.

4. They Take Care of Their Bodies

“Physical fitness is not only one of the most important keys to a healthy body, it is the basis of dynamic and creative intellectual activity.” — John F. Kennedy

A clever mind combined with a body in a great condition is the best asset you can have. Our bodies were designed to run, walk, jump, swim, lift and much more. Leading a sedentary lifestyle harms both your physical and mental sphere.

Life long learners know the body is your temple. In order to make it flourish for as long as possible, they train regularly, move a lot and eat healthy.

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5. They Have Diverse Passions

Among Steve Jobs’ wise quotes, there’s one I like especially. It’s about connecting the dots:

“You can’t connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backward. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future.” — Steve Jobs

Each dot is some event or skill in your life, and it’s only when you go through these elements that you know how to combine them into something great.

Having a variety of passions indicates that you love to progress. By practicing different skills, you give yourself an advantage over the rest of the people. During hard times, you are more likely to to act intelligently and solve your problems with less effort.

6. They Love Making Progress

If behind the efforts, there is passion and a deep desire to grow, your chances of success are way higher, compared to when you are forced to learn.

Life long learners love to experience the constant growth and improvement. The breakthrough moments help them to notice the impressive change that took place because of the learning process. Any milestone serves as a driving force for further headway.

7. They Challenge Themselves with Specific Goals

In order to keep growing, you clearly define your goals. Smart goal setting is one of the tools to ensure constant growth.

Since you love challenges, a difficult goal doesn’t scare you. Quite the opposite, it keeps you motivated and engaged.

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Research showed that precise and ambitious goals increase the performance of an individual. As we already agreed, life long learners are people who care about their performance, hence they never stop improving.

8. They Embrace Change

A complete change can lead to incredible results. This is especially visible on the example of successful companies.

Oftentimes, it’s that transformation which created space for their so-called overnight success. Twitter was originally created as an internal service to serve Odeo employees. Currently, it has over 300 million monthly active users and is considered the second biggest social network.

As a life long learner, you know a change can lead to extraordinary results so you welcome it and stay open minded about making a shift.

9. They Believe It’s Never Too Late to Start Something

Some people tend to think after a certain age, they are no longer allowed to start something and become successful. The truth is, it’s just a lame excuse not to leave the comfort zone.

Opposite to common misconceptions, there’s no wrong age to begin something. Henry Ford was 45 when he invented the Ford Model T car, which is considered as the first affordable automobile.

Sure, for some domains like becoming a professional athlete, starting early is required. However, to learn and improve for its own sake, you are never too old.

10. Their Attitude to Getting Better Is Contagious

“We now accept the fact that learning is a life long process of keeping abreast of change. And the most pressing task is to teach people how to learn.” — Peter Drucker

There’s nothing better than to see your surroundings getting involved in what you actively participate in. Oftentimes, the best way to achieve that is to inspire them and be the example. As Gandhi would say, you need to be the change you want to see in the world.

As a life long learner, you are extremely passionate about the constant growth and people around you can sense that positive attitude. As a result, they start acting similarly.

11. They Leave Their Comfort Zone

Is it really better to step out of your comfort zone? The answer is always yes.

You always embrace discomfort as you know the path to success leads through hardship and countless obstacles. Instead of being afraid of facing them, you challenge yourself to overcome more and more difficult handicaps.

Every time you get out of your comfort zone, regardless whether you win or fail, you learn something new. That’s the part you love the most!

12. They Never Settle Down

“Knowledge is exploding, so you need to commit yourself to a plan for life long learning.” — Don Tapscott

A sense of being clever enough is something you don’t experience. Without a doubt, you appreciate what you already know, but that’s never a reason to stop. You just know once you stop learning, you lose the amazing privilege humans have, namely an ability to a never-ending intellectual development.

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Featured photo credit: Christin Hume via unsplash.com

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