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12 Uncomfortable Feelings That Tell You’re On The Right Track

12 Uncomfortable Feelings That Tell You’re On The Right Track

No matter what stage you are at in your life, it is important that you feel you are on the right track to achieve your individual goals. The problem is that many of us experience feelings of fear and discomfort as we grow and evolve as individuals, and there is a tendency to mistake these emotions for symptoms of unhappiness or discontentment.

As a result of this, we may instinctively pull back from the precipice and attempt to deal with issues that simply do not exist, rather than embracing these unsettling emotions and understanding that they are the mere embodiment of change. Once we achieve the latter, we can continue to pursue our goals with tenacity and success.

12 Uncomfortable Thoughts, Feelings and Emotions that Indicate you are on the right track

To help understand this in greater detail, let’s take a look at the feelings and emotions that are clear indicators of positive change and personal progression. These include: –

1. Realising that you are the only Person responsible for your Life and Happiness

As you make strides to improve yourself and your lifestyle, you will quickly come to the realisation that you and you alone are responsible for your future happiness. This type of emotional autonomy is extremely daunting, while it can also create an incredible amount of pressure that weighs heavily on your shoulders. Despite this, learning to embrace this feeling as a symbol of growth is the first step towards future attainment.

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2. Feeling Lost and Directionless

Often, the sense of feeling lost or directionless is mistaken for a symbol of depression, but in fact the opposite may be true. Instead, it indicates that you are becoming more present in your life, as you begin to consider alternative narratives and opportunities outside of the premeditated restrictions that you have previously placed on yourself. So although this makes you feel as though you are directionless, you are actively reconsidering the future paths are open to you in the future.

3. Experiencing disrupted and Unpredictable sleeping patterns

As you begin to consider these brand new narratives, you will find that your mind may become overly busy and cluttered. This can trigger disrupted and largely unpredictable sleeping patterns, which will either see you experience a shortage or an excess of sleep, as your mind constantly races with thoughts and opportunities.

I found this prior to embarking on an an internship in Thailand back in 2012, as countries economy and income levels boomed. Preoccupied with the opportunities and experiences that awaited me, I struggled to sleep at all and realised that this was typical when taking risks in life and pushing the boundaries of personal development.

4. Enjoying Intense and Vivid Dreams

Similarly, the sleep that you do enjoy will be distinguished by intense and vivid dreaming, the details of which you can almost always recall in detail. Given that these dreams are often the manifestation of your subconscious thoughts, this would suggest that your mind is overwhelmed by compelling and often contrasting narratives. The intensity of your dreams often reflect the depth or the nature of your thoughts, so while this can be unsettling it is usually and indication that you on the precipice of change or evolution.

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5. Struggling to focus or concentrate

Once again, this sensation is often attributed to feelings of being lost or out of touch with those around you, but it may actually relate to the deployment of alternative brain functions. As we begin to act on intuition and engage the creative and emotional aspects of our mind, for example, we utilise the right hemisphere of our brains accordingly. This can interrupt left brain functions such as focusing and remembering small details, creating muddled thinking and significant confusion.

Rather than being a cause for concern, however, this is an indication of an opening and expanding mind.

6. Having Random and Irrational Feelings

This is commonly believed to be an indicator of angst and instability, but this is not necessarily the case. Irrational outbursts of anger or sadness simply reflects the fact that you have feelings that need to be recognised, so that you can subsequently overcome them and the emotional barriers that they relate to. In fact, the outbursts usually occur because you are grappling with these feelings rather than allowing them to enter your conscious and taking the necessary steps to resolving them. In this respect, these feelings are little more than signs that you identifying and working through issues.

7. Burdening an Intense desire to be alone

When we have the desire to isolate ourselves from others, we tend to do so in the belief that we are feeling depressed. Being disenchanted with socialising and the idea of absorbing other people’s problems is merely an indication that you are entering a period of self-reflection, however, as you re-calibrate your mind and begin to internalise your focus. This is something to be welcomed, as it means that you addressing your own problems and empowering your mind for the challenges that lie ahead.

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8. Feeling as though you are reliving your childhood issues

If you have experienced emotional struggles or issues during your childhood, the chances are that you these will continue to reoccur until they are dealt with. While this type of mental and behavioural cycle is often considered to be a negative thing, it simply means that you are becoming increasingly conscious of the triggers that impact on your thoughts, actions and emotions. As a result, such feelings will ultimately make it easy to identify issues and resolve them for the better.

9. Being fearful when you step outside of your Comfort Zone

Whenever we are about to undertake a new and exciting challenge, you are bound to be struck by an unmistakable sense of fear and uncertainty. These strike at the very core of your belief and self-confidence, forcing some to seek flight in the belief that they are not capable of meeting the challenge head-on. This is simply an instinctive reaction to stepping outside of your comfort zone and embracing the unfamiliar; however, while it is also a clear indication that you are opening your mind and on the right track.

10. Being Unsure of who you really are

We all have times where we become unsure of ourselves, particularly during times of change or hardship. Rather than being an indication that you are suffering from a decline in confidence or self-esteem, this simply an indication that you are evolving as an individual and undergoing the type of self-improvement that is integral to growth. Quite simply, the person that you know and recognise is changing, while any past illusions about who you feel as though you should be are being debunked. Although this can be an uncomfortable process, this type of uncertainty is logical as your values, belief systems and goals change over time.

