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5 Reasons Why It Is Alright If Your Dream Changes

5 Reasons Why It Is Alright If Your Dream Changes

I find myself in a different country, a different city and a different culture. This was always the dream: To come to the United States, pursue my life-long dream and change the world for the better – I literally flew across the ocean, that’s how big that dream was. Maybe you also made some huge decisions and sacrifices for your dream, and if you still find your heart being blown out of your rib cage with excitement and passion, then I am really happy for you. My advice to you is to go for it, don’t hold back and be happy and grateful for all the steps in your journey – don’t make up excuses not to do it, the article 5 Terrible Excuses For Why People Let Their Dreams Go might help you with those excuses created by fear.

However, if you have found yourself being pulled into another direction or even a few directions – this article is for you. In it I will show you why it is alright if your dream changes and why you shouldn’t fret all the time spent and the sacrifices made on your previous dream – it was, and is a part of you that you shouldn’t disregard as nothing.

Different stages of losing an old dream and finding a new one:

Let’s be honest, it’s not an easy venture to accept the loss of the thing you prized most in this life – it can be something that shakes you to the core. A dream is something you nurture, love and believe in with your whole heart, and to find it slowly or perhaps suddenly evaporating can be quite scary. As with any loss you find yourself going through the different stages of it: Anger, bargaining, denial, depression and yes, eventually acceptance. It might take you a while to move through these stages or it might be something that happens in a blink of an eye – but whether you like it or not, this is what you will have to go through in order for you to move on to your next dream.

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And then? Then you allow it in. Let it take over control – don’t try and keep it at bay because of fear. Fear brings you nowhere and only puts you in a state of paralysis where you can be of no use to yourself or to others, and there is too much potential and promise in you to allow that to happen. There is something great in all of us that is begging to be set free from its cage of inhibitions and it’s our responsibility to make sure we break that cage and allow it to fly free.

3 Ways to set your greatness free from its imprisonment:

1. Move Past the Fear of Change:

Change is inevitable and the only constant thing in life. We have to accept it, otherwise we will never be able to move on to new horizons.

2. Move Past The Fear of Rejection:

Who are you living for? In the end, despite everyone’s opinion – this is your life, you have to live it your way. It’s important to remember that everyone else are so caught up living their own lives too – that they really pay no mind to you and what you might think. This sounds harsh, but unfortunately we live in a generation that is a little too self-involved to really care. With regards to your family and friends: If they truly love you, they will accept it no matter what.

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3. Move Past The Fear of the Unknown:

Yes, that big, scary and very foggy place known as the “unknown.” Do we really have to fear it that much? If you think about it, all of life is really unknown territory until we step out and try it – how bad has those little steps of faith really turned out? Granted, it might not always turn out as you have expected it to turn out. However, more often than not, it turns out to be the best adventure you went on – where you learn more about yourself and what you want than you would have learned by being stuck in the same position and dreaming the same dream that no longer serves you.

Now that you see that there really is no reason to fear the greatness of a new dream inside you, let us move on to why it is alright if your dream changes and what you eventually get out of that decision of acceptance.

5 Reasons why it is alright if your dream changes:

1. Freedom:

You are no longer bound by a dream that doesn’t serve you and only steals your peace of mind.

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2. Wisdom:

You have now gained more knowledge about yourself and what is really important to you. Accept the fact that your old dream taught you a lot of lessons on sacrifice, patience, hope, faith and many more life lessons – carry it with you in your new dream and grow a little more.

3. Strength:

You are strong enough to let go of the past and embrace the future, as well as the unknown. This is something that will help you in all aspects facing change in your life, for you will know that you are not only wise enough to deal with it, but also strong enough to go on.

4. Self-knowledge:

We as human beings are constantly changing – yes, we remain the same at our core, but our ever-changing views and perception of life influences us. Consciously and subconsciously we are evolving into beings that bring us closer to our core beliefs and what we really want to do in this life. If we are constantly changing, is it not a given that our dreams will also change with us? This is sure to happen until we eventually reach a point where we know exactly who we are and what we stand for.

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5. New Horizons:

Be ready to go on the adventure of a lifetime, seeing things in a way you never imagined you could, meeting people you never thought you would and exploring life in a way that you always knew you should. Make room for excitement, passion, roads less traveled and hidden treasures. For this is what being bold does – it opens up a whole new world for you.

Conclusion:

In conclusion I leave you with the words of the very wise author, who with these words inspired me to dig deeper within myself and allow me to let go of the dream that had become nothing more than my safety net, allowing me to open my arms wide for the unknown – despite my constant battle with the fear that it brings along:

Never too old to Dream a new dream

    Featured photo credit: Théo Gosselin via flickr.com

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    Bianca Gouws

    Freelance Writer, Director and Actress

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    Last Updated on January 14, 2019

    The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

    The Key to Finding Job Satisfaction and Having a Successful Career

    Regardless of whether you hold an entry-level administration role or regularly travel to the ends of the Earth as a hot-shot senior executive, you can still find yourself harboring an emptiness… a feeling that something is missing. A popular assumption that experiencing job satisfaction and a successful career should be underpinned by a well-rounded suite of tangible benefits, no longer holds true for many of us.

