Advertising
Advertising

The Law Of Attraction: The Part No One Wants To Talk About

The Law Of Attraction: The Part No One Wants To Talk About

Law of Attraction: “The belief that positive thoughts are magnets for positive life experiences and negative thoughts are magnets for negative life experiences.” – Urban Dictionary

I understand the theory of the Law of Attraction. It makes sense. Until, of course, I think about the multitudes of children that have less than ideal, at best, and horrendous and terrifying, at worst, childhood experiences. Did their thoughts draw the negative experiences they had? Experiences that often start in infancy? Did mine?

Are we born with different energy vibrations?

With those questions in mind, I was led to presume we are born into this world with different energy vibrations, thereby attracting differing experiences. So why are we born with different vibrational energies? Is it possible that our vibrational energy at birth is based on the growth we experienced in our past life and how we left this world at that time?

Now, that is some heavy duty stuff. It also assumes I believe that we come here more than once. Although I have thoughts and opinions about that, we are going to stay focused right here and right now, since that is the reality with which we have to work.

Should we focus on what we have or on what we don’t have?

I am no expert on Universal Laws or specifically, the Law of Attraction. I am, however, becoming an expert on my own life experience. Years ago, before the law of attraction was even on my radar or was everywhere in the media, I was well into adulthood. My thoughts were not on healing and positivity. I did know I wanted to feel better, despite thinking that was not possible for me.

My thoughts were an out of control freight train, powering through my mind, searching for answers to questions, still unarticulated. My negativity run amok. I was angry, hurt, confused and discontent.

Advertising

I remember thinking I “should” be grateful and thankful for all the good I have in my life. At some level, I think I was, but I was also angry and was much more focused on what was lacking, which flies in the face of the law of attraction.

Yet, if we are not aware of what is lacking, how can we know what we want? Identifying what is lacking is a necessary step towards the manifestation of what we do want.

Sometimes it feels like, we’ll never be happy

When someone suggested I express gratitude for what was happening in my life, I was pretty sure they had no idea what I was feeling, as I gave them a resentful sneer. I could not express gratitude. I would not express gratitude for the misery I carried in my heart. I was angry enough at everything and everyone to withhold any gratitude I might have actually been feeling. Just out of spite. Yup, that was me.

There came a point, when I could be nothing other than what I was in that moment. I couldn’t fake anything. I could not see far enough ahead to see myself feeling happy, nor could I imagine what it looked like, let alone that it might be available to me.

I am assuming that most people who are hurting, physically or emotionally, long to feel better. Self-defeating behaviors that appear to the onlooker to be a self-fulfilling prophecy, might be the only way they know how to feel better in that particular moment.

Sometimes we choose the wrong things to comfort us instead of being mindful

I cannot begin to tell you the number of times I have lost that “last ten pounds”. So, if I want to lose that ten pounds and keep it off, then why am I eating a pint of ice cream? At any point I could have stopped this defeatist behavior.

Advertising

Why not at the store when I was examining the flavors available? How about when I took it from my cart and laid it on the belt at checkout? Why not when I was taking it out of my freezer and not scooping an appropriate portion into a bowl? How about when I was a quarter or even half way through the pint and could have put the lid on and placed it back into the freezer?

Well, because it was my comfort, my best friend. I did not care about any article on the “Ten Things To Do To Avoid Overeating” or counting to ten to let the impulse pass or most especially, “sitting with my feelings” instead. Hell, that is why I wanted the ice cream! Nope, hands down, I chose the ice cream. If it was mind over matter, matter won every time.

Listen to yourself, you already know what you want

If I was reading about and attempting to manifest what I wanted in my life, through the law of attraction, I would certainly have felt like a complete failure. Which I was already feeling. And isn’t that exactly the problem? I wanted to snap out on those positive, happy-go-lucky people, who did not seem to experience life the way I did. I was envious of of them. They irritated me.

So with all this negativity, how then did I find myself on a trajectory of healing, wholeness and good things, in spite of myself?! Is it possible that the often unspoken and unacknowledged desire to feel better or be happy, sets the law of attraction into motion, despite despair and negativity? I give that a resounding, “YES”.