11. Recognising how far you have to go in your Journey

There is an old Chinese proverb which suggests that even when you are are 90% of the way along a particular path, you are no more than halfway towards your desired destination. This captures the difficulty of taming the final 10%, and it is embodied in the sense fear that you experience as you encounter significant growth and progression.

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So when you recognise how far you still have to go to achieve your goals and become a little disheartened, this is actually a reflection of how far you have already come as an individual. Suddenly, you can see where you are headed in life, as you edge closer to realising your dreams and becoming the person you want to be.

12. Being empowered to speak up for and defend yourself

As you grow, you may also develop an intense desire to defend yourself and speak up to those who question you. This innate sense of anger evolves as you achieve more in life and become a more assured individual, as the idea of being walked over or disrespected becomes increasingly unpalatable. So rather than allowing other, more dominant voices to constantly overwhelm your will, you stand your ground and showcase far great conviction in your own beliefs and values.

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Last Updated on August 6, 2020

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

6 Reasons Why You Should Think Before You Speak

We’ve all done it. That moment when a series of words slithers from your mouth and the instant regret manifests through blushing and profuse apologies. If you could just think before you speak! It doesn’t have to be like this, and with a bit of practice, it’s actually quite easy to prevent.

“Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another.” – Napolean Hill

Are we speaking the same language?

My mum recently left me a note thanking me for looking after her dog. She’d signed it with “LOL.” In my world, this means “laugh out loud,” and in her world it means “lots of love.” My kids tell me things are “sick” when they’re good, and ”manck” when they’re bad (when I say “bad,” I don’t mean good!). It’s amazing that we manage to communicate at all.

When speaking, we tend to color our language with words and phrases that have become personal to us, things we’ve picked up from our friends, families and even memes from the internet. These colloquialisms become normal, and we expect the listener (or reader) to understand “what we mean.” If you really want the listener to understand your meaning, try to use words and phrases that they might use.

Am I being lazy?

When you’ve been in a relationship for a while, a strange metamorphosis takes place. People tend to become lazier in the way that they communicate with each other, with less thought for the feelings of their partner. There’s no malice intended; we just reach a “comfort zone” and know that our partners “know what we mean.”

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Here’s an exchange from Psychology Today to demonstrate what I mean:

Early in the relationship:

“Honey, I don’t want you to take this wrong, but I’m noticing that your hair is getting a little thin on top. I know guys are sensitive about losing their hair, but I don’t want someone else to embarrass you without your expecting it.”

When the relationship is established:

“Did you know that you’re losing a lot of hair on the back of your head? You’re combing it funny and it doesn’t help. Wear a baseball cap or something if you feel weird about it. Lots of guys get thin on top. It’s no big deal.”

It’s pretty clear which of these statements is more empathetic and more likely to be received well. Recognizing when we do this can be tricky, but with a little practice it becomes easy.

Have I actually got anything to say?

When I was a kid, my gran used to say to me that if I didn’t have anything good to say, I shouldn’t say anything at all. My gran couldn’t stand gossip, so this makes total sense, but you can take this statement a little further and modify it: “If you don’t have anything to say, then don’t say anything at all.”

A lot of the time, people speak to fill “uncomfortable silences,” or because they believe that saying something, anything, is better than staying quiet. It can even be a cause of anxiety for some people.

When somebody else is speaking, listen. Don’t wait to speak. Listen. Actually hear what that person is saying, think about it, and respond if necessary.

Am I painting an accurate picture?

One of the most common forms of miscommunication is the lack of a “referential index,” a type of generalization that fails to refer to specific nouns. As an example, look at these two simple phrases: “Can you pass me that?” and “Pass me that thing over there!”. How often have you said something similar?

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How is the listener supposed to know what you mean? The person that you’re talking to will start to fill in the gaps with something that may very well be completely different to what you mean. You’re thinking “pass me the salt,” but you get passed the pepper. This can be infuriating for the listener, and more importantly, can create a lack of understanding and ultimately produce conflict.

Before you speak, try to label people, places and objects in a way that it is easy for any listeners to understand.

What words am I using?

It’s well known that our use of nouns and verbs (or lack of them) gives an insight into where we grew up, our education, our thoughts and our feelings.

Less well known is that the use of pronouns offers a critical insight into how we emotionally code our sentences. James Pennebaker’s research in the 1990’s concluded that function words are important keys to someone’s psychological state and reveal much more than content words do.

Starting a sentence with “I think…” demonstrates self-focus rather than empathy with the speaker, whereas asking the speaker to elaborate or quantify what they’re saying clearly shows that you’re listening and have respect even if you disagree.

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Is the map really the territory?

Before speaking, we sometimes construct a scenario that makes us act in a way that isn’t necessarily reflective of the actual situation.

A while ago, John promised to help me out in a big way with a project that I was working on. After an initial meeting and some big promises, we put together a plan and set off on its execution. A week or so went by, and I tried to get a hold of John to see how things were going. After voice mails and emails with no reply and general silence, I tried again a week later and still got no response.

I was frustrated and started to get more than a bit vexed. The project obviously meant more to me than it did to him, and I started to construct all manner of crazy scenarios. I finally got through to John and immediately started a mild rant about making promises you can’t keep. He stopped me in my tracks with the news that his brother had died. If I’d have just thought before I spoke…

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