    We’d never deny health care benefits, appropriate and fair remuneration, bonuses and travel perks in a job package. However, even if served to us on a silver platter, those features can only satiate us to a certain point.

    You might wonder what governs entrepreneurs and start-up business owners to quit their lucrative jobs, essentially look the gift horse in the mouth and kiss such benefits goodbye! There can be an irresistible pull to mastermind a business with products and/or services that serve the greater good of community wider than that constituting their daily existence.

    Even with research showing entrepreneurship to pose greater threats to their mental and physical health, this unique breed of individuals choose to go against the grain in chasing their dreams of being their own boss. Why? Why would anyone risk this type of career suicide?

    Whether you’re an employee, have recently taken the leap to being a business owner or been in business for a while, the commonality is a congenital condition we all share as human beings; to feel a sense of purpose, value and contribution to our community. Despite it being harder to find this for ourselves in today’s world, these approaches will help you achieve ultimate satisfaction through the twists, turns and joyrides that are essential features of shaping a successful career.

    1. Search for Opportunities That Feed Your Passion, Not Temporary Excitement

    Even though well-intended, the ‘feel good now’ compass that career coaches and consultants often recommend you use to create career satisfaction can actually do you more harm than good. Excitement is transient. It doesn’t last. Passion is the compass you need.

    Passion and excitement are two different things. The resounding career legacy that still draws you to turn up on the job regardless of the sunshine or storm that awaits you…that’s passion. It’s like a mental and/or emotional itch you can’t shrug off. Staying attuned to that calling will breed success for you sooner or later. Patience is key.

    You’re also likely to have more than one key passion. Beware of getting caught in the notion you have to find your one true purpose. In fact, run immediately from any coach who tells you there is only one. There isn’t.

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    Your passion is a journey that can take multiple forms so forget thinking there is the single dream job out there that will give you satisfaction in every way you can imagine. It simply doesn’t exist.

    Consider embracing different roles and projects to help you fuel your passion or fuel your pursuits in finding it. Job satisfaction and your career success will be all the more sweeter from a wider range of enriching experiences.

    2. Don’t Position Job and Career Satisfaction Assessments as Pivotal Guides to Your Success

    Despite their popular use for vocational guidance, assessment tools such as Gallup’s Clifton Strengths and the Myers Briggs Type Indicator have come under fire[1] as being limited to the amount of true value and direction they can offer partakers.[2] These and many other guidance assessment tools (e.g. VIA Character Strengths , DISC ) are self-report questionnaires that don’t have normative population data against which to compare your results.

    Simply remember these tools help you develop a stronger sense of what you identify as strengths and weaknesses within yourself, not in comparison with other people. They will still add insight around what sorts of career opportunities, tasks and projects are going to light your fire, what ones are going to extinguish it and what will prod and keep the coals steadily smoldering.

    3. Be Clear on Your Personal Values, Ethics and Principles and Choose Relationships That Support You Honoring Them

    Teamwork, collaboration, open communication and trust are commonplace for any flourishing work environment. However, whether or not your personal values can be honored in your work can make or break your job satisfaction.

    How committed do you want to be to an organization that expects an average of 10 unpaid overtime hours every week under the guise of ‘reasonable overtime’? Are you willing to accept their construing this expectation as ‘strong commitment’ at the expense of your partner and children waiting at home for you? What are your boundaries concerning when you clock on to their time and when you clock off to yours?

    Being very in tune with what your personal values, principles and ethics are will bid you well in the job satisfaction stakes. Spending time to reflect on experiences and working relationships you’ve had – the good, the bad and the ugly – will help you make well-informed searches and grounded decisions that will propel your career success.

    Finding and nurturing relationships with associates and colleagues who share similar values doesn’t just make your day-to-day pursuits more enjoyable. You become fortunate to work with like-minded people who will support, understand and appreciate you like a second family.

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    Being able to honor your personal values in your work means you will still be able to sleep at night when you have to tread where others fear to, and make extremely difficult decisions others would never ever dream of having to make as you forge success in your career.

    4. Be Clear on Your Own Definition of What Having a Successful Career Means for You

    It’s tempting to get caught up in the ideals and projections of success expressed by those we love, admire and respect. Underneath, we all want on some level to belong to a successful club of some sort.

    With research reporting how much money we feel we need to be truly happy,[3] many of us try to subscribe to the notion that having the car of our dreams or taking a European holiday annually will not bring us happiness. The truth, however, for many of us is these tangible rewards are congratulatory reminders of our persistent efforts to chase our career pursuits.

    If those are things you aspire to, don’t let anyone steal your desire and want to feel deserving of these things, that those are some parameters by which you define your career success.