I believe that way down deep, despite the negativity that crowds out positive thoughts, caused by the “I’m not enough” syndrome, most people know what they want. I believe most of us want the same things. We want to be understood, accepted and loved. We want to feel valued and have purpose. We want to matter. We so want to matter. And we do. The problem is, most don’t know it.

How to get what you desire

In that tucked away space, where the sun has yet to shine, the Law of Attraction is percolating away, inviting its manifestation. So what is the part of the Law of Attraction that no one talks about? It is what has to happen between identifying my desire and getting it.

Advertising

It is necessary to move away from old energy patterns, to make way for the new. And that means facing myself. That means grappling with those old and often deep seated beliefs that are no longer useful. That means feeling unresolved emotions.

If you have spent any time looking at the multitudes of books and articles related to the Law of Attraction and how to get what you want, then you already know that a big part of that process is believing you already have it. Feeling as though it is already true.

Check your deepest beliefs

When I was where I was, when I wasn’t where I am now, I could not make it feel true. It was a process of two steps forward and three steps back. I had to first acknowledge I didn’t believe I deserved to be happy or have the good things in life. That baby step led to the next and the next and there now sits a chasm between where I was and where I now am.

If I don’t believe I deserve to have the healthy body I want, then I won’t. That’s the Law of Attraction, right? So I have to ask myself, why don’t I believe I deserve that? If I do think I deserve it and still can’t manifest it, then I have to again ask, why?

What is the deep seated belief I unknowingly hold, that needs to be coaxed to the surface, lovingly held and gently released? I have found this question to be useful again and again and again. As I acknowledge and heal one part, it opens the door and invites another to show up for the same attention. And it is a never ending process of manifesting in my life more and more of what I want.

When I stand still, I see the horizon out ahead. When I grow, I move forward and the horizon moves forward as well. I then see things I couldn’t see or understand from my previous viewpoint. If you are asking for a healthy relationship, then won’t the universe need to address the parts of you that draws unhealthy. Don’t you have to be healthy before you can have healthy? Otherwise isn’t it doomed to fail?

Advertising

Take account of where you are right now

Another definition for the Law of Attraction is: “You get what you are, not what you want.” So each time we heal some part of ourselves, our vibrational energy increases and more positive will come into your life. What you want will show up, unexpectedly bearing gifts, for your life.

It won’t come in one fell swoop. You will be unable to maintain it, because you aren’t yet ready for it. Trust that the universe has your back, all the time, in every way, always working things out for your good. If you can see the prize, then see it. If you can feel what it will be like to have the prize, then by all means do so.

But if you can’t, then it is okay to be right where you are right now, in your pain. When the pain starts to clear, so will your mind. Know it is enough to want to be able to see what is up ahead, even if you can’t. Failure does not exist in the Law of Attraction. You are not in a race with anyone else. Social media only looks like everyone’s life is better than yours!

Take the baby step of acknowledging right where you are. Right here. Right now. No need to pretend.

And one day you will be saying, “Hey, all you positive, happy-go-lucky people, power to you! Maybe you were born at a higher frequency than me and had a head start. But hey, watch out, because this is a whole new life and I am right on your tail!”

Featured photo credit: William Stitt via images.unsplash.com

More by this author

Sandra Cooper

Psychotherapist

New Year’s Resolutions and Better Health Will The Real Me, Please Stand Up! Which One Of Those Voices In Your Head is Yours The Law Of Attraction: The Part No One Wants To Talk About

Trending in Health

1 11 Simple and Effective Ways to Manage Stress 2 Causes of Insomnia and How to Overcome It (The Complete Guide) 3 13 Bad Habits You Need to Quit Right Away 4 Can You Stop Depression from Damaging Your Brain? 5 Why You’re Feeling Tired All the Time (And What to Do About It)

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on May 25, 2019

20 Spaghetti Squash Recipes For Anyone Who Is Looking For Delicious, Healthy Comfort Food

20 Spaghetti Squash Recipes For Anyone Who Is Looking For Delicious, Healthy Comfort Food

Spaghetti squash is similar to cucumber. It has a shell which is difficult to pierce and this hard flesh surrounds a hollow cavity filled with seeds. When you cook this vegetable, the squash flesh falls away from the inner cavity and only the reminiscent of spaghetti remains. You can get surprised and delighted to see how this vegetable transforms with cooking.

