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100 Ways To Calm Yourself When Life Is Getting Tough

100 Ways To Calm Yourself When Life Is Getting Tough

“I think that, for most of us, there are times in life when it all just feels like Too Much.” – Therapist, Annie Wright

Life isn’t always easy. There may be times when you stumble and struggle through the day; times when you feel like you’ve had enough. Circumstances where you feel totally overwhelmed. Occasions when you feel sad, depressed, angry or even unloved.

Sometimes, there maybe no apparent reason for these feelings. Other times, they may stem from obvious reasons such as being heartbroken, suffering from anxiety or even a mental illness. It’s okay! We are only human after all. We feel. It’s a part of who we are.

When you feel that life is tough, here are 100 ways to calm yourself, restore the inner peace and make yourself happy. It’s often the simple things in life, that make all the difference.

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    #1 Be Generous. Give something to a total stranger. Acts of giving make us feel warm and fuzzy inside.

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      #2 Sit in a coffee shop or a busy street and soak up your surroundings. You don’t have to talk to people.

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        #3 On the flip side, if being around people is feeling too much for you. Go home. Relax.

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          #4 Practice self-love. Each day remind yourself that you are a strong, beautiful person, with a lot to offer.

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            #5 Educate yourself: research what it is you are experiencing. Arm yourself with knowledge and the resources to tackle the problems head on.

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              #6 Preparation: Write the day’s to-do list the evening before.

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                #7  Create a dream sanctuary; surround yourself with inspirational quotes and positivity. You can use your laptop and create a folder dedicated to this.

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                  #8 Strengths: Write down a list of 20 of your strengths. [ good communicator, empathetic etc.]

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                    #9 Keep going forward. Keep taking small steps, no matter what. Being stagnant doesn’t serve you. Are you looking to start a business? What steps can you take each day to make that dream a reality.

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                      #10 Walk: Walking helps clear your mind. It offers you a different perspective.

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                        #11 Indulge. Take a day off to spend a whole day doing exactly what you want. Eat what you want. Watch series. Go wild.

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                          #12 Cry: Release all that emotion. You will feel better.

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                            #13 Talk: Call or meet someone in person to chat about problems.

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                              #14 Re-visit an old hobby. If you don’t have one, create one. Paint. Read. Sculpt. Gardening.

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                                #15 Prioritize: Decide what’s important right now. Say no to extra obligations.

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                                  #16 Alleviate pressure: Reduce expectations of yourself and others.

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                                    #17 Sleep: Get enough rest. Sleep 7-9 hours each night.

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                                      #18 Nap: Give yourself a break. Afternoon naps have been shown to increase creativity.

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                                        #19 Help: Don’t be afraid to ask someone for help; friend, colleagues or a therapist. Maybe you are struggling emotionally. Maybe you need help with launching a business. Often we get caught up in what we are doing, we forget that help is just a phone call away.

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                                          #20 Be silly: Do something that you did as a child. Don’t take life too seriously.

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                                            #21 Surround yourself with beauty: Visit an art gallery. Re-instill beauty in your life.

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                                              #22 Restore your faith in humanity: Search the internet for inspiring stories.

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                                                #23 Surround yourself with positive people who can support you.

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                                                  #24 Let your hair down: A night out in town might help you blow off some steam.

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                                                    #25 Meditate: Learn to calm yourself.

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                                                      #26 Hydrate: Don’t forget to drink enough water.

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                                                        #27 Check your self-talk. Negative self-talk does not serve you.

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                                                          #28 Change your self-talk to positive self-talk.

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                                                            #29 Eat: Make sure you eat healthy foods; if possible,smaller portions.

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                                                              #30 Watch a silly movie: This can be a welcome distraction.

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                                                                #31 When you wake up, stretch like you did when you were young.

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                                                                  #32 Shower: A nice warm shower makes you feel good.

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                                                                    #33 If you feel something is wrong physiologically, schedule a meeting with your doctor.

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                                                                      #34 Cuddle: whether it’s your dog, cat, friend or partner. We are human. We require touch.

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                                                                        #35 Intense Exercise: running or even swimming. This will increase energy levels.

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                                                                          #36 Journal: Develop a habit of journaling. This will help free your mind.

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                                                                            #37 Small steps: If you feel overwhelmed by everything, break it all up into small actionable steps.

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                                                                              #38 Gratitude list: Write down a list of 20 things you can be grateful for.

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                                                                                #39 Accomplishments: Write down a list of 20 things you have accomplished so far.

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                                                                                  #40 Remind yourself of the value you have to offer. We are often so good at something, that it becomes second nature. We don’t recognize that it’s something other people can’t easily do. Recognize that value.

