Advertising
Advertising

Try These 10 Things If You Want Success In A Long Distance Relationship

Try These 10 Things If You Want Success In A Long Distance Relationship

Every relationship demands that both parties put in a lot of hard work and dedication to keep the romance alive. And a long distance relationship needs even more of that hard work and dedication which is why it can be very tricky.

The distance of hundreds or thousands of miles between the couple makes things difficult and they tend to get complicated- it certainly is not easy. However, it isn’t impossible to make long distance relationships work in this era of internet.

While it may seem like the distance will make the relationship less satisfying, knowing some simple facts and abiding by them could make the long distance relationships just as exciting and fulfilling. Here below, we’ve listed 10 things every couple in long distance relationships should work on to make the relationship work.

1. Manage time and communicate in a healthy manner.

Long distance relationships force you to communicate a lot to compensate for the distance. You’ll spend hours and hours talking and chatting. You’ll focus a lot of your time and energy on your partner as you constantly feel the necessity to communicate to keep the relationship working. But soon, you get tired and things start to look hopeless.

Know the right moments- when and how you say things matters more than how frequently you talk. Build a healthy pattern to communicate with your partner. Knowing how and when to communicate will take a great lot of pressure off the relationship and keeps it healthy.

Advertising

Proper management is the key in LDR. Know each other’s schedule and manage time in such a fashion that it drives your relationship as well as other aspects of your life side by side. Avoid excess communication since that is actually unhealthy.

2. Be open about your emotions.

It is of utmost importance to be open about your emotions in every relationship and it is more so in long distance relationships. Talk about your weaknesses just as you’d talk about your strengths.

It is easier to hide your true feelings and weakness in LDRs for the distance provides the perfect cover. But, hiding your emotions and keeping secrets could set the relationship in the course of disaster.

Since the distance will magnify any kind of tensions in a long distance relationship, it is better to talk about jealousy, envy, insecurities and be honest and transparent about everything.

3. Send each other gifts.

Everybody loves getting gifts. Gifts pretty well do their job of strengthening any relationship- they sure do work their magic in a long distance relationship as well. Send flowers, cards or any thoughtful gifts to help your partner feel loved.

Advertising

Send each other personal objects to hold on to. When you are far apart, having something tangible to remember each other by strengthens the relationship. Buy things online and have them delivered to your partner as a surprise.

4. Talk dirty.

In a long distance relationship, physical intimacy is almost off the table, so talking is all that the couple have. When you’re already talking so much about everything, talk about sex and make it dirty.

Sexual desire keeps the relationship going and reinforces trust between couples. Let your partner’s imagination run wild with provocative descriptions and sexual innuendos. You sure like seeing each other- exchange seductive selfies or even video chat if you both like making things adventurous.

After all, turning your guy on or girl for that matter from time to time is very important to keep the relationship alive. Make sure your computers don’t have any virus for obvious reasons.

5. Learn to ask good questions and listen well, get creative, and surprise your partner.

Dull conversations in long distance relationship might suggest that the flame is dying. To prevent such situations, talk about the deep stuffs that make you think and help you understand each other better. Listen carefully and ask good questions. Things get boring sometimes, acknowledge that, but just don’t be so lame that your partner might start to question the relationship.

Advertising

Learn about her/his interests and get creative to surprise them from time to time. Find good topics before you start chatting or talking. Sing to each other on telephone or video chats, write songs or poems about your partner if that is your thing. Make them feel special with words.

6. Do things together.

Doing things together like movies, dinners, and dates might not be achievable in a long distance relationship but still there are plenty of things you can do together online. Watch movie at the same time and talk about it immediately afterwards.

Play online games together. Read books and articles online, recommend them to each other. Designate date nights and video chat, listen to music, sing together, dance for each other. Do things and laugh together. It really helps to keep the relationship going.

7. Try writing letters and long emails to each other.

Letters and emails offer you that precious time to think and express yourself in the best way possible to your partner than when you’re texting or talking over the telephone. The joy and excitement when you find a letter from your lover in your mailbox is a hundred times stronger than when you get a text on your cellphone.

Write long emails to reflect on any tricky issues you might have in the relationship. Besides, emails and letters can be treasured for the future- who knows your long distance love story could make a great book later where your letters and emails would make exciting reads.

Advertising

 8. Learn to manage your emotions and expectations.

There are times of excitement and joy when your great expectations come true. But also, long distance relationships come with more room for jealousy, envy, doubts, fear and ups and downs. And they are easily magnified, if not taken care of properly.

Approaches like cutting off communication and giving the silent treatment make things extremely difficult in long distance relationships. The best approach is to understand the situation and talk to each other about managing your emotions and expectations together. Recognizing your emotions and managing your expectations pays off big time.

9. Spend time with friends and family outside the relationship.

People in long distance relationships may develop tendencies to turn inwards after spending so much time without their partner. Lonelier times could be difficult to cope with and social situations might become awkward for them. The long distance relationship takes its toll on the lovers that way.

Understand that you have a life where you are at the moment. Don’t cut off your friends and families from your life, spend time with them. Involve yourself in other things of your liking. The secret is to keep yourself healthy, so that you can keep your relationship healthy.

10. Visit your partner as often as possible.

Visit your partner as often as possible. Nothing else can parallel the joy and happiness of meeting each other in person, not even the gifts or letters. If you haven’t yet met each other and are limited to talking and interacting online, it’s wiser to meet as soon as possible.

It could be that the chemistry you have online might not be there when you are together in person. Find that out as soon as possible. Schedule meetings before hand and save up for your trips.

Featured photo credit: Pixabay via pixabay.com

More by this author

Nabin Paudyal

Co-Founder, Siplikan Media Group

Here’s Why Writing Down Your Goals Really Does Work Think Positive Mantras Help a Lot? Try Value Affirmation Instead 20 Healthy Spaghetti Squash Recipes For Delicious Comfort Food Benefits of Sauna: 8 Ways It Makes You Healthier and Happier 25 Websites Other Than Social Media To Upgrade Your Life

Trending in Communication

1 How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide) 2 The Hidden Power of Every Single Person Around You 3 The Purpose Of Friendship: The Only 4 Types Of Friends You Need In Life 4 14 Things That Make You Happy and Enjoy Life More 5 Focus On Yourself, Because Most Of The Time No One Really Cares

Read Next

Advertising
Advertising
Advertising

Last Updated on April 19, 2021

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

Expressing Anger

Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

Being Passive-Aggressive

This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

Advertising

Poorly-Timed

Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

Ongoing Anger

Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

Healthy Ways to Express Anger

What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

Being Honest

Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

Being Direct

Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

Advertising

Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

Being Timely

When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

How to Deal With Anger

If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

1. Slow Down

From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

Advertising

When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

2. Focus on the “I”

Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

3. Work out

When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

4. Seek Help When Needed

There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

Advertising

5. Practice Relaxation

We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

6. Laugh

Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

7. Be Grateful

It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

Final Thoughts

Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

More Resources on Anger Management

Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

Reference

Read Next