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8 Things That Prove Only Children Aren’t Spoilt But More Mature

8 Things That Prove Only Children Aren’t Spoilt But More Mature

I’ve faced this all my life. “Siblings?” they ask. “None,” I reply. “Oh, you’re an only child!” And I get raised eyebrows, sniggers, sneers, and even non-committal but pregnant murmuring. There’s a certain stigma attached to being an only child, the general perception that we are spoilt, petulant, and probably fit the word brat to a T. Seriously people, we aren’t all that different from you, and what you call our innate snootiness, is perhaps our inborn maturity.

Fact is, an only child has been dealing with being an only one all his or her life. And contrary to popular belief, being an only child is not a disease in itself. Don’t believe me? Read on to know what makes us strong, resilient, and mature.

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1. We’re not arrogant, we have higher IQs.

According to a study by the National Bureau of Economic Research, only children tend to have higher IQs, perform better in school, and are high achievers all their life – making them successful individuals on the whole. A lot of this has perhaps to do with the fact that only children get a lot of one-to-one attention with their parents.

2. What you call snobbishness, is our shyness.

Like everyone else who’s normal on a social front, we have friends, too. However, large groups tend to put us off – and when amidst too many people that we don’t know, we tend to be quieter. Don’t take this as us being snooty, we are merely trying to cope with our innate shyness.

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3. We tend to avoid conflict, and so usually get along.

As only children, we have missed out on the rough and tumble of siblings. We do not know how to fight it out with peers, and hardly know how to make up after that. So we try to avoid conflict on the whole, though we may sulk and walk around in a huff. Usually, this means we agree with the majority more often than we like to, and end up being labeled as team players, even if we really aren’t.

4. We are natural born worriers, but not bossy.

Only children are often labelled as being bossy and domineering. To an extent, this may hold true – since childhood, we’ve gone our way, unhampered by siblings. To a great level, this also means that we operate autonomously – it’s very often our way or the highway. This may make it difficult for people to get along with us, however – when it comes to family, it means that we very often take on the mantle of being the mother hen to every member.

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5. We have friends, but like our “me” time too.

How often do you hear people crib about having too much on their social plate? Not many of these complaining lot will be only children. Simply because as much as we like our friends and their company, we are used to spending some alone time and we value that highly – it keeps us sane!

6. We get along with authority figures.

We’ve dealt with authority figures all our lives. Unlike children with siblings, while we got all our parents’ love and affections, we bore the brunt of their temper single-handedly too. This means that early on, we learnt to deal with the adults and authority figures in our life – and this holds in good stead even when we ourselves are adults.

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7. We are our biggest critics, and competition.

Think because we didn’t face sibling rivalry, we are not competitive? Well then you are wrong. We are our biggest critics and tend to push ourselves into doing more, achieving more, and just trying to be more. Perhaps a result of us being the only person our parents could pin their hopes on. So love and affection sure, but we are also under intense pressure from our parents to succeed, however inadvertent.

8. We are not so very different from you.

Like all children, siblings or not, we pick up what we get from our parents and formative years and mold ourselves accordingly. Not having siblings does not make us any more or less weird – it just makes us what we all are – human, with our own unique foibles and follies. The thing about being an only child is that it is as normal as it not being one.

Remember that while being an only child may not make us special, it does not make us any less than a child who has had siblings. It is how it is, and only children make the best of it, like everyone else.

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

7 Powerful Questions To Find Out What You Want To Do With Your Life

What do I want to do with my life? It’s a question all of us think about at one point or another.

For some, the answer comes easily. For others, it takes a lifetime to figure out.

It’s easy to just go through the motions and continue to do what’s comfortable and familiar. But for those of you who seek fulfillment, who want to do more, these questions will help you paint a clearer picture of what you want to do with your life.

1. What are the things I’m most passionate about?

The first step to living a more fulfilling life is to think about the things that you’re passionate about.

What do you love? What fulfills you? What “work” do you do that doesn’t feel like work? Maybe you enjoy writing, maybe you love working with animals or maybe you have a knack for photography.

The point is, figure out what you love doing, then do more of it.

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2. What are my greatest accomplishments in life so far?

Think about your past experiences and the things in your life you’re most proud of.

How did those accomplishments make you feel? Pretty darn good, right? So why not try and emulate those experiences and feelings?

If you ran a marathon once and loved the feeling you had afterwards, start training for another one. If your child grew up to be a star athlete or musician because of your teachings, then be a coach or mentor for other kids.

Continue to do the things that have been most fulfilling for you.

3. If my life had absolutely no limits, what would I choose to have and what would I choose to do?

Here’s a cool exercise: Think about what you would do if you had no limits.

If you had all the money and time in the world, where would you go? What would you do? Who would you spend time with?

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These answers can help you figure out what you want to do with your life. It doesn’t mean you need millions of dollars to be happy though.

What it does mean is answering these questions will help you set goals to reach certain milestones and create a path toward happiness and fulfillment. Which leads to our next question …

4. What are my goals in life?

Goals are a necessary component to set you up for a happy future. So answer these questions:

Once you figure out the answers to each of these, you’ll have a much better idea of what you should do with your life.

5. Whom do I admire most in the world?

Following the path of successful people can set you up for success.

Think about the people you respect and admire most. What are their best qualities? Why do you respect them? What can you learn from them?

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You’re the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.[1] So don’t waste your time with people who hold you back from achieving your dreams.

Spend more time with happy, successful, optimistic people and you’ll become one of them.

6. What do I not like to do?

An important part of figuring out what you want to do with your life is honestly assessing what you don’t want to do.

What are the things you despise? What bugs you the most about your current job?

Maybe you hate meetings even though you sit through 6 hours of them every day. If that’s the case, find a job where you can work more independently.

The point is, if you want something to change in your life, you need to take action. Which leads to our final question …

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7. How hard am I willing to work to get what I want?

Great accomplishments never come easy. If you want to do great things with your life, you’re going to have to make a great effort. That will probably mean putting in more hours the average person, getting outside your comfort zone and learning as much as you can to achieve as much as you can.

But here’s the cool part: it’s often the journey that is the most fulfilling part. It’s during these seemingly small, insignificant moments that you’ll often find that “aha” moments that helps you answer the question,

“What do I want to do with my life?”

So take the first step toward improving your life. You won’t regret it.

Featured photo credit: Andrew Ly via unsplash.com

Reference

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