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What To Tell Yourself After Turning 25

What To Tell Yourself After Turning 25

Turning 25 is special. Halfway through your twenties and now establishing yourself as an adult, you will be starting to get a firm idea of who you are and the kind of life you want to lead. Here are eight important things to remember as you enter the last few years before turning 30.

1. Don’t settle for less than you deserve

One of life’s most important lessons is that everyone deserves to feel safe, to be happy, and to have a chance to pursue their dreams. Never let yourself believe that you are in some way unworthy of the most fundamental rights to which everyone is entitled. You are just good as anyone else. Do not allow yourself to be satisfied with mediocre jobs, relationships and experiences if you want more from life.

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2. Let go of relationships that do not make you happy

Sometimes we are tempted to stay in unhealthy relationships. This can either be a relationship that is overtly toxic (for example, when domestic violence is involved) or soul-destroying in a more subtle way (for example, your partner may rarely want to go out, or show little interest in your hopes and dreams). If you truly want to be happy, as well as liberating the other party to find someone to whom they are better suited, end such relationships as quickly and gracefully as possible.

3. Focus on self-improvement as a key priority

Women are often taught to put other people before themselves. Whilst this is positive in that they are trained to avoid being selfish, the result is often a reluctance to put sufficient energy into self-improvement. However, the fact remains that you are going to be your only consistent companion over time. Bearing this in mind, isn’t it worth taking the time and effort to invest in yourself? It’s fine to encourage others and help them reach their full potential, but never overlook yourself. If you want or need to learn new skills or work for that promotion, do it!

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4. Embrace challenges, don’t panic

When you decide to work for anything important or special in life, you will face challenges along the way. A major secret to success in life is to change your attitude to challenges. Rather than see them as annoyances or problems with the power to overwhelm you, embrace them as an opportunity to learn new skills and pick up memorable experiences. When you reach your goal, your victory will be even sweeter if you had to battle for what you wanted.

5. Work on caring less about what other people think

By your mid-twenties, you will have realized that everybody you come across has an opinion to share, and that their opinions may not be worth listening to! By all means ask for opinions or advice from those you respect, but an important part of living successfully as an independent adult is to look to yourself first when making decisions. You cannot afford to care too much about judgements other people may be making. No-one knows you and your life better than you do. Act accordingly.

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6. Practice the art of saying ‘No’

If you have a habit of trying to please everyone by accepting every invitation or request thrown at you, then you need to learn how to say ‘No.’ If you are overwhelmed or overburdened, then say so. It is unreasonable for others to expect you to shoulder more than your fair share of work, whether in an office or in a relationship. If someone reacts badly to a polite, reasonable ‘No’ then that’s their problem, not yours.

7. Care for yourself and care for your parents

One of the most important assets in life is your health, so be sure to take care of yourself by following a good diet and exercise regimen. Your parents will also be starting to enter their senior years, so make sure you keep an eye on their health. This isn’t to say you should assume responsibility for their wellbeing, but bear in mind that they may need a little extra help and support in the coming years.

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8. Cut toxic people out of your life

Toxic people are those individuals who drain you, depress you, and bring you down. They tend to be negative rather than positive, and they deserve no place in your life. Whilst it may be tempting to try and help negative people or get sucked into their downbeat conversations, you need to put your own wellbeing first. If you have realized that certain people make you feel ‘low’ or unhappy, now is the time to gradually cut contact with them. Otherwise you will waste precious time trying to raise their spirits, and feel your own lowering in the process!

At the age of 25 you still have a long way to go in life but you have all the experience you need to start taking full responsibility for yourself. Remind yourself of the eight points above and get ready to lead a life that is healthy, happy and satisfying.

More by this author

Jay Hill

Freelance Writer

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Last Updated on April 11, 2019

How to Improve Communication Skills for Workplace Success

How to Improve Communication Skills for Workplace Success

Possessing strong communication skills will help you in every phase of your life. This is especially true in the workplace.

I have personally worked with several leaders who were masters of communication. A few were wonderful speakers who could tell a great story and get everyone in the room engaged. Those of us in attendance would walk away feeling inspired and eager to help with what came next. Others were very skilled at sharing a clear direction and job expectations.

I knew exactly what was expected of me and how to achieve my goals. This was the foundation of an energized and vibrant role I was in. What I have found is strong communication skills are incredibly helpful and sometimes critical in how well we perform at work.

Here we will take a look at how to improve communication skills for workplace success.

How Communication Skills Help Your Success

Strong communication skills pave the way for success in many ways. Let’s look at a few of the big ones.

Create a Positive Experience

Here are two examples of how well developed communication skills helps create a positive experience:

When I first moved to the city I now live in, I began a job search. Prior to my first live interview, I was told an address to go to. Upon arriving at the address provided, I drove around and around attempting to find the location. After 15 minutes of circling and looking for the address, I finally grabbed a parking spot and set out on foot.

What I discovered was the address was actually down an alley and only had the number over the door. No sign for the actual company. The person that gave me those very unclear directions provided a bad experience for me.

Had they communicated the directions to get there in a clear manner, my experience would have been much better. Instead the entire experience started off poorly and colored the entire meeting.

As a recruiter, I frequently provide potential candidates with information about a job I’m speaking to them about. In order to do this, I also provide a picture of the overall company, the group they might be joining, and how their role fits in and impacts the entire company.

Time and time again I have been told by candidates that I have provided the clearest picture of a company and role they have ever heard. They have a positive experience when I clearly communicate to them. Even when the position does not work out for them, often times they will want to stay in touch with me due to the open communication and beneficial experience they had during the interviewing process.

