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Personal Authenticity – It Cuts Both Ways

Personal Authenticity – It Cuts Both Ways

In my previous article, Will The Real You Please Stand Up, I looked at the importance in developing personal success and personal authenticity. This is grounded in accepting yourself as you are. More than that, it’s all about liking yourself as you are. Authenticity is critical to trust, trust is the cornerstone of influence, and influence is the foundation of success.

This relationship is widely recognized, but not so well understood. Which is a shame, because most of us don’t realize that we all of us possess, right now, the essential ingredient for success in our personal, and our professional, lives – an authentic “me”.

That personal authenticity brings success in the truth, and nothing but the truth. But it isn’t the whole truth. Lawyers understand this very well.  They’ll tell you that a jury will only believe a witness if that witness is both credible and reliable. The same test is applied by anyone you set out to influence in your business or your personal life.

Personal Authenticity Means Self-Knowledge

Here’s how it works. If someone believes that the personality I present to them is genuine – the real me as against something role-played for effect – they’re more likely to trust me.  Put it another way, if they don’t believe I’m genuine they flat out won’t. Tempting as it often, is to try to appear different to, or more than, we really are. We’re not as a rule, good at it. If you know you’re not being honest, then the chances are, your audience will too. Game over.

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I must speak in measured terms. Say only what I know and can show, to be true. I should not exaggerate, even when it appears to be in my interest to do so. And I must always do what I say I’ll do. Doing these things will lend enormous weight to what I say. More than this, it will add confidence to how I say it. I will be credible, I will be reliable and I will be trusted. What I say will carry authority, and will have impact.

This is the essence of the relationship between personal authenticity and success. And, critically, authenticity has to be both internal and external, central to your relationship with yourself as well as with others. The internal part, the self-appraisal, is seen by many as a negative process – an exercise in fault-finding at best, self immolation at worst. It isn’t that.

It’s about identifying areas of relative strength and weakness, recognizing the contribution of each to the whole you, and accepting what you find. This is catharsis at its best and may be the most empowering thing you ever do.

What makes the connection with success is how you leverage the authentic “me”; it’s how your actions create the trust, and through that the influence, that unlocks the door. It should be a planned process, because success, however it may appear, is not random or a matter of chance. It is the result of conscious planning and conscious action.

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Personal Authenticity Means Integrity

Another word for this is integrity. It’s the honesty with which we interact both with ourselves and with others. It’s our uncompromising adherence to the principles by which we choose to live our lives. And it is a matter of choice. We’re all capable of it, and no-one can take it away. Which is good, because integrity is the bedrock of our personal wellbeing; it makes us confident, it makes us happy and it makes us successful.

When you understand the role of personal integrity you can leverage it to scale your success. Your integrity is leverage, of and by itself. The more faithful you are to your true self and the more honest your approach, the greater will be your credibility, your authority and your impact.

The more widely you practice this approach, the wider your success. And here, again, the balance between internal and external is key. Success is the product of value given; the more value you give to the greater number of people the greater your success will be. Crucially, however, whatever the number of those people, one of them has to be you. There has to be balance between helping others and helping yourself – a balance between self and service, to borrow a phrase from Laurie Ellinghausen.

A life of absolute service is noble in concept but hardly fulfilling. We all need to eat, to be stimulated and to enjoy. The alternative life of absolute self is scarcely more appealing. Taken in its terms we live, and die, alone.

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The necessary balance requires us to recognize, and to be comfortable with, our own value. Too many of us don’t. We under-value ourselves and we don’t ask for – we don’t even look for – our true worth. Understanding our own value is an integral step in the journey of self-discovery by which we come to authenticity. And, like success, it can be scaled. The more value you can offer, the more you can command.

Don’t just be true about yourself. Be true to yourself.

This above all – to thine own self be true,

And it must follow, as the night the day,

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Thou canst not then be false to any man.

Polonius; Hamlet Act I Scene III – William Shakespeare

Featured photo credit: matt jones via magdeleine.co

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Last Updated on February 15, 2019

How to Achieve Goals and Increase Your Chance of Success

How to Achieve Goals and Increase Your Chance of Success

Does it ever feel like the things you want to accomplish always end up on the back burner? If the answer to that question is “yes,” you’re not alone. Only about 33% of people consistently work toward their goals. In some cases, their goals may seem too lofty to accomplish, or else they aren’t sure how to make a plan for them.

If you don’t come up with concrete steps to take toward your goals, they’ll remain dreams. There’s nothing wrong with being a dreamer, but being able to turn your dreams into goals you can realize will help you lead a happier and more fulfilling life.

Luckily, you can realize almost any dream when you harness the right goal-setting methods.

In this article, I’ll show you how to achieve goals and get closer you success.

1. Break your dreams down into specific and measurable steps

We couldn’t talk about goal-setting without mentioning SMART goals.

SMART goals are specific, measurable, assignable, realistic, and time-related.

Specific and measurable steps are so important because if we don’t know what our target it, how can we ever hit it?

Take all those beautiful dreams you have for yourself and make them into things you can actually do. If you want to be an entrepreneur, for example, a step toward realizing your dream might be researching what you’ll need to start your business.

