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How to Become More of A People Person at Work

How to Become More of A People Person at Work

Interpersonal skills are critical in any workplace environment, and effective communication is important both on the personal and corporate levels. However, if you’re not naturally an outgoing people person, building relationships with colleagues can be difficult. Simply going into the break room to heat up your lunch can stress you out.

Luckily, as an article in Fast Company pointed out, there’s no such thing as a pure introvert or pure extrovert. We all have the ability to adapt to the situation and learn the communication skills we need to succeed. And while it can be scary to step outside of your comfort zone, the relationships you have with your co-workers can improve your productivity and satisfaction in your current job, as well as become an important part of your professional network for the future.

If interpersonal skills are not your forte, check these 5 tips to strengthen them at the office.

1. Work for an organization that you believe in and are confident about.

One of the hardest parts about interacting with people is finding common ground that makes it easier for you to connect. If you work for a company that you truly believe in, that’s a great starting point from which to build a relationship with co-workers. Knowing that you share an interest in the work you’re doing with those around you will make it easier to communicate with them.

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Most people automatically become more open and talkative when they’re discussing something they’re passionate about, and that enthusiasm is often contagious. Not only is it personally rewarding to share what you love, but this will also make you seem like more of a positive, upbeat individual. And your co-workers will enjoy your company more because of that.

If you feel your work isn’t something you’d feel excited telling someone else about, consider altering your career path. Useful tools like career exploration apps can help you figure out whether or not you’re in the right field, as well as learn about all the options available to you.

2. Keep your home and work lives separate.

There are few things more awkward or depressing than when a co-worker insists on bringing their home troubles into the office. There’s a thin line between telling your work friends about what you did over the weekend and the laundry list of things that are stressing you out.

Don’t make those around you uncomfortable by oversharing your personal life at work. While those types of conversations might feel cathartic to you, they can be distracting for everyone else. Additionally, they may cause others to avoid interacting with you out of fear of awkward situations. Leaving your home life behind when you go to the office will help you focus on work and be a more approachable colleague.

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3. Have balanced conversations.

There’s nothing worse than being cornered by a co-worker and having them go on and on about their idea without leaving you room to get a word in edgewise. Don’t be that person. Remember, a conversation is a two-way street. Communication isn’t just about talking; it’s also about listening.

Whether you’re interacting with a co-worker one-on-one or in a group, do your part to ensure everyone’s ideas are being heard. Ask questions and don’t be afraid to bring others into the conversation by saying “I’d like to hear what you have to say about this,” in order to get quieter people involved. This will help improve productivity and efficiency when brainstorming.

Also remember that this is important for more casual conversations as well. Nobody likes a know-it-all. Even if you have seen every episode of Game of Thrones, read all the books, and investigated every fan theory, other people deserve to speak up about the topic. Take a step back every now and again, and let others talk about their interests or opinions.

4. Set socializing goals for yourself.

For people who aren’t naturally outgoing, it can seem daunting to put yourself out there. However, if this a professional goal of yours, you need to make it a priority to mingle with your co-workers on a regular basis.

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Start small. Go to the break room twice a week for five minutes and strike up a conversation with whoever is there. Ask them about a project they’re working on or take the chance to thank them for something they helped you out on earlier in the week. You’re just trying to break the ice, so don’t stress out if you run out of things to talk about quickly. The key is baby steps.

From there, build up to weekly happy hours or team lunches to improve your social skills. Since these are longer events, it’ll require more interaction. However, because there will be multiple people there, you can make the rounds without putting too much pressure on yourself to talk with one person for an extended period of time.

5. Be mindful of your tone and body language.

The messages we send out to others aren’t purely defined by our words. Your tone and body language can also speak volumes. A variety of research reported on in Forbes found that everything from a smile to better posture can help you develop better relationships in the workplace.

Pay attention to co-workers who you view as confident and likeable. Do they stand up straight? How well do they maintain eye contact? Do they use certain words or tones that make them particularly effective communicators? Try to incorporate those things into your body language. Don’t stand or say things that seem unnatural to you, but practice in front of a mirror so you can improve your stance, movement, and tone in a way that’s natural to you.

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Your co-workers can play an important part in your professional success. They can be there to help you when you’re facing a problem or inspire you to work harder. But in order to develop those relationships, you have to focus on improving your interpersonal skills.

What are some other ways to become more of a people person? Share in the comments below!

Featured photo credit: unsplash.com via pexels.com

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Last Updated on September 20, 2018

How to Be Happy at Work and Find Fulfillment in Your Career

How to Be Happy at Work and Find Fulfillment in Your Career

If you’re going to spend 1/3 of our life at work, you should enjoy it, right?

Trust me, I know that’s easier said than done. Difficult coworkers, less-than-desirable tasks, or even just being in the wrong position can all lead to a lack of enjoyment and fulfillment in your work.

But what if I told you it doesn’t have to be this way? Or better yet, if you struggle with all of the above (and then some), what if I told you that enjoying your work and finding fulfillment regardless of those obstacles is possible?

Don’t believe me? I don’t blame you because I was there too. Before implementing the tips below, I struggled to get through each day, much less find real fulfillment, in the office. Now, even after the toughest days on the job, I still come away with feelings of pride, accomplishment, and fulfillment. The best news is, so can you.

If you’re ready to make those hours count and find happiness and fulfillment in the office, then read on to find out how to be happy at work and find fulfillment in your career:

1. Discover the root(s) of the problem

For this first step, we’ll need to think back to 8th-grade physics (humor me). We all know Newton’s 3rd law, “for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.” When you think about it, the same can be said outside of physics, and we see this law play out in our daily lives, day after day.

