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You Don’t Need To Be Strong All The Time, It’s OK To Feel Weak And Cry

You Don’t Need To Be Strong All The Time, It’s OK To Feel Weak And Cry

When 9-year-old Bruce struggles to break a board during his initiation test into the Cave of Adullam Transformation Training Academy in Detroit, Michigan, he found himself briefly battling back tears, which then start to run down his cheeks.

Bruce was embarrassed, but his strong yet patient instructor kneeled down and reassured him that it’s okay to cry. It’s okay for boys and men to cry and show emotion, because life is full of challenges and tough times. The instructor decided to share the video of their interaction with the world to encourage people to allow both sons and daughters to cry when facing emotional stress and to “patiently walk them through it.”

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Let it all out

Even people who consider themselves to be “tough” need to learn that every once in awhile, it’s okay to cry. It’s okay to show emotion. It’s okay to let yourself have that moment where you just “let it all out.” Bottling up those emotions can cause health issues, anger management trouble, confusion and even depression. But recognizing those emotions, sorting through them and even showing them–whether in public or surrounded by your support team in private–can be uplifting and enlightening.

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Expressing emotions also helps you be more creative. It helps you “get over” whatever has upset you and allows you to grow and move on. Interestingly, stress-related tears also flushes your body of toxins, according to a study by Dr. William H. Frey II with the St Paul-Ramsey Medical Centre. Crying helps you come to terms with a loss, get through a stressful time and sometimes, you just feel better when you’re done.

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Crying makes you stronger

Some people believe that crying actually makes you strong. Washington Irving was quoted as saying: “There is a sacredness in tears. They are not the mark of weakness, but of power. They speak more eloquently than ten thousand tongues. They are the messengers of overwhelming grief, of deep contrition, and of unspeakable love.”

There’s a comical piece about when it’s okay for men in particular to cry. It notes that it’s okay on your wedding day, at the birth of your baby, at the loss of a pet or a loved one, even when your all-time favorite truck or vehicle is totalled. But the truth is, whether you’re male or female, and you feel those emotions welling up for a solidly logical reason, let it out. You’ll feel better and no one will think the less of you.

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Last Updated on January 21, 2020

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

How to Motivate People Around You and Inspire Them

If I was a super hero I’d want my super power to be the ability to motivate everyone around me. Think of how many problems you could solve just by being able to motivate people towards their goals. You wouldn’t be frustrated by lazy co-workers. You wouldn’t be mad at your partner for wasting the weekend in front of the TV. Also, the more people around you are motivated toward their dreams, the more you can capitalize off their successes.

Being able to motivate people is key to your success at work, at home, and in the future because no one can achieve anything alone. We all need the help of others.

So, how to motivate people? Here are 7 ways to motivate others even you can do.

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1. Listen

Most people start out trying to motivate someone by giving them a lengthy speech, but this rarely works because motivation has to start inside others. The best way to motivate others is to start by listening to what they want to do. Find out what the person’s goals and dreams are. If it’s something you want to encourage, then continue through these steps.

2. Ask Open-Ended Questions

Open-ended questions are the best way to figure out what someone’s dreams are. If you can’t think of anything to ask, start with, “What have you always wanted to do?”

“Why do you want to do that?”

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“What makes you so excited about it?”

“How long has that been your dream?”

You need this information the help you with the following steps.

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3. Encourage

This is the most important step, because starting a dream is scary. People are so scared they will fail or look stupid, many never try to reach their goals, so this is where you come in. You must encourage them. Say things like, “I think you will be great at that.” Better yet, say, “I think your skills in X will help you succeed.” For example if you have a friend who wants to own a pet store, say, “You are so great with animals, I think you will be excellent at running a pet store.”

4. Ask About What the First Step Will Be

After you’ve encouraged them, find how they will start. If they don’t know, you can make suggestions, but it’s better to let the person figure out the first step themselves so they can be committed to the process.

5. Dream

This is the most fun step, because you can dream about success. Say things like, “Wouldn’t it be cool if your business took off, and you didn’t have to work at that job you hate?” By allowing others to dream, you solidify the motivation in place and connect their dreams to a future reality.

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6. Ask How You Can Help

Most of the time, others won’t need anything from you, but it’s always good to offer. Just letting the person know you’re there will help motivate them to start. And, who knows, maybe your skills can help.

7. Follow Up

Periodically, over the course of the next year, ask them how their goal is going. This way you can find out what progress has been made. You may need to do the seven steps again, or they may need motivation in another area of their life.

Final Thoughts

By following these seven steps, you’ll be able to encourage the people around you to achieve their dreams and goals. In return, you’ll be more passionate about getting to your goals, you’ll be surrounded by successful people, and others will want to help you reach your dreams …

Oh, and you’ll become a motivational super hero. Time to get a cape!

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Featured photo credit: Thought Catalog via unsplash.com

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