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                                                                                    #41 Write down the two most important things you want to complete each day.

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                                                                                      #42 Wake up. Complete the two most important things. Then do other tasks.

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                                                                                        #43 Clean your bedroom. De-cluttering your environment is magical.

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                                                                                          #44 Relax: Lie in an open field and stare at the clouds.

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                                                                                            #45 Read a good book. Get lost in another world.

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                                                                                              #46 Take a break from social media, if it all feels too much.

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                                                                                                #47 Avoid the comparison game. If you find yourself comparing yourself to others remind yourself (daily) that it’s not healthy.

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                                                                                                  #48 Pamper yourself. Go to the spa.

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                                                                                                    #49 Ask for reassurance from family and friends. Hearing ‘all will be fine’ is often all that is needed.

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                                                                                                      #50 Listen to your favorite music (not a love song, if you are heartbroken).

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                                                                                                        #51 Volunteer and give back to your community. Maybe a pet shelter?

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                                                                                                          #52 Find a safe place to scream and let it all out. Keeping emotions bottled up is not healthy. It creates stress and can cause anxiety.

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                                                                                                            #53 Eat foods that make you feel comfortable.

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                                                                                                              #54 Embrace silence. Go somewhere to be alone.

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                                                                                                                #55 Think about your dreams. Allow yourself to dream. Write down your dreams.

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                                                                                                                  #56 Do simple coloring in books. Be like a child.

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                                                                                                                    #57 Take a walk on the beach. The ocean is soothing.

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                                                                                                                      #58 Mountains are strong and secure. Find them. Absorb them.

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                                                                                                                        #59 If Self-help books overwhelm you. Read fiction instead.

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                                                                                                                          #60 Get inspired. Watch inspiring videos on Youtube.

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                                                                                                                            #61 Find those that have overcome what you are going through to restore inner strength.

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                                                                                                                              #62 Get expert help (psychologist, doctor etc) if required. Ask family for help with this.

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                                                                                                                                #63 You have won the lottery. Just being alive and being able to breathe is a privilege. Remind yourself of this each morning when you wake-up.

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                                                                                                                                  #64 Routines: When life is chaotic, establishing a routine provides stability.

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                                                                                                                                    #65 Embrace the sun. Soak it up. Go outdoors.

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                                                                                                                                      #66 10 min alignment exercise. Set a deep meaningful goal (e.g. being self-employed). Write down all the skills and abilities you have to achieve it now. Sit with those thoughts until you feel excited.

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                                                                                                                                        #67 Sit in silence and just breathe. In and out. Nice deep breaths.

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                                                                                                                                          #68 Seek out happy memories: go through photos of loved ones or even postcards from friends.

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                                                                                                                                            #69 Relax. Have a warm bath. Clear your mind.

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                                                                                                                                              #70 Invest in a miniature Zen Garden. Start by searching on the internet.

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                                                                                                                                                #71 Walk barefoot in the grass. This can be therapeutic.

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                                                                                                                                                  #72 Bake bread. Enjoy the process. Absorb the comforting smells of your creation.

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                                                                                                                                                    #73 Watch the sunrise, whilst sipping your favorite coffee. Get excited about the day that lies ahead.

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                                                                                                                                                      #74 Watch the sunset, with a glass of wine. Recap on the day.

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                                                                                                                                                        #75 Decorate your room or house. Make it look beautiful.

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                                                                                                                                                          #76 Call your boss. Tell him you’re sick. Just take the day off to unwind from all the stress.

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                                                                                                                                                            #77 Create a morning ritual that provides the needed support.

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                                                                                                                                                              #78 Or (because everyone is different) you can develop an evening ritual instead.

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                                                                                                                                                                #79 Switch off all devices an hour before you sleep for a good night’s rest.

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                                                                                                                                                                  #80 Help someone else with their problems. This can often be the best self-care.

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                                                                                                                                                                    #81 Watch a comedy show (live or on T.V.). Get yourself to laugh. Laughter, as they say, is often the best medicine.

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                                                                                                                                                                      #82 Dance. Dance on your own. Dance in your house. Dance wildly.

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                                                                                                                                                                        #83 Walk your dog and get exercise.

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                                                                                                                                                                          #84 Walk someone else’s dog and do them a favor in the process.

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                                                                                                                                                                            #85 Seek out new experiences. Do something you haven’t done before.

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                                                                                                                                                                              #86 Ideas. Start writing down all your ideas. Carry a notepad with you.

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                                                                                                                                                                                #87 Be spontaneous. Instill excitement into your life. For example, take a drive on the spur of the moment. If a friend calls you to do something, do it.

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                                                                                                                                                                                  #88 Sign-up for the gym. Exercise helps clear your mind.