Simply put, all the issues we deal with in the office (and life in general) affect us in a noticeable way.

If you’re appreciated at work, like the work you do and receive frequent praise, promotions, or raises, then this will probably have an altogether positive effect on your life in the office.

But what if we reverse this? What if you feel under appreciated, get passed up for promotions, or get denied raises? This is sure to affect the way you feel at work on a negative level.

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So, before you can implement the steps of feeling happy and fulfilled at work, we first have to discover the reasons why you don’t feel that way already.

Think about it, write a list, or make a mental note. Run through all the reasons you’re dissatisfied in the office, and don’t hold back. Knowing the exact obstacles you’re facing will make overcoming them that much easier.

In fact, as a side-challenge to this article, I recommend picking the top three reasons contributing to your dissatisfaction at work and using the following tips to tackle them.

2. Practice gratitude for an instant uplift

Did you know the simple act of feeling grateful can increase your happiness and make you more fulfilled at work?[1]

Well, it’s true, and it’s scientifically proven.

Dr. Lisa Firestone notes that practicing gratitude “reminds us of what we lacked in the past.” Meaning, it serves as both a boost to happiness and a bit of a wake-up call that things have been or could be, much worse.

Trying to conjure up feelings of gratitude can seem almost impossible when your work situation seems bleak, but hear me out: There are incredibly easy ways to get started and it doesn’t involve trying to “force” yourself to feel grateful about things that stress you out.

For an instant pick-me-up, try this:

Find a loose piece of paper, a blank sticky note, or anything you can write on, be it physical or digital. List just three things that you are absolutely without-a-doubt thankful for in your life.

Now here’s the trick: Don’t just list what you’re grateful for, you have to list why you’re grateful for them, too.

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For example, simply saying “I’m grateful for my kids” will probably make you feel good, sure, but what if we could amplify the warm, fuzzy feeling into real, lasting motivation?

Instead, write the reason you’re so thankful for your children. Is it because they make you laugh and forget about other stressors? Or maybe they help to remind you of why you go to work every day in the first place?

Whatever your reasons may be, jot them down and keep your list somewhere you can see it while you work. A quick glance at your gratitude list throughout the day can provide powerful, positive motivation to keep going.

Bonus:

If you can find just three things to be thankful for that specifically relate to your job, and list why those things make you grateful, your list can also help you find fulfillment in your work itself which can give you an even bigger boost of positivity throughout the day.

3. Take meaningful time for yourself

We all know creating a strong work-life balance can be crucial to feeling satisfied in our jobs, but rarely do we ever address how we’re spending our time outside of work.

Many of us survive a 9-hour work day and commute home only to find ourselves busy with our personal to-do lists, running a household, and taking care of a child (or 2 or 3, and so on).

If you spend all your time working, whether in the office or within your household, you’re going to feel drained at some point. This is why setting meaningful time for yourself every day is highly important.

Look, I get it: I don’t know anyone in the working world who can shun all responsibility for a 3-movie marathon or happy hour with friends whenever they feel like it. But finding time for yourself, be it just 30 minutes to an hour, can really make a difference in how you feel at work.

This works because you’ll have time to actually relax and let the day’s stress melt away while you enjoy something just for you. The to-do lists and stressors will still be there after you’re refreshed and ready to tackle them.

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No time for me-time? Try this:

If you have a busy household, you’ll need to capitalize on a block of time you know will be completely uninterrupted. The easiest way to do this: try waking up 30 minutes to an hour earlier than usual (or push bedtime back an hour if you’re a night owl, like me) and take time to do something you enjoy.

This could be reading with a cup of tea, catching up on Facebook, spending time on a passion project—anything! As long as it’s meaningful to you, it works!

Bonus:

Starting your day with meaningful time for yourself can set you up to have a positive mood that lasts well into office hours, and having your me-time in the evening can give you something positive to look forward to during the day.

4. Get productive and feel accomplished

Don’t you just love the feeling of checking the last item off of a hefty to-do list? That’s because self-motivation can be a huge driver of positivity and success.

When we accomplish something, no matter how small, it makes us feel good, plain and simple. Applying this tactic to your daily work can be the motivator you need to find fulfillment during the daily office grind.

While there are tons of steps to get more done at work, I’ll share my personal favorite: Prioritizing.

Now, many people handle prioritizing differently. Some like to tackle the little tasks first so they can spend focused time on the big to-dos. Others like to knock out the big items first and get to the smaller ones when they can.

No matter which camp you’re in, you may be missing one crucial step: Time management.

So how’s this work? When you factor in the amount of time your priorities will take, it can transform your productivity ten-fold.

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Say you have three top priorities for the day. You might jump into the smaller ones or the bigger ones depending on your preferred method, and then find yourself out of time and bringing work home with you at the end of the day.

This is prevented when you factor in time. Knowing how long each item will take, or deliberately setting specific blocks of time for your priorities can help you accomplish more in the same 8-9 (or 12) hours that you typically spend at work.

Try this:

Take a look at your priorities and consider how long they should take. Pop into your Google calendar (or Filofax, whatever works for you) and schedule time to work on your priority items around any important meetings or events of the day.

The most important thing to remember is to stick to your dedicated time.

Often, when we know exactly how long we have to work on something (and honor this time limit), we’re motivated to get more done on time to avoid taking work home at the end of the day.

The bottom line

There’s no need to waste 1/3 of our lives feeling unsatisfied at work. Luckily, you now have the tools to get started, take back your time, and become happy and fulfilled at work again.

The only question is — which tip will you try first?

Featured photo credit: Ellyot via unsplash.com

Reference

[1]Psychology Today: The Healing Power of Gratitude

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