It can act as a great substitute to pasta. It tastes as delicious as the traditional pasta and is equally satisfying but healthier. It is gluten free and contains many nutrients like vitamin A, potassium and folic acid.

This incredible vegetable can be boiled, baked or steamed. And, a lot of recipes can be prepared with spaghetti squash as the chief ingredient. I’m sure the following recipes will make your mouth water.

Breakfast

1. Spiced Coconut Squash Breakfast Porridge

1

    This unconventional porridge, prepared for breakfast, is a perfect dish to start your day. The ingredients include spaghetti squash, organic coconut milk, ginger, coconut flour, maple syrup, cinnamon, sea salt and vanilla extract. It has a comforting and creamy texture and is best served with fresh fruit topping. (Click here for recipe)

    2. Egg and Avocado Spaghetti Squash Boats

    2

      If you’re looking for a light, healthy, gluten free, vegetarian breakfast then avocado spaghetti squash boats is the best option. Besides chopping the squash, breaking the egg and slicing the avocado, this recipe doesn’t require much effort in its preparation. It tastes amazing with egg yolk and salsa and has a rich decadent texture. (Click here for recipe)

      3. Spaghetti Squash Frittata for One

      3

        This frittata, if prepared perfectly, can be an excellent choice for a healthy meal. It is a combination of lots of spaghetti squash, a few white eggs, some red pepper for color and texture, few onions and garlic for flavor, and some fresh herbs for brightness. This dish is usually served large in size and tastes great with tomato sauce and bean balls. (Click here for recipe)

        Advertising

        4. Ingredient Spaghetti Squash Brunch

        4

          It’s a fast and easy breakfast that contains a poached egg and feta on a pre-roasted pile of spaghetti squash bed. The yolk from the egg floods through the scraps of squash underneath. It almost tastes like an Italian pasta and the light crumble of feta adds more calcium and protein. (Click here for recipe)

          5. Spaghetti Squash Hash Browns

          5

            A very healthy take on hash browns in which spaghetti squash is used in place of potatoes and coconut oil in place of butter. This reduces stress, inflammation and starch, making it healthier than traditional hash browns. It helps lose water weight as well which is helpful for weight loss. The final product is fluffy on the inside but crispy on the outside. It is best served alongside some dippy eggs. (Click here for recipe and image source)

            Lunch

            6. Spaghetti Squash Chow Mein

            6

              Spaghetti squash can not only replace Italian pasta but it can also replace the Chinese noodles. They are a delicious, satisfying dish, prepared by stirring and frying spaghetti squash with a rainbow of other vegetables along with a sweet smelling mixture of fish sauce, rice vinegar and soy. They are gluten free and grease free which makes them healthier. (Click here for recipe)

              7. Parmesan Zucchini and Spaghetti Squash with Pine Nuts

              7

                This dish is a marvelous combination of garlic, spaghetti squash, parmesan, toasted pine and zucchini nuts. It’s super healthy, gluten free, full of vegetables and delicious. Tossed with olive oil, this dish meets all the dietary needs and is perfect for light lunch. You can also add some chicken to increase protein.  (Click here for recipe)

                 8. Spaghetti Squash with Mushrooms Parmesan

                Advertising

                8

                  Though spaghetti squash provides low calories, you can add meaty mushroom and a good amount of parmesan cheese to increase the amount of calories. It’s a healthy, full of flavor, vegetarian dish, and has cheap and easy ingredients which you can find in market. The final product is yummy and satisfying and can make your lunch, perfect.  (Click here for recipe)

                   9. Spaghetti Squash with Vegan Fire-Roasted Tomato Cream Sauce

                  9

                    A pile of roasted squash is flavored with a sauce made from five ingredients. The vegan fire-roasted tomato cream sauce is made from the mixture of tomatoes, cashews, basil, salt and water. This spicy sauce makes it more delicious and some small amount of basil adds fresh green color and flavor. (Click here for recipe)

                     10. Thai Peanut Spaghetti Squash

                    10

                      Most of the dishes listed here are either Mexican or Italian. This recipe however will give you a fresh Asian feeling. To prepare this, all you need are spaghetti squash and peanut sauce, then by adding some ginger, lime and vinegar you’ll get one of the most delicious recipes. The texture of this dish reminds you of heavenly beaches in Thailand. (Click here for the recipe)