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Strong communication skills will provide a positive experience in virtually any interaction you have with someone.

Help Leadership Skills

It’s certainly a skill all its own to be able to lead others.

Being a mentor and guiding others towards success is a major hallmark of great leaders. Another characteristic of effective leaders is the ability to communicate clearly.

As I referenced above, having a leader who can plainly articulate the company’s mission and direction goes a really long way towards being the Captain of the boat that others want to follow. It’s like saying “here’s our destination and this is how we are going to get there” in a way that everyone can get on board with.

Another critical component of everyone helping to sail the boat in the right direction is knowing what your portion is all about. How are you helping the boat move towards its destination in the manner than is consistent with the leaders’ vision?

If you have a boss or a manager that can show you what it takes for not only you to be successful, but also how your performance helps the company’s success then you’ve got a winner. A boss with superior communication skills.

Build Better Teams

Most of us work in teams of some sort or another. During the course of my career, I have led teams up to 80 and also been an individual contributor.

In my individual contributor roles, I have been part of a larger team. Even if you are in business for yourself, you have to interact with others in one manner or another.

If you have strong communication skills, it helps to build better teams. This is true whether you are in an IT department with 100 other fellow programmers or if you own your own business and have customers or vendors you communicate with.

When you showcase your robust ability to communicate well with others while interacting with them, you are building a better team.

Now let’s jump in to how to improve communication skills to help you pave the way for your workplace success.

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How to Improve Communication Skills for Workplace Success

There are many tips, tricks, and techniques to improve communication skills. I don’t want to overwhelm you with too much information, so let’s focus on the things that will provide the biggest return on your time investment.

Most of these tips will be fairly easy to become aware of but will take time and effort to implement. So let’s go!

1. Listen

Ever heard the saying you have two ears and one mouth for a reason? If you haven’t, then here’s the reason:

Being a good listener is half the equation to being a good communicator.

People who have the ability to really listen to someone can then actually answer questions in a meaningful way. If you don’t make the effort to actively listen, then you are really doing yourself and the other person a disservice in the communication department.

Know that person who is chomping at the bit to open his or her mouth the second you stop talking? Don’t be that person. They haven’t listened to at least 1/2 of what you’ve said. Therefore the words that spill out of their mouth are going to be about 1/2 relevant to what you just said.

Listen to someone completely and be comfortable with short periods of silence. Work on your listening skills first and foremost.

2. Know Your Audience

Knowing your audience is another critical component to having strong communication skills. The way you interact with your manager should be different than how you interact with your kids. This isn’t to say you need to be a different person with everyone you interact with. Far from it.

Here is a good way to think about it:

Imagine using your the same choice of words and body language you use with your spouse while interacting with your boss. That puts things in a graphic light!

You want to ensure you are using the type of communication most relevant to your audience.

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3. Minimize

I have lunch with a business associate about 3 times a year. We’ve been talking for several years now about putting a business deal together.

He is one of those people that simply overwhelms others with a lot of words. Sometimes when I ask him a question, I get buried beneath such an avalanche of words that I’m more confused than when I asked the question. Needless to say this is most likely a large portion of why we never put the deal together.

Don’t be like my lunch business associate. The goal of talking to or communicating with someone is to share actual information. The goal is not to confuse someone, it’s to provide clarity in many cases.

State what needs to be stated as succinctly as possible. That doesn’t mean you can’t have some pleasant conversation about the weather too.

The point is to not create such an onslaught of words and information that the other person walks away more confused than when they started.

4. Over Communicate

So this probably sounds completely counter intuitive to what I just wrote about minimizing your communication. It seems like it might be but it’s not.

What I mean by over communicating is ensuring that the other person understands the important parts of what you are sharing with them. This can be done simply yet effectively. Here’s a good example:

Most companies have open enrollment for benefits for the employees in the fall. The company I work for has open enrollment from November 1 to 15. The benefits department will send out a communication to all employees around October 1st, letting them know open enrollment is right around the corner and any major changes that year. There’s also a phone number and email for people to contact them with any questions.

Two weeks later, we all get a follow up email with basically the same information. We get a 3rd communication the week before open enrollment and another one 1 day before it starts.

Finally we get 2 emails during enrollment reminding us when open enrollment ends.

There’s minimal information, it’s more of a reminder. This is effective over communication.

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5. Body Language

The final critical component to how to improve communication skills for workplace success is body language. This is something most of us have heard about before but, a reminder is probably a good idea.

When I am in a meeting with someone I am comfortable with, I tend to kind of slouch down in my chair and cross my arms. When I catch myself doing this, I sit up straight and uncross my arms. I remember that crossing arms can many times be interpreted as a sign of disagreement or conflict.

In general, the best rule of thumb is to work towards having open body language whenever possible at work. This means relaxing your posture, not crossing your arms, and looking people in the eye when speaking with them.

When you are speaking in front of others, stand up straight and speak in a clear voice. This will convey confidence in your words.

Conclusion

Possessing strong communication skills will help you in many facets of your life and most certainly in the workplace.

Good communication helps create better teams, positive experiences with those we interact with, and are critical for leadership.

There are numerous tactics and techniques to be used to improve communication skills. Here we’ve reviewed how to improve communication skills for workplace success.

Now go communicate your way to success.

More Resources About Effective Communication

Featured photo credit: HIVAN ARVIZU via unsplash.com

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