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                                                                                                                                                                                    #89 Or exercise in the comfort of your home – you don’t have to spend lots of money to stay fit.

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                                                                                                                                                                                      #90 Plan a short road trip with a friend to get away.

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                                                                                                                                                                                        #91 Speak to a nutritionist to develop a food plan that can support you.

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                                                                                                                                                                                          #92 Try yoga. It’s great for the body and the mind.

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                                                                                                                                                                                            #93 Get rid of limiting beliefs that do not serve you. You may believe that you cannot do something, but is this really true? Consider what you can do right now to make it happen. Maybe you can ask for a friend’s advice to start?

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                                                                                                                                                                                              #94 Use your senses. Buy some incense for your house.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                #95 Love. Call someone (instead of texting). Tell them you love them.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                  #96 Listen to classical music. Get relaxed and improve your intelligence.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                    #97 Spoil yourself. Buy yourself presents – flowers or even a new dress.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                      #98 Sketch. Take out a notepad and start sketching. This can be therapeutic.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                        #99 Wake up and listen to inspirational podcasts to get you motivated.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          #100 Remind yourself that life is a journey. Remember that what you are going through is temporary, It will pass.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          Nick Darlington

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Nick is a Multipotentialite, an entrepreneur, a blogger and a traveler.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Study Says Art Makes You Mentally Healthier, Even If You’re Not Good At It When You Can Stop Yourself From Multitasking, Your Brain Will Start To Change How Silence Affects Our Brains in A Good Way, Science Explains 5 Things That Will Happen When You Wake Up Two Hours Earlier For A Month Why Overthinkers Are Probably Creative Problem-Solvers

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          Last Updated on April 19, 2021

                                                                                                                                                                                                          How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

                                                                                                                                                                                                          How to Deal With Anger (The Ultimate Anger Management Guide)

                                                                                                                                                                                                          We all lose our temper from time to time, and expressing anger is actually a healthy thing to do in our relationships with others. Expressing our differences in opinion allows us to have healthy conflict and many times come to an agreement or understanding that works for everyone. However, there are times when anger can become overwhelming or damaging, and during these times, it’s important to learn how to deal with anger.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Expressing anger inappropriately can be harmful to relationships, both personal and professional. You may express too much anger, too often, or at times that are only going to make things worse, not better. In this article we will look at anger management techniques that will help you better control your emotions.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Let’s take a deeper look at how to deal with anger.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Expressing Anger

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Anger is a natural and normal part of almost any relationship. This includes relationships with your significant other, kids, boss, friends, family, etc. Anger provides us with valuable information if we are willing to listen to it. It clues us in to areas where we disagree with others and things that need to be changed or altered.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Unhealthy Ways to Express Anger

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Here are some common yet unhealthy ways to express anger that you should avoid:

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being Passive-Aggressive

                                                                                                                                                                                                          This is a term many of us are familiar with. Passive-aggressive behavior happens when someone is angry but uses indirect communication to express their anger.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Some of the more common passive-aggressive behaviors include the silent treatment, making comments about someone behind their back, being grumpy, moody, or pouting, or simply not doing tasks or assignments that they should.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          This is a passive-aggressive person’s way of showing their anger. It’s not very productive but extremely common.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          Poorly-Timed

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Some people get overwhelmed and express anger in a situation where it can’t really do any good.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          An example would be getting angry at one person in front of a crowd of people. All that does is make people uncomfortable and shuts them down. It’s not a healthy way to express anger or disagreement with someone.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Ongoing Anger

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being angry all the time is most often a symptom of something else. It’s healthy and normal to express anger when you disagree with someone. However, if someone is angry most of the time and always seems to be expressing their anger to everyone around them, this won’t serve them well.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Over time, people will start to avoid this person and have as little contact as possible. The reason being is no one likes being around someone who is angry all the time; it’s a no-win situation.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Healthy Ways to Express Anger

                                                                                                                                                                                                          What about the healthy ways[1] to adapt? When learning how to deal with anger, here are some healthy ways to get you started.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being Honest

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Express your anger or disagreement honestly. Be truthful about what it is that is making you angry. Sometimes this will entail walking away and thinking about it for a bit before you respond.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Don’t say you’re mad at something someone did or said when it’s really something else that upset you.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being Direct

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Similar to being honest, being direct is a healthy way to express anger.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          Don’t talk around something that is making you angry. Don’t say that one thing is making you angry when it’s really something else, and don’t stack items on top of each other so you can unload on someone about 10 different things 6 months from now.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Be direct and upfront about what is making you angry. Ensure you are expressing your anger to the person who upset you or you are angry at, not to someone else. This is very counterproductive.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being Timely

                                                                                                                                                                                                          When something makes you angry, it’s much better to express it in a timely manner. Don’t keep it bottled up inside of you, as that’s only going to do more harm than good.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Think of the marriages that seem to go up in flames out of nowhere when the reality is someone kept quiet for years until they hit their breaking point.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Expressing anger as it occurs is a much healthier way of using anger to help us guide our relationships in the moment.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          How to Deal With Anger

                                                                                                                                                                                                          If you feel angry, how should you deal with it right at that moment?