    Despite consistently being the top revenue earner for two years running, you may not wish to become the sales manager. You may not wish to step out into running your own business even though you consistently excel as an employee, delighting clients and repeatedly receiving glowing testimonials.

    Your definition of career success might be enjoying the predictability of a regular workplace routine. You get to leave – without feeling guilty – at the same time each day, love the people you work with and get to spend a good, uninterrupted amount of work-stress free quality time with your family. That picture is also blissful job satisfaction and complete career success.

    5. Identify the Sorts of Challenges and Problems You Want to Learn to Overcome

    Standard advice you might receive from a career coach might be to look for opportunities where you get to capitalize on exercising your strengths and career-related activities you enjoy.

    However, to become a success at anything involves improvement. To excel at anything often involves stepping outside boundaries and comfort zones where others wouldn’t. This means dedicating focus and attention to things you’re not so good at and things you don’t like.

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    Here’s where working with a coach can be particularly helpful. Map out the experiences that were unsavory in your working history. Were there challenges you opted out of, projects you failed at or toxic relationships that blasted your sense of purpose and self-worth into oblivion? It’s within these experiences that you might just find the most valuable lessons and guiding lights for your trajectory to achieve greater job satisfaction.

    If your natural leadership style is to be a collaborator, finding opportunities that require you to apply a more dictatorial style might be needed. Discussing a secondment or short-term project where you get to develop and test your skills can be a step further in earning contention to lead a larger project down the track.

    With several of the company’s boldest personality types penciled to roll out the operation, you’ll not only develop skills that earn your right to throw your hat in the ring; those key players have an opportunity to see your competence. You can then work on building relationships with those stakeholders before you need to hit the ground running should you win the lead.

    Greater job satisfaction comes with planning and choosing the lessons and opportunities you want to learn, not desperately flailing, floundering and hoping for the best.

    6. Keep Reviewing Your Goal Posts and Be Amenable to Change

    The word ‘career’ is indicative of a longer-term pathway of change, growth and development. The journey is dynamic.

    You will accumulate new skills and let those you no longer need, become rusty. Your intrigue will be stimulated by new experiences, knowledge and people you meet. Your thinking will continue to expand, not shrink. As a result, your goalposts are likely to change.

    A major part of enjoying a successful career is not just setting goals effectively, but regularly reviewing and readjusting them where necessary. However, moving the posts or the target still needs to take place by applying the same processes by which you originally created them. The strength of your emotional connection to those revised goals needs to be the same, if not stronger.

    By asking yourself the following questions, you can assure your developmental and growth trajectory is still on course:

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    • Would working toward these goals still allow me to honor my personal values, principles and ethics at the same capacity if not greater?
    • Do the activities I need to undertake to meet these goals honor my highest priorities?
    • Does this feel right for me and those who are nearest and dearest to me?
    • Is this aligned with my passion?
    • Is chasing this goal a right step for me to take now or is this a detour or distraction which could delay my greater plan?

    Each of your career goals should have different review periods. Whatever you do, stick to the review schedule you set. It will not only keep you focused but help you see your progress (or lack thereof) and allow you to timely re-chart your course before you get too far down the track. You don’t want to waste time haphazardly heading in the wrong direction.

    7. Be Prepared to Let Go

    It can be unfathomable to us as to why others risk leaping into the unknown when everything truly appears fine and dandy in the career realm. The company provided stability, recognition, financial success, interesting projects and the promise of a promotion…what was wrong? Why now jump sideways to run a café or train in another field altogether?

    Nothing may have been wrong at all. It was all going right. It was just the end of a chapter. Perhaps the yearning for the next step is actually taking a different trajectory entirely. You may want to simply experience a different rhythm. Perhaps it’s time to pursue a different passion.

    If you have leaped from employee-land to freelancing or have made the reverse-jump (or you know someone who has), you will have quickly grown a different appreciation for pros and cons each work lifestyle brings. Working for yourself can bring the greater realization of your creativity, whether or not it can be monetized to earn you a living.

    When your customers are buying you or a product you designed and fashioned, there is a direct level of appreciation and gratitude that can elevate your confidence in the way you have never experienced as an employee, regardless of your rank.

    Similarly, there are times where we need to recognize our business ventures were adventures, not long-term life-changing empires. There are times we need to recognize that time is what provides the clearest limitation of how long we persist for in such pursuits.

    We have to recognize the absence of enough financial, mental, emotional and physical breadcrumbs that tells us we’re no longer meant to push in that direction. At least, not for the present time.

    The Bottom Line

    Above all, keep the momentum. As long as you remain committed to pursuing work opportunities that allow you to honor your highest priorities, the truth of who you are and what you stand for, achieving ultimate job satisfaction and a successful career will never be too far away.

    More Resources to Help Advance Your Career

    Featured photo credit: Csaba Balazs via unsplash.com

    Reference

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