Find out more tips about utilizing SMART goals here:

How to Use SMART Goal to Become Highly Successful in Life

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2. Have at least one clearly defined goal for every interest and role in your life

It’s so easy to become complacent or stagnate. We often think that our careers are the only places where we need to set goals, but we aren’t only what we do.

To make the most of your life, take the approach that you’re always learning and growing in everything you do. Anything worth doing is worth doing well after all.

Set goals whether you’re sponsoring an activity for your child, taking up guitar lessons or trying to prove your worth at work.

You’ll notice that this approach forces you to constantly develop new skills. It can also be fulfilling to put more focus and value into all areas of your life— not just the ones related to our careers.

3. Align your goals with your life’s mission, purpose and passion

Take the opportunity to do some soul-searching. What is it that you want to do with this precious life of yours?

Anything that conflicts with your life’s purpose is bound to cause discontent. Staying in a bad relationship, doing a job that goes against your values, or maintaining the status quo just because it’s comfortable are not options for you.

Thinking about your goals in this way can help you eliminate things in your life that don’t serve you. This frees up mental space that you can use to do the things you care about the most.

Many of us struggle to find the time to work on our goals, but this strategy enables you to make more time.

4. Create goals that ignite your spirit and inspire you to take action

If you can’t be fired up about your goals from the start, they might not be good goals for you.

The road to success is often tough. You’re going to have times when you might feel tired or discouraged.

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You need to feel inspired enough that you’ll be able to overcome obstacles as you encounter them.

If what you’re doing motivates you to be the greatest version of yourself, you’ll be much more resilient.

5. Write down all your goals in specific, measurable detail

This is your road map for what success will look like. The more you define what you want the finished product to be, the greater the chance that you’ll reach that vision.

When you write down your goals, you’re creating a document that you can revisit to make sure you’re on track.

When you’re in the middle of trying to achieve a big goal, it can be hard to see what’s working for you. The things you write in this step will help you stay on-message as you take your goals out of your mind and into the real world.

Don’t just write down your goals and stash them away in a folder somewhere. Take the extra step to put them somewhere where you’ll see them.[1]

If you have too many goals to post on your desk, write a summary or choose one or two steps to work on for the day. Just seeing them will keep them in the front of your mind.

6. Commit to hitting each of your targets without exception

You wouldn’t have created the target if you didn’t think it was necessary. Hold yourself accountable for taking the steps to succeed.

You can always adapt your strategy or break your targets into smaller steps if you find that they aren’t attainable as you originally wrote them.

Hitting even the smallest target is cause for a celebration. It’s a step in the positive direction. Your success will make you crave more success.

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We often make excuses when we get tired or overwhelmed. Take away the option to make excuses. You will only be satisfied with the best effort from yourself.

7. Share your goals with others to motivate each other

There’s something so powerful about people sharing their goals and dreams with one another. Doing so gives voice to some part of us that could remain hidden (and therefore never be accomplished).

When other people know about your goals, they can cheer you on and hold you accountable. When people share their vision with you, you can do the same for them.

This strategy is particularly beneficial when you’re trying to develop healthy habits. Post about your workout on social media, or do a healthy eating challenge with your best friend. You’ll be less likely to slack when temptation arises, and you’ll probably encourage someone else to reach for their goals too.

8. Set a series of daily, weekly and long-term goals, complete with starting times and deadlines

Many goals never reach realization simply because the goal-setter doesn’t check their progress. People tend to forget what they set out to do, or their goal gets crowded out by other obligations.

Forcing yourself to revisit your goals at regular intervals breaks them into smaller steps and it reminds you to think about them.

Giving yourself regular deadlines for smaller tasks related to your goals also helps you reflect on your strategy. You’ll figure out what works for you, whether your timeline is realistic, and whether or not you need additional help to stay on track.

In addition, celebrating small wins helps you stay motivated. Here’s how:

How To Celebrate Small Wins To Achieve Big Goals

9. Take 10 minutes every day to imagine how great it will feel to achieve your goals

Visualization is such a powerful tool. Some of the most successful athletes, celebrities and business people take time each day to think about how success looks and feels for them.[2] Imagining that feeling of satisfaction can be a great motivator.

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When you do meet your goals, take some time to be grateful. Thank yourself for showing up and doing the work. Be grateful when the stars align properly to help you advance to the next step.

It’s not just getting to the destination of your goals that matters. How you take the journey is important too.

10. Take an action step toward reaching your goals every day

Your goals can easily get buried in the hustle and the bustle. Even the smallest step in the right direction is still moving you forward.

Keep chipping away at the work every day and before long, you’ll start to see those dreams come to life.

Maybe you didn’t start your business today but you designed the logo that’s going to go on your website and business cards. Doing that task well is going to help you so much in the long run.

Concrete actions day by day draw your dreams out of obscurity and into the realm of possibility.

The Bottom Line

Dreams can inspire and overwhelm us. By turning our dreams into goals that we can work toward, we increase our chances of success. Things that once seemed impossible are suddenly within reach.

It’s time to start turning your dreams into goals and your goals into realities. Change begins today.

More Resources About Setting & Achieving Goals

Featured photo credit: Andrew Neel via unsplash.com

Reference

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