                      Dinner

                      11. Spaghetti Squash Comfort Bowl

                      11

                        This is the perfect kind of bowl that you want to have on a cold evening, sitting on a couch and watching TV. You’ll enjoy its lightly steamed veggies, allspice beans, and the strands of squash as well. It feels creamy but doesn’t seem too heavy. It’s a great dish with intense indulgence, with our best spaghetti squash, the warm beans, and the comforting steamed veggies. (Click here for the recipe)

                        12. Spaghetti Squash Crust Pizza

                        12

                          As you already know, spaghetti squash is a great substitute for pasta, but this dish here shows how these chewy shreds can make a great stand-in for pizza. You can add anything like meat or veggies to the base which is bound with egg whites and flour. The end product is a great gluten free dish. (Click here for the recipe)

                          Advertising

                          13. Spaghetti Squash Fried Rice

                          13

                            Spaghetti squash works as a good substitute to the cauliflower as the base of a fried rice. This recipe includes almost all of the usual ingredients of a fried rice. With green onions, eggs, peanut oil, and some garlic, this dish gives a unique texture that you can never find in your local restaurants. (Click here for the recipe)

                             14. Roasted Garlic Spaghetti Squash Lasagna Boats

                            14

                              If you’re looking for something delicious for the winter evenings, you’ll get fond of these cheesy spaghetti squash boats. To lighten it up, it is filled with tomato sauce, cheese, chicken sausage, parmesan and ricotta. You can easily complete its arrangement ahead of time and bake it before dinner. (Click here for the recipe)

                              15. Chicken Enchilada Stuffed Spaghetti Squash

                              15

                                This Mexican inspired dish has spaghetti squash as a serving bowl and inside it goes enchilada sauce, chicken, cheese, black beans and other veggies wrapped inside a corn tortilla blanket. You can also use spinach in place of the corn and black beans. Topped with sauce galore, this dish can be served as a family fun meal.  (Click here for the recipe)

                                Dessert

                                16. Sweet Spaghetti Squash Kugel with Apples and Raisins

                                16

                                  If you can afford spaghetti squash, coconut sugar, some eggs and few other ingredients, then this dish must be your cheapest choice. This noodle is a delight in all seasons. The addition of some apples and raisins results in its fruity freshness. (Click here for the recipe)

                                  17. Spaghetti Squash Coconut Custard Pie

                                  Advertising

                                  17

                                    With the fine sweetness from vanilla extract and coconut, this dessert can be a great hit among guests. The spaghetti squash drowns in an egg batter to make it lighter than a cream pie. You can play and experiment with the ingredients and see surprising results.  (Click here for the recipe)

                                     18. Spaghetti Squash Cake With Cream Cheese Glaze

                                    18

                                      This desert will be a delicious treat to those who are a fan of carrot cake. Spaghetti squash is a vegetable with pleasant taste, lending fiber, potassium and vitamins. So, if you drape it in cream cheese frosting, you will end with this mouth- watering cake. This dessert has so many health benefits and is also great for a Thanksgiving dinner. (Click here for the recipe)

                                       19. Spaghetti Squash Kheer

                                      19

                                        Kheer is a rice pudding made by boiling rice with cow milk and sugar. But this type of kheer replaces boiling rice with noodles swapped out of spaghetti squash and cow milk with coconut milk. By pouring some ghee, you can add necessary richness in it. It is healthier than traditional kheer and can act as a great dessert for your evenings. (Click here for the recipe)

                                         20. Cinnamon Spice Spaghetti Squash Cake

                                        20

                                          By now, you must be surprised by the versatility of spaghetti squash. But your best surprise will probably come after you finish preparing this cake. This cake is a game changer. You’ll have the taste of lots of veggies like cinnamon, allspice maple syrup and ginger, all inside a single cake.  It’s a perfect treat for picky eaters. (Click here for the recipe)

                                          Featured photo credit: Spaghetti Squash with Fire Roasted Tomato, Olive and Baby Spinach Sauce via commons.wikimedia.org

                                          Read Next