                                                                                                                                                                                                          1. Slow Down

                                                                                                                                                                                                          From time to time, I receive an email at work that makes me so angry that steam is probably pouring out of my ears.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          In my less restrained moments, I have been known to fire off a quick response, and that typically has ended about as well as you might imagine.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          When I actually walk away from my computer and go do something else for a while, I am able to calm down and think more rationally. After that happens, I am able to respond in a more appropriate and productive manner. Doing things that helps you learn how to release anger can make an uncomfortable situation more manageable before it gets out of hand.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          2. Focus on the “I”

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Remember that you are the one that’s upset. Don’t accuse people of making you upset because, in the end, it’s your response to what someone did that really triggered your anger. You don’t want to place blame by saying something like “Why don’t you ever put away your dishes?” Say something more like “Having dirty dishes laying on the counter upsets me—can you work with me to come to a solution?”

                                                                                                                                                                                                          When you are accusatory towards someone, all that does is increase the tension. This doesn’t usually do anything except make your anger rise higher.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          3. Work out

                                                                                                                                                                                                          When learning how to deal with anger, exercise is a great outlet. If something happens that angers you, see if you have the opportunity to burn off some of the anger.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Being able to hit the gym to get a hard workout in is great. If this isn’t an option, see if you can go for a run or a bike ride. If you are at work when you become angry and the weather permits, at least go outside for a brisk walk.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Besides working some of your anger out through exercise, this also helps to give your mind a chance to work through some ways to address what it is that upset you.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          If you’re not sure where to start with an exercise routine, check out Lifehack’s free Simple Cardio Home Workout Plan.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          4. Seek Help When Needed

                                                                                                                                                                                                          There are times when we could all use some help. Life can be stressful and overwhelming. It’s perfectly fine to seek some help from a mental health professional if it will help you get back to a healthy balance.If you find that you are angry all the time, it might be a good idea to go talk to an expert about learning to control intense emotions. They can give you some sound advice and ideas on how to get your anger to a more manageable and healthy level.

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                                                                                                                                                                                                          5. Practice Relaxation

                                                                                                                                                                                                          We all seem to lead incredibly busy lives, and that’s a good thing if we are loving the life we are living. That being said, it is very beneficial to our physical and mental well-being to take time out for relaxation.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          That can mean spending time doing things that help us calm down and relax, like being around people we enjoy, practicing deep breathing or listening to music. It could be making time for things that help bring us balance like a healthy diet and physical activity.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Many people incorporate techniques such as yoga and meditation to calm their minds and release tension when learning how to deal with anger. Whatever your choice is, ensure you take time out to relax when warning signs of anger start to bubble up.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          6. Laugh

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Incorporating humor and laughter on a regular basis will help keep anger in check and help you get over a bad mood and feelings of anger more quickly. This isn’t part of formal anger management techniques, but you’ll be surprised by how well it works. Remember, life is a journey that’s meant to be enjoyed fully along the way through healthy emotion. Make sure you take time to laugh and have fun.Surround yourself with people that like to laugh and enjoy life. Don’t work at a job that just causes you stress, which can lead to anger. Work at something you enjoy doing.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          7. Be Grateful

                                                                                                                                                                                                          It’s easy to focus on the bad in life and the things that cause us negative emotions. It’s vitally important to remind ourselves of all the wonderful things in life that bring us positive emotions, things that we easily forget because we get caught up in the whirlwind of day to day life.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Take time out each day to remind yourself of a few things you are grateful for in order to help you learn how to release anger and invite in more positive feelings.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Final Thoughts

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Life can be overwhelming at times. We seem to have constant pressure to achieve more and to always be on the go or motivated. People we are around and situations we are in can cause stress, anger, and negative emotions. At times, it can seem to be too much, and we get angry and our emotions start to get out of control.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          During these times, keep in mind that life is an incredible journey, full of wonder and things that bring you joy. When you find yourself angry more often than is healthy, take time out to remember the good things in life—the things that we seem to forget yet bring us so much positive energy and emotions.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Use some of the tips included here to help with how to deal with anger and better control your emotions.

                                                                                                                                                                                                          More Resources on Anger Management

                                                                                                                                                                                                          Featured photo credit: Andre Hunter via unsplash.com

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