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You Don’t Need To Be Strong All The Time, It’s OK To Feel Weak And Cry

You Don’t Need To Be Strong All The Time, It’s OK To Feel Weak And Cry

When 9-year-old Bruce struggles to break a board during his initiation test into the Cave of Adullam Transformation Training Academy in Detroit, Michigan, he found himself briefly battling back tears, which then start to run down his cheeks.

Bruce was embarrassed, but his strong yet patient instructor kneeled down and reassured him that it’s okay to cry. It’s okay for boys and men to cry and show emotion, because life is full of challenges and tough times. The instructor decided to share the video of their interaction with the world to encourage people to allow both sons and daughters to cry when facing emotional stress and to “patiently walk them through it.”

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Let it all out

Even people who consider themselves to be “tough” need to learn that every once in awhile, it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to show emotion. It’s okay to let yourself have that moment where you just “let it all out.” Bottling up those emotions can cause health issues, anger management trouble, confusion and even depression. But recognizing those emotions, sorting through them and even showing them–whether in public or surrounded by your support team in private–can be uplifting and enlightening.

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Expressing emotions also helps you be more creative. It helps you “get over” whatever has upset you and allows you to grow and move on. Interestingly, stress-related tears also flushes your body of toxins, according to a study by Dr. William H. Frey II with the St Paul-Ramsey Medical Centre. Crying helps you come to terms with a loss, get through a stressful time and sometimes, you just feel better when you’re done.

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Crying makes you stronger

Some people believe that crying actually makes you strong. Washington Irving was quoted as saying: “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”

There’s a comical piece about when it’s okay for men in particular to cry. It notes that it’s okay on your wedding day, at the birth of your baby, at the loss of a pet or a loved one, even when your all-time favorite truck or vehicle is totalled. But the truth is, whether you’re male or female, and you feel those emotions welling up for a solidly logical reason, let it out. You’ll feel better and no one will think the less of you.

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Last Updated on February 18, 2019

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

Why It’s Never Too Late To Redefine Yourself

The ability to reinvent and redefine yourself is a bold, daring and purposeful choice. It doesn’t just happen. You have to make a conscious, intentional choice and then follow through.

If the thought of forging a new path, changing habits, thought patterns and your inner circle of friends scares you – you’re not alone. Change can be a very scary thing. It takes courage, fortitude and a bit of faith to decide to shed your old self and don a new persona. However, it is one of the most critical processes one must repeatedly endure in the pursuit of destiny. Change unlocks new levels of potential.

The Need for Change

Everyday when we wake up, we make a decision. We decide to follow our routine or we decide to go off script and shake things up a bit. For those who are creatures of habit, routine is comfortable, easy and produces very little stress. The problem with this is, after a while you stop growing.

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We all reinvent ourselves at some point in our lives. It is absolutely necessary to achieve certain levels of success.

Reflect back on who you were as a teenager and then who you were at 25. Those are two very different people. Most of us are completely different. Your thought patterns changed, your appearance, job, level of education and even your friends– changed. We like to refer to this as “growing up” or maturing and consider it to be one of life’s natural progressions. However the changes you made were purposeful and deliberate.

This process must be a lifelong and continuous cycle. You are never too old to refresh yourself.

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Happy_old_man

    Signs It’s Time to Redefine

    “Just as established products and brands need updating to stay alive and vibrant, you periodically need to refresh or reinvent yourself.”– Mireille Guiliano

    So how do you know when it’s time for a system upgrade? There are signs along the way that alert you that it is time for an overhaul. The first sign is the feeling of being stuck. If you feel like you are in a rut, you’re bored with life or you need some newness and excitement, a self reinvention may be in order. Re-evaluate your life vision and your goals. Is that vision still valid and are your goals consistent with your vision and–are they achievable? If you are off course, it’s time for a change. If you are not moving forward and making progress, it’s time for a change.

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    In life, there’s no such thing as neutrality–you’re either moving forward or you are moving backward. Time constantly moves forward and if you are standing still, you are actually losing ground. No matter your age or stage in life– there is always room for improvement.

    “You’re never too old to set another goal or dream a new dream.” ~C. S. Lewis

    The second sign that you are due for a change is the occurrence of major life events in which change is forced upon you. Getting married, starting a new job, being promoted, ending a relationship, becoming a parenting or relocating are all prime opportunities to completely overhaul your life.

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    When these major shifts occur in your life–you have to shift with them. You can’t have a single mentality and have a successful marriage. You can’t remain selfish and irresponsible, and raise a healthy, well-adjusted child. You can’t be promoted to a supervisory position and keep the same subordinate attitude. Each level of success requires something different from you.

    Aronld in Predator

      Consider, for a moment, Arnold Schwarzenegger. People may have different opinions about his character and some of his life choices, but he is a master at reinventing himself. He achieved the ultimate success as a professional body builder by earning the title “Mr. Universe” three times. He then earned a tremendous amount of fame and fortune in the entertainment industry making action/adventure films. And in his latest role, he served two terms as the Governor of California. He succeeded as a professional body builder, a film star and a politician. Each role required massive amounts of change, commitment, strength and hard work.

      And if Arnold can do it…so can you!

      Featured photo credit: BK via flickr.com

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